Somehow This is Better (.5/?)
anonymous
October 9 2009, 17:00:10 UTC
This part is a little short-ish, since I'm at work and just wanted to get a start on it while it was in my head. No specific timelines, really. _________________________________________________
Arthur sighed as he sank into the chair of his hotel room, rubbing his temples. Once again, he had tried to confess to Alfred how he felt about him, and once again, Alfred's ADHD (Arthur was convinced he had it) kicked in and ruined things. How long had he been trying to do this now? Since the Revolution? No...before that. If he had only told him then, maybe he wouldn't have left him. Now, he was always left chasing his shadow - starting ridiculous arguments just to keep his attention, to take hold of his reins and stop him, to spend time with him.
It wasn't quality time, though. How could it be, arguing and insulting each other as they did. The same tired arguments over the same tired subjects. His cooking, Alfred's stupid (and they WERE stupid, at least that wasn't a lie) ideas...he could recite an argument line for line in his head before it even started.
But something seemed different today, though he couldn't quite put his finger on it at the time. He supposed now would be a good time, as he got up and walked over to the water heater to make some tea, to try to figure out what it was.
_____________________________
Note: Way to short, sorry! There will be more, definitely later today, but my boss came back from lunch with "must be done yesterday but I forgot to give it to you" work, so...I can't finish this part
recaptcha says feigns impatiently, and it's so appropriate...
Somehow This is Better (1/?)
anonymous
October 9 2009, 23:13:02 UTC
"Alfred, do you have a minute?" The young nation looked over, steering to the side to let others through the door he no longer was. "Sure thing, Iggy. What's up?" The older nation's eye ticked as he let the irritating nickname slide. All relationships would fail if little pet peeves got in the way, after all. "I wanted to congratulate you. For once, your ideas weren't completely asinine." A heavy hand clapped on his shoulder. Didn't the boy know his own monstrous strength? How many tables had he broken this year alone? "Ha! Of course it was great! A hero can't save people with bad ideas! That's why I always work hard to come up with the best ones!" Arthur imagined that meant he spent more than the usual 2 seconds thinking of it. "Right... Anyway, that's not the only reason I wanted to talk to you..." He looked down at his hands, hoping the blush on his cheeks wasn't as obvious as it felt. "...I know you also reminded everyone that your birthday is coming up and I was hoping that maybe this year, you and I could-" He was startled as the hand that was on his shoulder moved and forcefully slapped his back as Alfred started laughing. "Aw, you wanna come to the party? Me and Mattie are having this huge weekend-long bash since our birthdays are so close and, we were thinking we should invite everyone, but Mattie wasn't sure anyone else would actually want to go! I'll go tell him that you brought it up, that will make him feel a lot better!" Arthur scowled, there he went, off on his tangents about the wrong thing, again! "No, you ridiculous sod! Why must you always interrupt people and come up such foolishness! Did someone drop you on your head as a child?!" There was something different in Alfred's eyes for a moment before he grinned cheekily, as he always did when Arthur insulted him. “Well, if that’s the case, who could have done it? Perhaps…you? You were the one that raised me after all, Iggy.”
Arthur frowned as he sat down, letting his tea brew as he looked out the window at the city lights below. That was when it seemed like something was different, but the rest of the argument was as per normal, the same script, same actions. What was in his eyes at that moment?
That's the rest of chapter one, finally! I guess I set this before July 1. July 1 is Canada Day and July 4 is Independence Day. There are some towns on the borders between the two countries that just have a grand ole time getting drunk and celebrating together.
Somehow This is Better (2/?)
anonymous
October 10 2009, 06:12:23 UTC
"Alfred, do you have a minute?" He looked over as he started moving out of the way of the door, recognizing the voice.
"Sure thing, Iggy. What's up?" The older nation's eye ticked and Alfred tried not to sigh. If that didn't set him off, it could only mean one thing. He was going to try again.
