[Application] Luigi Mario, There Will Be Brawl
[[OOC: This Luigi's taken from the webseries There Will Be Brawl, so expect a darker take on him. And first person perspective. He's taken while he's unconscious from events in the final episode. Spoilers for the series abound.]]
I woke up in some castle I had never seen before. I had no idea how I had gotten there. The last thing I recalled was throwing Gannondorf's head off the roof before the world went black.
I sat up, looking at my surroundings. This castle, it was a lot cheerier than anything back at home. Could it be that I was borne away from the Mushroom Kingdom? Or had I lost my life and this is the afterlife?
I looked down at myself. No injuries, no sign that Kirby had tried to eat me, nothing of the psychic strain the butchers put me through, no sign that I tried to blow myself up to kill them all. Perhaps this is the afterlife after all. Funny. I always imagined more Boos.
Something poked me in the back. I turned around but saw no one. Then I saw a quill moving of its own accord, pointing to an application.
State your full name.
Now I knew I wasn't in the Mushroom Kingdom. Even if we were fallen heroes the name of the Mario Brothers was still a well known one, so had this been the Mushroon Kingdom this question would be unnecessary.
"Luigi. Luigi Mario."
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Strange. Why that question. "I don't have a favorite. These day I eat what I can afford."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Neither of those names sounded familiar to me at all. "I'm sorry, but I don't know who these people are."
3. What time is it where you are?
"It had been nighttime the last I knew. I couldn't tell you the exact time. Things had been...chaotic."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
I frowned. Why this question? Did whatever forces were in play here find out about me and Peach? I latched onto the part I had no problem talking about. "I'm afraid I don't know what this Order of the Phoenix is."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
I grimaced. The memory of Mario beating that gorilla almost to death, and Dedede's guts spilled everywhere was still fresh in my mind. "I wouldn't." That would be cruel. "I vowed to help my brother quit drinking, and that would enable him."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
"I wouldn't know much about these things." I once had hoped to marry Daisy, but Kirby put a stop to that. "But I think he should marry for love."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Recalling Gannondorf's description of how Hyrule fell, I said, "Perhaps you are a bureaucrat."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Now this was a sore spot. Long ago I would have listed my achievements with pride. Now? There are things I have done that I am not proud of.
I took a breath. "I have saved the Mushroom Kingdom a few times. I've put Kirby the Cannibal away in prison. I believe I have killed him and the two Butchers right before I came here." That is all I'm willing to say. The mushroom dealing, bribery, and indirect bombing (long story) I am not.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Confused, I look in my pockets. I didn't exactly plan on needing to bribe; I was in a takeover. I did find some coins in my pocket.
"I have some coins."
"I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___LM_________
I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. _LM__________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ____LM_______.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ___LM__________"
I woke up in some castle I had never seen before. I had no idea how I had gotten there. The last thing I recalled was throwing Gannondorf's head off the roof before the world went black.
I sat up, looking at my surroundings. This castle, it was a lot cheerier than anything back at home. Could it be that I was borne away from the Mushroom Kingdom? Or had I lost my life and this is the afterlife?
I looked down at myself. No injuries, no sign that Kirby had tried to eat me, nothing of the psychic strain the butchers put me through, no sign that I tried to blow myself up to kill them all. Perhaps this is the afterlife after all. Funny. I always imagined more Boos.
Something poked me in the back. I turned around but saw no one. Then I saw a quill moving of its own accord, pointing to an application.
State your full name.
Now I knew I wasn't in the Mushroom Kingdom. Even if we were fallen heroes the name of the Mario Brothers was still a well known one, so had this been the Mushroon Kingdom this question would be unnecessary.
"Luigi. Luigi Mario."
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Strange. Why that question. "I don't have a favorite. These day I eat what I can afford."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Neither of those names sounded familiar to me at all. "I'm sorry, but I don't know who these people are."
3. What time is it where you are?
"It had been nighttime the last I knew. I couldn't tell you the exact time. Things had been...chaotic."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
I frowned. Why this question? Did whatever forces were in play here find out about me and Peach? I latched onto the part I had no problem talking about. "I'm afraid I don't know what this Order of the Phoenix is."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
I grimaced. The memory of Mario beating that gorilla almost to death, and Dedede's guts spilled everywhere was still fresh in my mind. "I wouldn't." That would be cruel. "I vowed to help my brother quit drinking, and that would enable him."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
"I wouldn't know much about these things." I once had hoped to marry Daisy, but Kirby put a stop to that. "But I think he should marry for love."
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Recalling Gannondorf's description of how Hyrule fell, I said, "Perhaps you are a bureaucrat."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Now this was a sore spot. Long ago I would have listed my achievements with pride. Now? There are things I have done that I am not proud of.
I took a breath. "I have saved the Mushroom Kingdom a few times. I've put Kirby the Cannibal away in prison. I believe I have killed him and the two Butchers right before I came here." That is all I'm willing to say. The mushroom dealing, bribery, and indirect bombing (long story) I am not.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Confused, I look in my pockets. I didn't exactly plan on needing to bribe; I was in a takeover. I did find some coins in my pocket.
"I have some coins."
"I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___LM_________
I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. _LM__________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ____LM_______.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ___LM__________"