So An Alien Walks into the Capitol... Part 1 [2/5]
anonymous
February 28 2010, 07:48:46 UTC
Anon from before, back with some more wacky goodness. *** Mark Chang was bored. This whole ‘Field Trip’ thing didn’t seem all that interesting to begin with (who’d want to take a trip to a field? He’d never get some of these earth things…), and now that he was in DC, he’s opinion hadn’t changed at all. Yeah, wars were cool, but they cut out all the blood and explosions in the memorials, making them lame.
The group was looking at some giant statue of a dead guy sitting across a giant pool from a giant phallic symbol or something, when he smelt it of all things. It permeated the air and hit him full force, stunning him for a bit as he coughed violently.
“Phew! What is that smell? It’s horrifying!” He shouted, causing several people to stare.
“Dude, what are you talking about?” Timmy asked.
“How can you not smell that horrifying stench? It’s everywhere!”
“Uh, you okay Mark?”
“How can I be okay with that smell? It smells like…like…” he looked around, trying to find the source, and his eyes settled on a fairly young (in human terms) blond haired, blue eyed man eating a cheeseburger and talking to a blond haired, green eyed man with the bushiest eyebrows Mark had ever seen.
“I don’t smell anything,” Cosmo, who was in balloon form, said, “and I’m usually pretty good at smelling things.”
“Are you sure you’re not just making it up?” Wanda, also in balloon form, asked.
“Like…him,/i>.” Without warning, Mark broke away from the group and charged the two men.
“Mark wait!” Timmy started chasing after him, but was pulled back by his balloons.
“Maybe we should just stay here,” Cosmo offered.
“I’m sure Mark can handle himself,” Wanda agreed.
“We can’t just let him attack random people in the Capitol, what if he gets found out?!”
“It might not be so bad, sport…”
“Yeah, I doubt Arthur and his friend will do anything bad to him.”
“Well I guess if you, hey wait, how do you know his name’s Arthur?” The balloons started sweating profusely.
“Um, well, doesn’t he look like an Arthur?” Wanda offered.
“Yeah, it’s not like we know he’s Arthur Kirkland, aka the nation of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and North Ireland and a link between the magical world and the human world.”
“He’s what?!”
“Cosmo you idiot!”
“I know nothing!” He spontaneously popped.
“Why’s Mark attacking him?!”
“Actually it looks like he’s attacking the other guy…and failing.”
Sure enough, Mark had proceeded to charge straight at the blue-eyed guy, arms swinging wildly, only to be stopped by a hand to the forehead. The man seemed completely unfazed by the surprise attack, as he continued to eat his cheeseburger, and Arthur face palmed.
Timmy rushed forward, Cosmo and Wanda appearing on his chest as pins, and pulled Mark away from the man.
“Sorry about my friend here,” Timmy explained, “he’s, uh, from Europe?” “Ah, that makes sense,” the man said, “people from Europe are crazy.” This earned him a whack on the head from Arthur. “I meant the continent! Everyone knows you’re too anti-social to count as part of Europe.” This earned him another smack.
“Yeah, anyway we should get going…C’mon Mark…”
“No!! I know he’s here dude!!”
“I wish he would stop shouting…” Timmy muttered under his breath. A flash of wands later and Mark’s mouth was shut.
“Is he okay?” The man had finished off the cheeseburger and was now slurping on a soda.
“Your face probably just scared him,” Arthur chuckled.
“If anything it was your eyebrows.”
“You mean those are real?” Timmy and Mark asked simultaneously. Arthur glared at them and Timmy had enough sense to look sheepish, while Mark just kept staring and added a, “Mind blown…”
“Anyway, your tour group seems to have ditched you,” Arthur pointed out.
“What?” Timmy turned to find that the rest of the class had indeed already left.
So An Alien Walks into the Capitol... Part 2 [2/5]
anonymous
February 28 2010, 07:52:13 UTC
F@#!, messed up the editing T_T *** “It’s cool. You’re the group from Dimmsdale right? They’re heading over to the WWII memorial next.”
“Why don’t you walk the lads over?” Arthur suggested, “After all, it is your fault they’ve been separated from their classmates.”
“Pft, the kid attacked me, but sure, I’ll walk them over.” He finished off the soda and tossed it in the nearby garbage. “The name’s Alfred Jones by the way. He’s Arthur Kirkland.”
“Timmy Turner. And my friend’s Mark Chang.”
“’Sup. Why do you smell so bad dude?” It was Timmy’s turn to face palm as Arthur chuckled.
“Hey, the economy’s pretty bad right now, so I can’t get my regular soap and stuff! Besides, it’s a manly smell."
“Naw dude, you smell like...” All of a sudden a small, grey head poked out of some nearby bushes, “TONY!!” Mark screamed and jumped in the bushes after him.
The three of them stared at the bushes a bit before Alfred walked over and yanked them both out, keeping them at an arm’s length while they continued to try and punch and kick each other.
“Tony what are you doing here?” he asked.
“Can’t trust you with that f@!#ing limey. Now I find out you’re hanging out with Yugotrash.”
“You are you here?!” Mark snapped. “Why don’t you leave before you stink up this planet too?”
“Was here first. You get your s!#@ and leave.”
“Make me!” The two started slapping each other while Alfred and Arthur turned to Timmy for an explanation.
“Don’t look at me! I’m only ten, how am I supposed to know what’s going on?” Arthur sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Cosmo, Wanda, what did you do?”
“Why do you just assume it was us?” Cosmo asked as he poofed into his real form. Wanda joined him soon after.
“Because it usually is.”
“Guys! What are you-” Timmy started before Arthur interrupted.
“Calm down. No one else is around and Alfred’s an idiot who doesn’t believe in fairies.”
“Are you on about that again Artie? Of course fairies don’t exist! Those transforming robots of yours are really cool though! Where did you get them?”
“Internet.”
“Fantastic, now why do you two want to start an intergalactic war?”
“Intergalactic war?” Alfred perked up, “That sounds-”
“So cool!” Timmy finished. Arthur and Wanda shot them both glares. “I mean, Oh no, how horrible.”
“Wait,” Alfred pulled Mark up so they were face to face, “does this mean you’re an alien?”
“I am the Warrior Prince from Yugopatamia! Tony and his kind have been our sworn enemies ever since that time, and I must exact my revenge for-” “That’s awesome! But, I’ll need to see a green card…boss’s orders.” “You what now?”
“Yeah I can’t have illegal aliens in the country…”
“But…Tony…”
“Oh, he has a green card. No worries there. Listen, I can’t just let you wage intergalactic war in the US without the proper paperwork.”
“But what about my revenge?”
