Chasing Shadows at Midnight

[hollow_strife]

Title: Chasing Shadows At Midnight
Author: LoveAngel2141
Beta Credit: torncorpse
Characters: Riku & Sora
Word Count: 11,561
Rating: NC_17
Summary: Riku only had a moment to contemplate exactly what Sora would be doing at his house, more precisely, what he would be doing barging into his room.
Disclaimer: This is a total and complete work of fiction. I in no way own any of the character's mentioned in this work of fiction. I am not making any sort of profit off of this.



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Authors's Note: So you can all basically blame rainbowserenity because she, well she gave me the pairing, and even if I did do the rest I'm still blaming this on her. This is my first time writing this pairing, and also the first time in more then a year that I've written any sort of smut. And also, if you actually get through all of this, I'll send you tiny ltitle Riku shaped cookies.
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Riku sat in the warm sand and stared out over the water. The mid day sun was beating down on his shoulders and back, but the warmth didn't seem to be able to reach him. The chill he felt was one that lived deep in his soul, one he would never fully eradicate, no matter how much time passed. Sometimes, he thought to himself as his eyes met the golden rays of the sun, sometimes time didn't heal all wounds. It only made them worse.

Sora had been sitting, half hidden under the shade of the giant palm tree he had chosen as his base camp. Every day for the past week he had watched as Riku walked over the white sand of the beach towards the water. He would sit there for what seemed like forever, staring out towards the horizon. He was searching for something, Sora thought, but for what he didn't know. He wondered if Riku even knew. And so from the first day when he had noticed a change in the pattern of his friend's behavior, he had snuck down to the beach after Riku, and had watched over him.

It had been two years since they had returned home and still, nothing had returned to the way it once was. Sora knew that it could never go back to being exactly the same, and even if it could have, he wouldn't have wanted it to. He wanted things to be different. He wanted the three of them to be closer. He wanted for Riku to finally be as close to Kairi as he was. He wanted for Kairi to feel as comfortable with Riku as she did with him. He simply wanted them to trust each other the way they trusted him.

But above all, he wanted to be closer to Riku. At that current moment however, the whole idea of ever being able to get close to Riku seemed daunting, if not impossible.

Riku, had he been aware of the fact that Sora was secretly watching him, would probably have thrown some kind of fit about how he was a big boy and could take care of himself. He didn't need Sora's protection. He wasn't like Kairi, he wasn't helpless.

Maybe that was the problem, Riku thought as he lifted his head and closed his eyes, letting the sun hit his face. Sora felt the need to protect, and Riku didn't need his protection. What Riku needed was his forgiveness.

It wasn't until the sun had retreated to the other side of the world, leaving the world in sheltered darkness, that Riku finally stood up and brushed himself off. He was sore from staying in the same position for so long but the pain felt good. It let him know that he was still alive. He may have felt worn out and hollow inside, but he was still alive. He was still capable of feeling, even if it was something as simple as the pain that came from a few stiff muscles.

He would walk back to the house he had grown up in. He would close the front door behind him, ignore the questions his mother was sure to ask him and make his way up the stairs, intent on hiding out in his room for the rest of the night. It wasn't that he enjoyed spending time in his room. In fact, he thought of the four walls that combined to make his child hood bedroom as more of a prison, trying to hold him inside. His soul was longing to break free, to sail away, but was hampered by the iron bars that had been placed on it by others.

Sora would wait in his hiding place, safely hidden in the shadows that now called the island their home, until Riku walked past him. It broke his heart to see how much his friend was hurting, but he had thought it was for the best if he just left things the way they were. Riku would resent the fact the Sora felt the need to watch over him and that would only hurt their already damaged relationship. Sora not only felt, he knew with a certainty that could only have come from observation, that he was losing his best friend.

Silently, Sora followed the path that Riku had walked only moments before, desperately trying to come up with a plan. With something, anything, he could do to keep from losing Riku. They had been friends as long as he could remember. Riku had always been a staple in his life. A rock, a lifeline, when things got too hard for him to handle. Someone who he was able to run to. Someone who was there to help him through anything. Now Riku needed him in return, and all he could do was follow him to the beach day after day and watch him, praying for the answers to come to him.

He had just started the journey home, where he planed to sit in the dining room with his mother, stepfather and step-brother and play happy family when the idea struck him. He would take the direct approach for once and confront Riku. He would stop by his house on the way home, barge into his room and demand that he spill his guts. It was time that the truth about what was bothering him came out.

Riku was laying on his bed staring blankly at his light blue ceiling, trying to make out the numerous cracks he knew resided there in the dim moon light that was coming in through his open window. He refused to get up and turn on a light, even if he knew he was only ruining his eyesight by trying to see without it. He preferred to stay blind. The more light that was shed on him the more clearly he would be able to see his owns flaws. His own insecurities. His own demons.

He could hear someone coming up the stairs. More like tromping up the stairs, he thought vaguely before he heard the same heavy footsteps turn and head in the direction of his door. His mother never bothered him once he was in his room. It was only when he happened to venture down stairs, into what he liked to call her realm, that she ever paid any attention to him.

The footsteps stopped a second before the sound of his door being slammed open filled the room. Riku sat up and blinked heavily, trying to make out the face of the person who had just invaded his private space. As his vision cleared, he could see the outline of Sora's spiky brown hair, followed by the outline of his strong features. Riku only had a moment to contemplate exactly what Sora would be doing at his house, or more precisely, what he would be doing barging into his room.

"Sora?" His voice held an air of surprise as he said the name, thinking that maybe he had finally gone crazy and was starting to imagine things.

"Heya Riku!" Sora said as he walked over to the end on the bed and plopped down on it. "What are you doing sitting around in the dark?"

"What are you doing here period?" The words came out harsher than Riku had meant for them to, but it was still a question that needed to be asked.

"Your best friend stops by to see you and all you feel the need to ask me what I'm doing here? Seriously Riku, have you forgotten all about me?" Sora asked, a fake expression of sadness crawling over his features.

"Of course not, but you haven't had anything to do with me for the past month, so excuse me if I'm slightly taken aback that you've suddenly decided to make time in your busy schedule for me." He knew it was rude, but the way he figured it he had one of two choices. Tell Sora the truth, or do whatever it took to get him to leave, to get the hell out of this blasted room he called his own and out of his life. No matter how much it would hurt Sora. No matter how much more of himself would die in the process.

