...

[i_like_sauce]

i think that's going to be the deal from now on, updating when the year is allllmost up but not quite. I have about a month until med school starts, less than that if counting the week of orientation. people ask me are you excited and i feel like i can't give them the answer they want to hear...i want to say yes, i've got goosebumps, i'm going to get that much closer to my goal. that's a lie though...i'm not excited, i'll always be excited at the eventual outcome (becoming the doctor) but the road...not so much. leaving everyone with the likely possibility that i will see them maybe once a month if i'm lucky is not exactly what i signed up for. then i think, it is time for me to grow up, not completely of course but just more. i will always be the person who's life is controlled by school with whatever time is left spent on her friends...
i guess it's time for me to deal with it, maybe the white coat ceremony will help me get excited...hahha.
on hte other hand, my dad told me the reason i don't have a boyfriend is because i'm too picky, if i include everything my mother's told me then the official reasons i don't have a significant other right now is:
i'm too picky
i don't act dumb enough
i don't act girly enough

...damn