"I wanted to congratulate you. For once, your ideas weren't completely asinine." Hey! He had awesome ideas! Everyone was just to closed minded to truly understand their finer complexities. It's not like giant robots build and operate themselves! They need educated minds to put them together and design the programs that would make it sew up the whole in the ozone layer. Oh right...it was time to start what he referred to as "the game." He clapped his hand down on the older nation's shoulder, perhaps with too much feigned enthusiasm this time, as he noticed the older nation buckle slightly as he did.
"Ha! Of course it was great! A hero can't save people with bad ideas! That's why I always work hard to come up with the best ones!" In fact, he spent the past month thinking of this and how it could work when his last idea had been shot down at the last meeting.
"Right... Anyway, that's not the only reason I wanted to talk to you..." He looked down at his hands, hardly hiding the blush that had spread to his whole person. Alfred knew it would come to this eventually. He glanced around while Arthur wasn't looking, there were still a few people in the room. As his eyes fell on a figure in the corner, Arthur continued.
"...I know you also reminded everyone that your birthday is coming up and I was hoping that maybe this year, you and I could-" There it was! He was getting right to business this time...he must be getting more desperate. Birthday, he must want dinner...oh...Alfred thought quickly and moved his hand off Arthur's shoulder, giving his back a good, over-forced whack on the back.
"Aw, you wanna come to the party? Me and Mattie are having this huge weekend-long bash since our birthdays are so close and, we were thinking we should invite everyone, but Mattie wasn't sure anyone else would actually want to go! I'll go tell him that you brought it up, that will make him feel a lot better!" Sorry Mattie, hope you didn't already make plans with someone, but I can't do this...not when I know what he wants.
"No, you ridiculous sod! Why must you always interrupt people and come up such foolishness! Did someone drop you on your head as a child?!"
At that moment, Ivan walked past the two, glancing over briefly before heading out. He looked at him! Feeling his knees start to loosen up more than they should he looked back at Arthur and grinned. At least they had gotten past the awkward part of the conversation. The arguing was second nature to him now. He didn't even have to pay attention to it, it was scripted.
“Well, if that’s the case, who could have done it? Perhaps…you? You were the one that raised me after all, Iggy.”
Alfred sighed, dropping the unfinished burger in the garbage as he moved over to his bed. How long had this charade been going on now? He stopped counting after two hundred. Most nations probably would have turned him down and moved on with their lives, but...he just couldn't do that to Arthur. Sure, he was a little too stiff and somewhat obnoxious about it, his food could easily pass as a WMD, and he had those invisible fairy friends, but Arthur was the one that found him, raised him, introduced him to everyone...to him. He couldn't just take everything Arthur had done for him and throw it in his face. Not again. The Revolution had been so hard on him. How could he do that to him again?
He pulled one of the pillows over his head, ignoring how it pushed Texas into his face. He didn't want to turn him down, but he didn't return his feelings at all. So instead, he pretended they weren't there, just like his own feelings. He would figure it out eventually, wouldn't he?
If only he hadn't been telling himself that for more than 2 centuries.
Somehow This is Better (6/?)
anonymous
October 13 2009, 16:43:40 UTC
Alfred watched his brother pace in front of his couch, blocking his view of the TV. “I already apologized for not telling you before, but I told you! I just thought of it the day before!” Matthew brought a hand to his forehead, massaging his temples.
“But now I’m going to be expected to be there, and everyone is coming, and I was supposed to be in Ottawa! How do you even come up with something like that?” Alfred threw up his hands.
“I panicked! Arthur was about to say that he wanted to do something with just the two of us and I needed something to be doing already!” Oh did he say all that outloud? Judging from the look Matthew was giving him, he must have.
“…Wouldn’t you want to just spend it alone with him?”
Alfred blinked a few times, giving him a blank stare. “What?”
Matthew fidgeted a bit. “Well, aren’t you, you know…a couple? I mean, you guys hang out all the time, and you bicker like a married couple and…” He trailed off as Alfred sighed and bent over his knees, holding his head in his hands.
