(no subject)
My god, FINALLY!
I started working on this picpsam before the season ended, and found it way too painful to continue, after the horror that the finale was. I could barely look at a cap with these two and not want to burst into tears or hurl something across the room. It looked like it was time to pack my bags for this ship, when I could clearly see the show ruthlessly dismantling them. But being a total sucker for heartfail, and having the tendency to ship it harder when things get impossible, I couldnt give up (on them, the show I divorced, sadly). The writing for Dean/Castiel, (and individually as well, both had potentially epic storylines that never materialised) has been horrid this season, but it doesnt change that what they have is canon, and undeniable. So yeah, never abandoning ship, nope. And foolish of me, I know, Im going to be hoping that S6 fixes what S5 wrecked. The only way Im giving Supernatural another chance.
This doesnt include all of the Dean/Cas scenes, just a few I picked. Beware of the babble.
5.02
Where the Dean/Castiel subtext becomes... text. Where there is ZERO PERSONAL SPACE between these two. Where they're having foreplay lovers spats, with Sam and Bobby in the same room. Where Dean hands over his amulet - which we know he has great emotional attachment with, and is kinda a tangible symbol, for him, of his relationship with Sam - to Castiel, so that Castiel can go off in search for someone that Dean doesnt even believe in.
Castiel: Enough. This is not a theological issue; it's strategic. With God's help, we can win.
Dean: It's a pipe-dream, Cas.
Castiel: I killed two angels this week. That's my brothers. I'm hunted, I rebelled, and I did it - all of it - for you. And you failed. You and your brother destroyed the world. And I lost everything, for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself.
Dean: What, this?
Castiel: May I borrow it?
Dean: No.
Castiel: Dean, give it to me.
Dean: Alright, I guess. Dont lose it. Great, now I feel naked.
Castiel: I'll be in touch.
Castiel's desperation comes across very clearly in this scene. He's lost everything, and all he has left, is his faith, in God, who he needs to believe can be found and will actually care. He still doesn't like his faith being challenged, (even though I suspect it was a tad shaky, notice how all he could do was insist that God is real, maybe cuz he wasnt sure that it was God that resurrected him) and isnt afraid to get into Dean's face and put him in his place when he's had enough. (Dont you love how Dean cant just stare back and swallow nervously haha?) But its vastly different from the last time he did something like this, in 4.02, it was more of a threat then, this time there's an emotional plea in his words. He wants Dean to believe him. And Dean, petulant and crabby, most of the time, cant say no to him. He cares.
5.03
Where I fell in love with Jeremy Carver all over again. Where we died and went to fangirl heaven. Where Cas sucked at being undercover, and was scared of the boobies. Where Dean didnt want Cas to die a virgin. (teehee) Where Bert and Ernie were gay, and so were Dean and Cas. Where DEAN LAUGHED. Where we see that the only things Castiel, who has lost everything, has got left, are his faith...and Dean.
Dean: You're serious about this. So what, I'm Thelma and you're Louise and we're just gonna hold hands and drive off this cliff together?
Dean: Look, gimme one good reason why I should do this.
Castiel: Because you're Michael's vessel, and no angel will dare harm you.
Dean: Oh, so I'm your bullet shield!
Castiel: I need your help, because you are the only one who'll help me. Please.
Slays me. Castiel turning to Dean for help, and admitting that he is all he has. There are no words. (Also to be noted, how Dean, again, cant say no to Castiel. I dont get why people always say that its just Castiel who cant refuse Dean anything.)
Castiel: What's so funny?
Dean: Oh, nothing. Whew. It's been a long time since I've laughed that hard. Oh. It's been more than a long time. Years.
I doubt there was anyone who didnt go Awww here. Everything about this little scene was touching and heartwarming. Castiel doesnt get whats so funny, probably knows that Dean's laughing at him, but it doesnt matter, cuz Dean's happy, and he's laughing, because of him. ♥ It does make my heart ache though, to know just how long its been since Dean was able to be his unguarded self, be truly happy.
Dean: Hey, you okay? [Cas stares straight ahead, not answering]
Look, I'll be the first to tell you that this little crusade of yours is nuts, but... I do know a little something about missing fathers.