"Yeah I know, I've kind of been busy with other things." Sora knew the hurtful words were nothing more then a tactic of Riku's to try and hurt him. To try anything to get him to give up on him and leave him in peace. Sora refused to give up on Riku now, not when he needed him the most. But still, there was a part of him deep inside that wondered if Riku really didn't think and feel those things.

"Yeah going to the mall or the beach every day with Kairi must be so hard. I don't know how you stand it." Riku knew that by bringing Kairi into the conversation he was taking a risk. Sora would either see how he had neglected one friend for the other, or he would get defensive and finally admit that Kairi really was more important to him than Riku.

"Riku." Sora was at a loss for anything to say. So that was what had been bothering him. Sora had been totally neglecting him in favor of spending time with Kairi. Time he had spent being dragged from store to store, holding on the clothes she wanted to try on and carrying the bags after she had made her purchases. Or time he had spent sitting on the beach watching her and her friends run around in the skimpy bathing suits they had chosen for the summer. Time he would much rather have spent with Riku.

"Don't you have some where to be? Like at your own home, pestering your own family?" Riku said with unneeded malice.

"I wanted to talk to you." Sora said, leaning forward on the bed, peering at Riku in the dark, trying to make out his expression. Hoping that maybe the look on his face would give away some hint as to what his true feelings were instead of this act he was currently putting on.

"You could have called you know, or have you forgotten my phone number?" He probably has, Riku thought. That's probably why he's here. He's too caught up in Kairi to even remember my phone number.

"Of course I remember your phone number! But if I had called you, you would have just blown me off! You would have insisted you were fine and I would have had no way of knowing if you were lying or not. I knew that if I were here, right in front of you, I'd be able to tell." Sora said with confidence. He knew his friend well enough to be able to tell if the words he spoke were true or not, or so he believed. He wanted, so badly to believe that he could tell the difference. "So tell me Riku, why are you lying to me? Why are you acting like it doesn't matter to you? When I know it does? Why are you acting like I don't matter to you?"

"Because it doesn't." The words came out before Riku could stop them. In all reality it did matter to him, more than he would ever be able to find the words to say.

"Stop lying!" Sora had reached his limit. He refused to accept the fact that his friendship no longer meant anything to Riku. That he no longer meant anything. "Why can't you just tell me the truth?"

"Why? Why do you want the truth so bad? What makes you think that it wouldn't be any worse than me lying to you?" Riku knew that if Sora knew the truth it would only make things worse. Only make the current situation that much more uncomfortable and that much harder to deal with.

"Because I thought you cared about me! And you don't lie to the people you care about!" Sora yelled as he stood up suddenly, unable to sit on the bed next to the person who he loved and cared for so much, but who continued to act as if he was nothing.

"You also don't blow off the people you supposedly care about!" Riku yelled, letting the words slip out of his mouth. He knew, at that moment, that the flood gate was about to open, and once it did, there would be no turning back.

"I wasn't blowing you off! You told me you needed time alone! So I was giving you time! I figured you would tell me when you were ready to start spending time together again, but apparently I was wrong." Now they were getting somewhere, Sora thought. Maybe now the truth would finally be able to come out.

"Tell me why in the world you would think I'd be interested in spending time with you and Kairi?" Riku asked. Ever since the events of two years ago Riku and Kairi had grown farther and farther apart, until finally the gap that was left between them was so wide, so far a part, that Sora wondered if it could ever be mended. He had felt as it he was the soul survivor of a hurricane that had left his two friends so badly damaged and so unable to forgive each other for actions that had been beyond anyone's control.

"Why do you think I've been avoiding you Sora? You want the truth? I can't stand to be around you! I can't stand to be in your presence when she's around, knowing that you would rather be with her, would rather spend time doing whatever in the hell it is that she does, than to be with me. You would rather sit and listen to her mindless rambling about absolutely nothing than spend time talking to me. And what really gets me, what really hurts, is the fact that you seem so damn happy about it all. You seem so care free when you're with her. I can't stand it because I know you'll never be able to be that way with me."

"You never pay attention to me Sora. You may think that you do. You may think that you see me when really; you only see what I allow you to see. I've hidden so much away inside of myself. So much that I'm afraid to show you. To tell you. You think you know me, that you know how to read me. But you don't. You know nothing about me, Sora. You don't know the real Riku, not the one I've been holding inside."

It was with that one simple confession that the damn burst open, never again would it be allowed to hold so much. Never again would it contain so much pent up emotion.

Sora just stood there, staring at his friend in the pale moonlight. Taking in the way the beams danced over his silver hair and played across his creamy white skin. The way his lips moved as he formed the words that would either break the two of them apart forever, or create a bond so strong it would never be broken.

"So that's why you've been going to the beach everyday." Sora whispered the words, confirming them with not only Riku but also himself.

"How do you know about that?" The look of surprise was once again evident on Riku's face as he tried to comprehend how Sora could possibly have known that he had been spending his afternoons at the beach.

"Because I've been following you." It was easy enough to admit now that things were finally starting to get out in the open, but still, Sora was worried of what effect the news might have on Riku.

"You've been following me?" The sound of disbelief came into his voice as the look of surprise became even more pronounced. He had no idea that the brunette had been with him, secretly watching over him from under the protection of the palm trees that lined the giant beach. "For how long?"

"Since I saw you walking towards it last Thursday." Sora spoke calmly, and realized that he had been keeping up his vigil for over a week. It hadn't seemed that long until then. Until he was standing in his best friend's dark bedroom that Saturday night, both admitting things to each other that they would rather have kept secret.

"Why?" The question came from Sora, after the room had fallen silent after his admittance.

"Why what?" Riku's head was bowed and turned to the side. Sora could see the right profile view of his face. The line of his strong jaw. The blunt tipped nose and the arched eyebrows. His hair falling down over his bright, unearthly green eyes, making him look more like a fallen angel than a boy who had simply lost his way.

"Why do you go there everyday?" It was a simple enough question, but the answer was anything but simple.

"Because. It's the only place I feel truly at peace." Riku stated. It was the truth after all, even if there was more to it than that.

