I am so conflicted right now on what to do. Tomorrow afternoon I am going into work and I do not know what to do. 50% of me doesn't want to loose my job, but the other part of me does. I really do not like working there. Wednesday morning I am meeting with Hope, Lee Anne's boss at JCC and hopefully I'll be working there at the preschool. But I won' ( Read more... )

I am so damn frustrated with getting these damn transcripts from UofL and MTSU. I finally got the one transcript from UofL and now I'm working on MTSU. Apparently there were two holds on my account. Both are exit interviews. But they failed to tell me that. So I did one online and they are sending me the forms for the 2nd one so I can send those ( Read more... )

I've decided to start writing on this again. I was just reading some older posts and they are a bit disturbing. I know no one reads these damn entries, and I'm okay with it. The way I write and talk in these entries kind of reminds me of the book The Perks of being a Wallflower. How Charlie writes letters to this random person about his life and ( Read more... )

I can't control my thoughts anymore. My mind is in a million and one places. Its in the past, present and future. I am slowly driving myself crazy. No drive. No will power. Nothing. I'm dead inside. My heart beats to a different rhythm than my body. And there is no synchronizing the two. Two bodies, two beats, never together ( Read more... )

I absolutely hate dreams that seem so real that you wake up and think "Did that really happen?" Because I had that dream last night. And of course it was about Chasitiy. I just wish I could be over her. But part of me is scared to be over her, because I'm afraid that when I finally do get over her, she'll want me and I won't want her. That right ( Read more... )

This weekend was so much fun. Went to Murfreesboro to see my friends and took Kasey with me and I swear it was one of the best weekends I've had in a long time. I probably spent too much money, but it was all worth it ( Read more... )

*eat less
*don't use UofL credit card
*go to work when scheduled
*go to class when scheduled
*be happy

wow-i hope this works.
i can do it. i can i can i can.

i hope.

its all coming back now. i was an idiot and stopped taking my medicine. i thought i felt better and that my life was better; i was wrong. no one told me that it wasnt alright to just stop taking my medicine. i thought i'd be okay. but im not. my thoughts, feelings, everything from then is coming back. very slowly but all the sudden i see it. i feel ( Read more... )

im sold. nothing else compares. i hope the feelings are mutual. what have i done? oh god, what have i done? im falling, harder than ever, and i dont want that to go away. i dont want that love to go anywhere, but into my arms ( Read more... )

basically the subject says it all.
shes not angela.
no one is. therefore im not interested.
i try, but my mind always goes back to her.
i cant help it.