“I’ll let it slide for now, but no more fighting on US soil, and this includes my territories and all my embassies.” He dropped Mark back on the ground and turned to face Tony.
“You shouldn’t sneak out of the house like that.” Tony mutter something under his breath, but all anyone could pick out was the word ‘limey.’ “Just wait for me at home, ‘kay?” The alien reluctantly nodded, so Alfred dropped him on the ground as well as he slunk away, presumably back to Alfred’s house.
Alfred turned to face everyone only to find them staring at him in disbelief. “What?”
“Nothing…” Arthur said, “Just…nothing. You handled that surprisingly well.”
He simply shrugged. “Well someone had too. C’mon, let’s get you kids back to your group.”
Cosmo and Wanda disguised themselves as balloons again, and they found the rest of their class with no incident to speak.
Field trips, Mark decided at the end of the day, were a waste of time.
OP wants to hug you, and feed you, and drag you to her home and call you "Britty"
anonymous
February 28 2010, 16:16:42 UTC
This is so, so awesome. Tony Vs Mark, it's kinda cute. Oh Alfred, why so you? And now Mark Chang Vs the people in the immigration office! I think I love you with the heat of a thousand suns.
Whatever Happened to That Atlantis Chick Anyway? Part 1 [3/5]
anonymous
March 1 2010, 03:16:50 UTC
This is extremely historically inaccurate, but since when has FOP ever worried about that? *** “Atlantis? You mean Little Miss Look at Me and My Utopia? Yes, I remember her. She had it easy, fertile lands, great access to the ocean, the fact that she wasn’t stuck in the middle of a desert. It’s quite easy to build your society on happiness and rainbows when you’re not spending half your time simply trying to survive.
“She’s always had it so easy and she never even knew it; was never grateful for it. Constantly criticizing me on, you know everything. One time I snapped and told her that our circumstances were completely different and that she should just keep her nose out of other people’s business, and you know what she said?
‘I’m just like trying to like, help you out, you know, so you can like be as awesome as like, me. You don’t have to like, be all like, like that.’
“Exactly like that. Girl couldn’t form a coherent sentence to save her life. Don’t know how she became so ‘advanced,’ but I always assumed it was just bull anyway. That’s another thing; whenever she was over she would always criticize my culture. The pyramids especially, but I think she was just jealous. My pyramids will last forever, and where did you say her city was now?
“You say she’s gone, well I say good riddance.”
***
“I remember her…she was…nice. Nice enough anyway. Nice enough when I was over at her place. Real pain when she was at mine though. Never liked any of my art…or my philosophers…or my sports…or my plays…now that I think about it, she never really liked anything of mine, or I guess, she just thought her stuff was better. I don’t think it was, but I guess that’s just a matter of opinion, as they say. I’m sure someone says it.
“She would constantly complain to me about the others though. Especially Egypt and Rome. I’m pretty sure she hated Egypt, to be honest, but I’m equally sure she was crushing on Rome. Strange isn’t it, that she’d act the same towards both of them despite hating one and loving the other? Oh, am I digressing? Sorry about that.
“Um, she hated my stuff, complained about the others…I don’t think we had much contact other than that, to tell you the truth. She never wanted to fight, something about being a ‘peaceful utopia,’ she brought up the peaceful utopia thing a lot, and she never wanted to trade either, said she already had everything she needed and it was the best. Strange isn’t it? I mean I have a lot of cool stuff, but I still trade with the others, because they have cool stuff too, like silk. Have you seen some of the stuff that China has? I showed it to Atlantis one time and she had never seen it before, but still she refused to trade with him. Something about not needing it, but I think she was just jealous.
“Oh sorry, the point? Well, I guess it’s sad that she’s gone, but only because it could happen to any of us you know? I mean, she was recluse to begin with, so the world stage won’t really change much. Does that help?”
***
“I only met her a few times, always when she was with Rome. I just assumed she was jealous that Rome spent more time with me, but why I’d never know. I would have been glad if he did spend more time with her. Get rid of both of them that way.
“The only interaction I ever had with her was when she would try and get a rise out of me. Once I did respond and try to challenge her, but she backed down and recited some spiel.
‘Fighting is like, so beneath me. I wouldn’t like expect someone as like backwards as you to like understand. How Rome can like put up with you I’ll like never know.’
“I realized that she was nothing more than an empty vessel. Something that would shout whatever popped into her head and had no intention of backing it up. To be honest, she was a disgrace.
“No, I’m not upset in the slightest that she’s gone.”
recaptcha: anonymous unmasks. ReCaptcha wants me to deanon this...
Whatever Happened to That Atlantis Chick Anyway? Part 2 [3/5]
anonymous
March 1 2010, 03:20:58 UTC
*** “Ah Atlantis, she was really cute. Not that we ever actually did anything. She’d never let me get that close. Pretty sure she was a virgin. Oh is that not the point?
“Well, she would always find me at the strangest of times and show me some of her stuff, which was pretty cool because she had a lot of neat stuff, but she would always scoff at new ideas whenever I’d suggest them. Said she’d always have better ones, which I think is just crazy. I mean, I’m always encountering new peoples with new ideas and sometimes they have some great new ideas.
“Anyway she was always inviting me back to her place and when I couldn’t go because I was fighting a war at the time or something then she would usually cry and scream and call me an idiot before storming off. I never took much notice of that because there were always bigger things going on. She never could understand the big picture, now that I think about it. “I know she and Egypt didn’t get along. Germania didn’t seem to like her much either. Maybe that’s a wrong way of putting it. It’s more like he was indifferent to her, which is actually worse than hating her. I mean, if he hated her then they’d at least be equals, but he felt she was beneath him, so he ignored her.
“It’s a shame she’s gone, like I said, she was cute, but, I guess in a big picture kind of way, it’s probably for the best.”
***
“Who’s that, aru? Oh, that bitchy little fish girl? I didn’t know her all that well. Only ever talked to her once, if that.
“That interaction was more of her randomly showing up out of nowhere and cursing me out for no reason. I told you, I didn’t even know who she was, and would have continued my existence not knowing happily, aru.
“I don’t recall what she wanted from me in the first place. I remember I was apparently ‘getting in the way of true love,’ at one point in her rant. Eventually she did go on about how I ‘thought I was better than her, but clearly my crazy Eastern ways were backwards,’ and how ‘she was the only one who knew what real culture was,’ aru. No I’m paraphrasing actually, she said ‘like’ a lot for some reason, aru.
“I did suggest we become trading partners, now that I knew she existed, while she was visiting, but she just slapped me. It didn’t have much power behind it, so I knew she would never be a real threat to me, but still, you don’t go around slapping other nations like that, aru.
