A Prayer for the Wild at Heart (Part Four)

[hopenight]

“The impossible often has a kind of integrity that the merely improbably lacks.” -Douglas Adams

So I have to admit that things kind of got better after the Rocky Horror stuff. I mean, it wasn’t raining sunshine and rainbows but things were going smoother for the club as a whole. Which was pretty awesome. I mean we were getting new songs and people seemed to be in good spirits about the upcoming mess that is Sectionals. Rachel was preparing her already intense sessions and for the most part had respectfully you know respected the whole “yes we are really broken up thing” for the moment.

Big thumbs up for me.

As for me?

Well the downside (or upside) to Rocky Horror was that well…suddenly I knew what Mister Schue looked like under all of those sweater vests and teacher clothes. And my mind went to a very different place fueled by my growing crush and healthy dose of hormones.

I’m a teenager! It happens and perfectly natural according to all the stuff I read and seen! So yeah I took notice of this guy who happens to be my teacher and my crush and who’s gorgeous body was right there of course that what happened happened.

I suddenly had a good fantasy fodder for when I…ummm choke the monkey.

Spank the snake.

Beat the wiener.

You know…masturbate.

And I know it’s kind of gross and maybe a little creepy that I did that while thinking about Mister Schue. But come on! He’s really hot and this was the first time I was ever interested in a guy. So of course I would be…excited.

I mean not that saying all I did was masturbate because I didn’t and…this is getting really awkward to write out.

Just as I’m sure this getting really really really awkward for you to read. So I won’t talk about this stuff anymore.

Nope. No more masturbation talk from me.

You know what? Never mind. Forget it happened and that it was mentioned quite a bit.

Safer topics. Much, much safer topics are needed in this instance. But without losing track of the overall story would be good.

OH! I have one.

Tutoring was going pretty awesomely.

I was pulling a B average and it felt pretty fucking amazing. Mom was thrilled as well because of the grades, you know? And Sam was also doing a lot better with English with Mister Schue encouraging him and checking his essays.

And then there were moments during tutoring where Sam would look between us with an odd look on his face. It was also like he was seeing something that he couldn’t quite believe. And it was weird but Sam speaks Elvish and Nav’ii…fluently. I think he knows Klingon too, but I figured it was just Sam. I mean you know he’s a proud geek and I just thought that was part of the package.

I wasn’t really concerned about what he was staring at.

Truthfully I just thought he was day dreaming.

Until he started asking really strange questions.

For example:

“So uh what do you think of Mister Schue?”

And you know that’s a pretty standard teacher question.

“He’s a pretty awesome guy isn’t he?”

Well duh. It’s Mister Schue. He occasionally steps his foot in it but he’s a great guy.

“How long have you two been talking?”

…I wasn’t even sure what Sam meant by that question.

“Dude is pretty ripped right?”

I thought Sam had some latent bi-curious tendencies.

And that’s totally cool because I was discovering my latent bisexual side. So I totally understood where he was coming from. Except that probably wasn’t the case now that I think about it…otherwise Kurt would have picked up on it and began and a bitchslap fight with Quinn for Sam then and there.

I was especially  confused when Puck, recently released from juvie, got in on the act.

For example (verbatim, dictated but not read):

“So are you and Mister Schue doin’ some grade a mackin?”

“DUDE! WHAT THE HELL?!”

Obviously, Puck still hasn’t learned the meaning of tact. Which is alright I guess but still if they were trying to be discreet then Sam should have just…kept his observations to himself and not told Puck. Because seriously Puck’s a bigger gossip than Coach Sylvester and Jacob Ben Israel combined. He just doesn’t show it because it would ruin his badass image.

Of course at the time, because I am an idiot, I thought Puck was just making fun of my new friendship with Mister Schue.

So I just dismissed it.

And what can I say? I mean Mister Schue was getting pissed at the bullying problem at the school. And I hated seeing Kurt going through what he had to go through. I tried to get him to talk about it. I really did. I asked him to let me know if any of the guys on the football team were bothering him. So I could talk to them or you know beat their asses.

But Kurt looked at me and said, “Finn violence doesn’t solve violence. I’ll endure. I just have to be strong.”

And that was all he had to say on the matter. I get it too. Kurt’s a pretty strong and independent guy. He doesn’t like people’s pity but sometimes I think he gets pity and concerned confused. I was honestly concerned for him because he was getting more and more withdrawn and snippy. But if he wanted to sort this out on his own then that was his prerogative.

