Brain Splurge
When you shut your eyes and picture the perfect world dreaming can sometimes
become a nightmare. And sometimes your nightmare can come to be the greatest dream you've ever had but it still doesn't change the fact that it leaves you spinning uncontrollably; lost in your own abyss. All you can do is Wait; wait for something to transition, to open up, to peel back so that you can run your finger tips across the soft quaint clouds. Wait for the breathing to stop, for the melody to fade into the sunshine you see in the mornings when you wake up, wait to feel the adrenaline pumping in and out of your blood stream. I wish someone would look deep inside my eyes and taste my intensity so that I don't have to hide under the covers anymore. It hurts to be unnoticed, to be an irrelevant piece of furniture in someones life. Am I that complicated and peculiar that I must pursue everyday utterly invisible. I know it's bad to say that I sometimes wish I can be in someone else's skin, but I can't help it. When you feel so much you can't even count on yourself to be there. And with no one to turn to the best thing you can do is dream of being someone else. I don't know if I'll ever stop fighting loneliness, or if I'll ever have the opportunity to win someone elses heart, all I know is that there will always be that tiny fragment of hope in me that will never stop trying, even if It means not finding that inevitable peace I've been searching for.
become a nightmare. And sometimes your nightmare can come to be the greatest dream you've ever had but it still doesn't change the fact that it leaves you spinning uncontrollably; lost in your own abyss. All you can do is Wait; wait for something to transition, to open up, to peel back so that you can run your finger tips across the soft quaint clouds. Wait for the breathing to stop, for the melody to fade into the sunshine you see in the mornings when you wake up, wait to feel the adrenaline pumping in and out of your blood stream. I wish someone would look deep inside my eyes and taste my intensity so that I don't have to hide under the covers anymore. It hurts to be unnoticed, to be an irrelevant piece of furniture in someones life. Am I that complicated and peculiar that I must pursue everyday utterly invisible. I know it's bad to say that I sometimes wish I can be in someone else's skin, but I can't help it. When you feel so much you can't even count on yourself to be there. And with no one to turn to the best thing you can do is dream of being someone else. I don't know if I'll ever stop fighting loneliness, or if I'll ever have the opportunity to win someone elses heart, all I know is that there will always be that tiny fragment of hope in me that will never stop trying, even if It means not finding that inevitable peace I've been searching for.