“Honestly, whether she’s here or not, I don’t care. My existence will continue on as always, aru.”
***
“See?” the green fairy said, holding up his notes, “That’s everyone who matters. I told you it would be fine if one little nation sunk to the bottom of the sea one measly time.”
“You didn’t sink it once, YOU SANK IT NINE TIMES!” the larger fairy bellowed.
“Maybe so…but in the end, the number of times doesn’t matter either…does it?”
“I suppose not,” He sighed, “Alright, a deal’s a deal; you can still be a fairy.”
“Woohoo! Look out world! Cosmo’s back!”
“Look out indeed…”
Meanwhile, somewhere at the bottom of the ocean…
“Like no fair guys! Like, why won’t someone like, save me! It’s like, dark and like, scary and there’s like, fish down here! Like so uncool, this is like Egypt’s fault! She could like, never understand the like perfection of my like utopia! Or like, that China bastard, he’s like always been like vying for my like spot, or like maybe like Germania, he’s like always been like jealous…always like trying to keep me from Rome.
“Rome…wait for me Rome, my love! I’ll be back for you soon!”
A/N: It goes Mama Egypt, Mama Greece, Germania, Rome, China, if I didn't make that clear. And god damnit, now I want to write a sequal where Atlantis comes back, finds Rome dead, and falls in love with Italy. Bad plot bunnies, I don't have time for that!
Re: Whatever Happened to That Atlantis Chick Anyway? Part 2 [3/5]
anonymous
March 1 2010, 06:52:02 UTC
SEQUEL SEQUEL NOW!!!
this is great!! haha made my day (night) plus i guessed 4 out of the 5 correct to!!
I love the idea of cosmo interviewing the nations so that he can prove no one cared about atlantis XD it would be really funny to see her try to release a kraken(sp?) on germany cause he spends to much time with italy lol i love your fills so much!!!!
OP wants to know in wich flavor do you want your internets.
anonymous
March 1 2010, 11:02:25 UTC
Because you have won two.
Also, why I'm feeling that the only reason Cosmo got away with this was that Fairy World-tan neither could stand the parody Sue incredibly arrogant little fish nation.
(recaptcha: powers argues. no, reCaptcha, they are kning of agreeing in the same issue)
It's Like History, But With a Twist! Part 1[4/6]
anonymous
March 3 2010, 07:32:07 UTC
This was my favorite episode, I'm such a history nerd. It's also rushed because I'm super busy and I might not get the next one up until next week due to the super busy thing.Sorry *** “Live! From Timmy’s tree house…it’s, the Timmy Turner Show! Join Timmy and his special guests as he tries to complete the big history report he blew off. And now, heeere’s Timmy!”
“Thank you, thank you. Hey, we have a great show for you tonight. Here to help me with my report are three of the founder fathers themselves…”
Meanwhile, in 1776…
“Hey, Washington,” America said as he approached the man who was currently chopping up a wooden table in the far corner of Independence Hall, “I know you’re all about to sign the Declaration in a bit, but I was wondering if I could talk to you…”
“Hm? Of course Alfred. I’ll always have time for you.” And with that he vanished.
America gave himself five seconds to let it sink in before panicking and running off to find Franklin.
“Beeeeeeeen!!!” He shouted as he screeched to a halt in front of him. “Washington mysteriously disappeared mysteriously!”
“That’s odd. I was just-” and then he vanished too.
“J-Jefferson!!”
“What are you shouting about now, Alfred?”
“Washington and Franklin just-” but before he could finish that thought, Jefferson was gone as well.
“Why me, why today?!?! This is England’s fault…somehow.”
Meanwhile, in the present…
“You guys can’t just run away like that,” Timmy said as he got his guests seated once more, “If you get lost that could really mess things up, but more importantly I’ll never get my report done!”
“Sorry…” the three founders said in unison as they took their respective seats and Franklin got struck by lightning.
“Timmy!” Cosmo shouted as he flew in from the window, “Air Force Zero is coming in fast!”
“Air Force Zero?! Wait, I thought that was for the president!”
“That’s Air Force One, sweetie.” Wanda corrected.
“Then who’s in Air Force Zero?”
That question was answered five seconds later when a muscular blond man came crashing through the window.
“HAHAHAHA!” He laughed loudly as he stood up, seemingly unharmed with his trip through the quadruple-pain glass. “Not to worry, the HERO has arrived!”
“Who…?” Timmy started to ask, but was interrupted by a cry of “Alfred!” from the men on the couch.
“You can’t just crash through windows like that!” Franklin exclaimed.
“You need to use your head boy,” Jefferson fussed as he brushed stray glass from the man’s hair.
“What if you had gotten hurt?” Washington added.
“But guuys, I’m fiine…” the man whined.
“Would someone explain to me what the heck’s going on?!” Timmy shouted.
The founders blanched, blushed, and stood around awkwardly for a bit before Washington caught sight of a wooden post off to the side and ran over to chop it.
“You might want to stop him…” the man said.
“I’ll go get him.” Wanda poofed off after him.
“Who are you? How do you know them? Why are you here? Answer my questions, or I’ll…do something…”
“Alfred F. Jones, I’m with the government. Long story. I sensed a…disturbance and came to investigate, and may I ask, what the heck are you doing with my founding fathers in a tree house talk show studio thing?” “Uh…well, wait a minute, your founders?”
“Well you see lad,” Franklin explained, “Alfred is sort of the personification of America.”
“What? Is that possible?”
“I’m standing here, aren’t I? Now why are they here, and not signing my Declaration of Independence?!”
“Relax Al,” Jefferson said, scribbling something on his parchment, “Timmy here is trying to do a history report and asked us to help. We’ll go right back when we’re done.”
“…is that safe?”
“Yeah sure why not?” Timmy offered.
“Well, okay, I’ll allow it, but I need to stay right here to make sure you put them back when you’re done.”
“When did you become all grown-up?” Washington commented when Wanda dragged him back. Alfred shrugged.
“It must be the new bifocals,” Franklin added, “they are quite nice…where did you get them lad?”
“Oh, I got them from Mexico in 1845. It was pretty sweet.”
“Okay, this whole catching up thing is great and all, but I’ve still got a report to do, so focus back here, ‘kay?” Timmy said as he sat behind his desk. Alfred found a seat in the audience and the Founders sat back on the couch.
It's Like History, But With a Twist! Part 2 [4/6]
anonymous
March 3 2010, 07:35:55 UTC
Everything was going great…until it stopped being so great.
“Timmy, we need to take a break,” Wanda nagged. “We need to get these guys back to their time period; they’ve been here too long all ready!”
