Comments | hp_random: Bi-Weekly Challenge: Milholland quote.

r_moony in hp_random

Bi-Weekly Challenge: Milholland quote.

Apr 11, 2008 19:02

Who: Remus Lupin
What: Our heroes are people and people are flawed. Don't let that taint the thing you love. -Randy K. Milholland
Where: Hogwarts
When: Now, in grownhp6words timeline after this.
Why: One, because he himself is piecing things together. Two, because it's Remus. And Moony. And like they ever let their children leave without responding ( Read more... )

dora tonks lupin, maisie lupin, owl, remus lupin, fic, hogwarts, grownhp

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pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 06:00:50 UTC

Tonks had just completed her shift - but couldn't go home without checking the infirmary first.

She was sitting on a bed as close to Nikola's as they would let her, just watching things going on, exhausted. She knew she needed to go home, but...

This could have been me. This should have been me.

Bill Weasley's wounds hadn't happened too recently, but the sight of Sebastian's exposed flesh when she had seen it hadn't left her wondering too long what kind of attacker had accosted him. And it was her who had chosen to associate with them, wasn't it?

Merlin, I'm tired...

She wearily rose and walked out, and almost ran into her husband.

Even this tired, she could tell something was wrong. Very wrong.

"Remus?" Her voice was quiet, almost hollow. It was all she could master right now.

r_moony April 12 2008, 07:21:56 UTC

Of course it had to be the infirmary, Remus thought to himself even if his expression betrayed nothing. He really didn't want to do this. Bring news that their daughter had left.

He should have seen the signs, he kept thinking. He should have asked her sooner. He should have noticed. He should have--

"Maisie left."

His voice was soft. Calm, even if inside he was anything but. At least he wasn't throwing books like he had done when Scorpius had left; he just handed her the note.

pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 07:37:53 UTC

"What?" Tonks felt the parchment between her fingers, but her mind was...

Somehow, she recalled where she was and finished going out of the infirmary and into the nearest empty classroom, collapsing in a seat, before she allowed herself to think. Or read.

But read she did. The first time through, it didn't make any sense. So she read it again. And again.

Her joy-filled, strawberry-bright baby girl. Hers. Whatever else, that wouldn't, couldn't change. Why...

She wasn't fully aware if Remus had followed her, but the words rolled out of her mouth anyway, quiet, strained. "You weren't there with her, that night." It had always been about them running together. Not being alone. "She was all on her own." And since then too. Remus had not told her what had happened. If she'd known... She'd not have left Maisie struggle with things alone. Remus was obviously preoccupied himself, but if she'd known, she could have helped. But she wasn't told.

Secrets and lies. Bloody brilliant...

r_moony April 12 2008, 08:02:03 UTC

Remus had indeed followed her, and he caught every tone and every word.

"No, I was not with her."

Why he was answering when she hadn't even asked he had no idea.

"She was on her own, yes. I didn't--... I left her alone that night."

pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 08:07:19 UTC

Her face turned towards his voice, but she wasn't sure she was seeing him. Everything was blurry suddenly, but she was too tired to cry. Too tired to be angry. Too tired. She didn't know what to do.

I don't know enough to know what I can do.

The question was simple. It was spoken without force. But things had gotten too far without an answer to it.

"What happened?"

r_moony April 12 2008, 08:15:12 UTC

Blank.

That was all he felt. That was all he portrayed. Just blank, because anything else was not an option.

Secrets and lies? Heh. This was just the tip of the iceberg.

He wasn't in a good mood. He was edgy beyond belief thanks to the blood he could still smell, and that he had just been exposed to since she had been in the infirmary. She even smelled of it as well. He was stressed, sleep deprived and his child had gone off somewhere where he wasn't expected to reach her.

Not a good mood? Scratch that, he was in a terrible, horrible mood.

But that was the bad thing about just giving off a blank expression, wasn't it? For others to see what was behind all that was impossible.

