Title: These Gays Have Lost Their Goddamn Fucking Minds
Pairing:
Kevin Jonas/
Zac EfronSummary: After
Bible camp, Kevin and Zac end up at the same high school.
Notes: 3800 words long!! Bridgie was like, WRITE MORE KEVRON, and I was like, YOU MEAN I SHOULD WRITE A STORY WHERE THEY PART WAYS AFTER CAMP BUT THEN KEVIN TRANSFERS TO ZAC'S SCHOOL, TOTAL GREASE STYLE??? And Bridgie was like, YEAH. If there is one thing I like better than making Bridgie's dreams come true, they have not invented it yet. Thank you to
fledmusic for helping me!
Kevin is feeling a little nervous, but he's mostly excited. It's a swirly combination of nervous and excited, maybe like a nerxcited feeling. It's the first day of the new school year. He's going to public high school for the very first, and very last time, as this will be his senior year. After camp this summer, he realized he was missing out on meeting so many people and having so many experiences by being homeschooled. His brothers are basically his only friends, and maybe the people at camp, too, but he doesn't see them very often, or sometimes he'll have a shared, somewhat gay experience with one of them and then he'll never get a letter or a phone call or anything from them ever again.
Zac was such a weirdo. Kevin misses his presence.
~*~
Both Kevin's mom and dad insisted on driving him to the school, and then Joe wanted to come, so Nick wanted to come, so they had to bring Frankie along, too. Kevin has to beg them to just drop him off and not walk him inside. He's watched TV; he knows how this could go. He could definitely end up duct taped to something by the end of the day. He's just going to go in and act natural, maybe like it's camp, only he's going to be learning, and hope that that's good enough to get by.
Kevin's mom still gets out of the car to hug him and pet his hair before he can go inside. He feels kind of how like a show dog must feel, only with more shame. Joe hangs out the back window and pets him too, to be a jerk.
"You should've straightened it," Joe says, bouncing his hand up and down on Kevin's curls like they're super springy springs.
Kevin punches Joe in the shoulder and says, "Can I go now?"
"Okay," Kevin's mom says. "Have a good day. Tell the principal if anyone hassles you, and she'll be able to help you. She's your princi-pal!"
Yeah right, Kevin thinks. He shoulders his messenger bag and walks up the stairs into the door.
~*~
"Kevin," Mrs. Cock says, "follow me."
The principal's name is Mrs. Cock. At first Kevin thought he misheard, and he calls her Mrs. Cot a few times before she corrects him. Kevin cannot believe how unfortunate a name that is for a high school principal. Mrs. Cock picks someone in the same homeroom as Kevin to help get him acquainted with the school. She leads him over to a wall of lockers where a group of students are standing around talking and putting stuff in their lockers.
"Mr. Efron," Mrs. Cock says, longsufferingly, like she's had to deal with this kid a lot. Kevin only has time for small a tingle of recognition at the name -- in his brain, in his brain -- before one boy turns around and Kevin slips on an invisible banana peel of feelings and nearly falls backwards because Zac is here. Zac looks like he's slipping on a banana peel of his own, maybe a little like he's seeing the reanimated dead body of someone he's killed, but recovers quickly and makes himself look annoyed. Kevin tries to do the same, because apparently Zac is not as excited about this as he is.
"Yes, Mrs. Cock," Zac says. A few people behind Zac stifle giggles. That is one terrible name.
"Could you be so kind as to show Kevin here around?"
"I don't know, Mrs. Cock, I have kind of a --"
"Thank you, Mr. Efron," Mrs. Cock says, and then she walks away and leaves Kevin standing there in the hallway with Zac two feet away. Kevin feels like he hasn't seen Zac in forever, even though camp ended only a few weeks ago. Kevin still has a bruise on his hip, though it's way faded. He can still see it.
Zac looks like he got a haircut for the fall, because it's not as big and windblown as it was. It's sort of flat except for on the side it flips out a little. He also only has one arm inside the sleeves of his cardigan, with the other dangling loose at his side. Kevin doesn't know why Zac is wearing even half a sweater right now, because it's still hot out.
"Why are you wearing your sweater all funny?" Kevin asks. He reaches back and rubs the back of his neck awkwardly while Zac's friends give him funny looks and scatter away.
Zac stares at Kevin's elbow and says, "I broke my arm." Kevin noticed that Zac was holding his arm awkwardly against his body, but he just thought Zac was just clutching a book or standing with his hand on his hip a lot.
"Oh," Kevin says. "How'd you break your arm?"
Zac shrugs and holds out his hand. Kevin thinks briefly that Zac wants to hold his hand, which is a quick change from how he's been acting, until he realizes Zac wants Kevin to hand over the class schedule he's gripping in his hand. His hand is sweaty and the paper is kind of soggy now, but he hands it over.