“Relax Wanda. Besides, I think if history had changed, we’d have noticed now, right?”
As if on cue, everything started changing, and everyone left the safety of the tree house to investigate. Electricity vanished and everything became more, well…
“You bloody wanker!” A now specs-less Alfred charged, grabbed Timmy by the shirt and started shaking him, “I ought to sock you one for this, git!”
“I say, don’t get your knickers in a twist now, old bean!” Timmy said, grappling against Alfred’s strength. He let him drop to the ground.
“Oh, piss off!” Everything became more British.
“What’s going on?” Jefferson asked as he and the rest of the founders wandered over.
“Because you guys have been gone to long, America is still a British Colony, and deprived of electricity.” Timmy explained.
“Don’t forget about taxation without representation!” Washington added.
“Huh?”
“’Ello ‘ello! Tax man here!” A random guy said, snatching Cosmo and Wanda’s wands right out of their hands. “Wand tax.” He explained, tipping his hat and leaving as suddenly as he’d shown up.
“I bloody hate taxation without representation…” Alfred lamented. “And core blimey I miss Texas. I can’t see a thing!”
“Whine whine whine,” Timmy taunted, “why don’t you do something about it!” “You git!” He lunged forward and started strangling the boy. “This is your bleeding fault!”
Jefferson and Washington managed to pull the nation off before he did lasting damage.
“You better have a way to fix this…”
“Ooh! I know!” Cosmo flew back up to the tree house and came back down, riding on a scooter. “We can take everyone back on the Time Scooter!” “That’s a great idea Cosmo…that was weird.”
“Almost as weird as me speaking British.” As everyone else scrambled on the scooter, Alfred jotted something down on a piece of paper and handed it to Timmy. “Give this to Colonial me, and no bloody peaking! I think you’ve messed up enough already, savvy?”
He nodded and stuffed it in his pocket before starting the scooter and blasting off into the past.
Meanwhile, in 1776…
“AAAAARGH!!!”
“Calm down Alfred! Just because three of the most important people in this revolution mysteriously vanished at the same time to god knows where doesn’t mean you’ll be stuck as a Colony for life!”
“Yeah, England could decide he’d rather just kill you for defying him…”
“Now that I think about it, we’ll all be hung for treason as well…”
“Not helping guys!” Alfred snapped. He spotted Benedict Arnold off in a corner all by himself, plotting and decided to ask him if he’d had any progress.
“Hey Benny! Any luck on finding the others?”
“Gah! Um, no, not yet…I’m not plotting betrayal or anything…and it’s Benedict. Benedict Arnold.”
“Whatever Benny…” he sighed and turned around to walk away, but remembered something else he wanted to ask, and turned back to find George Washington in his place instead.
“Georgie! There you are!” Alfred grabbed the man into a tight bear hug. “You had me worried! Where are Jefferson and Franklin?”
“Can’t…breathe…” the nation let him go. “There, um, around…somewhere. Check over there while I go talk to Hancock…”
“Wait a second, something seems off…are you sure you’re Washington?”
“Of course I am! Can’t you tell by my white hair, wooden teeth, and love of all things free?”
“Well, good enough for me!” He followed him over to where Hancock was busy signing stuff.
“Hey Hancock, you mind signing this Declaration of Surrenderpendence for me, your friend, George Washington?”
“Sure-wait, isn’t that bad?”
“What?! You’re giving up!?”
“Yes Alfred. I’m sorry, but I just don’t think you have what it takes to beat England. It’s best if we give up now.”
Tears started to form in the young nation’s eyes as Washington coerced Hancock into signing his document, when all of a sudden a blinding flash of light appeared in the middle of the room, revealing the missing founders and some kid on some wheeled contraption of some kind.
Washington jumped up and shot his teeth out, hitting Hancock’s hand and preventing the demise of America before he even had a chance to begin.
It's Like History, But With a Twist! Part 3 [4/6]
anonymous
March 3 2010, 07:38:39 UTC
“Don’t listen to him! I cannot tell a lie I am the real George Washington! Can’t you tell by the white hair and the wooden teeth and the love of all things free?”
“Oh no you didn’t…” the two Washingtons prepared for what would probably have been an epic fistfight if Alfred hadn’t interrupted by hugging the new Washington.
“I knew it! I knew he was a fake! Don’t you ever leave me again ever! None of you!” He shot a look at the other two over Washington’s shoulder.
“Can’t…breathe…”
“Sorry!”
Jefferson had, meanwhile, unmasked the villain to be none other than Benedict Arnold.
“And I would have gotten away with it to, if it weren’t for that-”
“Yeah yeah, we’ve heard it all before,” Timmy waved him off. “Well, all you have to do now is sign the Declaration of Independence and we’ll be on our way.”
“We can’t!” Hancock said, “Washington’s wooden teeth and love of all things free broke my hand! Now we’re one signature short!”
“Dude there’s like, twenty other people in the room. Can’t they sign it?”
“Oh yeah…” he wandered off to find another signature.
“Oh! I almost forgot, Alfred,” the nation turned and Timmy handed him the piece of paper. “What is it? Finical tips for when you get the stock market started? Secret British military plans for an easy victory? The suspense is killing me!”
Alfred read the note and whacked Timmy upside the head.
“Ouch! That hurt! What was that for?!”
“Sorry, but the note said it was all your fault and that I should whack you upside the head,” he handed Timmy the note so he could read if for himself. “I don’t know who this Usa is, but the handwriting’s similar to mine, so I trust him. Or her. Or it.”
“Figures…” Timmy started up the Time Scooter and he and his fairies went back home.
Meanwhile, in class the next day…
“You know Turner, most teachers would find this style of delivering a report creative and deserving of reward,” Mr. Crocker said, scribbling Timmy’s grade down. “I however am not one of them. You fail!”
Timmy sighed dejectedly at his grade when the sound of a plane swooping low was heard throughout the classroom.
“It’s Air Force Zero!” one of the children exclaimed when they ran over to the window.
“Oh no…”
Sure enough, five seconds later Alfred Jones came crashing through the window.
“HAHAHA!” He laughed after standing up and brushing the glass off.
“You! Who are you? And you better be paying for those windows!” Crocker shouted.
“Sorry sorry, put it on my tab. I’m Alfred F. Jones and I’m with the Department of Education. I have it under good authority that you just failed one Timmy Turner, correct?”
“Yes, but I don’t see how that’s-”
“Well, the higher-ups want me to come and make that an A. Since there government bigwigs, you understand, right?”
