Prompt Post 2 (Closed to new prompts)
Prompt post 2
Welcome to the Hobbit Kink Meme! Here you can post prompts for anything related to the Hobbit!
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Welcome to the Hobbit Kink Meme! Here you can post prompts for anything related to the Hobbit!
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Over the next few weeks, Kíli spent so many evenings at Bag End that he had practically moved in and waking up curled in his boyfriend's arms never failed to put a smile on Bilbo's face. Indeed he had not been this happy since before his parents died and even talking to Gandalf couldn't annoy him as it once did.
The florist should have known that such joy could never pass unchallenged.
It was his relatives of course, a thorn in his side like always, for the Sackville-Bagginses had never been willing to let him be. Where the other members of his family simply pretended that they'd never known him, Lobelia always had to interfere and so Bilbo should have expected her meddling. However, she hadn't called in ages and his recent good luck had driven his cousin from his mind.
Which made it even more of a shock when Lobelia strolled into his shop one morning just after it had opened, looking around her as though she owned the place.
“What are you doing here?” Bilbo asked, trying and failing to keep his annoyance from his voice.
“I have news, dear cousin. Difficult news and I thought that you should hear it from me instead of my lawyer.” She replied, her expression a false facade of caring that made the florist cringe. If Lobelia's mentioning her lawyer, then this can't be good. The last time I saw him, she was trying to have my parents' will thrown out.
“News about what exactly? I'm still not giving you my house,” Bilbo said warily, not liking the avaricious gleam within her eyes.
“Oh no of course not, darling.” His cousin said, placing one hand on her heart dramatically. “It's actually about this quaint little shop of yours. You see, we all thought that your parents owned the building outright, but we were searching through some of our old records and that just isn't the case.”
“Bullshit,” Bilbo burst out. “I inherited the deed when my parents died and their names were the only ones on it.”
“The only ones on the deed, yes, but there's the matter of this little contract to be dealt with.” Lobelia told him as she pulled a folder from her purse. “It seems my dear husband Otho helped them make this purchase and the whole matter just slipped his mind. You know how his memory is these days. So your parents may have been on the deed, but there's a standing debt that's owed.”
“Cosigned as equal partners... either owner may sell at any time... must be bought out at full market price by the other or property to be sold...” The florist mumbled, reading over the paperwork. With every line, the knot in his stomach grew tighter and by the time he finished, Bilbo felt like he would be sick. “There must be some mistake. If this were true you should have been listed on the deed, or at least mentioned it when their estate was settled. I don't... I mean... I could maybe do installments, but there's no way that I can pay you that kind of lump sum now.”
“We know, cousin. That's why I'm here.” Lobelia murmured, reaching out to pat his hand. “Obviously we don't want to take your business away from you, but a contract is a contract and debts must be paid. You have until the end of the month to come up with the money or I'm afraid that we'll either have to put this place on the market or start seizing your assets, starting with that lovely house of yours.”
His cousin swept out just as regally as she had entered, leaving the florist with this ultimatum and a sick feeling in his gut. There was no way Bilbo could pay his cousins off that quickly without selling Bag End, not with how real estate had shot up in recent years, and the thought broke his heart.
So when Kíli stopped by before his shift an hour later, he found the florist sitting at the counter with his head in his hands. Bilbo looked up at his entrance to give him a bleak smile and while the barista had been running late, all other concerns disappeared at the pain in his boyfriend's eyes.
“Bilbo, what's wrong?” The younger man asked, rushing to the other's side and beneath his gentle questioning, the whole story came pouring out: Lobelia's visit and her demands and the contract that started it all.
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“Are you sure it is real?” Kíli asked, eyeing the documents suspiciously. “I'm no expert but this whole thing does seem really strange. Tell you what, let me make a call and get someone down here to check it out.”
“A call?” His boyfriend asked in confusion, “You know someone who deals with things like this?”
“Love, haven't you noticed?” The young man replied with a smile, “My family deals in everything. But uncle Thorin was a real estate lawyer so this might as well be our specialty.”
“So are you going to ask him?” Bilbo said, feeling his hopes begin to rise for the first time since Lobelia had dropped her bomb.
“Nah. If this contract is real then we'll go to him, because retired or not he should be able to represent you or at least find someone else who can. But we might not even have to ask depending on what Nori says. He's good with these sort of things.” Kíli explained before pulling out his phone.
