These thoughts are incomplete, but they always will be.

Oct 07, 2007 01:32

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Main:The older I get, the less time I spend happy ( Read more... )

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stars_in_return October 7 2007, 16:57:48 UTC
Could you go more into the responsibility thing? What are you responsible for that makes you unhappy?

I know that I want to make a home with someone someday. Right now I don't know when the idea of being in a relationship will feel right, and that's ok. It's strange. I used to want to be polyamorous some years ago but not anymore. So many things have changed and I have learned so much. Love is confusing. The way you have defined it here makes sense. It is complicated but it doesn't have to be overly complicated. If you had eight relationships in the past year that collapsed, that's pretty complicated. Did you take on that many at one time? Maybe that is why they collapsed. That's part of why I stopped trying to do many at a time.

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i_am_the_owl October 7 2007, 19:16:59 UTC
Did you read the entry?

I said I'm less unhappy and that I've seen eight relationships collapse.

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stars_in_return October 8 2007, 02:17:03 UTC
Yes, and I've re-read it just to make sure. Well it's good that you weren't trying to be in eight relationships! I misread that part. I've seen a few very successful relationships this year. People bring it on themselves how it turns out. You started with saying the older you get the less time you spend happy. Not happy, adequately satisfied. But you're less unhappy, you now say. You know how you feel.

Can you answer the question about responsibility?

I wanted to talk with you about your drone complaint, preferably not here.

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i_am_the_owl October 8 2007, 04:57:10 UTC
I also said "less unhappy" in the entry too. Less happy and less unhappy, but more time adequately satisfied.

So, no, I can't answer it because it doesn't make sense given that I didn't ever talk about being responsible for unhappiness.

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stars_in_return October 8 2007, 12:00:58 UTC
Not that, I was trying to figure out why you think responsibility is the driving force for squelching happiness. Do you give up being happy with anything and just pick one thing, like success?

I like how you have the love thing all calculated out in percentages. Does the amount of time that a relationship experience lasts account for the amount of impact? For me, it sure does not. An experience can last minutes and impact a person for years. Have you ever loved without thinking about whether or not you'll spend the rest of your life with the person? Have you never experienced a long lasting joy? Too many questions? :P

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i_am_the_owl October 8 2007, 16:11:24 UTC
Because the more responsibility you have, the less time you have to pursue things for the sheer pleasure of it. Rather, your time is filled with fulfilling your responsibility and, thus, satisfaction.

Not directly, but it's impossible to account for that. Thus, an average must be assumed. The idea that a few minutes can impact your life is nice and all, but it's generally overromanticized and unrealistic. Yes, of course I've thought about that, but knowing love isn't going to last makes the maintenance of that relationship less of a priority. Long lasting joy is generally known as "euphoria" and it's generally chemically induced.

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stars_in_return October 9 2007, 22:53:17 UTC
Why can't your responsibility include pleasure? Ok, I think I understand, you just don't consider pleasure part of your responsibility? Well I hope you really are satisfied. Sometimes I have to put my pleasures on hold when they're less important, but if I deny them for too long I'll get sad and have to declare it priority, because pleasure feels good and that's important (to me ( ... )

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i_am_the_owl October 10 2007, 15:00:46 UTC
I really don't care if you agree with me or not.

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stars_in_return October 10 2007, 15:09:32 UTC
I see.

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i_am_the_owl October 11 2007, 01:43:49 UTC
It's just that I don't particularly care to argue over the particulars between romanticized ideology versus practical experience and rationale.

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stars_in_return October 12 2007, 15:28:30 UTC
That's ok. Just wanted to share a different angle.

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