“You can’t just-”
“Sure I can!” He grabbed the F and pulled out a giant stamp that changed it to an A. “See? Just did.” Alfred handed the paper back to Timmy. “Let’s just say we’re even now, git.”
Re: It's Like History, But With a Twist! Part 3 [4/6]
anonymous
March 3 2010, 20:50:04 UTC
What, I dont even... British!Al, The declaration of Surrenderpendnce, Air Force Zero, Al's note to his past self!!! Im flabbergasted this is just amazing!!!!
(and this was on of my fav eps as well haha must... chop... wood!!!!)
These are getting more hilarious by every sentence anon i love it so much.
OP says HAI~! * waves american flag before her own country-tan jumps and mauls her*
anonymous
March 4 2010, 02:28:44 UTC
And to think I hadn't see the original version of this chapter in full form... but your version is way better! also, the Air Force Zero and the windows Smashing! (By the way, now we need Hetalia fan art in FOP style. Because, really) *hugs Author!Anon and feeds with their favourite foods*
The recaptcha says "has nobles". This recaptcha is very smart indeed.
***
Mark Chang was bored. This whole ‘Field Trip’ thing didn’t seem all that interesting to begin with (who’d want to take a trip to a field? He’d never get some of these earth things…), and now that he was in DC, he’s opinion hadn’t changed at all. Yeah, wars were cool, but they cut out all the blood and explosions in the memorials, making them lame.
The group was looking at some giant statue of a dead guy sitting across a giant pool from a giant phallic symbol or something, when he smelt it of all things. It permeated the air and hit him full force, stunning him for a bit as he coughed violently.
“Phew! What is that smell? It’s horrifying!” He shouted, causing several people to stare.
“Dude, what are you talking about?” Timmy asked.
“How can you not smell that horrifying stench? It’s everywhere!”
“Uh, you okay Mark?”
“How can I be okay with that smell? It smells like…like…” he looked around, trying to find the source, and his eyes settled on a fairly young (in human terms) blond haired, blue eyed man eating a cheeseburger and talking to a blond haired, green eyed man with the bushiest eyebrows Mark had ever seen.
“I don’t smell anything,” Cosmo, who was in balloon form, said, “and I’m usually pretty good at smelling things.”
“Are you sure you’re not just making it up?” Wanda, also in balloon form, asked.
“Like…him,/i>.” Without warning, Mark broke away from the group and charged the two men.
“Mark wait!” Timmy started chasing after him, but was pulled back by his balloons.
“Maybe we should just stay here,” Cosmo offered.
“I’m sure Mark can handle himself,” Wanda agreed.
“We can’t just let him attack random people in the Capitol, what if he gets found out?!”
“It might not be so bad, sport…”
“Yeah, I doubt Arthur and his friend will do anything bad to him.”
“Well I guess if you, hey wait, how do you know his name’s Arthur?” The balloons started sweating profusely.
“Um, well, doesn’t he look like an Arthur?” Wanda offered.
“Yeah, it’s not like we know he’s Arthur Kirkland, aka the nation of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and North Ireland and a link between the magical world and the human world.”
“He’s what?!”
“Cosmo you idiot!”
“I know nothing!” He spontaneously popped.
“Why’s Mark attacking him?!”
“Actually it looks like he’s attacking the other guy…and failing.”
Sure enough, Mark had proceeded to charge straight at the blue-eyed guy, arms swinging wildly, only to be stopped by a hand to the forehead. The man seemed completely unfazed by the surprise attack, as he continued to eat his cheeseburger, and Arthur face palmed.
Timmy rushed forward, Cosmo and Wanda appearing on his chest as pins, and pulled Mark away from the man.
“Sorry about my friend here,” Timmy explained, “he’s, uh, from Europe?”
“Ah, that makes sense,” the man said, “people from Europe are crazy.” This earned him a whack on the head from Arthur. “I meant the continent! Everyone knows you’re too anti-social to count as part of Europe.” This earned him another smack.
“Yeah, anyway we should get going…C’mon Mark…”
“No!! I know he’s here dude!!”
“I wish he would stop shouting…” Timmy muttered under his breath. A flash of wands later and Mark’s mouth was shut.
“Is he okay?” The man had finished off the cheeseburger and was now slurping on a soda.
“Your face probably just scared him,” Arthur chuckled.
“If anything it was your eyebrows.”
“You mean those are real?” Timmy and Mark asked simultaneously. Arthur glared at them and Timmy had enough sense to look sheepish, while Mark just kept staring and added a, “Mind blown…”
“Anyway, your tour group seems to have ditched you,” Arthur pointed out.
“What?” Timmy turned to find that the rest of the class had indeed already left.
Reply
***
“It’s cool. You’re the group from Dimmsdale right? They’re heading over to the WWII memorial next.”
“Why don’t you walk the lads over?” Arthur suggested, “After all, it is your fault they’ve been separated from their classmates.”
“Pft, the kid attacked me, but sure, I’ll walk them over.” He finished off the soda and tossed it in the nearby garbage. “The name’s Alfred Jones by the way. He’s Arthur Kirkland.”
“Timmy Turner. And my friend’s Mark Chang.”
“’Sup. Why do you smell so bad dude?” It was Timmy’s turn to face palm as Arthur chuckled.
“Hey, the economy’s pretty bad right now, so I can’t get my regular soap and stuff! Besides, it’s a manly smell."
“Naw dude, you smell like...” All of a sudden a small, grey head poked out of some nearby bushes, “TONY!!” Mark screamed and jumped in the bushes after him.
The three of them stared at the bushes a bit before Alfred walked over and yanked them both out, keeping them at an arm’s length while they continued to try and punch and kick each other.
“Tony what are you doing here?” he asked.
“Can’t trust you with that f@!#ing limey. Now I find out you’re hanging out with Yugotrash.”
“You are you here?!” Mark snapped. “Why don’t you leave before you stink up this planet too?”
“Was here first. You get your s!#@ and leave.”
“Make me!” The two started slapping each other while Alfred and Arthur turned to Timmy for an explanation.
“Don’t look at me! I’m only ten, how am I supposed to know what’s going on?”
Arthur sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Cosmo, Wanda, what did you do?”
“Why do you just assume it was us?” Cosmo asked as he poofed into his real form. Wanda joined him soon after.
“Because it usually is.”
“Guys! What are you-” Timmy started before Arthur interrupted.
“Calm down. No one else is around and Alfred’s an idiot who doesn’t believe in fairies.”
“Are you on about that again Artie? Of course fairies don’t exist! Those transforming robots of yours are really cool though! Where did you get them?”
“Internet.”
“Fantastic, now why do you two want to start an intergalactic war?”