Zac looks at the schedule as if he's not really reading it but would just rather be looking at it than Kevin. "I thought you were homeschooled."
"Yeah, I was," Kevin says.
"Are you stalking me or something?"
"What?" Kevin can't tell if Zac is being serious or not, so he decides not to take it seriously and hope for the best. "Maybe you're the one stalking me. Don't you live in California or somewhere?"
Zac sighs through his nose and says, "Just, let's go then. What's your first class?"
"You have my schedule."
"Oh, yeah." He looks at Kevin's schedule again and appears to actually read it this time. "Oh, okay, homeroom."
Homeroom has assigned seating, so Zac and Kevin don't very near each other, but Kevin imagines they wouldn't have sat together anyway.
~*~
Kevin gets through his first classes fine. He tries to sit in the front row of each of them if there's not assigned seating. He likes the front, he likes learning as close as possible, but he also doesn't want to see who's behind him. He doesn't know if Zac is in any of his classes and he doesn't want to know.
He does make a few friends throughout the day. Thank God, because he really didn't want to sit at lunch alone or with people who want to punch him.
"How's your first day going, Kevin?" Nikki asks. Kevin likes Nikki because she's nice and he doesn't feel self conscious eating in front of her, and he imagines she feels the same about him.
Kevin tears his eyes away from the lunch line where Zac is standing with some girl and some guy all over him. Kevin doesn't get it, because Zac didn't have any friends at camp except for Kevin. He's not saying he wants to be Zac's only friend forever, but he wouldn't mind being Zac's friend in addition to his other friends. Zac throws up friendly hang ten signs with his good hand at some people who walk by too, whatever that hand signal means. Kevin's never been surfing before, but he's pretty sure Zac is from the west coast or something.
"Oh, it's going good," Kevin says, forcing himself to sound cheerful, because it's not going that good at all.
"You like Zac, huh?" Nikki says. Kevin snaps his eyes off Zac again and looks at Nikki, who seems to have noticed the staring. "He's pretty nice. He's not mean, anyway."
"Yeah, no, I don't know," Kevin says. Yeah he likes Zac, no he doesn't like Zac, he doesn't know if he likes Zac. "He just showed me around." Kevin is worried that sounds like a double entendre, but Nikki doesn't mention it.
Kevin looks for Zac in the line again, but it's moved way up and he can't find him until he's standing right next to Kevin's table. He doesn't even have a tray of food. Kevin wonders if Zac can eat the cafeteria food here or not because the different foods might touch.
"Hey, how's it going," Zac nods once at Nikki and then looks at Kevin. He breathes on an apple and rubs it against his shirt to clean it. Kevin never really understood the point of doing that. If you're breathing all over it, aren't you making the apple germier than it originally was? And your clothes can't be very clean since you're walking around outside in the pollution and dander of the world and everything.
"Hi," Kevin says. He watches as Zac, still looking at Kevin, puts his mouth against the apple and bites into it. He's eating an apple. Kevin has eaten and seen being eaten millions of apples in his life, it's not really a thing, but seeing Zac eating an apple is like the biggest thing right now.
"Want me to show you around some more?" Zac says with his mouth full. Kevin wonders if he means it as a double entendre or not, but either way he gets up to get showed around.
~*~ Zac leads Kevin down a hallway. They walk next to each other, but Zac is definitely leading, Kevin can feel it. Kevin helped Zac around at camp, where he was out of his element just like Kevin is now, but he's pretty sure he was nicer about it.
They pass Mrs. Cock on the way to wherever they're going. She glares at Zac specifically and doesn't even look at Kevin.
Kevin leans over into Zac's space some and says, "She's a real princi-pal."
Zac looks sideways at him and smiles halfway before shaking it off his head. Kevin feels hope for the first time all day. He gets it if Zac doesn't want everyone to know that he and Kevin have had previous relations and everything, especially since he's the new kid, but he could at least let them become a different sort of friends. School friends instead of camp friends. Regular friends instead of sexy friends.
They end up outside eventually, in the back of the school. They're all alone out there since everyone is eating lunch inside. Kevin tells himself to be cool. What's cool, what's cool?
"Do you have a cigarette?" Kevin asks.
"I don't smoke," Zac shakes his head.
"Neither do I," Kevin says. "I was just seeing if you had one."
Zac halfway smiles again and then says, "Look." Kevin can't believe someone is starting a conversation with him with that and then continuing with, "We can't like, we have to be different here. This isn't camp."
"We can still be friends."
"I sort of have a girlfriend, too," Zac blurts.
"Sort of? Like, she's sort of a friend, or sort of a girl?" Kevin could be Zac's girlfriend if all it takes is to be sort of his friend.
