I think I need to stop drag racing.
I just told my coworker Steve that he should love me because I'm...
America's Sweetheart.
CLEARLY I AM TURNING INTO TYRA SANCHEZ.
...personally, I'd prefer turning into Tyra Banks (who, at this point, is her own drag queen impersonation), but that's not a bad tradeoff.
...to be fair, I was already halfway there (we both have man voices, and we both have disturbing obsessions with Beyonce Knowles and we're both gigantic bitches), but what
ALSO IN CROSSOVER NEWS: THE PHRASE "HOW YOU DOIN'" WAS EXCHANGED. I DIED. (I feel bad for Mystique now, though.)
...have I ever mentioned that RuPaul's Drag Race is possibly the best show on television right now?
In more work-related news: Today was...interesting, to say the least.
Let's see:
1) Started off the morning with the CONTAINER OF DOOM. I mean, it was beautifully doc prepped...it was just doc prepped horribly, horribly wrong. So I had to spend three hours disassembling it and putting it back together again.
2) ...which was after I came in to discover that one of my containers that I'd been assigned hadn't even been doc prepped. So I had to write a CYA note (well, I didn't have to, but I figured it'd be great if I noted what happened because I know I'm going to get blamed by Indexing over this, and I want a paper trail saying, "Look, I'm not a lazy bastard, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE THE DAMN BOX IS") about how it was off in the warehouse somewhere.
3) So after I got done with that project, I went back and started on another project. Which was easy and fun.
...except someone printed out the separator pages wrong. On the entire skid of ten boxes. (Just so you know, that's about 15,000 pages worth of documents we have to go through to replace stuff on and around 250 to 300 separator pages that have to be replaced.) And two of the containers are missing.
My supervisor said she had a headache. I apologized profusely (because, honestly, I think I'm doing my job if I don't give Eufronia a headache). But just why.
OH MY GOD RU WHY DID YOU MAKE US CHOOSE BETWEEN JUJU AND PANDORA WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
NO ONE WON IN THAT.
Ugh. I think Pandora probably deserved to stay more than Jujubee, though. As much as Juju is my girl, I would have probably eliminated her first.
I dunno, though. My opinion was that Pandora was the best queen overall (and not just because of the rampant "show me your boxx" jokes), but she had two things working against her:
1) Her age - she's 37; the other queens are in their 20's (hell, Tyra's 21 and Juju's my age).
2) More importantly - I think one of the things pointed out earlier in the competition was that she's more camp comedy, and I think Ru's looking more for someone who will confuse straight guys. Which is fine, but...like, I dunno, I may have thought Ru was a hot chick when I was 13 and confused, but now that I'm more settled in my ways I'm not really into sultry seductress queens. WE ALL KNOW IT'S A GAY MAN UNDER THE WIG, THE CHICKEN CUTLETS, AND THE ASS PADDING. MYSTIQUE IS EXEMPT FROM THE LAST TWO SINCE SHE HAS T&A TO SPARE THEY KNOW THEY'RE GAY MEN UNDER THE WIG, THE CHICKEN CUTLETS, AND THE ASS PADDING.
Hell, even if Ru makes a better-looking woman than he does a man (and truth be told, RuPaul is a handsome guy even if he is Botoxed to hell), we love him because he's funny and plays up the humor inherent in a guy dressed up as a woman. And at the humor game, I think Pandora wins hands-down. (At least on the intentional front. On the unintentional front, there's stiff competition from...nearly everyone else. Especially Tyra.)
That said: I AM SO GLAD THAT RAVEN WON, THOUGH. TATIANNA TOTALLY GOT SHOWN UP. YES.
It was really a Solomon's Choice, though. I think my alliances are clear in terms of who I favor, but other than Tati (who - to my disappointment - did not fuck it up this week), I don't know who I'd get rid of. Possibly Tyra - although she has bestowed numerous gifts on us (I mean, she is like the drag version of Dr. Evil with the entire Destiny's Child anthology on his iPod), I'm beginning to tire of her. But if you'd asked me to choose between Raven, Juju, and Pandora, I'd probably ask if death were an option.