Castiel: What do you mean?
Dean: I mean, there were times when I was looking for my dad when... all logic said that he was dead. But I knew, in my heart, that he was still alive. So, who cares what some Ninja Turtle says, Cas? What do you believe?
Castiel: I believe He's out there.
Dean: Good. Then go find Him.
Castiel: What about you?
Dean: What about me? I don't know. Honestly... I'm good. I can't believe I'm saying that, but I am, I'm... I'm really good.
Castiel: Even without your brother?
Dean: Especially without my brother. I mean, I spend so much time worrying about the son of a bitch. I mean, I've had more fun with you in the past twenty-four hours than I've had with Sam in years. And you're not that much fun. It's funny, you know, I've been so chained to my family, but now that I'm alone... hell, I'm happy.
This is where I feel Dean begins to relate to Cas. Sees him as another messed-up, abandoned son, who's lost and beginning to learn to think for himself. I loved how he talks about John, and how he knew that he was alive, how he wants to give Cas hope, (of finding a God he doesnt believe in, but it doesnt matter, cuz Cas does) how he wanted Cas to maybe take solace from it.
I wish Cas hadnt disappeared in the end though, Dean mightve said he was fine, we all know he wasnt. But I did like how Cas seemed to see through him, when he told him that he's especially happy to be away from Sam. It wasnt relief talking, more like hurt and betrayal.
5.04
Where we get hit by tons of epic mindfuck and heartfail. Where Cas has orgies. Where Cas laughs and it sounds all kinds of wrong. Where Dean is as inhuman as he mightve been when Cas found him in Hell. Where Dean sends out Cas for slaughter and Cas goes, even though he knows. Where we see that if Dean loses his way, Cas will too cuz true love is like that. Where DEAN DOESNT WANT CAS TO EVER CHANGE.
Future!Castiel: What? I like past you.
You can see Dean's jealous boyfriend routine if you squint. But once Im done squeeing about that and the fact that Cas likes past!Dean (canon, people), my heart starts to ache, cuz future!Cas doesnt like future!Dean, and future!Dean doesnt really give a shit.
It broke me too see how the two seemed to avoid looking the other in the eye, like they didnt recognise what the other had become, how future!Cas insisted on calling him "our Fearless Leader", like he wasnt Dean anymore. *wibble*
Dean: Amphetamines?
Future!Castiel: It's the perfect antidote to that absinthe.
Dean: Dont get me wrong, Cas, I... I'm happy that the stick is out of your ass, but what's going on? What's with the drugs and the orgies, and the love guru crap?
Whats so funny?
Future!Castiel: Dean, im not an angel anymore.
Dean: What?
Future!Castiel: Yeah, I went mortal.
Dean: So you're human? Well, welcome to the club.
Future!Castiel: Thanks. Except I used to belong to a much better club. And now I'm powerless. I'm hapless, I'm hopeless, I mean, why the hell not bury myself in women and decadence? Right? It's the end, baby! That's what decadence is for. Why not bang a few gongs before the lights go out?
(Ben killed me effectively with this broken and sinful portrait of a fallen angel. Then Misha played him gut-wrenchingly well, and stomped all over my corpse to make sure I was gone.)
I loved how disturbed Dean was in every interaction with future!Castiel. And in this scene, he does, what I doubt anyone has done in years, he asks Cas what is wrong, he shows concern, and Cas doesnt know what to do with that, other than laugh another of his joyless laughs. He knows how its going to end for him, he is going to die a meaningless death, most probably at the hand of the only person he has ever loved. *runs away sobbing*
This conversation also highlights one of the reasons why I didnt want Cas to turn human, cuz even with Dean around and his faith remaining intact, he might not ever get over being a part of a "better club".
Dean: That's pretty nice timing, Cas.
Castiel: We had an appointment.
Dean: Don't ever change.
*whimpers pathetically* Might be my favourite D/C scene ever. Look how adoringly they look at one another, the fond smiles, ITS LOOOVE gahhh. ♥ Loved how Cas was totally gloating inside, about saving Dean's ass, haha, but didnt rub it in. And Dean realised that he didnt want Cas to change, no matter how annoying and weird he might be, Dean needs him to stay like that.
