Jadzia Dax, Star Trek: DS9
((ooc: If anyone’s interested, I’m playing Jadzia during early season 4, just after the events of Rejoined.))
Lt. Commander Jadzia Dax walked into the great hall, tricorder at the ready. Not moments ago, Jadzia had been working contently in one of Quark’s holo-suites, running a simulation meant to examine some recent energy fluctuations in the wormhole.
“Hello? Quark, you promised me this room for an hour. You can’t go switching programs ten minutes in.”
No reply. And for some reason, her tricorder was dead. Lovely.
Jadzia pressed her combadge. “Dax to O’Brien.” Once again, nothing.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Cheese? Quark was really scraping the bottom of barrel, as far as simulation programs went. "Well, as a rule of thumb, I say the smellier, the better. Melted Fontina is quite good over gagh."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"Carrottop? The 21st century prop comic turned cult leader? Strictly speaking, murder is behavior unbefitting of a Starfleet officer. But I’ve seen recordings of his act, in history seminars at the academy. It was so...very...wrong...” Jadzia cleared her throat. “Like I said, murder, however justified, is behavior unbefitting of an officer."
3. What time is it where you are?
"I have no idea! My tricorder isn’t working." Jadzia waved the useless thing around, and sighed. "That’s the third this month. Miles is not going to be happy."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
"Sexual harassment is behavior unbefitting of- Oh, screw it. Whichever one is least likely to talk about work in the bedroom, and vice versa. There’s nothing less attractive than someone who can’t leave the pillow talk at home."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Is that what this was about? Quark was jealous of her bartending skills?
"Relax, Quark. Just because I can make flaming Chech'tluth with my eyes closed doesn’t mean I want a career pouring drinks. I’ve got no intentions of opening a rival bar. Although, if I did, we both know that you’d be out of business in a heartbeat."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
"I’m afraid I don’t understand the predicament. Why can’t he just marry them both?" What century did this simulation take place in?
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"You’re still on a paper-based correspondence system? What kind of sense does that make? Data logs are more efficient, and a lot easier on the maintenance crew."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
"Useless?" Jadzia laughed. "Now you’re just trying to upset me! All right. I graduated from Starfleet academy with degrees in astrophysics, exoarchaeology, exobiology, and zoology. I practice Klingon calisthenics and mok'bara. Over eight lifetimes, I have built ships, saved lives, discovered new species, composed symphonies, and repaired timelines. I have given life-" Jadzia hesitated "-and I have taken life. I have been a wife, and a husband. A mother, and a father. Above everything else, I am Dax, and embrace all that name implies."
Jadzia smiled. "That was cathartic! I may talk too much, but I like to think I’m useful nonetheless."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Bribery? Typical Ferengi. But what in the Federation did ‘squib’ mean? It didn’t sound pleasant. "All right. If you don’t ‘Sqiub’ me, I’ll see if I can’t get Odo to look the other way during next month’s inventory shipments, provided you let me inspect your stock to insure there’s nothing too dangerous onboard. Consider it an early birthday present."
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ____JD____
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ____JD_____.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ___JD____.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Until peanut butter launches a resistance ____JD_____"
Lt. Commander Jadzia Dax walked into the great hall, tricorder at the ready. Not moments ago, Jadzia had been working contently in one of Quark’s holo-suites, running a simulation meant to examine some recent energy fluctuations in the wormhole.
“Hello? Quark, you promised me this room for an hour. You can’t go switching programs ten minutes in.”
No reply. And for some reason, her tricorder was dead. Lovely.
Jadzia pressed her combadge. “Dax to O’Brien.” Once again, nothing.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Cheese? Quark was really scraping the bottom of barrel, as far as simulation programs went. "Well, as a rule of thumb, I say the smellier, the better. Melted Fontina is quite good over gagh."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"Carrottop? The 21st century prop comic turned cult leader? Strictly speaking, murder is behavior unbefitting of a Starfleet officer. But I’ve seen recordings of his act, in history seminars at the academy. It was so...very...wrong...” Jadzia cleared her throat. “Like I said, murder, however justified, is behavior unbefitting of an officer."
3. What time is it where you are?
"I have no idea! My tricorder isn’t working." Jadzia waved the useless thing around, and sighed. "That’s the third this month. Miles is not going to be happy."
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
"Sexual harassment is behavior unbefitting of- Oh, screw it. Whichever one is least likely to talk about work in the bedroom, and vice versa. There’s nothing less attractive than someone who can’t leave the pillow talk at home."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Is that what this was about? Quark was jealous of her bartending skills?
"Relax, Quark. Just because I can make flaming Chech'tluth with my eyes closed doesn’t mean I want a career pouring drinks. I’ve got no intentions of opening a rival bar. Although, if I did, we both know that you’d be out of business in a heartbeat."
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
"I’m afraid I don’t understand the predicament. Why can’t he just marry them both?" What century did this simulation take place in?
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"You’re still on a paper-based correspondence system? What kind of sense does that make? Data logs are more efficient, and a lot easier on the maintenance crew."
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
"Useless?" Jadzia laughed. "Now you’re just trying to upset me! All right. I graduated from Starfleet academy with degrees in astrophysics, exoarchaeology, exobiology, and zoology. I practice Klingon calisthenics and mok'bara. Over eight lifetimes, I have built ships, saved lives, discovered new species, composed symphonies, and repaired timelines. I have given life-" Jadzia hesitated "-and I have taken life. I have been a wife, and a husband. A mother, and a father. Above everything else, I am Dax, and embrace all that name implies."
Jadzia smiled. "That was cathartic! I may talk too much, but I like to think I’m useful nonetheless."
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Bribery? Typical Ferengi. But what in the Federation did ‘squib’ mean? It didn’t sound pleasant. "All right. If you don’t ‘Sqiub’ me, I’ll see if I can’t get Odo to look the other way during next month’s inventory shipments, provided you let me inspect your stock to insure there’s nothing too dangerous onboard. Consider it an early birthday present."
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ____JD____
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ____JD_____.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ___JD____.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Until peanut butter launches a resistance ____JD_____"