I honestly didn’t think it was as bad as it was.

So I didn’t know how bad it really was until later in the game.

That’s a little further ahead of what I want to talk about right now though.

So just hold that thought for a moment.

I was kind of sick of two of my friends acting a little nutty.

And being figuratively sick wasn’t the only thing happening at the school.

(See what I did there? Kickass segue huh? You know it is.)

A flu of epic, epic proportions was spreading around the school like wildfire. I mean I was lucky in the fact that I just didn’t get sick. Well I did sometimes but I usually got over whatever I got pretty quickly. So it was a little known thing that I had perfect attendance since freshman year.

As nerdy as that sounds I was pretty proud of that. I never really had a perfect anything in my life so I was kind of determined to graduate with perfect attendance.

So when the school broke out in a pandemic, I broke out the OJ you know? Built up the Vitamin C and decided to nip this in the bud before I was even exposed to the bug.

And I get to school and that’s when things get weird.

(Or weirder than usual for McKinley.)

Then there was that rumor about Coach Sylvester being named interim principal while Figgins was ill. So I pretty much knew that I had to be in top form because she was going to pull off some shit. Luckily my wellness streak had prevailed as it has always done.

Unfortunately Mister Schue wasn’t so lucky.

I mean I could tell right off the bat when into glee that day that he wasn’t feeling well at all. And it made a bit nervous because he does seem like the type to work through being sick rather than let someone take care of him.

And I knew he was right when he stared at us like he was seeing us but at the same time wasn’t. I’ve seen them enough on other people to know that he was sick.

Which had me up in an instant telling him to let him take him home.

“Five year olds can’t drive especially one as short as you.”

“Yeah. Sure. Come on Mister Schue I’ll take you home.”

So yeah that was the beginning of the whole Holly Holiday situation.

“The most important thing when ill, is to never lose heart.” -Lenin (Vladimir Ulyanov)

“Finn you don’t have to be here,” coughed out the teacher lying on the couch. Face flushed from fever.

Yeah like that was going to chase Finn away. The man had no one to come in and make sure that he was okay. Even Finn had a baby sitter when he was sick and his mom had to work. So the teenager didn’t care how old the teacher was, someone was staying with him for at least a little while. And if that had to be him then so be it.

“Mister Schue, you’re running a fever and you were hallucinating. Trust me. You need me here.”

“I don’t know if this is…”

“Appropriate? Yeah well sometimes the rules have to be ignored in times of great stress and need.”

The teacher opened his mouth to say something but instead sneezed as Finn puttered around the kitchen, looking for soup preferably Campbell’s. Something easy that he can just heat up on the stove rather than going out and getting some.

Score! Chicken Noodle right there. Finn grabbed the can, spent several minutes trying to figure out the stove, and started heating the soup before going to check on the sick man.

“I feel like I got ran over by a bus,” groaned Mister Schue from his place on the couch with the comforter from his room wrapped around him.

“Did you take your temperature?” asked Finn as he tentatively rested his hand against the man’s forehead.

“It’s a one oh one,” coughed the teacher.

“Well I have some soup on your stove which I should check on in a moment. I brought you some juice and cold pills.”

“Thanks Finn.”

“No problem. Anything else?”

The teacher mumbled something around his glass.

“Uh-huh. Tell me that again when I get back with your soup.”

After getting the soup (he didn’t spill it over! Score!), Mister Schue took a spoonful before saying, “Uh well…in my DVD cabinet there’s a move in there. Singin’ in the Rain…could you grab it for me?”

“Sure any reason?” asked Finn as he went to the get the movie.

“This sounds embarrassing. But uh…I always watch it when I’m sick. It kind of makes me feel better.”

And, Finn was fairly certain, he blushed at that admission which made him smile.

“I watch John Wayne movies when I’m sick for the same reason.”

They both smiled at each other. A sudden understanding formed in that moment before Finn busied himself with putting the DVD in the player.

“You can go home if you want Finn. I’m pretty sure I can take it from here.”

Finn didn’t like the thought of leaving Mister Schue all by himself. But he had to admit that it was getting late and his mom was going to be home from work soon. And it was his turn to fix something for dinner tonight.

So he relented.

