I am in New York State of Mind
Some folks like to get away,
Take a holiday from the neighborhood
Hop a flight to Miami Beach or to Hollywood
But I'm takin' a Greyhound on the Hudson River line
I'm in a New York state of mind
- Billy Joel
November 7th, Election day. And I just came back from New York yesterday. I was in a very mixed mood today. It's hard to describe it... basically, I didn't feel like putting on my nice suburban American face on.
I was still in the Wild-Russian-from-New-York state of Mind.
Yesterday my husband suggested we bring our car for inspection today, then drive together, vote and then I drop him off at his job. Everything is handy dandy? Except that he forgot it was a parent-teacher conference day.
Yes, I briefly remembered it yesterday night, but not enough to actually go ahead, print my schedule and get everything ready for the next day. Hey, I was still in a New York State of Mind.
This morning I was busy with everything except for thinking about my P/T conferences. Yes, I had to write a good-bye letters to one of the two teachers in the Middle school that really made an impression on me. I already delivered it orally to one of them, the Reading teacher. Now I had to write it to the Geography teacher. That, plus that Memory mood that I usually sink in after I come back from NY.....
It's 7:27 AM when I finally realize what day it is and what state am I in. And, most importantly, who am I?
I am a mom of a high schooler
in Downington district, PA
who has scheduled to have a few P/T conferences to talk about her son from 8 to 8:30 AM.
I kind of realized it was a futile attempt to catch up when it was already 8 AM. But why not try. After all, there is only 1 teacher that I was really interested to talk to, his English lessons teacher. I take my keys and leave.
Five minutes later I stand in the lobby of the school, ready to ask a secretary if there is anyone who can tell me my schedule. “No”, I am told, you need to go to the Guidance counselor’s office. At the Guidance they tell me to go to the Main office and ask the Principal Secretary. I don't feel like making a fool out of myself. "Hi, I'm an absent-minded mom who is late for her conferences and don't have the schedule...."
I leave.
It's ok, Anna! It's a make-up time for all those years of being an Exemplary Student who was always-on-time-and-never-absent.
I go home and wake up my husband. We drive one car to the car place for inspection and drive together to our local Middle school to vote. As we walk from the parking lot to a poster filled entrance to the polling place I feel my mind is relaxing.... a little more than usual.... almost in a meditative state. Well, it's been happening since last Wednesday. I guess it's my way of letting go... accepting the situation... moving on with life...
We go in, take our ballots, sign our names and go to the tables. We stand next to each other. I ask my husband what are we checking today.
- Just check in 'All Democratic'
- Is that all?? We are not gonna check individual names? Why not?
…
The man who is in charge of the ballots come up to us (my face is almost buried in my husband's stall) and tell us, as if we are two school students copying from each other: "This is individual ballots, you see, you can't talk to each other!"
I detect a twinkle in his eyes. He also feels like he is upbraiding little kids. I feel my 40 years are rapidly melting away from me.
"but... but... I don't really believe in all that election stuff anyway! I come here because of him!" I point to the object of my involuntary Election.
He laughs. "Good for him!"
I guess he detects a replying twinkle in my eyes.
“Well, in America, voting is supposed to be private.“
We leave the booths and I decide to explain myself a little bit.
“You know, ever since I learned that they are gonna put that pipe in our neighborhood, right in our backyard no matter how many people protested it, I don't believe in all this election crap any more. “
“Let me tell you a secret …. “ he starts, however, I interrupt, I'm too excited.
He finally manages to deliver his secret. If I go to the Township building I'll find that there is a map with some 39 pipes in our neighborhood.
- How is that supposed to help me?
- Do you know when was the last time the pipe blew up?
- No
- 1939 and it didn't even kill any one.
That's not what I remember my husband told me. However, I'm through with arguments. We put our ballots in the machine, first tearing away a stub with our names, because “In United States it's always anonymous”.
It is the same guy who volunteered here 10 years ago when we just moved to Pennsylvania. I wonder if he remembers me in those first years when I just started coming to vote. I was so ignorant about the whole process back then that I was surprised when he told me to tear the stub.
- Why?, my usual curiosity took over.
- Because we are in US, and our votes are anonymous.
At that time I felt SOOOO embarrassed for not knowing….
Who knows, he might not have forgotten it. It seems to me I'm detecting a somewhat patronizing tone of voice in the words “Here in America..”
We leave, I drive to my husband's work. On the way there I ask him if that's true that the last incidence of pipe line exploding was that many years ago.
- No, it's not true, he tells me, if you read newspapers you'll see they have one always every year somewhere in the US.
- Then, why did he say then that the last one was in 1939?”
We talk about American way of Being Polite when you deal with people you don't know. We talk about how it's different from Russian way of dealing with people you don't know. We, Russians, tend to be much less polite with strangers. Another words, in our Russian culture, we feel much closer to the strangers, so we don't need all those Politeness Barriers that Americans build when they first start communicating.
I need to tell that to my American friend who wanted to know the difference between the 2 cultures.
Nov 7, 2017