"Both," Zac says and steps closer to Kevin. He reaches up like he's going to put his hand on Kevin's shoulder, but Kevin steps away. Zac moves closer and gets his hand on the back of Kevin's head, fingers spread out and through Kevin's hair. Kevin wants to touch their foreheads together, but he doesn't. Zac's broken arm bumps into Kevin's chest, and his chest hasn't felt so hot inside in weeks.
"I'm glad you didn't straighten this," Zac says, tugging on a strand of Kevin's hair a little and then letting go. He turns to go back inside, but Kevin says, "Me too," and he looks back at Kevin one more time before going.
~*~
When Kevin's entire immediate family picks him up at the end of the day, he says he had a nice day. He wants to tell his mommy he has a booboo and could she please kiss it better, but that might require opening his skull. Kevin doesn't want to shave his head just so his mommy can kiss his booboo.
"How was your day, sweetheart?" His mom asks.
"It was fine," Kevin says. "I don't know if I want to go back."
"Oh, no, why not?"
Kevin doesn't know how to answer that. It's not like he went to this school expressly because Zac was there or anything. He definitely didn't know Zac was there. He doesn't want to let Zac shape his entire public high school experience, but now he probably will.
"It's not that big a deal," Kevin says.
Frankie is next to him in his big kid car seat, which Kevin thinks is super degrading because he's like 5 years old and he shouldn't need a special seat at this point in his life if he's going to grow up to be normal. He holds up his hand for a high five and says, "Keep on truckin', Kevin."
Kevin doesn't know who taught him that phrase, probably Joe, but he high fives his little brother and tells him he'll keep on. Little kids and their motivational high fives always get to Kevin. He can do this.
~*~
One day Kevin goes to watch cheerleading practice. He's only there watching because Nikki is a cheerleader, and he's there to support her. The weather is still summery and he gets hot just sitting in the bleachers, so he rolls the sleeves of his t-shirt up so it looks like he's wearing a sleeveless shirt. He thinks his arms are pretty nice. He could probably be a cheerleader and hold people up, even Nikki.
Kevin gets bored eventually because a lot of cheerleading practice seems to be taken up by Nikki yelling at everyone and sometimes pushing people. Kevin would hold her back, since he's now her friend and he thinks he's supposed to do that, but he doesn't want to get pushed, too. He instead moves up to the back bleachers and looks out across the entire football field.
He spots Zac walking towards the field. He's hard to miss, because he's wearing a cardigan sweater when it's 85 degrees out, and his broken arm sticking out makes him look like a Napoleon Bonaparte or maybe a Mick Jagger type character. Zac appears to spot Kevin too, because he makes his way towards the bleachers and climbs up them. He doesn't walk up the regular steps, but runs up the actual benches like he's a mountain lion. He almost falls over a few times, waving his good arm around for balance, and Kevin understands how he could've broken his arm.
It takes a minute for Zac to reach the top, so Kevin has plenty of time to get away and act like he didn't notice Zac or something, but he stays put. Zac sits downs and leaves enough room to fit another person between them, like if another person couldn't find a place to sit.
"Hey," Zac says.
"Oh, hey," Kevin says. "I didn't see you there."
"How's it going?"
"Pretty good." Kevin looks to his side and sees that there's now only room for half a person to sit between them. "Aren't you hot in that sweater?"
"What do you think?" Zac says. Kevin thinks Zac is hot in that sweater. Zac's cast digs into Kevin's arm. Kevin's face feels hot, but he doesn't know if it's because the sun is directly on top of him or because Zac almost is.
"Really, how'd you break your arm? Did you fall off a mountain?" Kevin says. He closes his legs more so his thigh won't touch Zac's, which keeps moving closer and closer.
"I was sneaking out of my house," Zac says. Kevin sees from the corner of his eye Zac turn his head to look at Kevin. Kevin can't bring himself do the same. "Do you want to come over later? I'm having a party."
Kevin looks down and sees that Zac is anxiously scratching his own knee. A high pitched screech comes from the field below, where apparently Ashley has pushed Nikki after Nikki pushed her. It's about to go down, now. Nikki is rolling up her sleeves and Ashley is taking out her earrings and handing them to Vanessa. Kevin feels like he should be there to hold Nikki's earrings.
"My girlfriend's a cheerleader," Zac says. His nails make incredibly irritating scritch scritch scritch sounds against his jeans.
"My girl friend is a cheerleader, too," Kevin says. He puts his hand over Zac's on his knee to stop the scritching. He means to lift his hand away right after, but Zac exhales through his nose like he's been in pain and is now no longer in pain, so he curls his fingers around so the tips of them touch Zac's palm. Kevin thinks friends hold hands sometimes and earrings sometimes.
"Where's your house?" Kevin asks. He starts to pull his hand away to reach for his backpack and a pen to write it down, but Zac turns his hand over so they're palm to palm and squeezes.