“Alright Mister Schue. Let me just leave you my number. So that way you don’t have to go out and get sicker. Just call me or text or whatever and I’ll run out and pick it up.”

“You don’t have to…,” began Mister Schue from the couch.

Finn cut him off before he could get any farther. He wanted to be here. He wanted to make sure this man who’s his teacher and friend (and source of masturbatory fantasies) had someone that he could call to check in on him.

“I want to. Big difference. Someone has to take care of you when you’re sick. Besides Mom will understand. She probably wouldn’t like the thought of you here sick alone anymore then I do.”

A curly head peeking up from under the comforter nodded while the movie played.

Finn smiled gently before leaving the apartment.

Where he ran into Mrs. Schuester.

Or uh ex Mrs. Schuester.

He should really find out if that bird who is cuckoo for Coco Puffs has a name and start calling her that.

Well fuck then. He’s still a little creeped out by her coming onto him a couple months ago during his brief employment at Sheet’s N Things. Not that his own feelings for Mister Schue are wholly different things but at least he doesn’t feel like he should touch a courtroom doll in front of people.

Maybe if he started screaming “BAD TOUCH NO!” at the top of his lungs she would go away.

“Oh uh Hi Finn,” said ex-Mrs Schuester with a confused look on his face.

“Hey Mrs….uh…”

“It’s Miss Delmonico now actually,” she said kind of sadly like she wished it wasn’t true and then she looked kind of concerned, “I heard Will was sick.”

“Yeah but um I got him all squared away.”

“Why are you here Finn?”

Ah the one instance where the truth would set you free.

“I kind of volunteered because he was sick and no one at glee felt comfortable about having him drive home while he was sick like that you know?”

“Well then I’ll just pop in and I…”

Finn cut her off, determined to keep her away from Mister Schue. He knew that this was one of those instances where the crazy had to be kept away in a lock box safe container with DO NOT OPEN written in bold letters on it.

So he kind of fudged the truth a little bit.

“He was actually sleeping so that’s why I left. You should come by later. “

Miss Delmonico looked frusterated but she was talked into a corner.

And Finn could tell when she let out a sigh.

“Oh well then…”

Better make sure she actually goes though. She could just wait until Finn goes into the elevator and then invade the apartment with her crazy.

“I’ll walk you to your car?”

“Sure thank you, Finn.”

Well that was one disaster temporarily avoided.

“My experience is that as soon as people are old enough to know better, they don't know anything at all.”-Oscar Wilde

The other disaster was Holly Holiday.

Which kind of sounds like a porn stars name.

…

Which probably explains why Puck liked her so much.

Alright I’m being mean I know but c’mon she kind of drove me a little bit crazy. I’m allowed to rag on teacher’s who drive me a little crazy it’s like in the student’s handbook or something.

Actually she seemed kind of cool at first. If a little ditzy. I mean she was pretty smart and energetic with a million watt smile. However, there was something about her that kind of bugged me in an annoying way.

And I knew what it was.

See I have this where it kinds of drive me a bit nutty when adults tried to act like teenagers instead of adults. It truthfully makes me want to pull my hair out in the worse way imaginable because you people were already teenagers. There’s nothing cool about being a teenager outside of being given a mostly free pass for fuck ups and you don’t have to worry about taxes. But that’s pretty much it so I think the whole adults acting like they’re teenagers thing is kind of stupid and makes me want to scream and bang my head into the nearest locker.

Maybe because this is Lima: Mid-Life Crisis capital of the world.

I have witnessed why too many instances of this happening.

Which essentially is what Miss Holiday was doing, granted it was done in a way which made her seem cool and hip and fooled everyone. She was thinking that she was getting down to our level, accept her into the teenager tribe. Pretty soon we would be dancing around chanting: “One of us. One of us.”

Yeah lady it wasn’t going to happen.

…

Then people started bitching about Mister Schue.

Which wasn’t cool.

“Remember: If you feel yourself getting mad, go ahead! If someone's doing something to irritate you, tell them about it in detail! And hike.... whenever you feel like it!” -Mr. DeMartino ‘Daria’

Okay doing Forget You was pretty fun. Finn had to admit that.Mainly because he digged Cee-Lo’s mad beats. But for the most part he liked the unedited version better because it was a great song to distract himself when he was thinking about his relationship with Rachel.

