fucking mothers -.-
ok i am so done with this melodramatic bullshit my moms pissing me off she got my report card i failed all but one class and she went rip shit but what she fucking fails to realize is that i was SUICIDAL for most of the school year untill about last month i tried hard and did ok untill 2nd quarter then i failed ALL of my classes but cuz of finals i passed 3 out of 6 now i failed all but one class cuz i didnt have the energy thats what it's like when your suicidal nothing in the world matters to you anymore your so mentally and phisically drained you dont see a way out of the pain i saw a way out and planned it throughly but then my cousin killed himself and i saw first hand what it did to my family and KNEW i couldnt do that to the people i did still care about so i was stuck i was in so much pain and couldnt do anything about it i was drowning in my own depression and i had no one who cared i i said anything people would shrug me off or make a omg get over it face or just plain get pissed off -.- but thank you oh so fucking much assholes for givign a shit about me i told my mom to her face i was suicidal and wanted to killmyself and she shrugged me off she has no right getting pissed off at me for my grades when she doesnt know trhe facts i fucking planned out my death for crying out loud !?!?! she goes " CHRISTINA LYNN ADAMS you failed all but one class your gronded NO MORE WRESTLING and i am taking the comp out of your room" first off bitch it's MY COMP that I payed for she told me " you have to earn that computer" I FUCKING PAYED FOR IT WITH MY OWN FUCKING MONEY THAT I EARNED AT WORK DUMB ASS and as for wrestling i'll go weither she likes it or not i dotn go anywhere exept every other week one time every other week i go out with friends my sisters are always out with their friends so bite me bitch hanging out with my boys and my girls at wrestling has made me happy something i havent felt in a very long time i forgetmt problems and have fun with them that and online is how i get to talk with people otherwise i sit at home no communication and think about my problems all day long wich puts me back into a suicidal stage so yes mom take the 2 things i have the ONLY 2 things that make me happy not take them away from me and see how well that goes i'm a "good kid" i dont smoke do drugs drink or have sex of any kind well we all know thats by my choice i can fucking change it all if she is going to start this shit with me ok around 3 nicole picks me up to go to the library to do our project and we did we got ALOT of info faster than we thought so we went to her house after i had fun with george ashley nicole and the 2 chris's we had a blast then i get a ride home from chris i wak in the door and my mom goes off on me she's like " YOU WERENT AT THE FUCKING LIBRARY AT ALL IT ISNT OPEN THIS LATE YOUR IN SO MUCH SHIT CUZ U LIED TO ME" i was like "MOM CALM THE FUCK DOWN I DID GO TO THE LIBRARY AND WE WENT TO NICOLES AFTER SO BREATH " SHE GOES " YOU WERENT SUPPOSED TO " i rolled my eyes at her and kept talking to chris i was holding a moutain dew can she she goes " WERE YOU DRINKING?!?!" WTF it's me i dont drink !!! i was like " it's a fucking moutain dew mom chill the fuck out" she is pissing me off i was scream things at her but iwould feel bad telling her she didnt give a shit that i wanted to killmyself the things i would say would hurt her and i would feel bad -.- damn me being nice she pisses me off so badly right now -.- oh the other day friday i mean when she found out i went to go for a walk so i could talk to kittie and she goes " makeing plans to move out yet?" WTF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN ?!?!?! i swear to fucking god idk if i can take another year with her my sisters are her pride and joy and i am the leftovers even though i came first w/e i cant write more tv is on and i am tired now i'll update later gomen i haent been updating i'll try harder