"Is that it?" There has to be more to it than that, Sora thought. There was no way Riku would go and sit on the beach for hours on end on a daily basis simply because he felt at peace there.

"I can think there. I can work everything out in my head, or try to. There's no one around to bother me or to question to me. No one around expecting me to be something I'm not." The last part was probably unnecessary, but Riku said it anyway. "And because I can free my mind and think about the one who really matters."

"Well I'm so sorry for 'expecting' you to be something you're not!" Sora immediately went on the defensive, the last part of Riku's statement going directly over his head. He knew, somewhere he knew, it hadn't’ been aimed at him, but it still felt like it had been.

"Haven't you been listening to anything I've been saying?" Riku was starting to get tired of this conversation. Tried of trying to explain himself if Sora wasn't going to listen.

"You said there would be no one around to bother you so you could think!" Sora crossed his arms over his chest in a purely defensive manner. There was no way he was going to give in that easily. Riku was going to tell him what was going on, was going to fully explain it to him until he was satisfied that the entire truth had been told.

"I also said it gave me time to think about the one who really mattered." Riku's voice softened as he said the words, knowing the impact they could have if Sora were to realize their true meaning.

"I know what you said but that still doesn't..." Sora cut off mid sentence as Riku's words blew through him. Riku had been sitting down there on that beach every day for god knew how long, thinking about him. Because he had been so careless, only ever thinking about himself and Kairi. How important was Kairi really? And how could her importance ever have held a flame against the importance, the care, the love he had for Riku. Worse yet, how could he ever have let it?

"Riku." There it was, Sora's voice saying his name in that surprised yet understanding tone of voice. It still sounded so smooth, like honey dripping slowly from a spoon. How could it have still sounded so smooth, so beautiful, with all of the emotion it held? How could one name, one simple name said in the smooth voice have so much impact? But maybe it was the emotion, and the tone, and by god his own name being said in that voice that made it beautiful.

"Yes?" It came out as more of a croak than he had meant it to. More raspy than he had intended. He had, in reality, just admitted his deepest, darkest, best kept secret to the only person who had ever truly mattered to him, and now he felt as though he were standing before a court of law, waiting for judgement to be passed down on his confession.

"Why?" For the second time that night Sora uttered the same one worded question. "Why am I the one that matters to you?"

"Do you really need for me to answer that?" It seemed like a stupid question with the way Riku had been acting towards him lately, so cold and out of touch, but Riku didn't honestly think he would be able to find the words to describe what made Sora so special to him, let alone would he be able to get the words out.

"I think I would like to hear your reasoning, yes." Sora stared at Riku with a look in his eyes that had Riku been able to see it would have told him everything he needed to know. That Sora already knew all of the reasons he was special to him, and that he already knew all of the feelings Riku had been holding back and hiding from him, because he has been holding back and hiding his own set of feelings.

"Because of who you are. You always have to make sure that everything is okay with everyone and you won't rest, can't rest until you know that you've done everything in your power to make sure that it is. You care about everyone and love without holding back. You're everything I wish I was and long to be. You're everything that means something to me in this life." Riku already knew the words were inadequate. He knew there was no way they could ever live up to the true beauty that was Sora in his eyes.

"Why haven't you told me any of this before?" Before it had all been combined and built up inside of you until you couldn't even take looking at me anymore, Sora wondered? Until even being around me threatened the very lifeblood of the secret. Until it was too dangerous to spend any amount of time in my presence without the fear that it would all come spilling out of you before you could get a handle on it?

"God I don't know Sora, what reason could I possibly have had to keep the fact that I have feelings for my best friend a secret?" Riku stated, a hint of sarcasm making it's way into his voice.

"You know damn good and well what I mean!" Sora all but yelled it, wanting to know why Riku had never once felt comfortable enough to tell him the truth.

"Honestly? I thought you would freak. You'd be totally disgusted and never want to see me again. I could handle being around you all the time, or thought I could handle it, with you not knowing how I truly felt, but I couldn't handle you not being my friend anymore." He could have handled being around Sora, once he was able to get his feelings in check. He could have handled knowing that Sora was in love with some one else. He could even have handled seeing Sora happy with someone else. But he never could have handled losing Sora completely. He knew now that his reluctance to tell him, to tell Sora how he really felt had almost cost him their friendship anyway.

"You should have told me." Sora said quietly, knowing his own moment of truth was coming. It was time for him to finally do the same thing he had demanded of Riku.

"I couldn't." That was his only excuse, his only line of defense, and he knew it wasn't good enough.

"That's not going to work Riku. You could have. You could have told me. I know you think I would have flipped out on you and would have done something drastic like tell you I never wanted to see you again. I would never do either of those things. I want you in my life Riku. I need you in my life."

"Sora," Riku began, still not looking at the brunette. How could he after the confession he had just made? How could he ever look Sora in the eye again?

"Riku." There it was again, that calm, smooth voice, saying his name. It sounded like music to his ears. It was a sound he could hear every second of every day for the rest of his life and never tire of.

"Sora." He closed his eyes as he said the name and fought against the fear he felt deep in his heart. If he couldn't see, maybe the rejection wouldn't hurt as much.

"Riku, look at me." Sora whispered. He was ready to make his confession, to make his final plea to Riku to stop fearing what he felt. To stop fearing that Sora wouldn't feel the same way and would be able to open his eyes and see what was between them. To be able to open his heart and let Sora in.

"Come on Riku, look at me." Riku continued to stand there, eyes shut tight, afraid of what he might see if he opened them. Sora however, was not going to give up.

"Sora," Riku shook his head but he knew that fighting the request was futile. Opening his eyes slowly he turned his head and took in the sight before him. During the moments his eyes had been closed, Sora had moved across the carpeted floor soundlessly, and was now standing directly in front of him. So close in fact, that Riku could smell the scent of him. A wild mix of the salty beach air that seemed to hang over everything on the island, a strong, cool scent that he could only equate with something that was strictly Sora.

"Please, don't be afraid." Sora looked into Riku's eyes as he smiled. The moment of truth had come and Sora knew he was either going to soar, or fall directly on to his face.

"Sora." Was the only thing that Riku could not only think of to say, but it was the only thing that he could process. The name, and the fact that person who the named belong to was standing in front of him, staring at him with those startling blue eyes that could rival the sky.