But this bitching about Mister Schue and the wishing that Miss Holiday was the glee director…

Not so much. He could really leave it. Because yeah sometimes it’s nice to switch it up a bit but at the same time why change what’s not broken. It’s like those hot chicks in movies given totally unnecessary makeovers.

So of course Finn’s mouth had to say something. Sometimes though Finn really did wish that his mouth would communicate with his brain and give it a head’s up on what’s going down.

“Guys! Come on! You can’t betray Mister Schue like that!”

“Come on Finn. He never listens to us,” complained Puck as he looks at his bro with a raised eyebrow.

Finn, who’s brain had caught up with his mouth, felt a flash of anger. Because that was just a blatant out and out lie. Mister Schue totally learned to listen, especially after the disco incident last year.

“Oh that’s bull and you know it! He always tries to be fair. And to you know make sure that we all have a say. Or do you forget about Britney Spears so soon?!”

“Finn…” tried Tina gently.

“Don’t Finn me! He always defends us and tries his best! He has a freaking reason behind his every decision and just because he doesn’t explain him to you makes him a bad person! It makes him the adult. You want to betray Mister Schue?! Fine! But I’ll have no part in it!”

And then he grabbed his backpack and stalked past Miss Holiday on the way out. He could see red at the edges of his vision blurring it into some hate filled thing. And Finn refused to give into that side of himself. He kind of understood why Rachel liked her dramatic exits right now. It did feel kind of good to do one. He almost should have asked the band to play him out. But Finn needed to be calm right now. So he forced himself to go somewhere where he would have to be calm.

Tossing his car keys in the air and catching them, Finn started to walk to his car with the only objective in his mind going to check on Mister Schue.

He found Mister Schue bundled up in a scarf and baggy sweats.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

“You look like hell,” stated Finn as he looked at the man.

“I feel worse,” coughed the teacher, “Why aren’t you in glee?”

Well he could lie and make him feel better or he could tell him the truth…which probably wouldn’t be conducive to the healing process.

Or he could be vague.

“I didn’t like the sub that was chosen and felt that maybe you could do with some company.”

And Mister Schue sneezed before giving Finn a watery smile, “Thanks.”

“No problem, Mister Schue. Uh do you want anything to drink?”

“Some water please.”

“Tap?”

“Straight from I’m feelin’ like I pay the damn water bill then I deserve to quality tap water.”

“No such thing I’m afraid.”

And just like that they fell into this comfortable small talk as Finn gathered water and medicine.

“I uh stopped your ex from coming in last night.”

“Terri was here?”

“Yeah.”

“Damn,” cursed the teacher, “I knew I should have gotten the locks changed. It’s just like her to come and get me when I’m weak.”

“Wow. Seriously?”

“Yeah. I can’t deal with this right now.”

“Hey you should be resting. I’ll handle your ex. You watch your movie…wow how long have you bee watching it?”

“Had it on repeat. I dozed off at some point last night.”

“Well that warms my heart. But you should be sleeping.”

“Slept all day.”

“Get some more rest. I’ll go get you more soup and medicine.”

Finn puttered around the kitchen for a while and watched some of Mister Schue’s movie while he slept. Then there was a knock at the door.

“Oh! Finn!”

She looked nervous and shifted her feet back and forth like she wanted to ask what he was doing here.

“Hi Rachel. What do you want?”

“I was hoping to talk to Mister Schuester about the Holly Holiday situation. What are you doing here?”

“He’s all alone, Rachel. Someone has to come by and check on him and since this is right by my house I figured I should swing by on my way home and see if he needed anything.”

And Rachel nodded accepting and discarding the answer as she tried to look over Finn’s shoulder with an anxious air to her movements.

“Could I talk to him? She has to be stopped!”

While Finn didn’t see why it was such a big deal. It wasn’t like she was going to be around forever. And he wasn’t going to let Arachel overload Mister Schue especially since he should be resting.

“Yeah well he’s resting and he doesn’t need any more stress. Can’t it wait a couple of days?”

“A couple days could be too late by then! She’s evil!”

“Rachel she’s not evil. Now come on he’s really sick. Let’s just let him rest okay?”

“Bu-but!”

“Goodbye Rachel,” said Finn gently but firmly as he gently shut the door.

“Finn!”

Finn rolled his eyes and sighed before going to get himself something to drink. He walked into the living room to see the teacher stare up at him before croaking out a question.

“Who’s Miss Holiday?”