America's Sweetheart.
CLEARLY I AM TURNING INTO TYRA SANCHEZ.
...personally, I'd prefer turning into Tyra Banks (who, at this point, is her own drag queen impersonation), but that's not a bad tradeoff.
...to be fair, I was already halfway there (we both have man voices, and we both have disturbing obsessions with Beyonce Knowles and we're both gigantic bitches), but what
ALSO IN CROSSOVER NEWS: THE PHRASE "HOW YOU DOIN'" WAS EXCHANGED. I DIED. (I feel bad for Mystique now, though.)
...have I ever mentioned that RuPaul's Drag Race is possibly the best show on television right now?
In more work-related news: Today was...interesting, to say the least.
Let's see:
1) Started off the morning with the CONTAINER OF DOOM. I mean, it was beautifully doc prepped...it was just doc prepped horribly, horribly wrong. So I had to spend three hours disassembling it and putting it back together again.
2) ...which was after I came in to discover that one of my containers that I'd been assigned hadn't even been doc prepped. So I had to write a CYA note (well, I didn't have to, but I figured it'd be great if I noted what happened because I know I'm going to get blamed by Indexing over this, and I want a paper trail saying, "Look, I'm not a lazy bastard, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE THE DAMN BOX IS") about how it was off in the warehouse somewhere.
3) So after I got done with that project, I went back and started on another project. Which was easy and fun.
...except someone printed out the separator pages wrong. On the entire skid of ten boxes. (Just so you know, that's about 15,000 pages worth of documents we have to go through to replace stuff on and around 250 to 300 separator pages that have to be replaced.) And two of the containers are missing.
My supervisor said she had a headache. I apologized profusely (because, honestly, I think I'm doing my job if I don't give Eufronia a headache). But just why.
OH MY GOD RU WHY DID YOU MAKE US CHOOSE BETWEEN JUJU AND PANDORA WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
NO ONE WON IN THAT.
Ugh. I think Pandora probably deserved to stay more than Jujubee, though. As much as Juju is my girl, I would have probably eliminated her first.
I dunno, though. My opinion was that Pandora was the best queen overall (and not just because of the rampant "show me your boxx" jokes), but she had two things working against her:
1) Her age - she's 37; the other queens are in their 20's (hell, Tyra's 21 and Juju's my age).
2) More importantly - I think one of the things pointed out earlier in the competition was that she's more camp comedy, and I think Ru's looking more for someone who will confuse straight guys. Which is fine, but...like, I dunno, I may have thought Ru was a hot chick when I was 13 and confused, but now that I'm more settled in my ways I'm not really into sultry seductress queens. WE ALL KNOW IT'S A GAY MAN UNDER THE WIG, THE CHICKEN CUTLETS, AND THE ASS PADDING. MYSTIQUE IS EXEMPT FROM THE LAST TWO SINCE SHE HAS T&A TO SPARE THEY KNOW THEY'RE GAY MEN UNDER THE WIG, THE CHICKEN CUTLETS, AND THE ASS PADDING.
Hell, even if Ru makes a better-looking woman than he does a man (and truth be told, RuPaul is a handsome guy even if he is Botoxed to hell), we love him because he's funny and plays up the humor inherent in a guy dressed up as a woman. And at the humor game, I think Pandora wins hands-down. (At least on the intentional front. On the unintentional front, there's stiff competition from...nearly everyone else. Especially Tyra.)
That said: I AM SO GLAD THAT RAVEN WON, THOUGH. TATIANNA TOTALLY GOT SHOWN UP. YES.
It was really a Solomon's Choice, though. I think my alliances are clear in terms of who I favor, but other than Tati (who - to my disappointment - did not fuck it up this week), I don't know who I'd get rid of. Possibly Tyra - although she has bestowed numerous gifts on us (I mean, she is like the drag version of Dr. Evil with the entire Destiny's Child anthology on his iPod), I'm beginning to tire of her. But if you'd asked me to choose between Raven, Juju, and Pandora, I'd probably ask if death were an option.