“We’re not a couple! I don’t like him that way.” Matthew blinked and sat down beside him, with his hands in his lap. Was it that obvious that a pent up rant was coming? “I just don’t know what to do! He’s a great friend, but I can’t see him as anything other than a much older brother! I mean, he raised me, taught me everything, made toys for me, cooked for me, and what did I do to thank him? I declared my independence and turned a gun on him. ‘I’m not your younger brother.’ I told him. I just wanted to be free to make my own decisions, stand on my own two feet. But I am…I mean, I feel like his younger brother. We can have that kind of relationship without being under his control. You do it! And look at you and me!” Matthew seemed like he was biting back a comment (probably something snarky about how both of his analogies weren’t entirely accurate), so he took the silence as an indication to continue. Man, Matthew was a great listener! “He looked so small, you know? So…broken. It was necessary for me to become, well…me, but I felt terrible. I swore then that I would never hurt him like that again.” He held up his hand as Matthew opened his mouth. “The War of 1812 doesn’t count. It had nothing to do with wanting to hurt him. It was purely expansion!” When Matthew sat back, clearly not convinced, he continued. “And then I realized, he treated me differently from everyone else. I’m really not as dumb as everyone thinks I am. You know that. It was obvious he wanted a different kind of relationship than I did. But, I can’t bear to break his heart, so I just…avoid it instead. Pretend I’m oblivious to everything, and I can be oblivious to his feelings too. It’s just…better this way.”
Matthew looked at him for a while after he finished, thinking carefully before he spoke. “How can it be better when it’s hurting you both?”
Somehow This is Better (3/?)
anonymous
October 12 2009, 06:19:17 UTC
The next morning, Arthur found himself in the meeting room to prepare for his speech that day. He was finishing his drawings on the boards when someone from the hotel staff pushed in a cart, and began replacing the flowers in the vases from a day before. Arthur watched silently with a raised brow. It was something he never quite understood about Alfred. Other nations would always adorn the room with subtle symbols of their own when a meeting was held in their country. Perhaps the room would have furniture with fabrics in the nation’s colors. Paintings from famous artists would be on the walls. Music from the country’s great composers would softly play in the background. National flowers would fill the vases. But Alfred…he never adorned the room with the roses that he so cherished.
Arthur always assumed that naming roses as his national flower was a subtle hint to him that Alfred returned his feelings, even if he acted oblivious. After all, they were his own national flower. Alfred even memorialized the famous War of the Roses in one his states. While taking him on a tour of Pennsylvania years earlier, he had shown him the walls in York and Lancaster, with the white and roses painted on them. Arthur had thought that it would be a great chance to finally reveal his feelings, but before he could start, Alfred had already went on a tangent about how they should go over to Gettysburg; he knew some really scary ghost stories. But now, as he watched the staff member changing the flowers, just because the petals from yesterday’s batch may have wilted slightly, he couldn’t help but notice that this time, like every other time, they were sunflowers. Large, bright and warm, like the star they seemed to represent, they certainly lit up the room. But amongst the paintings of Georgia O’Keefe and John Trumbell, and the gentle hum of music from John Knowles Paine and George Gershwin in the background, it always seemed out of place. “But sunflowers are the state flower of Kansas, Iggy! That’s like…the heart of the heartland! Of course I’d have sunflowers!”
