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[series]: Doctor Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog
[character]: Captain Hammer
[character history / background]: We don’t really find out much about him, but we know that he’s been enemies with Doctor Horrible for quite some time now. He has also given Doc Horrible his share of beatings in order to defeat him. We first see Captain Hammer onscreen rescuing a girl, unknown to him, from a van that he took out of Doctor Horrible’s control by punching the controls. As he’s beating the bad Doctor, Penny, the girl that he rescued, comes out of the garbage heap that he threw her into to thank him. Because they seem to be smitten with each other, he goes out with her; to a soup kitchen. Not exactly his version of romantic, but it’s what she likes, so he’ll go along with it and make sure he looks like he’s genuinely into this whole thing.
After he goes out that one time, he uses his connections to make the mayor sign over a building to be a homeless shelter, which is what Penny wanted. Normally he wouldn’t expend so much effort on a girl, but the fact that his enemy likes her is reason enough to take her completely away from him. He gets a dedication ceremony of the new homeless shelter, along with a statue of himself, so he sings a speech to his audience, intending to be uplifting to go with the theme of the day, and while it works, anyone who isn’t entranced with him can notice it falls a little bit short of purely inspirational.
As he’s closing up the song, he gets frozen, which is where I shall be picking him up if accepted. When he unfreezes, he punches Horrible squarely in the mouth, re-affirming where everyone’s places are in the scheme of things. He grabs the Death Ray that was going to be used on him with the idea to, in a sense of righteous irony, use it on its own creator. However, something very wrong happens when he attempts this, and it winds up exploding all over the place; a small piece hitting him, and the main part of the gun inadvertently killing Penny. He doesn’t see this, too preoccupied with what he assumes must be pain, because he has never felt such a thing before, and he runs out of the room, horrified. In the final number, we see him in a therapist’s office, crying, over something that we can’t hear. Assumed to be the fact that he felt pain, but there are some theories that have him crying over Penny’s death. He is unavailable for comment for the first time, due to his therapy sessions.
[character abilities]: Captain Hammer is a superhero, saving people, both as a large group and individually. Super strength, arguably super sexiness speed as well, but he’s fast. He also has really high and long jumps, almost giving the impression of flight.
[character personality]: Many might see Captain Hammer as all buff and no brain, but in fact he’s pretty smart. He can pick up on things rather easily, up to and including knowing when people are in danger, or when his arch-nemesis is crushing on his new girlfriend. (Of course, that last bit he might have also known due to watching Doctor Horrible’s blog.)
Due to this, he can use knowledge to his advantage, and can be downright manipulative when he wants to. He, most of the time, knows exactly what to say, and how to act to get people to love him, and he is successful at doing it. He’s often times very particular about his words that he uses when around certain people. He knows exactly how to get people eating out of the palms of his hands, or just what will tick them off enough to mess with them just so.
He’s very charming, to ladies and males alike, because he’s the hero, and he knows it, and makes sure that everyone else knows it. He loves the attention and the glory, and the sex with lots of different women doesn’t hurt too much, either. He plays up the hero aspect of himself quite a bit, as well as his physical attributes, no matter what’s going on around him; he likes people knowing the fact (because no, it’s not an opinion) that he’s incredibly good looking. He doesn’t have any faults, if you were to ask him, because, quite simply, he’s flawless, I mean, would you find fault in that natural beauty and talent?
He is described as cheesy, and that’s a very accurate term to describe him, because he says the typical heroic things, and bad jokes, and all of that. Although, he sometimes gets a little confused and mixed up (e.g. “But home is where the heart is, so your real home’s in your chest.”) He also has a tendency to say inappropriate things at certain times, but this doesn’t bother him because he knows he’ll always be able to win his fans back.
Unlike his evil counterpart, he has no trouble whatsoever with killing, and while we can’t be completely sure if he’s done it previously, he doesn’t hesitate in the least when given the opportunity to kill his rival. And while he has never beat him to death in any previous meets, throwing a car at somebody’s head isn’t exactly a pansy attack.
[point in timeline you're picking your character from]: As he’s frozen in time by Doctor Horrible’s freeze ray, during his dedication ceremony.
[journal post]:
Ah-hah hah . . . So, Mayor, how was tha- youuuuu aren’t here anymore, are you? Penny? Adoring fans? Smelly guy? Where’d you all go? And how did you bring the auditorium with you?
This place doesn’t look familiar at all. But never fear, good citizens! For I, Captain Hammer, am here to save you all from any danger that you might be in! And then after that’s done, I can go back to the dedication and look at my handsome, heroic self in the form of a rock.
. . . The rock is shaped like me; it’s a statue.
But for now, I’ll stand down from my podium, in order to see each of your individual faces more clearly, so that you may all become closer to me, Captain Hammer.
[third person / log sample]:
It had been another good- scratch that- great day for Captain Hammer. Due to his cunning sense of imminent danger, he had been able to stop a potential bank robbery. It also helped that that he overheard the thugs talking about it, but if he hadn’t have known to be on that street in the first place, they would have never been able to stop them in time. As the felons were brought away in handcuffs, the lovely news reporter came up to him to ask a few questions. Of course she would, though; he was the hero, and it was as much her job to ask him questions as much as it was his to punch in the faces of evil.
“So, Captain Hammer, you’ve defeated yet another pair of criminals. We all know you’re good at what you do, but everyone’s dying to know, why did you become a hero in the first place?” She held the microphone up to his mouth, camera crew, and audience holding their breaths in anticipation.
He grinned, reveling in the moment and attention. He paused for exactly the right amount of dramatic tension, and then began. “Why did I become a hero? Well, with all my amazing strength, speed, and sheer athletic abilities, it would have been a crime to not help everybody out. Although, if you did have to arrest me, I do hope that you’d be gentle with the handcuffs, Officer.” He held out his arms straight out in front of him, and threw a wink to a police woman that he’d had his eyes on for a time. She smiled, before going back to deal with her squad.
Oh yeah, he was totally getting laid tonight.
As much as that line might have sounded rehearsed, which it was, to an extent, it was the truth. He first realized his super-human abilities at a young age, and ever since then, he’d been on the side of justice. Even when he was younger, he’d been able to take on such menial villains like petty thieves. He remembered one of his earliest triumphs, it had been some old, wrinkly, smelly woman who had her purse stolen in the park.
Precocious little tyke that he had been, he ran up to the purse-snatcher, gave him a good punch in the gut, and returned the bag to the lady; the nice, full of money, bag. She had given him quite a handsome bit of what was in her wallet for his trouble, and there had been an article in the local paper. The attention had been addictive, and when he found out about the Evil League of Evil, he knew it was up to him to protect the people from harm’s way, he was to become Their Hero.
As the photographers moved in closer to take pictures, he called out to them, “Make sure that you don’t get my bad side on film, boys; oh. Wait, that’s right. I don’t have a bad side. Ah-hah hah!” He struck a pose with him flexing his muscles, as people crowded around him.
Ah, it was good to be Captain Hammer.