5.08
Where we all died laughing. Where Dean was totally gay for Dr.Sexy. (Thank you, show!) Where the Trickster turned out to be Gabriel. Where Dean was flailing around, going WHERE IS CAAAS?!!
Dean: First of all, you're going to bring Cas back from wherever you stashed him.
Gabriel: Oh, am I?
Dean: Yeah. Or else we're going to dunk you in holy oil and deep fry ourselves in archangel. (Gabriel clicks his fingers and Cas appears) Cas, you okay?
Castiel: I'm fine.
I love Dean being all concerned for his angel, and I included this episode in the picspam solely for how Dean worried about Cas throughout, and demanded for him to be brought back, in the end. Dean flailing, wringing his hands, pacing around, tearing his hair out, fretting over Cas was too darn cute!
5.13
Where the show starts to fail me. Where Sam was suddenly Cas' friend. Where Anna was Glenn Close. Where the show reduced Cas to a time-travel cab driver. Where Dean was kind of a dick. Where Cas risked his life again to save some Winchester ass.
Sam: So the... the plan to kill me, would it actually stop Satan?
Dean: No Sam. C'mon.
Sam: Cas, what do you think? Does Anna have a point?
Castiel: No. She's..uh, Glenn Close.
Castiel: ...Taking this trip with passengers no less, it'll weaken me.
Dean: They're our mum and dad, if we can save them, and not just from Anna, I mean if we can set things right, we have to try.
Before the ~SASSY~ people throw tomatoes at me... Im not a hater. However, at this point, Sam/Cas and the way the show was trying to equalize things, annoyed me. (Sam and Cas shouldnt, and honestly, CANNOT have what Dean/Cas have.) We never saw any kind of bonding between them, and Cas' concern for him was always flitered through his concern for Dean.
This look, as fleeting as it was, is a part of this picspam, cuz omg they are so pretty it makes very clear, how its always about Dean... whatever Cas does for Sam, has indirectly or otherwise got to do with Dean. He is worried about Sam's fate, yes, but only cuz it matters to Dean and affects him. I love the pleading look in Dean's eyes, and how Cas understood what he needed him to tell Sam.
5.14
Where Dean and Cas have phone sex again another zero personal space moment. Where Dean shares his food wih Cas. (Its a huge deal, Dean's like Joey you see.) Where Cas breaks Dean's record for eating the most number of burgers in a day. Where Famine cant exploit Dean's hunger cuz its obviously Castiel and Dean is well-fed. (teehee) Where Cas tries to be there for Dean. Where Dean prays for some help. Where Dean and Cas hug, at the end of the episode, which we sadly we don get to see.
Castiel: Its not him in there, not really.
Dean: I know.
Castiel: Dean, Sam just has to get it out of his system, then he'll be...
Dean: Listen, I just... I just need to get some air.
This scene broke my heart. And it wasnt just about Sam crying out for Dean and Cas.There's just something about Cas staying with Dean, while Sam goes through withdrawal, Dean letting him see like that, Cas trying to comfort him, (in his own awkward way) even if Dean still isnt able to let Cas be there for him, that I find heart-breakingly moving.
5.16
Where we all want to go to Heaven cuz Cas is on TV there. Where we get to know that Zach has SIX WINGS AND FOUR FACES, ONE OF WHICH IS A LION LMFAO. Where Cas loses his faith in God, and Dean, in his brother. (there's nothing they dont do together, how married are they?) Where Cas kills us all just by looking sad. Where Dean trashes the amulet. Where Dean and Cas hug again, in the end, another one we dont get to see.
Castiel: Maybe, maybe Joshua was lying.
Sam: I dont think so, Cas. Im sorry.
Castiel: You son of a bitch... I believed in.
First, the one tiny detail that made me happy, Dean's first thought after coming back to life was to call Castiel. <3
For so long, Castiel's faith was unwavering, and to see him so broken and defeated, killed me. He gave up everything, only to hear that God didnt care! :( The Dean-like cursing was more disturbing than amusing, and him saying the amulet was 'worthless' to him, the loss of purpose, scared me. Im sure we all panicked about him slouching towards future!Cas.