“You were listening?”

“Rachel’s voice has a way of rousing me. Like a really annoying rooster.” And then the teacher shut his eyes, “I didn’t mean to say that.”

Finn started cracking up though look at him with a smile, “I feel the same way most days. But she’s pretty okay. Things are just weird because we broke up.”

“Oh I know how that feels.”

“Miss Pillsbury and Doctor Howell?”

“We weren’t even dating and,” here he paused to cough, “I’m still hung up on her a little bit! It drives me insane.”

“Whoa calm down there. No need to work yourself up in a coughing fit.”

“Sorry,” said Mister Schue as he balled up another tissue.

“It’s okay you can vent.”

Mister Schue just gave Finn this tired smile. And Finn’s heart pounded in his chest as he took in the sleep mussed hair, the stubble along the jaw and the snugly tied scarf around his neck.

Finn swallowed thickly trying not think of how nice he looked in that moment. Even sick.

Fuck he had it bad didn’t he?

“Finn? You alright?”

“Yeah I fine.”

And then the next day, Evil Overlord Sylvester fired Mister Schue. Leading to Finn ditching again, and dodging Miss Holiday’s attempts to talk with him.

Mister Schue looked totally miserable.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“I’m sorry about your job.”

“Yeah well see when Hell came on Earth aka when Sue became principal I kind of knew that was in the cards. I met my replacement.”

“Yeah what did you think?”

“She said that a kid clocked her and that when she woke up she decided to get down onto teenagers level.”

“Wow. I wonder if that scrambled her brains.”

“Finn!”

“What? Don’t get me wrong. I like her but it just seems like she’s trying too hard. You’re a way better teacher.”

And Mister Schue grinned, “Thanks Finn.”

“No problem Will.”

And he froze.

Shit.

That slipped out didn’t it?

“I am so sorry. That’s so rude and disrespectful. It just slipped out because I feel really comfortable and I consider us kind of friends and oh God I am so so sorry.”

“It’s alright Finn. I’m not a teacher anymore. Besides we’re friends right?”

Yeah.

Finn just said it himself, they were friends.

Well it was kind of easier to have big fat crush on his friend who was also his ex-teacher and…

Oh Finn was going to a special section of Special Hell wasn’t he? Right next to the people who kick puppies.

Miracle Max: Have fun stormin' da castle.
Valerie: Think it'll work?
Miracle Max: It would take a miracle. -The Princess Bride

So in the end it all worked out.

Well at least we got Will back. So I’m saying that it worked out pretty damn well.

After an unfortunate incident involving Coach Sylvester’s Le Car and a potato (done by Mercedes hell hath no fury like a girl separated from her tater tots) and Miss Holiday’s inability to deal with the situation,Will was put back in his rightful position in short order.

Plus we got to do a mashup with that song from Singin’ in the Rain and Umbrella.

And we got to dance in water, which was really fun. I was totally a kid who would jump into muddle puddles and play in the rain. It drove Mom batty.

Doubly fun especially watching Will dance in water.

Very, very doubly fun, I never knew I had a thing for men in waistcoats and fedoras until that number. Then again it could be just Will…but I totally added it to my fantasy fodder.

And that was pretty much it for things that got better.

It actually got progressively worse for Kurt.

See Kurt was still being bullied by Karofsky.

Granted I still didn’t know how bad it was, until I witnessed it with my eyes.

AKA when he shoved Kurt into a locker and out and out threatened him.

In front of a hallway of people in the middle of the day. And no one but me stopped to help him. Like seriously? I get that teenagers are self-centered but c’mon you don’t just leave someone flopping in the window like that.

Kurt looked terrified.

And when I tried to comfort him or offer some words. He just kind of pushed me away and said that he was dealing with it.

Yeah he was dealing with it alright.

But not in the right way…

So I told this to the others and somehow this leads to Sam, Mike, Puck, and Artie calling for blood. And I get, I really really do but…solving violence with violence just didn’t seem like the right way to handle something like this.

So I wanted to try for a more adult situation by talking to Karofsky first.

Because Will told me about this guy Ghandi who was this really BAMF dude and preached nonviolence and stuff. Well not preached but he always said that there was an alternative to violence.

And this is not me pussying out or anything.

Kurt’s going to be my brother.

