Dreams, goals, happiness, and arg!
This might be kinda lengthy tonight, just to warn ya.
Ok, so today was pretty much awesome. To start, I didnt have to work. Meaning, I slept in (till 10! ugh, I'm already being programmed to get up early!) So I managed to sit around all day and just recover from my driveway paving and weedwhacking experience. That was chill.
I ordered tix for the Rise Against concert next Friday night. It's going to be amazing! The band rocks and its a mosh-pit seating so thats just going to make it. The catch though is that I dont have anyone to go with, so if you're going, PLEASE let me know so I dont get ass raped in a back alley outside the theater in Hartford.
Spoke with Kels today too. She's doing NH!!!!! Unfortunately, I couldnt get outta my family thing on Sat so I cant go up on Friday like I would have liked. Oh well, I managed to get a "OK, you can bail after an hour" thing from my rents, so I'll be heading up at 3 instead of 10, which is nice. More time with Kels. And then I go back on Sunday, because I unfortunately have work on Monday. It kinda sucks, because Jack basically tells me when he needs me 2 days in advance so it makes planning stuff hard. Hopefully things'll become more regular hours-wise soon. And at least he's going to have me start working in glass, so no more odd jobs around his shop!
Arg! And Kels doesnt come online anymore at night! I'm really getting tired of this girl. You say you are and then you dont. Its basically the same as standing me up for a date, only not. :-p
So instead, I'm stuck making conversation with lesser friends (haha, bad term I know. My apologies to those reading this), which sucks because they always bail around midnight and I'm stuck jumping between conversations and its not consistent. I mean, what else am I going to do at this hour? Sleep? Haha, yeah right. And I'm running out of movies to keep me occupied at this late hour.
But lets see, tonight I spoke with Mallory, Andrew, Kiri, Rob, Lauren, this freshie from SMC whose name currently escapes me, and of course Meaghan. Man, she's fun. Better watch out Kels, she's starting to become my new fav to talk with online... At least she's online! Haha.
But on the topic of Meaghan, lets talk about that. I'm a little worried. I'm enjoying her company and convos a bit too much I fear. Just dont want to see myself getting attached again only to have things go the wrong way. Right now its just innocent even when we flirt and she seems interested in turn, but I cant help but wonder how things will be when I'm 1) away in Greece and 2) when I return. I mean, even if by some miracle shes still unattached when I get back, whos to say that I wont be as flaky as I was with Rachel? Its different when its just online because theres that distance, but in person?? Whos to say...
So when I talked with Mal today, she mentioned that she was talkin with Dube along with me. And guess what? I had that oh-too-familiar feeling. The one I had back when I was crushing on Kels and she was going after other guys. But its weird because I thought it wasnt even an issue anymore for me with Mal. And I really dont think it is, but I still had that familiar tingling when I heard that. Ugh. Haha. My apologies Mal.
Another theme seemed reoccurent in my convos tonight: my life goals and dreams. I know its probably just fantasy, but my plan for life is this: after graduation, open up the hookah bar. Run that for a few years and make some good cash. Several years later, take those savings and buy a boat (The "Far Darter" (Apollo reference)). Then sail the world for a few years living off my savings and writing my books, all the while having someone run the hookah bar for me but keeping me in on the profits. After that, return to the states and work on my climbing. And then, around my early 30s, try Everest. After that, I dont have a clue, but thats the plan. I'm probably going to end up dead at an early age from one of these things, but as I said to a friend, I'd rather go out living life to its fullest than being fearful of dying and ending up as some old geezer sitting in a wheelchair collecting dust as I desperately try to cling to life for no real reason. I mean, what kind of life is it if you're not living?
Andrew actually had an awesome idea when we were discussing my life goals, which I will share with you now: "Sail around the world on a boat with a hookah bar, stop in all the major cities to get business and finish with a bon jovi concert atop everest, then ski down." Sheer awesomeness right there.
Oh, and Bowling for Soup concert on July 11th in Hartford. Anyone interested? Its a Wed, but I could probably offer housing at Chez Breeckner afterwards.
Ok, thats enough of a rant. Dammit Kels, where are you? Its almost 1! Poor form, I'm most displeased. :-p