I love how Dean said nothing in this scene, he just watched, he couldnt take his eyes off Cas. He was out of hope and faith himself, he had nothing to say. Him binning the amulet said a lot though, he dismissed his brother, and God, who was his last hope, even though he didnt know that he'd let himself believe, till Joshua trashed it.
And I say it all the time, but WONT SOMEBODY *glares pointedly at Dean* HUG CAS?
5.17
Where Cas found a liquor store, and drank it. Where the ~SASSY~ people had a field day. Where Dean and Cas finally have a heart to heart, even though it lasts for 0.847563 seconds. Where we see that Castiel needs Dean to cope. Where Dean sadly is past helping Cas. Where I made up my mind that Lisa needed to die.
Dean: I've been there. I'm a big expert on deadbeat dads, so yeah, I get it.I know how you feel.
Castiel: How do you manage it?
Dean: On a good day, you get to kill a whore.
I loved drunken!Cas, how could I not, but I kinda resented how it was all mostly for the laughs, and so I liked when we finally got a scene where Cas seemed distraught. I loved that Cas opened up a little to Dean, he let himself be drawn into talking about it (unlike how he went 'dont ask stupid questions' when Sam asked if he was okay) he let Dean see that he wasnt dealing very well, even asked how he managed, and Dean got him, even if he didnt quite know how to console him or do anything about it.
This scene worried me equally though. I know Dean was drowning in a bucket of angst, and unable to be emotionally available, but I didnt like how drunken!Cas didnt ring any warning bells in Dean's head about future!drugaddict!Cas. I talked about this in the post I made a few days ago about The End, how Dean failing to see Cas' misery is the real reason we get future!Cas. Castiel needs to connect with Dean to cope, its always been like that, if Dean doesnt notice or bring himself to care, Cas will lose his way.
5.18 PONR PORN
Where we all got blessed by the Gods of orgasm. Where most of the fandom ended up writing angry, emotional porn. Where Cas rated epicly high on the BAMF-meter. Where Dean got laid. Also BLOW ME CAS. Where Cas beat Dean to pulp. WALL SLAMMING Part 2: DIRTY ALLEY Version. Where Dean learnt not to piss off nerd angels. Where Cas almost killed himself for the brothers Dean again.
Castiel: I rebelled for this? So you could surrender to them.
Dean: Cas. Please.
Castiel: I gave everything for you. And this is what you give to me?
Even if one dismisses the other two shippy lines in this episode as fanservice, there is no way this scene cant be not taken seriously.
I was very torn about how I felt about this whole fight. I didnt think Dean deserved it, he's spent his life getting beaten down by people, he didnt need it, not from Castiel. But I did see where Cas was coming from, he couldnt take Dean's betrayal, not on the heels of God abandoning him. He gave up everything. turned his back on everything he knew, for Dean, he's invested in the man, and besides giving back almost nothing to him, now he was going to turn around and give in, to what they were fighting against for so long.
On a slightly shallow note, THIS IS HOW TWO EMOTIONALLY STUNTED MEN EXPRESS THEIR EPIC LOVE, and had the show been on HBO, this scene wouldve SO ended up in some epic angry gay angel sex. Fact.
Dean: Do it. Just do it.
Dean's 'Cas please', and the way he didnt fight back at all, hurt me. I dont think Cas intended to really harm Dean, (and I wonder how he felt, knowing that Dean expected him to kill him) but when Dean asked Cas to 'do it', he was clearly begging for death, he just wanted it all, the pain, to end. I love the little moment (that shot of Cas' hand, Misha's hands emote too, bloody hell!) when we see the anger draining out of Cas, we see him getting slightly concerned, as he proceeds to knock Dean out.
Dean: Oh wait wait, you're gonna take on 5 angels?
Castiel: Yes.
Dean: Isnt that suicide?
Castiel: Maybe it is. But then I wont have to watch you fail. Sorry, Dean, I dont have the same faith in you that Sam does.
