(no subject)
Yeah, I do read it, as I'm sure you read mine. I don't know. At least on my part, the animosity is gone. I don't hate you. And there are things about you and memories we have that I miss so ridiculously much. But I know I'm happy with my life, and I know you are too. I truly am sorry that it has to be this way. That to be better people, happier people, we have to never speak. (Or is that just something I tell myself to get away with what I've done?)
I know I hurt you. And did things I shouldn't have. And I'm sorry for those things. I'm not crazy. I just do things knowing I shouldn't do them, and then regret them later. And frankly, even though that may not be what you do, most people do it. Its human nature. But I'm not trying to point fingers or anything, or tell you why I'm right. I'm just trying to make you understand that I do see the wrong in what I do.
I do miss arlo, by the way...
On other notes...
School is eh. I'm growing more fond of it. I hate my history class...but thats just cause the guy is monotonous and talks and talks talks for 3 hours straight. Not to mention the fact that I hate history classes. My other classes are alright. I actually enjoy them. And I've made friends in them...friends that make the time go by faster. I haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate parking during the day though. When Allyson's sister came and talked to us about how hard parking was to find...and how you had to like, follow people to their car just to get a spot, I thought she was crazy. (I had only gone during the night, and 4 out of my 5 classes are night classes) But when I went to school at 10:30 tuesday morning, I thought I was going to die before I found a goddamn parking spot. Its ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. And you really do have to follow people to their cars. I feel bad...Like I'm stalking them. haha
My new job at the daycare is wonderful. Time goes by fast, and I get an hour lunch (something i've never had)...And I love all my babies. And I get to be with Amalia all the time.
I need my financial aid. The cost of books is absolutely outrageous. I haven't even bought my biology book because I'm in the midst of trying to buy a car and sooo can't afford $105 right now. Ugh. Way too damn expensive. I bought my psychology book online though...it was only $27. I'm not sure how much it is in the bookstore, but I'm sure I paid a helluva lot less.
So the car thing. I'm trying to buy April's car. And its getting difficult because my dad has muuuch less than perfect credit. So his mom's cosigning. But then she's gonna get a loan for less interest on her own because she has peeeerfect credit. And then we're going to use her loan to pay off the loan that she's cosigning on. Craziness...But we still have to see if we got the loan in the first place. Ugh. My head hurts from all of that, so I'm moving on.
I hate guys. I really do. Is it just me, or is sex alllllll they want? Like, I know I'm a slut...but every single guy that messages me on myspace wont date me. All they want is sex. And its not like my myspace says "hey come have sex with me...cause I'm a whore and i will"....its nothing like that. As far as I can see, the only slutty thing on there is the boob picture. Ugh. I'm not asking for the most perfect guy in the world, or even to fall in love. I just wanna go out on a date. And be all giddy again, because I think some guy is as interested in me and I am in him.
FUCK GUYS. REALLY. FUCK THEM.
Okay. Well I think thats it for now. Bye loves.
I know I hurt you. And did things I shouldn't have. And I'm sorry for those things. I'm not crazy. I just do things knowing I shouldn't do them, and then regret them later. And frankly, even though that may not be what you do, most people do it. Its human nature. But I'm not trying to point fingers or anything, or tell you why I'm right. I'm just trying to make you understand that I do see the wrong in what I do.
I do miss arlo, by the way...
On other notes...
School is eh. I'm growing more fond of it. I hate my history class...but thats just cause the guy is monotonous and talks and talks talks for 3 hours straight. Not to mention the fact that I hate history classes. My other classes are alright. I actually enjoy them. And I've made friends in them...friends that make the time go by faster. I haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaate parking during the day though. When Allyson's sister came and talked to us about how hard parking was to find...and how you had to like, follow people to their car just to get a spot, I thought she was crazy. (I had only gone during the night, and 4 out of my 5 classes are night classes) But when I went to school at 10:30 tuesday morning, I thought I was going to die before I found a goddamn parking spot. Its ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. And you really do have to follow people to their cars. I feel bad...Like I'm stalking them. haha
My new job at the daycare is wonderful. Time goes by fast, and I get an hour lunch (something i've never had)...And I love all my babies. And I get to be with Amalia all the time.
I need my financial aid. The cost of books is absolutely outrageous. I haven't even bought my biology book because I'm in the midst of trying to buy a car and sooo can't afford $105 right now. Ugh. Way too damn expensive. I bought my psychology book online though...it was only $27. I'm not sure how much it is in the bookstore, but I'm sure I paid a helluva lot less.
So the car thing. I'm trying to buy April's car. And its getting difficult because my dad has muuuch less than perfect credit. So his mom's cosigning. But then she's gonna get a loan for less interest on her own because she has peeeerfect credit. And then we're going to use her loan to pay off the loan that she's cosigning on. Craziness...But we still have to see if we got the loan in the first place. Ugh. My head hurts from all of that, so I'm moving on.
I hate guys. I really do. Is it just me, or is sex alllllll they want? Like, I know I'm a slut...but every single guy that messages me on myspace wont date me. All they want is sex. And its not like my myspace says "hey come have sex with me...cause I'm a whore and i will"....its nothing like that. As far as I can see, the only slutty thing on there is the boob picture. Ugh. I'm not asking for the most perfect guy in the world, or even to fall in love. I just wanna go out on a date. And be all giddy again, because I think some guy is as interested in me and I am in him.
FUCK GUYS. REALLY. FUCK THEM.
Okay. Well I think thats it for now. Bye loves.