doctor doctor!
i hope everyone had a pleasant friday the 13th, october. i nearly died. not only was it incredibly creepy that i started my "monthly" that mo(u)rning. but it was also the most painful thing i have ever felt . so i smoked a little weed cause that usually helps anything. but nothing. drank a little, it seems to work for jacob. but also nothing. finally jacob's friend hooked me up with a strong vicoden pill, and i was sooo desperate by then... but i still only took half. the pill seemed to only make things worse since i was sort of stoned and drunk. it mostly enhanced my high and focused all that energy on my violently painful cramps. i threw up a few times and then jacob took me home and took care of me. i could tell he was getting uneasy since there wasn't much he could do to help. but he did. and i love him and i'm very grateful for him. he made it a bit mrore tolerable. but geez it was the longest day too cause i couldn't even go to sleep, it was that bad. i didn't leave the house. fuck you know, i thought i was giving birth to satan himself. worst day of my life. ever. hope yours was better. i'm lucky to be alive.
i just hope i don't turn into a tragic excorcist case.
saturday things got better for me. and we brought almost all thats left of jacob's stuff down. it just furniture thats left really. we're probly goin to move in at the end of this week. he got two jobs and i feel like i hardly see him anymore. i mean i do, i know i do. but we've been practically joined at the hip for the past two months. i don't know. i just need to get used to it i guess.
other than a few unusual& possibly unhealthy physical oddities and pains.
all is well.
oh and have you heard, its the end of the world.
i believe it.
&i'm so fucking ready for it.
take it easy.