"I'll write it down in a minute," Zac says.
~*~
Kevin's never been to a party before. He's been to church potlucks and backyard barbecues and estate sales where they have lemonade and cookies and family gatherings and an infinite amount of childrens' birthday parties, but never a party-party at somebody's house.
He's a little anxious about going to Zac's. He doesn't know who's going to be there, or when anyone's going to be there. Zac just told him to show up "whenever" which is disorientingly unspecific for Kevin, like most things Zac does. He knows he should probably show up fashionably late, that's what people always say, so he puts on his party clothes and lies down on his bed on top of the blankets.
Kevin wakes up a little after 4 o'clock in the morning. He thinks that's too fashionable a lateness to show up at Zac's house, so he gets under the covers and goes back to sleep until 7 o'clock.
When he gets up officially, Kevin feels really bad about not going somewhere he said he'd go. He asks his mom if he can borrow the car.
"Where are you going this early on a Saturday?" Kevin's mom asks.
"My friend's house," Kevin says. His mom looks at him like she's trying figure out where to hammer a nail in him.
"No," Kevin's mom says. "I'm driving Nick over to the Cyruses in a little bit."
"Swizzlesticks," Kevin says. He borrows Joe's bike instead and rides over to Zac's house.
~*~
Kevin realizes only after he arrives at Zac's house and throws the bike on his lawn that he's still wearing his party clothes that he slept in last night and they're all wrinkly. His armpits are definitely damp and his cheeks are probably red like they have too much rouge on them. Kevin only knows what rouge is because his grandma tells him it looks like he has too much rouge on all the time.
When Kevin rings the doorbell, there's no answer, so he knocks the door and waits. When Zac answers, he looks surprised. He's wearing the clothes he wore to school yesterday which are also all wrinkly and his hair is messy like he was spinning on top of his head. Kevin wonders if there was breakdancing at this party.
"Hey," Kevin says. "Is the party over?"
"Yeah," Zac says. He opens the door wider. "Come on in."
Kevin walks in and slips his shoes off. It's a reflex at this point, to take his shoes off at the door, because his mom always yelled at them about it. He's almost done it a few times at school. That would've been embarrassing.
"I was just gonna go take a shower," Zac says. He points up at the ceiling. "Did you want to..."
"What? No, no," Kevin says, shaking his head like he's turning down a tasty treat he really wants but would go straight to his thighs. God, does he want Zac to go straight to his thighs.
"No, I just mean," Zac says quickly, "you can wait in my room, and we can hang out in there."
"Oh, okay."
Zac starts up the stairs and Kevin follows him. Zac points out his bedroom door, and Kevin goes in. He wants to follow Zac to the shower. They showered at camp together tons of times, and not exactly because they had to. Kevin sits on the edge of Zac's unmade bed instead and waits for him. Eventually he gets too antsy to sit there, so he makes the bed.
"Did you just make my bed?" Zac asks from the doorway. He put his same clothes back on but his hair is damp.
"Yeah, what of it?" Kevin says. He pulls one corner of the blanket down, a gesture of hope.
Zac sits down next to him on the bed, and their thighs do touch.
"I'm sorry I'm like 14 hours late to your party," Kevin says.
"It wasn't that great anyway," Zac says. "Do you wanna lay down?" He doesn't say "with me" but Kevin assumes that's implied. He's not going to just lie down in Zac's bed by himself.
They lie down next to each other, facing each other, and it reminds Kevin of their beds at camp those last few days, pushed close enough together that they could act like they only had the room of one bed. Zac's damp hair sticks to his cheek, and Kevin reaches out his hand and pushes it back.
Zac is holding his broken arm against his stomach. Kevin's never really seen it up close and uncovered, so he reads the signatures on it. There are a lot of girl names.
"How'd you really break your arm?" Kevin says.
"I told you," Zac says. Kevin thinks if Zac's parents trust him enough to leave him home alone for the weekend, Zac probably never has to sneak out of anywhere. He leaves it be and pets the cast, all the way up to where Zac's fingers are sticking out.
"I don't really have a girlfriend," Zac says, and then he moves his head closer and kisses Kevin on the lips, twice, quickly.
"Not yet," Kevin says, and he open-mouth kisses Zac back. He pulls on Zac's leg until he hitches it over Kevin's hip, and then rolls onto his back, tugging Zac on top of him, being careful of his broken arm.
~*~
On Monday Zac sits behind Kevin in homeroom and pokes him in the back until the teacher yells at him to go to his assigned seat. Kevin likes his regular high school experience so far.
~*~THE END~*~
Nikki is Nikki Blonsky, Ashley is Ashley Tisdale, Vanessa is Vanessa Hudgens, Frankie is the Bonus Jonas, andddd that's it. Lol Disney RPS AU :(((