"The empires may fall, and the seas may rise but I'll be at your side by and by"
Been a week. One of my near and dear friends turned brother, Jasper, realized his father was dying of dementia. He said there is a 50/50 shot that he might have it and if he does have it then he will likely die within 6 years and not have kids or get married because he doesn't want to put them through that. I keep trying to tell him that being colder is not being more moral, that if people choose to stick around let them.
That would be the third of my friends that have been given 5 years to live. I hope their spirits and bodies are strong. I hope they stick around a bit longer.
At least none of them smell like blood yet, blood so thick that it threatens to drown us all.
I'm slowing down time, trying to value every moment of this summer that I have while they are all still around. I don't know who I will be after Jasper and Pandora go, they both were so fundamental to making me who I am. They shaped me, taught me to dance and fight, and I still don't know what they saw in me that made them think I was capable of being so bold. Clearly they were right, but they had no reason to think so. Ap is a new friend but seems to have seen something similar, looked into my eyes and decided we would be friends because they saw , if I may quote them, a fire burning there. No clue what that means, I cannot look into my own eyes in the same way.
So I am trying to pick up my head, not become consumed with mourning them before they are even gone and spoiling what time I have with them. So much can change in five years, especially if I make a conscious choice to slow time down. If I do that right I can at least maximize the times we have, something to hold on to.
Feeling a touch better now, but tis been a week of this.
That would be the third of my friends that have been given 5 years to live. I hope their spirits and bodies are strong. I hope they stick around a bit longer.
At least none of them smell like blood yet, blood so thick that it threatens to drown us all.
I'm slowing down time, trying to value every moment of this summer that I have while they are all still around. I don't know who I will be after Jasper and Pandora go, they both were so fundamental to making me who I am. They shaped me, taught me to dance and fight, and I still don't know what they saw in me that made them think I was capable of being so bold. Clearly they were right, but they had no reason to think so. Ap is a new friend but seems to have seen something similar, looked into my eyes and decided we would be friends because they saw , if I may quote them, a fire burning there. No clue what that means, I cannot look into my own eyes in the same way.
So I am trying to pick up my head, not become consumed with mourning them before they are even gone and spoiling what time I have with them. So much can change in five years, especially if I make a conscious choice to slow time down. If I do that right I can at least maximize the times we have, something to hold on to.
Feeling a touch better now, but tis been a week of this.