drugs and alcohol

May 03, 2013 02:46

Pondering how people use drugs as coping mechanisms. I know just about everyone does it in some fashion or another. Every single teatotaler I know is addicted to adrenaline.

Point related to my life, I am pretty sure I have been using alcohol(in part) to blunt other people's perceptions of my energy. I decided to do an experiment by not drinking anything for a while. I went to a party last night. I dressed to the nines, heels and all. It was awesome. I was my crazy open bubbly self. I left feeling great. No alcohol.

I think part of my ability to do that is that I have found a community where it is safe for me to be me and not only is that ok, they will protect me and have my back. I'm not really like them but they aren't really like each other either so it seems to work out ok. I like that *we* are a group of remarkably different individuals who all agree that our right to be who we are is the thing that we want to protect.

A friend of mine wrote a while back about being a primary psychic vampire. She seems to think I am one as well. I think I disagree slightly. I know I feed off of other people but I think what I need is not general energy or negative energy that people need to get rid of. I think I feed on sensual and sexual energy like a succubus. Just a hunch.

At Rog's wedding
feathernscale said, "She doesn't need alcohol. She is like that all on her own." Its a true statement. I like alcohol. But I don't need it. Good things to know about oneself.

Peace.

X-posted to DW

self discovery

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