"Don't think, just feel." Sora whispered before he closed his eyes, and eased forward, gently, ever so gently, placing his lips on Riku's. The feeling was less foreign than he had imagined it would be. He could feel more than see Riku's surprise as his face contorted before finally settling into the kiss, moving his lips against Sora's slowly, deepening the kiss slightly. In that moment he could feel all of the walls he had built around his heart, around his soul, not just falling, but crashing down, never to be rebuilt.

When Sora finally pulled away his beautiful face was flushed and he was slightly breathless. Opening his eyes he took in the slight of Riku standing in front of him, pink gracing his checks, his full pouty lips glistening in the moon light. He was the most beautiful, peaceful thing that Sora had ever laid eyes on. He knew in that moment, that he had never, would never, could never, love anyone the way he loved Riku in that moment.

Riku opened his eyes slowly and looked into Sora's. He still couldn't fully believe that he had just been kissed by his best friend. The person he had been in love with for as long as he could remember. Sighing in pure bliss, he decided that it was time to take a risk. Closing his eyes once more, he placed a hand on Sora's hip while the other wrapped around Sora's neck, hand resting at the base of his skull, fingers wrapped in chestnut brown hair. He once again closed the distance between his lips and Sora's.

The kiss was different than the one before it. Less innocent but with the same feeling, only replacing the innocence with a passion that nothing would ever be able to compare to. Riku could feel Sora's arms wrap around him, one coming up take a hold of his own hair in the slim fingers, while the other rested near his waist, fingers tightening to grasp the fabric of his shirt when his mouth opened and his tongue snaked out to caress Sora's bottom lip.

Sora opened his mouth a second after feeling Riku's tongue slide across his lip. His own tongue began to dance against Riku's, allowing him to take dominance over his own. He moaned into the kiss as he felt Riku pressing against him. He knew that nothing would ever come close to this moment. This moment where he could taste the unique flavor that was Riku's own. A mix of the vanilla toothpaste he used and the gummie bears he was obsessed with. His fingers were embedded in silky silver hair, and hands roamed over his body, exploring, leaving feather light touches over his overly sensitive body.

Riku finally pulled himself away slowly, knowing that if he took this moment too far he wasn't going to be able to stop. The entire situation was overwhelming. Sora was standing in front of him, lips swollen from their passionate kissing, cheeks flushed from excitement. It took all the will power that Riku had to keep himself from pressing Sora against the wall and taking him. Of touching him in places that would make him moan. Running his tongue over every sensitive spot on his body until he was begging Riku to slide inside of him. Until he was wet and weeping, and then Riku would take him, pound into him until he screamed from the pleasure and intensity of it all.

Sora could feel his heart pounding against his ribs, threatening to break out of his chest. His breath was coming in short pants and he knew he was sweating. Sora closed his eyes once again and pushed himself against Riku, rubbing his growing erection against the older boys before bringing the other into another searing kiss. Lips moved against each other, tongues sliding out to taste and to take. Hands wondered as the whole situation suddenly moved from being a heart felt talk between friends into something more, something deeper. Both boys knew, somewhere through the passionate, sexually charged haze that there would be no going back. No matter how far they took this, there would be no turning back. The option of turning back had vanished when Sora had placed his lips against Riku's.

"Sora," Riku sighed his named as he pulled away reluctantly. "We have to stop this."

"Why?" Sora asked lazily as he moved to nuzzle into Riku's neck, his heavy breathing grazing over the pulse point that rested there, making Riku groan. "Don't you like kissing me?"

"God yes." Riku moaned it as the heavy breaths were replaced by Sora’s lips, placing kisses over his heated flesh. "You're really good at this, aren't you?"

"Mmm hmmm." Sora moaned before tracing his tongue over the strong line of Riku's neck; moving up to run his warm, wet tongue over the shell of his ear.

"Had a lot of practice have you?" Riku asked just barely managing a laugh.

"No." Sora denied the thought instantly as he kissed the spot under Riku's ear, making him moan. "I've just imagined this so many times in my mind. I feel like I know every inch of you. I've pictured exploring your body so many times, using my fingers, my hands, my mouth."

"Have you?" Riku couldn't hide the surprise in his voice or on his face.

"I imagined you having a sweet spot right about here." Sora moved his mouth down to the edge of Riku's collarbone and began to suck on the skin there. When the action earned a gasp from the older boy along with slender fingers weaving themselves through his hair, he knew that his imagination had been right. He let go of the now bruised flesh and ran his tongue over it before placing a soft kiss on the damaged skin. Moving back up to Riku's mouth, he placed his wet lips on his and brought him once again into a deep kiss, this time snaking his tongue out to ghost over Riku's before taking his bottom lip into his mouth and sucking on it slightly, before biting it gently.

"Sora, seriously. We have to stop this." Once Sora had pulled away once again. He knew it wasn't going to be much longer before his self-control was going to be totally gone. This was the moment he had been waiting for since the day he had realized that what he felt for Sora was much then just a simple crush.

"Why?" The word came out sounding more like a challenge then a question.

"Because if we don't stop now I'm not going to be able to." Riku held his breath as Sora pressed against him again, and even through the layers of fabric Riku could feel Sora's hard cock rubbing against his. The thought of it, of what it meant, was enough to drive him crazy.

"Who says I want to stop?" Sora teased as his tongue once again began to explore Riku's neck, his hands moving under the hem of his shirt to graze over the sensitive skin of his stomach.

Hearing Sora say that, that he actually wanted this to happen, that he was okay with it, was all the encouragement that Riku needed. He wrapped his arms around Sora, hands busying themselves exploring, leaving feather light touches over heated skin, his hot, wet mouth attacking Sora's. He could feel his legs, numb and as unreal as they seemed, move towards the bed, moving until Sora was backed up against it, his knees flush with the edge. All he would have to do was simply push the brunette down and he would be spread out before him. Ready and willing to take whatever Riku would give him, and more than capable of dishing it back out as well.

Sora moaned as he felt Riku's hand move under his shirt, pressing his cool hands against the warm flesh of his back. He was vaguely aware of the fact that Riku had moved them so he was against the bed. He could feel it against the back of his knees, waiting to catch him when he fell onto its soft surface. He could feel Riku's tongue sliding over the skin of his neck before his teeth bite down gently, leaving his mark on the delicate skin that lay directly under his right ear. Sora relished in knowing that Riku was marking him as his own. Yes, Sora repeated over and over in his mind, yes, I am yours. Take me. I want to be yours so badly. I want to make you feel things you never knew were possible. I want to show you what love is, what it can be. What we can be.