While his boyfriend made the call, Bilbo digested this new revelation, wondering what other surprises the barista's relatives had in store. Admittedly his new driver had always seemed a little shifty, if a perfectly nice guy, but this kind of specialized knowledge had never crossed his mind. However, while that Kíli's reaction was certainly unexpected, it was nice to know that his boyfriend had his back, for the florist hadn't had any allies other than Gandalf in a very long time.
Nori arrived within the hour and he listened carefully as his cousin told him what was going on. Then he held his hand out for the folder, taking it over to the window to examine the documents while Kíli went next door to explain why he was late.
On his return, the young man brought Bilbo his usual order and the tea helped to calm the florist's twitchy nerves. So he nibbled on his muffin, the barista pressed against his side for support, until Nori finally looked up with a grin.
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“Oh thank the lord,” Bilbo said, sinking down into his chair as his knees gave out with relief. “I owe you Nori, really. A bonus at least.”
“Don't worry about it.” His deliveryman told him, shaking his head. “You're family now and that's all there is to it. Besides it's not all good news - even though this isn't real you can't do anything against your cousins unless you can prove beyond a doubt that they knew it was a fake.”
“Trust me, this is plenty.” The florist replied, still somewhat flabbergasted by the show of support. Is this what families are supposed to be like? My relatives spend more time stabbing each other in the back for social standing than they do actually helping each other. “It would be nice if I could make Lobelia back off forever, but I've been dealing with her for nearly all my life, so I think I can manage a few more years. If nothing else, threatening to reveal her duplicity to the rest of the family should make her wary of messing with me again.”
So Bilbo thanked Nori once more and allowed him to go back to whatever he was doing, convincing Kíli to go off to work as well. Then he called his cousin, using his store phone because there's no way she was getting his cell number, and told her the great news.
For once in her life, Lobelia backed down without a fight and that more than anything told the florist that she had known the truth all along. Though of course, his cousin pretended to be shocked at the revelation, promising to hunt down that poor notary and make him pay. Bilbo rather hoped that she didn't bother since he wouldn't wish her vengeance on even his worst enemies, although if the notary had known what he was doing, perhaps it served him right.
The florist actually hung up in the middle of Lobelia's tirade because once he was assured of his cousin's compliance, he didn't really want to listen to her anymore. After all, he had much more pleasant things to be thinking about, like that gorgeous boyfriend of his who would be on his break soon.
So Bilbo put this encounter from his mind and turned to help the frantic customer who had just walked in the door.
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“Bilbo, my dear boy,” His uncle bellowed heartily, blatantly ignoring the fact that the two of them hadn't spoken since the funeral and didn't even like each other enough to send out generic Yuletide cards. “You will be coming to the family reunion next Saturday, won't you? The whole clan will be there and I know that they would love to see your face.”
“Um, what?” Was all the florist managed to stutter out. This invitation was literally the last thing he expected and Bilbo would have been less surprised to hear that Otho and Lobelia were becoming humanitarians.
“The family reunion, son. It would be so nice if you could come this time,” Longo said, his attempt at sincerity sounding rather more like condescension.
“This time? You've had one before? I wasn't aware that I was ever invited to an event like that and I don't see why I should intrude where I'm not wanted.” Bilbo replied, putting a hint of bite in his words. This was the first time he had heard about any reunion and the florist knew well what his family thought of him.
“Oh come on now, you can hardly hold the past against us. It's not as though you had made the best life choices and we couldn't have such a bad example around the children when they were young.” His uncle explained, apparently not seeing anything wrong with calling the other's entire life a waste.
This is really not how to make me change my mind, Bilbo thought, rolling his eyes in exasperation, but he couldn't get a word in edgewise while Longo rambled on. “... and you know that my brother was running for sheriff so being seen with one of your kind would have ruined his chances. But I hear that you've begun to turn yourself around so we'd love to see you there.”
“Fine, I'll check my schedule and let you know.” Bilbo promised, fully intending to make up some prior engagement if none arrived.
However, when he mentioned the strange phone call to Kíli that evening, his boyfriend refused to accept his choice without an explanation. Although considering that the florist had actively avoided mentioning most of his relatives during the entire time that they had known each other, the younger man's question was rather justified.
“Wait, you actually have enough relatives to have a reunion?” He asked, turning to look at Bilbo in confusion. “I thought that you just had that one awful cousin. Why haven't you talked about any of them before?”