I truly do care about his wellbeing and his happiness. And the fact that this was getting really really out of hand just wasn’t good. Because Kurt deserved to love whoever he wanted to love and not you know get called for it. And it wasn’t like he was hurting anyone either, rather the fact was that he was trying to live his life.

And Kurt may be a lot of things, but he’s not a violent guy.

I like to think that I know him well enough to know that he wouldn’t want us to sink so low as to get in a fight for him.

Of course everyone somehow took this to mean that I wasn’t a leader just because I wasn’t calling for Karofsky’s head on a pike and acting like Tarzan or a caveman or something pounding my chest and pissing on the territory. It kind of pissed me off that they thought about me in that light.

And I confessed it to Will during our solitary tutoring session that night. He just gave me a sad smile when I told him it.

“Well I’m glad your first thought isn’t toward violence, Finn. I have to say that Sue is very adamant that Karofsky keep his nose clean and not hurt Kurt. It kind of surprised me on her end, but she wants the bullying problem to end just as much as we do. But that’s an extremely mature decision on your end considering the effects of that course of action and Kurt’s own feelings in that light.”

And Will paused to take off his glasses.

This sounds really shallow and kind of girlish and dumb, but I couldn’t help but notice his eyes. A mixture of gray and green and…and he was talking so I snapped back to paying attention.

“While some of your fellow classmates are mature they also have moments when they are just teenagers as well. The fact that you wanted to try an approach that didn’t resort to violence shows an amazing maturity. I’m very very proud of you Finn.”

“Really?”

The smile turned a little more genuine, “Really.”

“Thanks Will.”

He gave permission to call him it when we got together for private tutoring. Since we were kind of friends and I loved it. The fact that I was allowed to call him by his first name instead of the distant teacher name…it made these things seem real and scary and amazing all at once.

“No problem, Finn.”

So I was feeling pretty good about this whole non-violent confrontation thing you know? And we tried to use our words.

Then Karofsky pushed Artie from his chair.

Which sent Sam into action but that ended when Karofsky called him a retard and pushed him into the lockers.

Then he stared at me.

“I hope you and your fag brother burn in hell, Hudson.”

And I kind of saw red.

A lot of red.

Like swirls and swirls of it.

I really don’t remember the next few minutes of this time. Though I am told that it was impressive and terrifying all at once like something out of Hulk tv show except I didn’t turn green and into Lou Ferigno.

The next thing I DO remember I was on top of Karofsky pounding his face into hamburger meat. Coach Bieste, Puck, Sam, and Mike were pulling me off of him.

I was thankful that she just didn’t expel from the team. I mean I was suspended from the next game but it could have been a lot worse.

A look of understanding overcame her face when we told her what happened. Most of the guys on the team backed us up in an unexpected show of support. They may not like Kurt and even agree with his lifestyle choice, but even they saw that Karofsky was taking this a little too far.

I was kind of embarrassed to tell the situation to Will who, to my surprise, just laughed.

“B-but what about being mature and rational and all that stuff?”

“Finn, there are times when you have to be an adult and there are times when you have to give into your baser instincts and kick the guys ass. Even though I’m supposed to be a teacher and an adult so doubly mature, I still wish I could have a free shot at him. Now do you think this song would be okay for the wedding?”

Yeah no one was as surprised as Will when Kurt asked (read: told) him that he was going to be singing the first dance song, which I thought was a nice gesture. He chose some Latiny-Spanish number that Kurt adored.

And everything sort of came together.

Then Karofsky threatened Kurt.

“What is straight? A line can be straight, or a street, but the human heart, oh, no, it's curved like a road through mountains.” -Tennessee Williams

“Why didn’t you protect him?” demanded Burt angrily looking at Finn.

Who answered back with just as much vehemence.

“I didn’t know it started up again!”

And the two men stared at each for several seconds, until Burt nodded tightly accepting Finn’s story. He glanced around the room trying to not upset his heart.

“I want the kid’s head on a pike.”

“Dad…,” began Kurt softly.

Burt put his hands on his son’s shoulders and looked into his eyes.

“He threatened you Kurt.”

“He’s still doing that?” blurted out Finn a little outraged. His hands clenching and unclenching at the thought of it.

“You knew about this?” rounded Burt on him. Finn stared at his soon to be stepfather.

“I thought I took care of it, Burt. I nearly broke my hand in the fight with Karofsky. Kurt why didn’t you tell me? I would have helped you!”