Riku grabbed a hold of the hem of Sora's shirt and pulled away from the heated kiss long enough to pull the shirt over Sora's head, revealing a long, lean chest and torso. The milky skin shimmered in the moonlight. Goose bumps began to form on the exposed flesh as the cool night air flowed in from the open window. Riku's mouth found it's way to an already hardened nipple, taking it into his mouth and sucking gently, before tracing the bumpy surface with his tongue, making Sora's eyes roll back in his head even as the moans were pulled past his lips. He could feel Riku's tongue tracing patterns into the skin of his chest, moving lower down his toned stomach, dipping into the crevice of his belly button.

Sora's fingers embedded themselves once again in Riku's silver hair, as Riku's own slender fingers found the clasp of Sora's jeans. His fingers worked the belt buckle loose, before moving to the golden button of the jeans. Pushing the button through the small slit he pulled the zipper down, loosening the pressure on Sora's now painfully hard erection.

It wasn't until he felt Riku's fingers slide underneath the denim and tug that Sora knew, truly and fully, that this was real. This was really happening. There could be no turning back now. Everything he had always imagined, everything he had ever dreamed, ever wanted, ever needed, was finally coming true. It was finally happening. If he had known, if he had ever thought for a moment that Riku could possibly have returned his feelings he would have acted on them sooner, so much sooner.

Riku had taken to his knees in the effort to rid Sora of his many articles of offending clothing. He carefully pulled the dark denim down over pale, smooth legs, admiring the lean muscle of his thighs and calves. Carefully he removed the sandals that Sora had been wearing and threw them to the other side of the room, causing one of them to bounce off the wall and come crashing down onto the monitor of his computer. Neither boy seemed to notice, even if they did, neither had the capacity to care as Riku's lips were once again pressed against Sora's.

Riku's lips were painting a wet trail over the sensitive skin on Sora's neck, causing sparks of pleasure to surge through his body as teeth dug into the skin of his shoulder. Riku was desperate to mark Sora as his own. To leave some sort of reminder that from this moment on, he belonged to him, and only him. He could feel the way the brunette's breath sped up as he sucked on his collarbone, eager to leave as many bruises on his once pristine skin as possible. He could feel the way he shivered as his fingers moved over his still boxer-clad erection. He could hear the moans that escaped his throat.

Sora's hands slide down Riku's back to the hem of his shirt, wanting desperately to rid him of the blasted thing, to finally feel the heated skin that lay beneath it on his own. To be pressed against his new lover, with no barriers in the way. They had conquered so many barriers up to that point, and Sora wanted to put as many behind them as he possibly could. He wanted nothing to stand between him and Riku. Not emotionally nor physically. He wanted to feel Riku, to touch Riku in every way possible. He wanted for Riku to accept him into his heart, the same was he had already accepted him into his own. The same way he was about to accept him into his body.

"Riku." The name came out breathless, but was enough to catch the older boys attention. Stopping his assault on Sora's slender neck long enough to look up, into the boys eyes, searching for any sign that Sora had changed his mind. Praying, hoping, that he hadn't, but ready, willing to accept the decision if it came.

Instead of the rejection he had been waiting for he was greeted by Sora pulling his shirt over his head and flinging it across the room to join his sandal on top of the monitor. There was a moment when Riku thought, briefly, that in any other situation the sight would have been comical, but not now. Not when Sora's nimble fingers were working on the buckle of his own belt, loosening it, and moving on to the button of his jeans. Not when's Sora's tongue was tracing over the shell of his ear, biting gently on the lobe. Not when Sora's hand moved to his hips, tugging the fabric down so it pooled into a heap at the floor. Stepping out of the now tangled jeans, he used his right foot to kick them away from him, emitting a dull thumping noise as they hit his bedroom door.

Sora gasped as he felt Riku's erection pressing against his own. He shuddered as Riku ground his hips into his own, causing their dicks to rub against one another's, sending waves of indescribable pleasure through both of their bodies. He sighed when finally; Riku pushed him down on to the bed. He could feel his feet come out from under him and vaguely wondered why he was falling, until he felt the silky material of the sheets under him, cooling the heated skin of his back. He landed, and immediately moved up on the bed, using his arms and legs to move himself until his head was even with the pillows. Placing his head on the soft pillow and looked up through his dark eyelashes to see Riku, still standing at the foot of the bed, staring at him. Lust was apparent in his sparkling green eyes, as was the flush that graced his lips and the spit that glistened on his swollen lips. Even in the dark Sora could see the marks he had left on his neck and shoulder's. Just as desperate, just as needy to mark Riku as his own.

"Riku?" Sora questioned, wondering why the silver haired boy hadn't joined him on the bed. Why he wasn't as eager to go further, to complete this act that they had begun to admit. He was silenced as Riku placed a finger to his lips, motioning for Sora to be quiet. His eyes moved towards the dresser that resided on the wall beside the bed, and moving towards it, opened the top drawer and removed a small, clear tube. Placing it on the table beside the bed for later use, he climbed on to the bed.

"Are you completely sure about this?" He asked as he knelt beside the younger boy, wanting to make certain that there would be no regrets. That this was something they both wanted beyond a shadow of a doubt. He had to be certain, he had to be sure. "There's still time to turn back you know."

"Riku, there is nothing in this world that could make me turn back now. I'm sure. I want you." Sora reached for Riku's hand in the dark, grasping it in his own, intertwining their fingers, hoping to give reassurance in a physical touch as well as vocally. "Now will you please stop messing around and just fuck me already?"

He could see Riku smile in the dark at his obvious impatience before the silver haired boy leaned down and placed a kiss on Sora's fore head. A gesture of innocence. A gesture of understanding. But above all a gesture of love. He swung his leg over Sora's waist so he was straddling the slightly smaller boy, and once again began to attack his neck with his tongue, with his teeth. He could feel Sora's erection pressing against his ass and finding himself unable to pass up the opportunity to tease, he rocked back, knowing that his ass would grind into the erection behind it, earning a loud moan from Sora.