“Intergalactic war?” Alfred perked up, “That sounds-”
“So cool!” Timmy finished. Arthur and Wanda shot them both glares. “I mean, Oh no, how horrible.”
“Wait,” Alfred pulled Mark up so they were face to face, “does this mean you’re an alien?”
“I am the Warrior Prince from Yugopatamia! Tony and his kind have been our sworn enemies ever since that time, and I must exact my revenge for-”
“That’s awesome! But, I’ll need to see a green card…boss’s orders.”
“You what now?”
“Yeah I can’t have illegal aliens in the country…”
“But…Tony…”
“Oh, he has a green card. No worries there. Listen, I can’t just let you wage intergalactic war in the US without the proper paperwork.”
“But what about my revenge?”
“I’ll let it slide for now, but no more fighting on US soil, and this includes my territories and all my embassies.” He dropped Mark back on the ground and turned to face Tony.
“You shouldn’t sneak out of the house like that.” Tony mutter something under his breath, but all anyone could pick out was the word ‘limey.’ “Just wait for me at home, ‘kay?” The alien reluctantly nodded, so Alfred dropped him on the ground as well as he slunk away, presumably back to Alfred’s house.
Alfred turned to face everyone only to find them staring at him in disbelief. “What?”
“Nothing…” Arthur said, “Just…nothing. You handled that surprisingly well.”
He simply shrugged. “Well someone had too. C’mon, let’s get you kids back to your group.”
Cosmo and Wanda disguised themselves as balloons again, and they found the rest of their class with no incident to speak.
Field trips, Mark decided at the end of the day, were a waste of time.
Reply
I am stalking this fill so hard for your next updates.
Reply
This was epic! I bow down to your awesomeness. *_*
Reply
Tony Vs Mark, it's kinda cute.
Oh Alfred, why so you?
And now Mark Chang Vs the people in the immigration office!
I think I love you with the heat of a thousand suns.
Reply
***
“Atlantis? You mean Little Miss Look at Me and My Utopia? Yes, I remember her. She had it easy, fertile lands, great access to the ocean, the fact that she wasn’t stuck in the middle of a desert. It’s quite easy to build your society on happiness and rainbows when you’re not spending half your time simply trying to survive.
“She’s always had it so easy and she never even knew it; was never grateful for it. Constantly criticizing me on, you know everything. One time I snapped and told her that our circumstances were completely different and that she should just keep her nose out of other people’s business, and you know what she said?
‘I’m just like trying to like, help you out, you know, so you can like be as awesome as like, me. You don’t have to like, be all like, like that.’
“Exactly like that. Girl couldn’t form a coherent sentence to save her life. Don’t know how she became so ‘advanced,’ but I always assumed it was just bull anyway. That’s another thing; whenever she was over she would always criticize my culture. The pyramids especially, but I think she was just jealous. My pyramids will last forever, and where did you say her city was now?
“You say she’s gone, well I say good riddance.”
***
“I remember her…she was…nice. Nice enough anyway. Nice enough when I was over at her place. Real pain when she was at mine though. Never liked any of my art…or my philosophers…or my sports…or my plays…now that I think about it, she never really liked anything of mine, or I guess, she just thought her stuff was better. I don’t think it was, but I guess that’s just a matter of opinion, as they say. I’m sure someone says it.
“She would constantly complain to me about the others though. Especially Egypt and Rome. I’m pretty sure she hated Egypt, to be honest, but I’m equally sure she was crushing on Rome. Strange isn’t it, that she’d act the same towards both of them despite hating one and loving the other? Oh, am I digressing? Sorry about that.
“Um, she hated my stuff, complained about the others…I don’t think we had much contact other than that, to tell you the truth. She never wanted to fight, something about being a ‘peaceful utopia,’ she brought up the peaceful utopia thing a lot, and she never wanted to trade either, said she already had everything she needed and it was the best. Strange isn’t it? I mean I have a lot of cool stuff, but I still trade with the others, because they have cool stuff too, like silk. Have you seen some of the stuff that China has? I showed it to Atlantis one time and she had never seen it before, but still she refused to trade with him. Something about not needing it, but I think she was just jealous.
“Oh sorry, the point? Well, I guess it’s sad that she’s gone, but only because it could happen to any of us you know? I mean, she was recluse to begin with, so the world stage won’t really change much. Does that help?”
***
“I only met her a few times, always when she was with Rome. I just assumed she was jealous that Rome spent more time with me, but why I’d never know. I would have been glad if he did spend more time with her. Get rid of both of them that way.
“The only interaction I ever had with her was when she would try and get a rise out of me. Once I did respond and try to challenge her, but she backed down and recited some spiel.
‘Fighting is like, so beneath me. I wouldn’t like expect someone as like backwards as you to like understand. How Rome can like put up with you I’ll like never know.’
“I realized that she was nothing more than an empty vessel. Something that would shout whatever popped into her head and had no intention of backing it up. To be honest, she was a disgrace.
“No, I’m not upset in the slightest that she’s gone.”
recaptcha: anonymous unmasks. ReCaptcha wants me to deanon this...
Reply
“Ah Atlantis, she was really cute. Not that we ever actually did anything. She’d never let me get that close. Pretty sure she was a virgin. Oh is that not the point?
“Well, she would always find me at the strangest of times and show me some of her stuff, which was pretty cool because she had a lot of neat stuff, but she would always scoff at new ideas whenever I’d suggest them. Said she’d always have better ones, which I think is just crazy. I mean, I’m always encountering new peoples with new ideas and sometimes they have some great new ideas.
“Anyway she was always inviting me back to her place and when I couldn’t go because I was fighting a war at the time or something then she would usually cry and scream and call me an idiot before storming off. I never took much notice of that because there were always bigger things going on. She never could understand the big picture, now that I think about it.
“I know she and Egypt didn’t get along. Germania didn’t seem to like her much either. Maybe that’s a wrong way of putting it. It’s more like he was indifferent to her, which is actually worse than hating her. I mean, if he hated her then they’d at least be equals, but he felt she was beneath him, so he ignored her.
“It’s a shame she’s gone, like I said, she was cute, but, I guess in a big picture kind of way, it’s probably for the best.”
***
“Who’s that, aru? Oh, that bitchy little fish girl? I didn’t know her all that well. Only ever talked to her once, if that.
“That interaction was more of her randomly showing up out of nowhere and cursing me out for no reason. I told you, I didn’t even know who she was, and would have continued my existence not knowing happily, aru.
“I don’t recall what she wanted from me in the first place. I remember I was apparently ‘getting in the way of true love,’ at one point in her rant. Eventually she did go on about how I ‘thought I was better than her, but clearly my crazy Eastern ways were backwards,’ and how ‘she was the only one who knew what real culture was,’ aru. No I’m paraphrasing actually, she said ‘like’ a lot for some reason, aru.
