Letters Written and Never Sent 3
I had plans of not emailing Cotten today - giving her a day off from me
But I didn't get to talk to her today and ppl at school weren't very nice today - definitly not a good stabble day. BUT the good news is that I didn't cut myself - but after today I am really thinking that I don't wanna go back - ever - but I want so much to GRADUATE this is soooo frusterating and once again I am crying - I handle my stress in not the most ideal way but I didn't cut so I do have something to be proud of
I had a bit of a nap and I woke up sweating like a mad cow and crying - so I felt maybe (even thought I am SOOO tired) maybe sleeping isn;t the best idea right now
Last night at work they were assholes and it really hurt me. I told Shade I wasn't in the best mood and I knew he meant his teasing in a nice way but I asked him not to and he just couldn't stop and it really bothered me, and I was telling him that but hes suck a fucking reject that he can't listen, and then once waterloos power went out we got hit with customers - the good thing was that I had not time to think or feel sad - the bad part was I didn't stop going anf going and Ididn't get to drying dishes (which offen happens) and Shade FREAKED on me about it and I told him to get off his lazy ass and do it his self - him doing that really hurt me and I am not looking at is as forgivable - I really didn't see him as someone who would be such an asshole.
But right now I am sitting alone in my living room singing at the top of my lungs haha and the song I am listening to is actually making me think of Cotten and the support she gives me - so thats actually why I finally decided to email her - its not a love song LOL haha but you know me with my country musis - but at least this one is making me feel good
I called my counsellor and told her I was stressed and she barely even really talked to me - argh - I can't talk to her and it pisses me off - stupid interns
well Imma go - this song isn't soo happy
But I didn't get to talk to her today and ppl at school weren't very nice today - definitly not a good stabble day. BUT the good news is that I didn't cut myself - but after today I am really thinking that I don't wanna go back - ever - but I want so much to GRADUATE this is soooo frusterating and once again I am crying - I handle my stress in not the most ideal way but I didn't cut so I do have something to be proud of
I had a bit of a nap and I woke up sweating like a mad cow and crying - so I felt maybe (even thought I am SOOO tired) maybe sleeping isn;t the best idea right now
Last night at work they were assholes and it really hurt me. I told Shade I wasn't in the best mood and I knew he meant his teasing in a nice way but I asked him not to and he just couldn't stop and it really bothered me, and I was telling him that but hes suck a fucking reject that he can't listen, and then once waterloos power went out we got hit with customers - the good thing was that I had not time to think or feel sad - the bad part was I didn't stop going anf going and Ididn't get to drying dishes (which offen happens) and Shade FREAKED on me about it and I told him to get off his lazy ass and do it his self - him doing that really hurt me and I am not looking at is as forgivable - I really didn't see him as someone who would be such an asshole.
But right now I am sitting alone in my living room singing at the top of my lungs haha and the song I am listening to is actually making me think of Cotten and the support she gives me - so thats actually why I finally decided to email her - its not a love song LOL haha but you know me with my country musis - but at least this one is making me feel good
I called my counsellor and told her I was stressed and she barely even really talked to me - argh - I can't talk to her and it pisses me off - stupid interns
well Imma go - this song isn't soo happy