“I didn’t want you to get into any worse off trouble because of me Finn! I appreciate what you were trying to do but…I just not for me. I couldn’t let you get into trouble for me and not over Karofsky. He’s not worth that.”

And awkward hush fell over the three men before Finn piped up.

“Can…can you not tell my mom that I got into a fight?”

Burt clapped his hand on Finn’s shoulder.

“Considering I want to do the same thing right now. We can keep this quiet. But I want a meeting with the principal now.”

“I’ll uh show you to her office, Dad. We’ll finish up another time, Finn?”

“Sure.”

And the two Hummel men were out the door a second later. Leaving Finn staring at his feet because the least he can do is not fall on his face at the wedding and mess up all of Kurt’s hard work.

“Alright let’s see if I can do this,” he mumbled to himself.

“Do what?”

Finn jumped into the air.

“Christ! You startled me!”

Will smiled apologetically, “Sorry. So what do you want to do?”

“Dance,” said Finn as he tried to correct his own footwork, “Kurt was teaching us and Burt found out about Karofsky. Apparently he’s decided to start shit back up again. So they went to see Coach…uh…Principal Sylvester.”

“Still weird to say isn’t it? I am loathed to admit but she’s good at her job.”

“I think the temperature in Hell just got several degrees colder,” said Finn before pausing, “Or warmer depending on the circle.”

Will’s eyebrow went straight up into his hairline, “Dante?”

“Yeah. We have to read about him in English. Kurt showed me this movie version of it with like paper dolls. It was twisted but I kind of liked it.”

Will laughed before walking over.

“I have the same movie. You’re going to read the book though right?”

Finn laughed at that, “Yeah. I just wished it was kind of like those No Fear Shakespeare books so I can understand what he’s saying.”

Will chuckled under his breath before changing the subject, “So dancing huh?”

“Glee has helped improved my sense of rhythm,” began Finn before looking down at his feet, “but I still suck at it.”

“Do you need any help?” asked the teacher.

Silence permeated the air that. Fraught with implications on both ends.

Then Will flushed, “That wasn’t appropriate. I just meant that…oh God…”

Finn decided to toss him the metaphorical life preserver.

“No I got what you meant. Maybe you can help me. We could close the doors if you’re more comfortable with that.”

“Probably a good idea and the blinds.”

A couple of minutes later, they were standing in the center of the room.

“Alright so Kurt showed me where to place my hands.”

“That’s a good start. Alright then.”

Finn swallowed thickly as he placed a hand on Will’s shoulder and one on his waist.

OhGodOhGodOhGod.

His hands were on Will’s waist. And it’s a very nice waist. And ohGod he is touching Will! And it feels really really nice.

…Almost too nice.

Shit. Alright Hudson go to your safe zone.

MailmanMailmanMailman

While thinking about the mailman, and trying not to notice Will’s scent and how nice his hand felt on his hip, Finn started to learn the dance moves.

Dean: Did you really used to wear a skirt?
Crowley: A kilt. I had very athletic calves.-Supernatural

Yeah.

I had lots of interesting dreams that night.

And a couple nights after.

Very interesting dreams.

But I’m not getting into the details right now. Because this is not the time or place or the medium of writing (Hello Penthouse Forum).

At the same time, to counteract the copious sex dreams, most of them were just of me and Will hanging out and talking you know? Doing all sorts of normal stuff like reading the paper and watching a movie and stuff like that.

So I had to admit that I was maybe doing more than crushing…

A lot more.

But the wedding took up much more of my time to think rather than thinking about these feelings. I had to give my mom away to Burt and learn all the dance moves for the aisle. Plus I was busy doing Kurt’s surprise ‘welcome to the family as my brother and I’m really happy to have you here’ number.

Oh that wedding, it was the day that changed everything. I never really saw my mom more radiant or happy. Burt looked like the whole world could end then and there but he wouldn’t have given two shakes because he was marrying my Mom.

Alright there was some initial awkwardness in the beginning with Santana. I don’t really know why but I guess Rachel had been annoying her with the bones of our dead and buried relationship.

And okay so I wasn’t fully honest with Rachel over the fact that I wasn’t a virgin. But…But that was something totally different. As lame as the excuse is, I am a horny teenage boy. Of course I was going to lie my ass off.

But Will knew the truth, a voice reminded me in the back of my head.