“I did suggest we become trading partners, now that I knew she existed, while she was visiting, but she just slapped me. It didn’t have much power behind it, so I knew she would never be a real threat to me, but still, you don’t go around slapping other nations like that, aru.
“Honestly, whether she’s here or not, I don’t care. My existence will continue on as always, aru.”
***
“See?” the green fairy said, holding up his notes, “That’s everyone who matters. I told you it would be fine if one little nation sunk to the bottom of the sea one measly time.”
“You didn’t sink it once, YOU SANK IT NINE TIMES!” the larger fairy bellowed.
“Maybe so…but in the end, the number of times doesn’t matter either…does it?”
“I suppose not,” He sighed, “Alright, a deal’s a deal; you can still be a fairy.”
“Woohoo! Look out world! Cosmo’s back!”
“Look out indeed…”
Meanwhile, somewhere at the bottom of the ocean…
“Like no fair guys! Like, why won’t someone like, save me! It’s like, dark and like, scary and there’s like, fish down here! Like so uncool, this is like Egypt’s fault! She could like, never understand the like perfection of my like utopia! Or like, that China bastard, he’s like always been like vying for my like spot, or like maybe like Germania, he’s like always been like jealous…always like trying to keep me from Rome.
“Rome…wait for me Rome, my love! I’ll be back for you soon!”
A/N: It goes Mama Egypt, Mama Greece, Germania, Rome, China, if I didn't make that clear. And god damnit, now I want to write a sequal where Atlantis comes back, finds Rome dead, and falls in love with Italy. Bad plot bunnies, I don't have time for that!
Reply
this is great!! haha made my day (night) plus i guessed 4 out of the 5 correct to!!
I love the idea of cosmo interviewing the nations so that he can prove no one cared about atlantis XD it would be really funny to see her try to release a kraken(sp?) on germany cause he spends to much time with italy lol i love your fills so much!!!!
Reply
Also, why I'm feeling that the only reason Cosmo got away with this was that Fairy World-tan neither could stand the parody Sue incredibly arrogant little fish nation.
(recaptcha: powers argues. no, reCaptcha, they are kning of agreeing in the same issue)
Reply
This is AMAZING, just everything about it!
Reply
[/shot]
That was awesome. Just awesome.
Reply
***
“Live! From Timmy’s tree house…it’s, the Timmy Turner Show! Join Timmy and his special guests as he tries to complete the big history report he blew off. And now, heeere’s Timmy!”
“Thank you, thank you. Hey, we have a great show for you tonight. Here to help me with my report are three of the founder fathers themselves…”
Meanwhile, in 1776…
“Hey, Washington,” America said as he approached the man who was currently chopping up a wooden table in the far corner of Independence Hall, “I know you’re all about to sign the Declaration in a bit, but I was wondering if I could talk to you…”
“Hm? Of course Alfred. I’ll always have time for you.” And with that he vanished.
America gave himself five seconds to let it sink in before panicking and running off to find Franklin.
“Beeeeeeeen!!!” He shouted as he screeched to a halt in front of him. “Washington mysteriously disappeared mysteriously!”
“That’s odd. I was just-” and then he vanished too.
“J-Jefferson!!”
“What are you shouting about now, Alfred?”
“Washington and Franklin just-” but before he could finish that thought, Jefferson was gone as well.
“Why me, why today?!?! This is England’s fault…somehow.”
Meanwhile, in the present…
“You guys can’t just run away like that,” Timmy said as he got his guests seated once more, “If you get lost that could really mess things up, but more importantly I’ll never get my report done!”
“Sorry…” the three founders said in unison as they took their respective seats and Franklin got struck by lightning.
“Timmy!” Cosmo shouted as he flew in from the window, “Air Force Zero is coming in fast!”
“Air Force Zero?! Wait, I thought that was for the president!”
“That’s Air Force One, sweetie.” Wanda corrected.
“Then who’s in Air Force Zero?”
That question was answered five seconds later when a muscular blond man came crashing through the window.
“HAHAHAHA!” He laughed loudly as he stood up, seemingly unharmed with his trip through the quadruple-pain glass. “Not to worry, the HERO has arrived!”
“Who…?” Timmy started to ask, but was interrupted by a cry of “Alfred!” from the men on the couch.
“You can’t just crash through windows like that!” Franklin exclaimed.
“You need to use your head boy,” Jefferson fussed as he brushed stray glass from the man’s hair.
“What if you had gotten hurt?” Washington added.
“But guuys, I’m fiine…” the man whined.
“Would someone explain to me what the heck’s going on?!” Timmy shouted.
The founders blanched, blushed, and stood around awkwardly for a bit before Washington caught sight of a wooden post off to the side and ran over to chop it.
“You might want to stop him…” the man said.
“I’ll go get him.” Wanda poofed off after him.
“Who are you? How do you know them? Why are you here? Answer my questions, or I’ll…do something…”
“Alfred F. Jones, I’m with the government. Long story. I sensed a…disturbance and came to investigate, and may I ask, what the heck are you doing with my founding fathers in a tree house talk show studio thing?”
“Uh…well, wait a minute, your founders?”
“Well you see lad,” Franklin explained, “Alfred is sort of the personification of America.”
“What? Is that possible?”
“I’m standing here, aren’t I? Now why are they here, and not signing my Declaration of Independence?!”
“Relax Al,” Jefferson said, scribbling something on his parchment, “Timmy here is trying to do a history report and asked us to help. We’ll go right back when we’re done.”
“…is that safe?”
“Yeah sure why not?” Timmy offered.
“Well, okay, I’ll allow it, but I need to stay right here to make sure you put them back when you’re done.”
“When did you become all grown-up?” Washington commented when Wanda dragged him back. Alfred shrugged.
“It must be the new bifocals,” Franklin added, “they are quite nice…where did you get them lad?”
“Oh, I got them from Mexico in 1845. It was pretty sweet.”
“Okay, this whole catching up thing is great and all, but I’ve still got a report to do, so focus back here, ‘kay?” Timmy said as he sat behind his desk. Alfred found a seat in the audience and the Founders sat back on the couch.
Reply
“Timmy, we need to take a break,” Wanda nagged. “We need to get these guys back to their time period; they’ve been here too long all ready!”
“Relax Wanda. Besides, I think if history had changed, we’d have noticed now, right?”
As if on cue, everything started changing, and everyone left the safety of the tree house to investigate. Electricity vanished and everything became more, well…
“You bloody wanker!” A now specs-less Alfred charged, grabbed Timmy by the shirt and started shaking him, “I ought to sock you one for this, git!”