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“I haven't mentioned them because they're bastards and they hate me and I never wanted you to have to deal with that.” Bilbo said, the words stumbling over one another in a rushing tide. “They're the worst kind of high society vultures: completely obsessed with their image and they would sell each other in a heartbeat for a bit more power in their hands. My father was practically disowned by his siblings when he 'married beneath his station' and my preferences certainly didn't help to change their minds. I haven't seen anyone but Otho and Lobelia since the funeral because no one else would talk to me and those two just want to get my house.”
“So it wasn't that you didn't want them to meet me?” Kíli whispered, the hurt finally beginning to disappear.
“No, never. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I'd be proud to show you off.” The florist promised as he wrapped the younger man in a tight hug. “If anything I didn't want you to meet them. They'd tear you apart for dating me and I guess I was worried that you might start to see their side.”
“Sometimes you're an idiot, Bilbo.” His boyfriend responded, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “So it's a good thing that I like you as much as I do. You can't pick your relatives and I'm hardly going to let some bigoted assholes scare me off. Will you trust me on that?”
“I do,” The florist protested, before admitting with a frustrated sigh. “I just have trouble believing this is real sometimes. I mean you're just so... why would you stick with me?”
“You know what? We should go to this reunion of yours.” Kíli declared in what seemed to be a complete non sequitur. But he was entirely serious and as the older man stared at him in bafflement, he went on to explain. “That way you could see if all of your relatives are as bad as you remember and maybe you'd finally believe me when I say that I'd walk through hell for you.”
While part of Bilbo was pleased at the younger man's offer, none of his past asshole boyfriends would have ever considered that, the rest of his mind knew: this is a terrible idea. So when he finally managed to stop gaping long enough to find his voice, that is what came out.
“Seriously, this is a terrible idea. I can't even... “ The florist trailed off, shaking his head. “They'd probably throw us out the instant we walked through the door and you shouldn't... You don't have anything to prove to me. I know I'm just being stupid and I don't need you to suffer through my relatives just to reopen old wounds. Because you can't fix everything, you know, and sometimes you shouldn't try.”
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“Because your family is actually made up of decent human beings!” His boyfriend shouted in exasperation as he finally lost his temper. “But you know what, fine! If you want to have a miserable evening that badly, I'll call Longo back and tell him we'll be there at five with the rest. So when the bastards spend the entire night making snide comments behind our backs, at least I'll get to say I told you so.”
“Fine! I'll see you then.” The younger man growled in agreement before gathering his stuff and stalking out the door. He paused only to shout, “I just want to fucking make you happy, asshole,” before the florist heard his bike roar off.
Bilbo sank back onto the couch with a growl of his own, kicking at a cushion in frustration. Stupid bloody-minded bastard. Why can't he just accept that some things suck and leave it at that? But no, he always has to be the fucking hero so now we're going to walk blindly into the viper's den and they're going to try to rip him to pieces. And he's either going to kill someone and end up in prison for the rest of his life or he's finally going to realize what a mess I am and dump my sorry ass.
That had been their first real fight and the florist's anger was quickly turning to misery as he replayed it in his mind. Even if Kíli was being stupid, and he was, Bilbo knew that he had severely overreacted as well.
So now he was committed to attending the damn thing, terrible idea or not, and he picked up the phone to call Longo before he lost his nerve. There was no way the older man was going to back down, not after the speech he had given, and he certainly wouldn't be the first to apologize. Though it was rather lonely to go to bed alone, trying to ignore the way that Kíli's toothbrush stared at him accusingly. Even Bilbo's mattress seemed too large now for all that he had slept in it for years and it was a long time before he managed to fall asleep.
Things didn't seem much better in the morning, if anything the florist just felt worse, and dragging himself into work that day was nearly impossible. Truthfully, he might as well have stayed in bed since no one wanted to buy flowers from someone who looked like his heart was breaking and and every time Bilbo checked his phone to see no messages, his heart sank a little more.
At least Kíli wasn't at the cafe that morning because seeing him would have sorely tested the older man's resolve. But for all that he didn't want to imagine losing his boyfriend, if I can even call him that anymore, the florist refused to beg and they would resolve this as equals or not at all.
But the younger man didn't call him and so he spent several hours wallowing in his loneliness before he finally gave up and went home. At least there he could indulge his misery with ice cream and maybe tomorrow would be a brighter day. However, waking up alone sucked just as much the second time so when his phone finally buzzed, Bilbo shoved the bouquet he was holding into the window and rushed over to see what it said.
