Inglourious Muddbloods Part 5-- Starring Arthur the Apache
anonymous
December 1 2010, 04:48:29 UTC
“I still don’t get why you’re not the one doing this instead of us,” said America as England adjusted Canada’s robes.
“Because somebody is liable to recognize me. As long as you two don’t wear your glasses, they won’t recognize you. All Germany has to do is leave his hair as it is and Russia can just take off that bloody coat of his. It’s not like the survivors are going to be around anyway, and those sketches aren’t worth shit except for mine,” said England, struggling to find all of the robe’s snaps. Russia had tried to figure out the robes himself and had ended up a tangled mess. Germany seemed to be the only one with the faculties to put them on properly. “So, just remember. America and Canada were sent to Hogwarts on the insistence of their Scotch mother back in the US. Russia is a Death-Eater sympathizer here to check on the situation in Britain. Germany is Russia’s good friend from Durmstrang, and you all met while Canada and America were backpacking in Europe, as wealthy American graduates are wont to do -”
“I’m American, again?”
“Shut up, Canada,” said England, finishing the final snaps, finally, the robe on straight.
“What else about us? What are our names?” asked Germany.
“Just use your human names. Nobody knows you by them. Canada, you be Jones.”
“I hate you,” said Canada, “I really do.”
“And our histories?” asked Germany, “Surely we must have more detail -”
“You walk into the tavern and Canada and America happen to see one of their favorite professors. All of you stop for a chat. You should be able to set up the next rendezvous from there.”
“That’s not a history,” said Germany.
“You are afraid to make things up?” asked Russia.
“Making things up as you go is how you get yourself killed. I want a history.”
“You shouldn’t need one. I got the impression from the Hog’s Head that it’s not the sort of place where people ask questions about each other,” said England, “The story is just in case they do -”
“We’re going by the impression that they are not the sort of people who ask questions?”
“My impressions are usually very good, Germany,” said England, “and either way, you shouldn’t be there very long. You should be fine.”
“Usually,” said Germany.
“You have a headmaster to meet,” said England, smoothing out the wrinkles on Canada’s second-hand robes, “Get going.”
“Because somebody is liable to recognize me. As long as you two don’t wear your glasses, they won’t recognize you. All Germany has to do is leave his hair as it is and Russia can just take off that bloody coat of his. It’s not like the survivors are going to be around anyway, and those sketches aren’t worth shit except for mine,” said England, struggling to find all of the robe’s snaps. Russia had tried to figure out the robes himself and had ended up a tangled mess. Germany seemed to be the only one with the faculties to put them on properly. “So, just remember. America and Canada were sent to Hogwarts on the insistence of their Scotch mother back in the US. Russia is a Death-Eater sympathizer here to check on the situation in Britain. Germany is Russia’s good friend from Durmstrang, and you all met while Canada and America were backpacking in Europe, as wealthy American graduates are wont to do -”
“I’m American, again?”
“Shut up, Canada,” said England, finishing the final snaps, finally, the robe on straight.
“What else about us? What are our names?” asked Germany.
“Just use your human names. Nobody knows you by them. Canada, you be Jones.”
“I hate you,” said Canada, “I really do.”
“And our histories?” asked Germany, “Surely we must have more detail -”
“You walk into the tavern and Canada and America happen to see one of their favorite professors. All of you stop for a chat. You should be able to set up the next rendezvous from there.”
“That’s not a history,” said Germany.
“You are afraid to make things up?” asked Russia.
“Making things up as you go is how you get yourself killed. I want a history.”
“You shouldn’t need one. I got the impression from the Hog’s Head that it’s not the sort of place where people ask questions about each other,” said England, “The story is just in case they do -”
“We’re going by the impression that they are not the sort of people who ask questions?”
“My impressions are usually very good, Germany,” said England, “and either way, you shouldn’t be there very long. You should be fine.”
“Usually,” said Germany.
“You have a headmaster to meet,” said England, smoothing out the wrinkles on Canada’s second-hand robes, “Get going.”
XXX
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