Memo to Ron WeasleydamnfinecupofOctober 7 2007, 06:28:35 UTC
TO: Ron Weasley FROM: Special Agent Dale Cooper RE: 'Furries'
Werewolves? They're a thing of the past. Technically speaking they're also a thing of the present, but they no longer threaten Hogwarts per se. No, the real peril facing us is the threat of face-eating cats.
Face-eating cats are furry.
Are these furries, by any chance, cats or catlike?
Re: Memo to Ron WeasleydungbombsruleOctober 7 2007, 06:34:14 UTC
Ron didn't quite get Cooper's memo system, but to stay on his good side, he mimicked it. Unfortunately, while he did that, he still added the old fashion way of salutations and goodbyes. Also to stay on his good side, Ron didn't ask what made Dale so special, anyway.
To: Special Agent Dale Cooper From: Ron Weasley Re: Re: 'Furries'
Dear Special Agent Dale Cooper,
I'm not sure werewolves were threatening Hogwarts before, but ok. Wait, you mean those face-eating- I mean, those cats that just started appearing, like, over a year ago or something like that? Those things always rubbed me the wrong way. Don't tell me they did something!
Are all face-eating cats furries, and all furries face-eating cats?
Re: Memo to Ron WeasleydamnfinecupofOctober 7 2007, 06:38:57 UTC
Poor, poor Ron Weasley. Cooper was almost sorry to disillusion him. He almost wished he could let Ron continue in blissful ignorance, unaware that some cats ate faces.
His duty bade otherwise.
He replied urgently.
To: Ron Weasley From: Coop RE: RE: RE: 'Furries'
Yes, those face-eating cats. They came to Hogwarts in waves and droves. Now they're lying low. Who knows what scheme they're hatching in the shadows?
I can't tell you whether all 'furries' are face-eating cats. You'll have to tell me more about 'furries' for me to say. I can, however, assure you that all face-eating cats are furry, beyond the shadow of a doubt.
Re: Memo to Ron WeasleydungbombsruleOctober 7 2007, 16:38:00 UTC
To: Coop From: Ron Weasley RE: RE: RE: RE: 'Furries'
Hey Mister Cooper,
Yeah, but that adjective implies a verb, doesn't it? Face-eating, I mean. That means they ate faces. How many and whose is what I want to know. It could be a clue. Maybe that's how furries are made?
Furries are... well, that's the thing. I don't know what they are. I do know that they're coming to Hogwarts and, I think, planning something nefarious. Also, one invaded a Q-Brick. It was gross and awful.
Investigate? Aw, I don't have to wear a stupid hat, do I?
Comments 10
FROM: Special Agent Dale Cooper
RE: 'Furries'
Werewolves? They're a thing of the past. Technically speaking they're also a thing of the present, but they no longer threaten Hogwarts per se. No, the real peril facing us is the threat of face-eating cats.
Face-eating cats are furry.
Are these furries, by any chance, cats or catlike?
Reply
To: Special Agent Dale Cooper
From: Ron Weasley
Re: Re: 'Furries'
Dear Special Agent Dale Cooper,
I'm not sure werewolves were threatening Hogwarts before, but ok. Wait, you mean those face-eating- I mean, those cats that just started appearing, like, over a year ago or something like that? Those things always rubbed me the wrong way. Don't tell me they did something!
Are all face-eating cats furries, and all furries face-eating cats?
I don't know, and that's why I was writing you!
From,
Ron Weasley
Reply
His duty bade otherwise.
He replied urgently.
To: Ron Weasley
From: Coop
RE: RE: RE: 'Furries'
Yes, those face-eating cats. They came to Hogwarts in waves and droves. Now they're lying low. Who knows what scheme they're hatching in the shadows?
I can't tell you whether all 'furries' are face-eating cats. You'll have to tell me more about 'furries' for me to say. I can, however, assure you that all face-eating cats are furry, beyond the shadow of a doubt.
We should investigate a possible link.
Reply
From: Ron Weasley
RE: RE: RE: RE: 'Furries'
Hey Mister Cooper,
Yeah, but that adjective implies a verb, doesn't it? Face-eating, I mean. That means they ate faces. How many and whose is what I want to know. It could be a clue. Maybe that's how furries are made?
Furries are... well, that's the thing. I don't know what they are. I do know that they're coming to Hogwarts and, I think, planning something nefarious. Also, one invaded a Q-Brick. It was gross and awful.
Investigate? Aw, I don't have to wear a stupid hat, do I?
From,
Ron Weasley
Reply
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