Nipping gently at Sora's earlobe, he reached over for the lube he had placed on the table just moments before, and began to trace his tongue down the line of Sora's body once again. Down his chest, taking time to play his lips and tongue over his nipples, lavishing attention on both of them. Teasing them both into hard peaks, before moving down to his stomach, placing soft kisses over the skin causing goose bumps to erupt over the once smooth surface. When he reached the hem of the black boxers that acted as a barrier, keeping him from reaching his goal, he ran his tongue over the skin that showed directly above it, testing and teasing, seeing how far he could take it before Sora couldn't stand it anymore. Some part of him, some part he had thought was buried deep inside of him, so deep it would never be able to surface, wanted to hear Sora beg. Wanted it so he could know, even if no one else knew, that Sora was weak. Weaker than anyone else was ever allowed to see.

But just by letting Riku in, just by letting Riku do the things he was currently doing, Sora was showing a certain weakness, and Riku knew that. He knew it took both strength and weakness to love. His fingers slide beneath the cotton of Sora's boxers and tugged them down slowly, causing them to rub against his already painfully hard cock, sending waves of pleasure through the brunette, causing his to moan.

"Dear God." They were the only words that Sora could still remember if you didn’t count his own name and Riku's. Every thought was gone from his mind, except for the fact that he was here, in Riku's bedroom, about to lose his virginity to his best friend.

"Why so formal? You can just call me Riku." The chuckle that escaped Riku's lips set shock waves through Sora's body, even as the joke was wasted on him. All he could feel was Riku's breath ghosting over his weeping erection. Smiling, Riku leaned down and placed a soft kiss on the head of Sora's cock, causing the younger boy to arch his back slightly as another moan escaped his lips.

Placing his hands on the smaller boys slim hips to keep them in place, Riku took the head of Sora's cock into his mouth, running his tongue over the slit, causing a series of curses and moans to be expelled from the receiving party. Taking as much of the length as he could, he worked his tongue over the bumps and ridges, before applying a gentle suction, not wanting to take Sora too far. He wanted to give him as much pleasure as possible.

Moving to run his tongue over the vein that resides on the underside of Sora's cock, he could hear the strangled gasp the brunette released as he maneuvered over the extremely pleasurable spot. Running his tongue over back up and over the slit, he could feel the tremors that racked Sora's body as he once again enveloped his dick. He could feel the head hit the back of his throat, and fighting against this currently very prominent gag reflex, allowed Sora's cock to slide into his throat, until he fully encased in the tight, wet heat.

Sora moaned as he felt the Riku hum, sending waves and tremors through his cock, making him moan. His hands were fisted tight, gripping the bunched sheets in pleasure. His entire body was shaking with the impact of what was happening blew through him. His cock was encased in Riku's mouth. His right hand was embedded in Riku's soft hair, pulling softly, as he was moaning loudly. Bright burst of colors and light were exploding beneath his tightly shut eyelids. Everything he was, everything he would be, was contained in that moment.

It was only when Riku pulled away slowly, running his tongue over the shaft of Sora's cock before placing a chaste kiss on the top that Sora realized what was happening. He opened his eyes to see Riku knelling between his spread legs, reaching over him for the lube that he had placed on the pillow beside his head. It was also in that moment that reality of what was about to happen actually set in. Sure, Sora knew the mechanics of sex between males, but he had never experienced it. He could only hope that Riku knew what he was doing.

It was also in that moment that he realized that Riku was still wearing his dark blue boxers, and immediately set about rectifying the situation. Hooking his thumbs into the thick elastic waistband, he tugged gently, pulling the fabric over Riku’s weeping erection. He was greeted by the sound he had imagined so many times. The sound of Riku moaning his name. Quietly, barely even audible if he hadn't been listening for it. It was exactly how he had imagined it, and he relished in the fact that he had actually made Riku moan. Calm, cool, collected Riku, and he wanted, needed, to hear that sound again. He was also greeted by a sight he had imagined so many times. The sight of Riku's cock, hard and ready, and Sora took pride in knowing he was the cause of that. He had made Riku that hard. He had done that. It was also in the moment that the thought finally crossed his mind. Riku was fucking huge, and there was no was in hell he was ever going to fit inside of him.

He felt the mattress shift as Riku's weight was lifted from it, as he stood up long enough to remove his boxers, leaving them in a pile on the floor. Crawling back onto the bed, he returned to his spot between Sora's legs. He relocated the bottle of lube and flipped the cap open, pouring a small amount into his palm, before carefully closing the bottle and laying it beside him, knowing he would need it again.

"Are you ready?" He already knew the answer, knew that there would be no turning back. Still, he felt the need to ask. *He had wanted to ask. He wanted, needed, to make sure that Sora was okay at every step. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Sora, either physically or emotionally.

"More than ready." The words came out as more of sigh than anything else. He had been waiting so long for this, been wanting this for so long, there could have been no other answer possible.

Carefully swiping his index and middle fingers through the quickly spreading puddle of lube, he coated both of them liberally. Using his now free hand, he encouraged Sora to bend his legs at the knee, giving him better access to the area he was so desperately seeking. Slowly, carefully, he began to caress the taunt, round buttocks of Sora's ass, before sliding the tip of his index finger past the lips, teasing at the tight ring of muscle that lay there. Feeling Sora relax, he pushed his finger inside the tight, warm heat and struggled to suppress a moan. He could feel Sora's muscles contract around his finger as his entire body tightening, seizing up around the foreign entity that had entered it.

"Relax." Riku whispered, trying to get his younger lover to calm down, knowing it would be all the more painful if he was tense. "Relax. It will feel good I promise. It will feel so good you won't even be able to remember the pain."

He heard Sora take a deep breath and begin to relax at his words. Slowly, he began to work his slick finger in and out of Sora's tight hole, loosening it, preparing it for what was to come. He could feel the muscles stretching slightly around his finger, moving to accommodate him. He could hear Sora's breathing speed up, a sign that not only was he getting used to the feeling of having Riku's finger in his ass, but he was also starting to enjoy it. Pulling the finger out slowly, Riku heard a low whine emit from Sora's throat, but the sound was quickly replace by a groan as he slide his finger back inside, the time accompanied by his longer middle finger.