“I say, don’t get your knickers in a twist now, old bean!” Timmy said, grappling against Alfred’s strength. He let him drop to the ground.
“Oh, piss off!” Everything became more British.
“What’s going on?” Jefferson asked as he and the rest of the founders wandered over.
“Because you guys have been gone to long, America is still a British Colony, and deprived of electricity.” Timmy explained.
“Don’t forget about taxation without representation!” Washington added.
“Huh?”
“’Ello ‘ello! Tax man here!” A random guy said, snatching Cosmo and Wanda’s wands right out of their hands. “Wand tax.” He explained, tipping his hat and leaving as suddenly as he’d shown up.
“I bloody hate taxation without representation…” Alfred lamented. “And core blimey I miss Texas. I can’t see a thing!”
“Whine whine whine,” Timmy taunted, “why don’t you do something about it!”
“You git!” He lunged forward and started strangling the boy. “This is your bleeding fault!”
Jefferson and Washington managed to pull the nation off before he did lasting damage.
“You better have a way to fix this…”
“Ooh! I know!” Cosmo flew back up to the tree house and came back down, riding on a scooter. “We can take everyone back on the Time Scooter!”
“That’s a great idea Cosmo…that was weird.”
“Almost as weird as me speaking British.” As everyone else scrambled on the scooter, Alfred jotted something down on a piece of paper and handed it to Timmy. “Give this to Colonial me, and no bloody peaking! I think you’ve messed up enough already, savvy?”
He nodded and stuffed it in his pocket before starting the scooter and blasting off into the past.
Meanwhile, in 1776…
“AAAAARGH!!!”
“Calm down Alfred! Just because three of the most important people in this revolution mysteriously vanished at the same time to god knows where doesn’t mean you’ll be stuck as a Colony for life!”
“Yeah, England could decide he’d rather just kill you for defying him…”
“Now that I think about it, we’ll all be hung for treason as well…”
“Not helping guys!” Alfred snapped. He spotted Benedict Arnold off in a corner all by himself, plotting and decided to ask him if he’d had any progress.
“Hey Benny! Any luck on finding the others?”
“Gah! Um, no, not yet…I’m not plotting betrayal or anything…and it’s Benedict. Benedict Arnold.”
“Whatever Benny…” he sighed and turned around to walk away, but remembered something else he wanted to ask, and turned back to find George Washington in his place instead.
“Georgie! There you are!” Alfred grabbed the man into a tight bear hug. “You had me worried! Where are Jefferson and Franklin?”
“Can’t…breathe…” the nation let him go. “There, um, around…somewhere. Check over there while I go talk to Hancock…”
“Wait a second, something seems off…are you sure you’re Washington?”
“Of course I am! Can’t you tell by my white hair, wooden teeth, and love of all things free?”
“Well, good enough for me!” He followed him over to where Hancock was busy signing stuff.
“Hey Hancock, you mind signing this Declaration of Surrenderpendence for me, your friend, George Washington?”
“Sure-wait, isn’t that bad?”
“What?! You’re giving up!?”
“Yes Alfred. I’m sorry, but I just don’t think you have what it takes to beat England. It’s best if we give up now.”
Tears started to form in the young nation’s eyes as Washington coerced Hancock into signing his document, when all of a sudden a blinding flash of light appeared in the middle of the room, revealing the missing founders and some kid on some wheeled contraption of some kind.
Washington jumped up and shot his teeth out, hitting Hancock’s hand and preventing the demise of America before he even had a chance to begin.
Reply
“Oh no you didn’t…” the two Washingtons prepared for what would probably have been an epic fistfight if Alfred hadn’t interrupted by hugging the new Washington.
“I knew it! I knew he was a fake! Don’t you ever leave me again ever! None of you!” He shot a look at the other two over Washington’s shoulder.
“Can’t…breathe…”
“Sorry!”
Jefferson had, meanwhile, unmasked the villain to be none other than Benedict Arnold.
“And I would have gotten away with it to, if it weren’t for that-”
“Yeah yeah, we’ve heard it all before,” Timmy waved him off. “Well, all you have to do now is sign the Declaration of Independence and we’ll be on our way.”
“We can’t!” Hancock said, “Washington’s wooden teeth and love of all things free broke my hand! Now we’re one signature short!”
“Dude there’s like, twenty other people in the room. Can’t they sign it?”
“Oh yeah…” he wandered off to find another signature.
“Oh! I almost forgot, Alfred,” the nation turned and Timmy handed him the piece of paper. “What is it? Finical tips for when you get the stock market started? Secret British military plans for an easy victory? The suspense is killing me!”
Alfred read the note and whacked Timmy upside the head.
“Ouch! That hurt! What was that for?!”
“Sorry, but the note said it was all your fault and that I should whack you upside the head,” he handed Timmy the note so he could read if for himself. “I don’t know who this Usa is, but the handwriting’s similar to mine, so I trust him. Or her. Or it.”
“Figures…” Timmy started up the Time Scooter and he and his fairies went back home.
Meanwhile, in class the next day…
“You know Turner, most teachers would find this style of delivering a report creative and deserving of reward,” Mr. Crocker said, scribbling Timmy’s grade down. “I however am not one of them. You fail!”
Timmy sighed dejectedly at his grade when the sound of a plane swooping low was heard throughout the classroom.
“It’s Air Force Zero!” one of the children exclaimed when they ran over to the window.
“Oh no…”
Sure enough, five seconds later Alfred Jones came crashing through the window.
“HAHAHA!” He laughed after standing up and brushing the glass off.
“You! Who are you? And you better be paying for those windows!” Crocker shouted.
“Sorry sorry, put it on my tab. I’m Alfred F. Jones and I’m with the Department of Education. I have it under good authority that you just failed one Timmy Turner, correct?”
“Yes, but I don’t see how that’s-”
“Well, the higher-ups want me to come and make that an A. Since there government bigwigs, you understand, right?”
“You can’t just-”
“Sure I can!” He grabbed the F and pulled out a giant stamp that changed it to an A. “See? Just did.” Alfred handed the paper back to Timmy. “Let’s just say we’re even now, git.”
“Fine by me.”
Reply
(and this was on of my fav eps as well haha must... chop... wood!!!!)
These are getting more hilarious by every sentence anon i love it so much.
Reply
(By the way, now we need Hetalia fan art in FOP style. Because, really)
*hugs Author!Anon and feeds with their favourite foods*
The recaptcha says "has nobles". This recaptcha is very smart indeed.
Reply
Leave a comment