Discussion Post 1
KINK MEME AND DISCUSSION HAVE MOVED: http://hetalia-kink.dreamwidth.org/
Talk with other anons from hetalia_kink about everything and anything related to the kink meme.
Allowable topics include, but are not limited to: Characterization, Fills (past or ongoing), mechanics of kinks, seconding threads, prompts, writing help, general kink meme fic discussion, ( Read more... )
I like the idea of Italy's "older self" telling him to go back and I like how you portrayed Italy's distress and shame at himself for running away, especially after how Germany called out to him. It really did feel like something Veneziano would do - being so afraid and running away, eventhough a part of him would have stayed by Germany's side, but his fear was just too much.
I also liked how you opened the fill - there's this sense of foreboding that made me want to read more, to find out what really happened and I think it worked in capturing a reader's attention. I thought it might have been better if you actually kept the identity of Italy's "older self" hidden until much later when he realized his other self was from the future (?). Like um, instead of "older self", perhaps a more ambiguous description (like "the man who sounded vaguely familiar", etc.). I find that might add to the mysterious-like atmosphere this fill already had and could also have been used to foreshadow future!Italy's real identity.
But all in all, I think you did a really good job with this. And though a lot of readers said they liked to read an expansion of this, I actually thought this worked because it was short; like a glimpse of a scene into Italy's own embarrassment of his weakness/failures and how he overcame it in the end... the brevity of it adds to the charm and emotional depth of this fill. It kind of reminds me a little of HetaOni too, lol.
Great job, a!a :)
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment