sweet sixteen and a love for orange range
i haven't updated in here forever, it's an absolute travesty!
i miss being on here, typing my thoughts out and reading yours. i have been irresponsible and have neglected this aspect of livejournal - and after pushing myself to commit to something that was so big in my life only last year, and a few years back from tenth grade in high school it'd be a mistake to lose this. i've met some fantastic people on here, even persuaded a few to join and it'd be terrible to let it all go because i had writers block, or i was afraid to let my thoughts out into the public sphere again since december last year when it leaked out that my thoughts were being critiqued and judged by those whom i believed were relative acquaintences, perhaps even strangers. .....anyhow....
i was going to type 4eva as opposed to forever, and if i did i guess i'd be wearing white knee-high socks, black ballet flats, a plaid skirt & tie with a glossy patent tote with keyrings and cute chains of kitties, bunnies and other sparkly pink things. i'd be sitting in front of my computer frantically checking facebook to see if he's replied, and giggling when he does - even if all he's bothered to say is, "yeah cool" when you asked him to meet you after school tuesday.
two words, yeah + cool can turn into a two hour mental dissection with girlfriends on the train over:
oh my god, he said "yeah!"
oh my god!
HE WANTS TO SEE ME!
what does he mean by cool?
does that mean he really wants to see me?
i mean he wouldn't say cool if he doesn't right?
oh my god, he wants to see me?!
he does right?
oh my god!
and then it turns towards his hair, "i lurve his hair, it's so cute you know the way it just sticks up....i mean it looks like he just woke up you know like a bedhead but it's so adorable", even though two months ago you thought it looked ridiculous.
god i miss those days when a relationship can occur because you both liked orange range, asian kung fu generation, the same easyway tea combination and walks on the beach and liking those things could constitute a potential lifetime of marital bliss.
these days, how can one think about a boy being a potential life partner let alone a boyfriend if he hates orange range, has bleached autumn gold hair, works part-time at a chinese roast bbq restaurant downtown, aimless, has earrings & can't drive?!
when you're sixteen and spending your evenings at the movies and on the phone as long as he called you, looked cute in his school uniform, took you out for dinner and gave you roses on valentine's day he was the best boyfriend in the world, future hubby, together forever!
are our stakes too high, like the height of the next season's power pumps?
(now i sound like samantha brett - blonde bombshell carrie bradshaw wannabe)
and honestly, as long as he loves me even when i talk over the phone like i have a tampon up my butt, drinks more almond milk teas than i can afford and having to bludge money off him for a train fare, him driving me to maccas for supper because my day sucked and laughing at my silly jokes. i wouldn't care if he's not becoming a history lecturer, or an aeronautical engineer. maybe he wants to become a physiotherapist, and a cartoon artist? so maybe he does. does that mean i would have to love him any less? if he did, if he had... having bleached autumn gold hair would be a definate plus, maybe he'd let me dye it for him. maybe maybe maybe.
p.s. i think i might write some friends only personal entries in here - sometimes life gets a bit messy and i need to vent out on more than my mother and a depency on soap operas.
i miss being on here, typing my thoughts out and reading yours. i have been irresponsible and have neglected this aspect of livejournal - and after pushing myself to commit to something that was so big in my life only last year, and a few years back from tenth grade in high school it'd be a mistake to lose this. i've met some fantastic people on here, even persuaded a few to join and it'd be terrible to let it all go because i had writers block, or i was afraid to let my thoughts out into the public sphere again since december last year when it leaked out that my thoughts were being critiqued and judged by those whom i believed were relative acquaintences, perhaps even strangers. .....anyhow....
i was going to type 4eva as opposed to forever, and if i did i guess i'd be wearing white knee-high socks, black ballet flats, a plaid skirt & tie with a glossy patent tote with keyrings and cute chains of kitties, bunnies and other sparkly pink things. i'd be sitting in front of my computer frantically checking facebook to see if he's replied, and giggling when he does - even if all he's bothered to say is, "yeah cool" when you asked him to meet you after school tuesday.
two words, yeah + cool can turn into a two hour mental dissection with girlfriends on the train over:
oh my god, he said "yeah!"
oh my god!
HE WANTS TO SEE ME!
what does he mean by cool?
does that mean he really wants to see me?
i mean he wouldn't say cool if he doesn't right?
oh my god, he wants to see me?!
he does right?
oh my god!
and then it turns towards his hair, "i lurve his hair, it's so cute you know the way it just sticks up....i mean it looks like he just woke up you know like a bedhead but it's so adorable", even though two months ago you thought it looked ridiculous.
god i miss those days when a relationship can occur because you both liked orange range, asian kung fu generation, the same easyway tea combination and walks on the beach and liking those things could constitute a potential lifetime of marital bliss.
these days, how can one think about a boy being a potential life partner let alone a boyfriend if he hates orange range, has bleached autumn gold hair, works part-time at a chinese roast bbq restaurant downtown, aimless, has earrings & can't drive?!
when you're sixteen and spending your evenings at the movies and on the phone as long as he called you, looked cute in his school uniform, took you out for dinner and gave you roses on valentine's day he was the best boyfriend in the world, future hubby, together forever!
are our stakes too high, like the height of the next season's power pumps?
(now i sound like samantha brett - blonde bombshell carrie bradshaw wannabe)
and honestly, as long as he loves me even when i talk over the phone like i have a tampon up my butt, drinks more almond milk teas than i can afford and having to bludge money off him for a train fare, him driving me to maccas for supper because my day sucked and laughing at my silly jokes. i wouldn't care if he's not becoming a history lecturer, or an aeronautical engineer. maybe he wants to become a physiotherapist, and a cartoon artist? so maybe he does. does that mean i would have to love him any less? if he did, if he had... having bleached autumn gold hair would be a definate plus, maybe he'd let me dye it for him. maybe maybe maybe.
p.s. i think i might write some friends only personal entries in here - sometimes life gets a bit messy and i need to vent out on more than my mother and a depency on soap operas.