I really hate that voice sometimes.

And the reception.

Oh God the reception.

Will sang that song. And it was sexy and amazing and lovely all at once. The way he sang the song. The way he crooned it all out. All slow and seductive and amazng like molasses and dark chocolate and a lot of really good things that you don’t think would taste good but really really do.

Then his eyes met mine from the stage and he gave me this smile. Kind of sultry and amazing and had my heart pounding in my chest. I couldn’t take my eyes off of him.

And then it was over.

And as I talked about couple names and how much I care about my new brother. I couldn’t help but think about what would Will and I have for a couple name.

Fill?

Winn?

Schudson?

Hudster?

And when we started to perform Just the Way You Are for Kurt, I looked out and met his eyes.

Will was giving me this huge smile as he cheered from his seat. Making me feel…like I could do anything.

It was in that moment that I realized it.

I was in love with him.

And it was a stomach churning revelation that I was in love with my much older teacher and friend. It kind of knotted up my insides.

I didn’t throw up until later.

Much much later when I could blame it on something other than being in love with Will.

Amazingly past that initial vomiting of nerves, I felt…okay with it. Comfortable like it was something that was always in the back of my head. Like almost instinctively I knew that I loved him on some level and cared about him deeply.

It was easy loving Will in a way that was strange and odd and great.

The only thing I was worried was telling him. Because I knew that I was going to tell him.

Of course the opportunity presented itself in the oddest of ways.

Karofsky came back because the school board declared there was insufficient grounds for his expulsion. And this is why I hate adults in power sometimes their heads are so far up their asses that it’s a wonder they can walk.

Kurt was transferring to Dalton Academy. And I understood that if I had that kind of attention focused on me then one day I would have broken down and asked for a transfer to. Kurt was trying to get out of a bad situation.

I still felt like that worse brother in the world. Because I couldn’t protect him and I felt so bad. We were a family and now Kurt was going off to Dalton where he had some friends and stuff. But I felt so selfish that I wanted him there with me.

So I stayed after glee to talk with Will about it.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints,-I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! -and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death. -Elizabeth Barret Browning

“Is it wrong that I’m angry that he had to go?”

“Oh Finn of course not.”

“I…I thought that we were going to be a real family. We barely had time to be a real family. Mom, Burt, me and Kurt…it was going to be good.”

“I’m sorry about this, Finn. We’re going to fight this. And Karofsky won’t be getting off easy.”

Finn stared up at him and nodded before sniffing a little.

“Thanks for listening to me.”

And Will bumped his shoulder against Finn’s.

“It’s no problem, Finn.”

They sat in a comfortable silence. Before Finn casts a sidelong glance at him and Will returned the glance.

Suddenly the air in the room changed.

“I-I should go,” said Finn as he stood.

“Uh okay…,”replied Will standing as well.

They stood in the middle of the room looking at each other. Finn staring at Will as a voice seemed to say ‘do it’.

He didn’t know what came over him.

He kissed Will.

It was chaste, barely a brush of lips against lips. So quick that it was almost like what his mom called a “butterfly kiss” when her eyelashes would brush against his cheek.

Then the hormones took over.

Lips met lips in surprised passion. Finn’s hand curled against the back of Will’s neck. And his lips were there, slight chapped but kind of soft but not like how girls lips were. It was a teeth clacking, ohmygodpleasedon’tstop kiss. He was desperately holding onto this instant.

Old Spice, soap, aftershave filled his senses, making the world around him hazy. They backed up into the piano, jostling it making the keys sound at once in some sort of strange cacophony. And Jesus Christ, was he moaning? A deep guttural sound was emerging from Will’s throat absolutely lovely and filthy all once.

Acting on instinct, Finn swiped his tongue against Will’s bottom lips. A mouth opened in surprise and Finn snaked his tongue in there. He tasted like peppermint and chocolate and Finn was determined to lick every last ounce of the taste away. Because he wantedneededpleaspleaseplease more, more. And oh hello Will’s erection digging into his thigh because Will’s leg was up and he was half on and half off the piano still making that noise.

And Oh God what the hell was he doing?!

Finn pulled away, stumbled back and stared in shock. Will stood there looking mussed and dazed and glassy eyed. And shitshitshitfuckingshit, he screwed up.

So Finn did the only thing a scared teenage boy would do in this situation.

He turned tail and ran.