Sora felt a sharp, searing pain flow through his body as Riku added a second finger. He could feel his muscles begin to seize up, trying to fight against the invading force. Taking a deep breath, he struggled to relax, just as Riku had told him to. He had to believe that what Riku said was true. That soon the pain would cease and it would feel good. He knew there had to be something good in it for the bottom, or else no one would ever choose to be one, and he knew many people did.

It was moments later that Sora found out just why men choose to not only be the bottom, but actually enjoyed it as Riku's fingers brushed over his prostate, bringing the bright colors and lights swirling back across his closed eyelids. A moan was torn from his lips as Riku, having found the much sought after spot, brushed the tips of his fingers out the bundle of nerves once more, pulling a string of curses and moans from Sora. He was going to die, Sora thought. He was going to die right there in that bed, with Riku's magical fingers dancing over his prostate, giving him more pleasure than he ever would have thought possible.

He could feel his back arching up off of the mattress as Riku's brushed over the spot once again, before his fingers pulled out of his tight hole completely. Sora couldn't help but whine at the loss of contact. It wasn't until he felt Riku's fingers return, this time three instead of the previous two, that he realized what was coming next. He could feel Riku's fingers moving, wiggling in different directions, trying to strength and prepare him as much as possible. Finally forcing himself to open his eyes, he was greeted by a sight that would forever be burned into his memory. Riku on his knees between his legs, leaning over him. Left hand on his hip, keeping his hips stilled. His right hand was moving, leading his fingers in and out of his ass. It should have been disgusting, Sora thought. If it had been any one except Riku it would have been. But it was Riku, and for some reason Sora would never be able to fathom, the sight was turning him on even more.

"Riku." The name had become his constant mantra that night, and now he used it to break the older boys concentration. To bring his attention away from the sight in front of him and up to Sora's face. "It's not that I'm not enjoying what your doing, because believe me, I am. I really fucking am. But do you think that you could, you know, fuck me now?"

It was by the dirtiest thing Sora had ever said, and Riku smiled at being the one it had been said to. He smiled even more knowing that Sora was ready. He had been fighting against his own wants and needs. Fighting with all the strength he had not to just give up on preparing his friend and instead just pounding into him. Entering him roughly and slamming into him until the pain became pleasure. Until the screams for him to stop became screams begging him to continue. To give him more. To go harder, deeper.

Relocating the bottle of lube, he flipped the top open once again and poured even more into his waiting palm. He knew that Sora would be well lubed from his fingers, but still, he wanted his entrance to be as smooth and painless as possible. It was going to hurt Sora enough, having him enter him for the first time. After all, his dick was a hell of a lot bigger than his fingers. He moaned as his hand finally made contact with his neglected cock. He could feel his breath hitch in his throat as the pleasure rushed through him. Running his palm over the underside before wrapping his hand around his dick, he slide down the length and back up a few times, trying to coat every part of it. He could see the pre cum dripping from the slit, and knew that he could easily get lost in his own touches, even knowing that something better, so much better, was waiting for him.

Finally satisfied with his work, he smiled at Sora, before leaning down and placing a soft kiss on his lips. He could feel Sora's hands wrap around his back, one coming up to tangle in his hair, holding him in place. He moaned as his cock rubbed over Sora's. Breaking the kiss, he moved back to he was knelling in front of him. Carefully, he took Sora's legs and wrapped them around his waist, before realigning his own body on top of Sora's, even as he took himself in hand once more, and gently guiding himself into Sora's tight opening.

Sora could feel the tip of Riku's dick enter him, along with the blinding pain that rushed through him. He tired to keep his eyes open, to keep them focused on Riku's face hovering over him. Tired to focus on the feeling of Riku's body on his. He could feel Riku's lips moving against his ear, telling him to relax. Reminding him of how good it could feel, how good it would feel if only he were to relax. Taking a deep breath, Sora forced his body to relax. Turning his head to the side, he opened his eyes and focused on the rays of moonlight flowing in from the window.

Feeling the boy under him relax, Riku began to push through the tight ring of muscles, burying himself in the tight, wet heat. He could feel Sora trembling beneath him, both with the pain of being entered for the first time, and with the struggle to relax. Stopping, halfway encased in the heaven that he knew was waiting for him, he moved his mouth from Sora’s ear down to his neck. Sucking and biting gently, trying to make the boy forget about the searing pain he was experiencing.

Sora could feel Riku's tongue tracing patterns on his neck, and closed his eyes as the pleasure fought against the pain. He could feel Riku shaking with the effort of keeping still, of not going any farther than he was ready for. Turning his head, he once again embedded his fingers in Riku's hair, and brought his face to his. The kiss was passionate, hard and burning, and all off the encouragement that Riku needed. Slowly he continued his assent, until finally, he was fully encased inside of Sora. He could feel himself sinking inside of the warmth of the younger boy. It was as if he had entered much more than just his physical being. It was as if a door had been opened and he had walked right into the very soul that resided inside of Sora. Right into the very heart that Sora had kept so closely guarded.

It was amazing, Sora thought. The two of them fit together so perfectly. He could feel Riku's hip resting against his own. He could feel his right hand on his hip, fingernails digging half moons into the once unmarred skin. He could hear the quick inhalations of breath on his neck. He felt as if he were the one inside of Riku, inside of the other way around. In that very moment, when the two of them had come together, melted into one in the dark, everything had changed. Everything had come together.

"Are you okay?" Riku's voice came out as a moan, but he still had to make sure that Sora was okay. It was taking all the self-control he had to just stay there, unmoving. The pressure on his dick was almost unbearable, but he was willing to bear anything, he would do anything, to keep from hurting Sora.

"Mmmmm hhhmmmm." He could feel the vibrations of the hummed admittance all the way down into his toes. Taking a deep breath, he pulled out slowly, until only the tip was still inside of Sora, before sliding back down to the hilt. The moan that escaped his lips was like magic to Sora's ears. It was, by far, the sweetest sound he had ever heard in his entire life, and he knew he would do anything to hear that sound again.

Sora could feel Riku sliding in and out of him, the same way he could feel the steady rhythm of his heart pounding in his chest. He could feels his lips moving on his skin, whispering words that he couldn't hear, and if he did he wouldn't have been able to understand. He could feel his own cock, softened from the pain, hardening again as it was rubbed against his own stomach every time Riku thrust into him. He could feel the sweat forming on both of their bodies, even as the wind blew into the room from the open window and chilled the air.

