i have no job. i'm not in school. i have no band. i have no girlfriend. i have no pets. i'm not training jiu-jitsu.

i have lots of stuff i'm selling on ebay, stuff i'll give away, including furniture, lamps, and a peace lily.

i think i'll start from scratch in hawai'i. i still want what i wanted in october, minus the dog and cat.

i don't think i want to be a CNA.

i think i want to teach english 100 at KCC, and live in a cottage in kaimuki or kapahulu, train jiu-jitsu, swim at kaimana at sunrise and/or sunset. and have a cat. and maybe a dog. drive a prius. i think that would be the life for me.

but that means getting a BA and an MA.

i'm becoming more conservative as i get older. i figure i'll be a republican by 40.

while walking home after closing at the restaurant i called my folks' home. my family was out except for my grandma. she'll be 89 soon. somewhere in our conversation she talked about hoping to live long enough to see my 14-year-old sister graduate high school. tears flowed and i held back my shakey voice. i was silently bawling while walking ( Read more... )

when i was around three i had a vinyl toy scorpion with a suction cup. my aunty from maui was in town. she bought the toy from a vending machine at ruger market when we were there. in the car my dad stuck the toy scorpion on the inside of the window. i was hypnotized. we had a picnic at kaimana beach with the rest of my family. i buried my scorpion ( Read more... )

i'm lying on the mattress-padded futon. the sheet is balled up next to my bed on a pile of clean clothes. on the other side of the bed is a stack of books i hadn't finish reading that i listed on amazon marketplace. i also have a cracked lamp, shards on the carpet. my peace lily sits dead on a square wooden stool. i hear flight of the concords in ( Read more... )