OUCH. Just ouch. Those words hurt. But while I was sad about Cas losing faith in Dean, it was assuaged by the fact that he hadnt lost all of it. He still went inside to fight the angels, he fucking nuked himself, for what, just so that the brothers had a chance, and Dean could say no.
I needed this scene to accomplish something it didnt, sadly, for Dean to realise, just how much faith Cas had in him, and to see what it means to have someone sacrifice everything for you. He's done that for others, but has never had someone do it for him. The show failed me.
5.21
Where we all finally realised that the show was killing our ship. Where the show refused to give us even ONE Dean/Cas hug/heart to heart/emotional moment. Where the much awaited Dean/Cas reunion happens over a fucking phone. Where I get fed up of making excuses for Dean's emotional retardness. Where Cas turns human, and no one gives a shit. Where I finally begin to buy Sam/Cas.
Castiel: I cant zap anywhere.
Dean: What do you mean?
Castiel: Lets say my batteries are drained.
Dean: What do you mean, you're out of angel mojo?
Castiel: Im saying that Im thirsty, and my head aches. I have a bug bite that itches no matter how much I scratch it. I'm saying that I'm just incredibly...
Dean: Human.
Castiel: Dean, wait. You said no to Michael. I own you an apology.
Dean: Cas. Its okay.
Castiel: You are not the burnt and broken shell of a man that I believed you to be.
Dean: Thank you. I appreciate it.
Castiel: You're welcome.
Ive ranted endlessly about how the reunion thing was done, I hated that Dean didnt apologise (and he shouldve, he did say ~yes, and that was the betrayal, even though there werent any consequences) when Cas did, hated how insensitive Dean seemed, how the phone conversation was not followed by something more, (where's the gratitude, where's the heart to heart, the hug?!) how no one seemed to notice how miserable Cas was. But this scene looks nice in screencaps, haha. And there are some little things I loved.
There were moments of sincerity and adorable awkwardness. I loved how worried Dean looked, how he had to sit down, when he understood that Cas was human, how he was all choked up when Cas apologised, (which was half insult and half apology, lol, only Cas!) and how there was something else he wanted to say when Cas hung up. (Maybe he wanted to apologise too?)
EPIC FAIL 5.22
Where the apocalypse ends. Where the Dean/Cas shippers abandon ship, the ones who dont, go into depression. Where I break up with the show. Where Dean and Cas are so OOC, the mind boggles. Where Dean is mean to Cas. Where Cas is just... Misha. Where Cas fucking asplodes, and all Dean can manage is... blank. WHERE CAS IS DEAN'S GOD. Where Cas, high on power, ditches Dean and leaves. Where we all hate Dean's apple-pie life as much he does.
I hate the dialogue in all the D/C scenes in the finale, but thankfully, Jensen and Misha are brilliant at acting with their eyes, having an entirely different conversation. I liked how desperate Dean was here, to have Cas believe, to still keep on fighting, to find a way to help him. And Cas, helpless, wanting to help him, but not knowing how.
Yeah, the intense eye!sex. Still there.
Dean: Cas, you're alive?
Castiel: I'm better than that.
Dean: Cas, are you God?
Castiel: It's a nice compliment, but no. Although I do believe He brought me back.
I loved the reverance in Dean's voice when he asks Cas if he's God, like he wanted him to be. And I adore that image of Dean on his knees, and Cas standing. (mind out of the gutter please lol)
And this is where I will end this picspam cuz I cannot tolerate the fuckery that was the last scene. Im glad Cas is back, new and improved, and that he will be HBIC in heaven and put things right, but I still cant help but feel he shouldnt have just, you know, LEFT. Dean needed him. And yes, I get he has responsibilites, and with the experience he's had, he has much to share with the other angels now, but honestly, I dont know how true that is anymore, the Cas we saw in that last scene, was eerily like 401!Cas, cuz with obliterating Dean/Cas, they almost negated all of Cas' development too.
Anyway, before I get carried away and start ranting again, I will bring this to an end, saying that while the show might have made it look like it was all in our heads...
(gif not made by me, credit to whoever did)
LOL.
Phew.