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Which was a revelation that the florist would revisit later on. For now, he simply typed: 'I'd like that. I still think I'm right too, but I may have overreacted a bit. My family has always been a touchy subject.'
'Will you tell me why?' was the near instantaneous response and Bilbo flushed with pleasure at the knowledge that Kíli must have been waiting anxiously as well.
'I'll try. There's so much history that it's hard to know where to start. They're just horrible, they've always been horrible and I can't see that changing anytime soon. You know Lobelia tried to get me to sign over my parents' house at their funeral? She couldn't even wait a fucking day and Otho was plastered as usual, not that I can blame him too much considering his wife.
But they're all like that. Too caught up in social status and appearances to be decent human beings. When I was a kid my aunts and uncles would drop by our house just to berate my father for his choices and they were always trying to convince him to leave my mother for some high class trophy wife.
They don't even care that I prefer men, not really. I could sleep with as many men as I wanted and my relatives wouldn't bat an eye as long as I had an official wife to bring to social functions. Lord knows uncle Polo has never been particularly faithful but he's discreet and no one cares as long as there's no scandal. So really they're shallow greedy bigots who bend over backwards to accommodate public opinion and I don't understand why you would want to meet them at all.'
It was strangely cathartic to write out this explanation, almost as though the resentment had festered and speaking of it lanced the wound. The distance of texting helped as well, giving Bilbo time to gather his words without pressure, and he felt lighter once this message was sent.
'All right, so they do sound pretty bad.' Kíli admitted after a long delay. However, the florist should have known that the barista wouldn't give up so fast. 'And I know you won't want to hear this, but can you be sure that they're all like that? You said yourself that you haven't seen your relatives in years, so some of them might have changed.'
These words made Bilbo want to lash out again, scream at the younger man to let the damn thing go. But that was what had gotten them into this mess in the first place, so this time he forced himself to stop and think about the other's words instead.
'Honestly, I don't know. Some of my second cousins were all right when we were children and Aunt Rosa married a Took so her kids were always a little different than the rest. But most of them are around your age now or a bit younger and I seriously doubt that they're any better than their parents were back in the day.'
'Don't you want to be sure before you give up on them completely?' Kíli wrote back and it seemed entirely unfair that he could sound so earnest in a text. 'I mean, my family drives me crazy sometimes but I know they'll always be there for me and if even one of your relatives might give you the same support, wouldn't it be worth finding out?'
'I'm not the one giving up on them! They abandoned me after my parents died and I know when I'm not wanted. Why should I risk feeling that pain again?' The florist typed back hotly, an echo of old grief flaring in his chest.
'Longo did call you, maybe he finally wants to try. And if your cousins were just children when everything happened, they probably thought that you didn't like them anymore. Who knows what their parents told them after all? Just go this once and see what happens, please? I'll be there with you and if everything goes horribly wrong at least you'll still have tried.'
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'So does this mean that I'm forgiven? Can I come in?' This text was accompanied by a quiet knock and the florist looked up to see his boyfriend waving hesitantly through the window of his shop.
At the sight, Bilbo couldn't help but smile and he gestured the other man inside. “Come here you silly bastard,” He said, wrapping the younger man in a hug and after a moment, Kíli relaxed within his arms.
“I really am sorry you know,” The barista murmured against his neck as he held on tight. “I don't like fighting with you at all.”
“Me neither,” The older man replied, determined to make things right again. “And I'm sorry I got so angry. I know you were trying to help and I probably did need to hear it - I just didn't want to. Maybe next time we have a disagreement we can try it without the yelling and storming off because I'm rather used to having you around.”
“Deal,” His boyfriend agreed, leaning in to seal it with a kiss. Somehow that turned into making out against the counter and while the florist was enjoying himself too much to stop, he did spare a thought to hope that no one was getting a show as they walked by.
However, eventually Bilbo's conscience got the better of him and the older man drew back with a reluctant sigh, knowing that he shouldn't let Kíli distract him like this. “As much as I would love to continue what we're doing, it should probably wait for later. I am supposed to be working and I really can't leave the shop unattended right now.”
“There's always the storage room,” His boyfriend told him with a cheeky grin, a wicked light shining in his eyes.
“You know, I do believe you're right,” The florist responded, unable to resist the temptation of that heated gaze. So he flipped his sign to closed and locked the door behind him before pulling Kíli toward the back. He had a boyfriend to ravish and if anyone needed flowers, they could wait 'til he was done.
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