"You read what happened. We each ran off in different directions."

pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 08:21:49 UTC

"That isn't everything. That doesn't explain your absence for almost month. Nor the fact that this, happening with our own daughter, seems to evoke less of an emotion than what Scorpius did, and I know you better than just accepting that." Tonks blinked away the tears and fought, fought hard to clear her mind.

"This is our daughter, Remus. This is our family. This is my life too. I chose it, but I need to know what is going on so I can understand and try to make things better, since they don't seem to be fixing themselves--" and you don't seem to be able to fix them. "What. Happened?"

r_moony April 12 2008, 08:52:12 UTC

If one Harry James Potter were to be in the room, he would warn Tonks that she might be getting hexed in a matter of seconds just by the look on his face. That look, that was eerily similar to the one that he had had twenty-nine years ago in Grimmauld Place. The look that said he had reached the end of his damn rope and was done.

But before he talked or said anything else, he used his wand to lock the door and secure the room so no one passing the halls would hear.

"I know this is our daughter. I am very well aware of it, and I also know that things are not fixing themselves. I did not tell you because you cannot fix this. NO ONE can fix this, and you cannot understandHe was pacing, silent for only a brief moment before he turned to her. His tone was no longer barely hanging onto control; now it was harder and louder than it had been ( ... )

pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 09:19:54 UTC

Her wand was out and she reinforced the lock on that door. She wasn't done with him ( ... )

r_moony April 12 2008, 09:44:04 UTC

How the door kept standing he didn't know, because the emotional magic that was radiating right off of him could have blasted the poor thing right off its hinges. The waves of anger were rolling right through him, and when he heard the lock being reinforced he tensed. He tensed far more than what he already was, and a humorless chuckle escaped his lips.

Bad idea, Dora, he thought as he turned to her. Bad bloody idea.

She wanted emotion? Fine, she could see it displayed so clearly in his eyes and his features now. The point wasn't to make her afraid, so whether she was or not he didn't care at all. There were very few things he cared about, at the moment. Arguing like this was not one of them, but if this was what she wanted then he was not backing down. He was so used to hiding what he felt, and what he thought, but when he was as angry as he was at the moment...

"You really think that you would understand if I explained? You. can't. The only way you can is if you were to see the madness - the REAL MADNESS, not what peeks through ( ... )

pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 10:12:35 UTC

Her voice, surprisingly, was still calm, though a lot more tense. Perhaps it was a bad idea. But the other options were just worse.

"I told you want I want. I want to know what happened. Why is that hard to understand?" Why is it so hard to speak it? Stubborn, Dora? Never! Sane? Only occasionally.

"We all have our own brands of madness, Remus. The fact that yours is different doesn't make you that special. What you do about it does. Think about that. Act on it, if you choose to."

Tonks sighed softly. "I do not accept defeat. Not where people I love are hurting. If the potion, and running, and togetherness aren't helping, we will find another way. I know it won't ever be perfectly safe. But we can work some way to stop it from being... this complicated in the future. Don't focus on the problem. Think of the solution"You're busy enough trying to help yourself. Share the burden. Sometimes you can deal this on your own - and sometimes you don't have to. Not wanting help doesn't mean you don't need it. Or that you won't get it if you ( ... )

r_moony April 12 2008, 10:19:01 UTC

Act on it, if he chose to...

Right.

Remus just stared at her, the muscle in his jaw still twitching, until a moment later he simply turned and walked out of the room.

pinkhairedauror April 12 2008, 10:25:48 UTC

Tonks winced, and then sobbed once, the tears not coming back, but... she didn't follow.

Tell me, Dora, I promise I will comply. That part had... scared her, a little. Because it wasn't about HER. It was about HIM. And saying that he'd do what she wanted him felt so wrong. At least walking out was... his choice. What he wanted to do. Not something he though she wanted.

She closed the door so she could hear anybody coming in, just in case, then took a quill and parchment to write back to Maisie.

She hoped she'd be able to understand, later. Eventually.

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