*dying of laughter*

[hollowdoll]

After many, many years on the Internet...I have found, quite possibly, the most awesome song in existence.

Labia

(sung to the tune of Layla, by Eric Clapton)

What'll you do when everybody
Is telling you you need a tuck or snip?
You've been listening to all the wrong advice
It's time you learned to love your lips.

Labia, they're awfully fun to tease,
Labia, orchid or fleur de lis,
Labia, a neverending feast of womankind.

We've tried to give you information,
But you've felt your twat has let you down.
Like a fool, you think your frillies are uncool
Let's turn this vulva-hate around.

Labia, from umber to deep rose,
Labia, they feel nice on the nose,
Labia, in every shape and size they're so divine.

Let's pull this train out of the station
Before I finally go insane.
So today, give your velvet curtains sway
And sing their praises! Don't complain.

Labia, a tasty, fleshy treat,
Labia, don't want to be discreet,
Labia, kneel down and pray before your petaled shrine.

Labia, (can't play this on guitar, but)
Labia, just perfect as they are
Labia, darlings won't you learn to treat them kind?

(The original link here, if anyone's interested.)

I want to find whoever wrote this. She needs to be my new best friend. XD