He could feel the tremors shoot through his body as Riku changed angles suddenly and found that spot once again. He could feel the tip of Riku's dick push against it with every thrust, even as the lights swirled behind his eyes once again. He could feel his fingers nails scrape along Riku's back, leaving angry red scratches along the pale surface, causing delectable pain to shoot through Riku's body, only driving him harder. He could feel the tightening in his belly, even before the world explored around him. He could feel his entire body tingle, even as he cried out. Even as he moaned Riku's name.

He could feel himself explode. It felt as if the world was falling down around him, and nothing, no amount of force was going to stop it. He could feel his legs shake as he struggles to keep them wrapped around Riku's waist, even as the muscles in his thighs, his calves, his entire body went lax. Even as the stars exploded behind his eyes and blinded him. Even as he felt his heart hammer in his chest and his breathing reduced to pants. This is what dying felt like, he was sure of it. Somehow, even in that moment, he knew that if he were to die right, he would go happily. His life was complete.

As the world fell around Sora, Riku could feel all of his fantasies, all of his deepest hopes and dreams coming true. Even as the sticky substances of Sora's release erupted over both of their stomachs he knew that nothing could ever have made this more perfect. He was here, with Sora. Sora was under him, around him, moaning his name, clinging to him. As the already tight muscles clenched around him, he knew there was no way he could hold on. Giving himself over to the same blinding pleasure Sora had succumbed to only moments before, he moaned into Sora's neck, sending vibrations down the small boys body. He could feel Sora's lips kissing a line down his neck, even as his release was milked from him. The combination of Sora's muscles working around his cock, and his tongue licking a wet trail up Riku's neck caused him to simply let go.

Sora could feel the explosion even as Riku experienced it. He could feel the white, hot seed filling him in long spurts. This, he thought was what being complete felt like. His own hands were wrapped around Riku's neck, buried in his hair, holding him close to him. Feeling what his body shook with its release. The way his breath hitched in his throat. The way he moaned his name.

He could feel himself falling. He buried his head in Sora's hair, even as he murmured things that neither of them understood. He could feel both of the hearts pounding against he other, even as he pulled his now flaccid cock out of Sora's ass.

Riku laid his head on Sora's sweaty chest and felt the beat of his heart against his chest. They were both desperately trying to catch their breath. It was as if a lump had been shoved into his throat, and for some reason, Riku could feel tears pricking his eyes. What if this was all a dream? Or worse yet, what if Sora woke up in the morning and realized that all of this had been a mistake. What if he woke up and realized he regretted it? That, Riku knew, would hurt worse than full out rejection would have.

Sora could feel the hot tears as they ran down Riku's check and soaked into his already slick skin. He knew what the silver haired boy was thinking. He had thought the same thing. What if Riku realized that he didn't really want Sora? Or what if he woke up and realized that he had already gotten what he wanted? Sora knew it was all very possible, but still, he had to think positive. Thinking negatively would get him nowhere, and fast.

"Hey," He began, leaning his head down to place a soft kiss on the top of Riku's head, breathing in the fresh scent of his hair. "It's okay. I'm right there. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

"I know." Riku said shakily, trying to gain control over his emotions. He wasn't an emotional person, but when it came to Sora, everything he had been, every thing he thought he was, was different. Sora made him want to be different, he made him want to be better.

"You know, I wonder what everyone is going to think." Sora chuckled at the thought. No one in their circle of friends would ever have imagined that one of them, none the less both of them were homosexual. Hell, they hadn't even known the truth about each other until just a short time ago.

"Well that depends on how we choose to tell people. Do you want to make it quick and easy, or shocking and surprising?" Riku asked, as he felt Sora's fingers begin to dance a path over his scalp, running through his hair easily.

"Shocking and surprising works. Besides, I want to see what the look on Kairi's face when she finds out." Sora chuckles, imagining the sight of Kairi's eyes bugging out of her head.

"I want to see the look on her face the first time she sees us kiss." Riku added knowing that the idea of kissing in public would make Sora blush. The tears had dried now, leaving behind a beautiful post orgasmic bliss.

"We'll have to get someone to take a picture of it for us, you know, to keep a memento." Sora joked, knowing that he could get Roxas to do the deed if he were to only ask. After all Roxas had never particularly liked Kairi, and anytime he could have a hand in shocking her, he was more than willing to participate.

"And just who were you thinking about having operate the camera?" Riku had read the look on Sora's face. That smirk could only have come from him thinking deliciously evil thoughts that could include Roxas.

"He would do it to. Him and Axel would do it, and then make copies of it and hand it out." Sora joked as Riku moved to lie beside him. Sora wrapped his arms around his new lover and snuggled down into his chest, enjoying the warmth that radiated from him.

"That's what I'm worried about." Riku chucked as he reached down and pull the covers over their bodies.

"You know you would love that. Having everyone know I'm yours." Sora sighed, knowing that he to would enjoy having the world know that Riku was his, finally.

"So, I guess that means we're together now, right?" Riku still unsure of exactly what the status of their relationship was.

"Of course we are silly! I didn't just give up my virginity to you to blow you off in the morning!" Sora exclaimed as he shoved a hand into Riku's chest.

"Sora!" The information wasn't that much of a surprise, but he still wanted to act the part for his friend.

"Oh shut up. You knew it. Hell, the whole island probably knows it. But not anymore!" Sora couldn't help but giggle at the thought even as he reached up and placed a soft kiss on Riku's lips.

Riku laughed, but still couldn't help but notice the innocence his friend still seemed to radiate. He wanted that to last for as long as possible. Even though he was going to have a hand in taking it from him, he still wanted to do it as gently and as slowly as possible. Even though all of his hopes and dreams had come true, he knew that there was so much more to come. He also cursed himself for ever being so stupid. The two of them could have had weeks, months, maybe even years together.

From that moment on, Riku would never again go to the beach alone. He would never again sit on the warm sand and stare out the horizon and wonder about how things could be if he only had the courage to tell the person he loved his true feelings. Never again would Sora follow him and wonder why his friend was acting so strangely, and if, by change, him confessing his own set of feelings would make things any better. Where ever they went now, they would never be alone.