how to deal with loss....there is no right answer
sorry its been a while ive been busy with Christmas stuff with family and learning to get through a major holiday without my child... and as the first big holiday since ( outside of thanksgiving but that is a weird holiday for me as it is). id like to say I was strong and I stood my ground and I didn't break but I cant I managed to make it through presents without tears shed for my child but the second I came home to my house I realized that I have no child and I have no life growing in my belly. I should be 14 weeks today and it hasn't gotten any easier I haven't returned to a normal life and now im listed as depressed and am attending a support group once a month to try and heal myself. yesterday my boyfriend made a point that im not to sure on he said because I have a plaque for our child and pregnancy test and hospital band (all I have of our child) and am wanting to get a tattoo for them as well that I am making it more difficult for myself to move on and heal. and I have to say im not sure I agree with it. I understand for some it helps to hide the pain and to not display a loss in your home but to some that is their coping method that works best for them. if I take my things down and put them away then in my head I am hiding my child and their memory away to be forgotten and left to collect dust in the back of my mind. by having those items close to my bed and a tattoo close to my heart I am freeing not only myself and my emotions I am freeing my child In a way I am telling them they are with me every minute of everyday and one day I will see them again and until then I carry them with me always. its my way to slowly move on. I will never forget and I will never be ashamed of my child I will not hide my child in a drawer and I will not hide my pain. I will be strong for those who cant handle my pain but in the presence of my friends and family that understand I will let them in and let them heal me as I heal myself. what are yalls thoughts on preserving the life of a child lost? no answer is the wrong one everyone copes and heals differently. we all stand as 1. we are 1 in 4 no matter how we deal with it. we are parents no matter what people say. and we will not forget.