Everything Comes to an End Sooner or Later!
It's funny how life can be full of surprises.
Thanksgiving within itself was pleasant. I enjoyed seeing my family and friends. I miss them. I can't wait to get back to enjoy life with them. Happiness and love is all i've ever asked for. Is that too much? To me, it isn't. Others it seem to be.
Sean and I broke up ummm like 4 days ago or so, i dunno. People change. Things are always presented the best. The 22nd was two months for us. Two months spent and now gone. Before Sean, i really hadn't dated dated someone. It had been a little over a year, till him. You know how ya pray for something and ask God to bless you with that special something? Well, that's what i did. Sean seemed to have been placed in my life at the most perfect time. He and I are only 12 days apart, we are both nursing major's, will start in the program around the same time, etc. I just don't think he and i are searching/looking for the same thing. But, it just amazes me how it takes dating, etc. for two months to figure that out. What a waste of time, huh? I just want that special someone to come into my life and love me with all of his heart and soul. Is that so wrong? Love is such a great gift. And i cherish love with all of my heart. I desire it and want it so bad. Maybe, that's my problem.. I dunno.
For some reason i take relationships to heart. The person i am dating is someone i want to spend quality time together, enjoy life together, and share feelings. Someone i want to cuddle with and watch a movie, the person i want to cook with and share memories with, the person i would like to carry a conversation with about what goes on in mine and his life. Is that so horribly wrong? I don't want drama, i don't want someone who is there for just sex, and i don't want someone who doesn't want to spend time with me. I'm not asking "ALL" your time, but a portion of it. I assume we both have goals in life, friends, and family that deserve other portions of each of our time. :-)
The first three or so days of our break-up hurt me. I'm not saying i don't think about him still, cause i would be lying. He still crosses my mind. And i think about how next semester could have been so great with one another in our life's. Just the normal stuff. My stomach was awfully sick. My emotions and heart was broken. I didn't understand some things. I was in questioning. Vomiting, not eating much at all, etc. Stuff that you can't help. I know... 2 months isn't that long.. I agree. I've been in MUCH longer relationships.. over 7 months, over a yr, etc. Funny how i fell for this person in such a short length of time, 2 months. It amazes me everyday, cause i don't fall easy for people. But i did. It's over and done with. I began to love him. Feelings on my part had started to develop. You try and hold them back, fight them, and pray to God not to let ya fall this quickly and easy.. But it happens anywayzz.. Nothing you can do. Love hurts. Love is good, but hurts. Heartbroken and so forth. But, i've learned a lot. All i can do is go on with my life and try to take care of Chris. I have family and friends that love me dearly. That would do anything for me. What more could you ask for? But it's hard.... Cause sometimes i feel i wasn't given the opportunity to share and express my love for him. I honestly still think he and i could have or had a great relationship, etc. I think that's what hurts the most. I've done my part. I've shared my heart, my thoughts, and of course my feelings. Nothing more to do. Some may say wait and be patient.. I do believe in being patient and waiting for things. But, there are other things that aren't meant to be waited on. But it's because of those things that we can pick ourselves up and move on and enjoy life. Ughh.. Why does my stomach start turning and feeling sick and i start shaking when talking about this? Oh well.. I can't talk about this anymore..
Thanksgiving within itself was pleasant. I enjoyed seeing my family and friends. I miss them. I can't wait to get back to enjoy life with them. Happiness and love is all i've ever asked for. Is that too much? To me, it isn't. Others it seem to be.
Sean and I broke up ummm like 4 days ago or so, i dunno. People change. Things are always presented the best. The 22nd was two months for us. Two months spent and now gone. Before Sean, i really hadn't dated dated someone. It had been a little over a year, till him. You know how ya pray for something and ask God to bless you with that special something? Well, that's what i did. Sean seemed to have been placed in my life at the most perfect time. He and I are only 12 days apart, we are both nursing major's, will start in the program around the same time, etc. I just don't think he and i are searching/looking for the same thing. But, it just amazes me how it takes dating, etc. for two months to figure that out. What a waste of time, huh? I just want that special someone to come into my life and love me with all of his heart and soul. Is that so wrong? Love is such a great gift. And i cherish love with all of my heart. I desire it and want it so bad. Maybe, that's my problem.. I dunno.
For some reason i take relationships to heart. The person i am dating is someone i want to spend quality time together, enjoy life together, and share feelings. Someone i want to cuddle with and watch a movie, the person i want to cook with and share memories with, the person i would like to carry a conversation with about what goes on in mine and his life. Is that so horribly wrong? I don't want drama, i don't want someone who is there for just sex, and i don't want someone who doesn't want to spend time with me. I'm not asking "ALL" your time, but a portion of it. I assume we both have goals in life, friends, and family that deserve other portions of each of our time. :-)
The first three or so days of our break-up hurt me. I'm not saying i don't think about him still, cause i would be lying. He still crosses my mind. And i think about how next semester could have been so great with one another in our life's. Just the normal stuff. My stomach was awfully sick. My emotions and heart was broken. I didn't understand some things. I was in questioning. Vomiting, not eating much at all, etc. Stuff that you can't help. I know... 2 months isn't that long.. I agree. I've been in MUCH longer relationships.. over 7 months, over a yr, etc. Funny how i fell for this person in such a short length of time, 2 months. It amazes me everyday, cause i don't fall easy for people. But i did. It's over and done with. I began to love him. Feelings on my part had started to develop. You try and hold them back, fight them, and pray to God not to let ya fall this quickly and easy.. But it happens anywayzz.. Nothing you can do. Love hurts. Love is good, but hurts. Heartbroken and so forth. But, i've learned a lot. All i can do is go on with my life and try to take care of Chris. I have family and friends that love me dearly. That would do anything for me. What more could you ask for? But it's hard.... Cause sometimes i feel i wasn't given the opportunity to share and express my love for him. I honestly still think he and i could have or had a great relationship, etc. I think that's what hurts the most. I've done my part. I've shared my heart, my thoughts, and of course my feelings. Nothing more to do. Some may say wait and be patient.. I do believe in being patient and waiting for things. But, there are other things that aren't meant to be waited on. But it's because of those things that we can pick ourselves up and move on and enjoy life. Ughh.. Why does my stomach start turning and feeling sick and i start shaking when talking about this? Oh well.. I can't talk about this anymore..