He didn’t realize how long he had stared at the flowers, lost in thought, until the other nations were drifting in wearily, complaining about the Starbuck’s coffees in their hands - overpriced and tasteless, just like America. He didn’t point out that they were the ones who always bought it, when there were plenty of other bistros and cafes in the area, Alfred would cheerfully remind them of it himself, ignoring the glares and eye rolls as he always did. Speak of the devil, he felt a hand cheerfully slap his back with a laugh, announcing his arrival. “Morning Iggy!” Before he could give any kind of reply, the young nation was on the other side of the room, greeting a cranky Yao and half listening to insults about his coffee from Francis.When Alfred looked over and smiled, he just smiled back, never noticing as Ivan took one of the sunflowers from the table behind him and slipped it in his coat. *****************
Just some quick notes: 1. The rose is the national flower of England, and on October 7, 1986, United States Code Title 36 Section 187 designated the rose as the US's national flower, accompanied by Proclamation 5574, detailing the nation's history with the flower. 2. The War of the Roses was a series of civil wars between the houses of York and Lancaster for the throne of England between 1453 and 1487. The Alba was the White Rose of the House of York, and the Gallica was the Red Rose of the House of Lancaster. 3. Blue roses do not occur in nature. The blue roses that have been genetically bred, such as the "Blue Moon" tend to be violet in nature. Blue roses are often created by dying the petals of white roses. 4. Georgia O'Keefe was a famous American painter who lived from 1886 to 1986. Her fame peaked in the 1920's. John Trumbell lived from 1756 to 1843, and is most famously known for his painting Declaration of Independence which is featured on the back of the 2-dollar bill. 5.
Re: Somehow This is Better (3/?)
anonymous
October 12 2009, 21:13:04 UTC
Wow, this just keeps getting better and better. England's whole monologue based around the flowers is just so interesting and I'm really looking forward to more!
author!non
anonymous
October 12 2009, 21:29:09 UTC
Thanks. ^_^ This is my first time writing anything for Hetalia, so I feel like I'm grasping at straws most of the time. I really used this more as filler to show how England is interpreting things, and also to give a backdrop of how things really are.
I haven't decided yet whether England will realize on his own, or have someone just point it out. Probably a mix, but either way, it will kind of come back to this.
Mostly, I just love the kind of symbolism you can use with flowers.
Somehow This is Better (4/?)
anonymous
October 12 2009, 21:24:44 UTC
"And finally, the most important piece of business today!" Arthur blinked and looked up as he gathered up his papers. I thought we finished the day's agenda already. "Next week it's my birthday!...oh, and Mattie's, too." Oh. "So we are going to be having a huge party with beer and burgers and of course, fireworks!" Arthur glanced around as the other nations began to murmur amongst themselves while Alfred continued on with the details. (Who is Mattie? Why is he so obsessed with his birthday? There will be more than just burgers, won't there? Ve~ How fun! I hope he'll have pasta! We better go, you know how his temper is. Oh, I know, I'd hate to be give him a reason to invade someone else. Always has to be the center of attention...) Arthur frowned slightly as he listened. Sure, Alfred was pig headed and brash, didn't think before he spoke, and more often than not stepped on the toes of other nations and unwittingly offended them, but he had a good heart and really just wanted everyone to be happy. He looked back at Alfred, who was smiling happily as he prattled on about how awesome it would be. It was painful for him, almost personally. He loved Alfred, and to hear all this, when he was so blissfully oblivious to the truth...it made Arthur hurt for him, since no one else would. He sighed as Alfred finished and seemed to be waiting for some kind of a reply, from anyone. "Well, I'll go, but I don't plan on eating any of your dreadful burgers. I like my arteries, thank you." Of course I'll go; I'd go anywhere you asked me too, even if it is to celebrate that day. "Well that's just fine! Just don't bring any of those disgusting scones with you! I want people to enjoy themselves, not wait on line for the toilet all night!" Among the ensuing uproar, no one heard a forgotten nation's protests (How come he never heard about this? He had plans!)
Somehow This is Better (5/?)
anonymous
October 12 2009, 22:03:04 UTC
Francis sighed as he followed Arthur through the store. “Why is it that I have to be here again?” They had been there for an hour now, and nothing was ‘just right.’ “If you want to get him a present, that is fine, but I will do no such thing. I have given him his beloved Liberté Éclairant le Monde already. It is enough that I am going to his and dear Mathieu’s party. If they need more, I shall gladly give them the gift of my-“ Arthur cut him off with a hand over his mouth before he could continue.
“The Statue of Liberty doesn’t count! That was two hundred years ago, you twit! Besides, even if you don’t want to get anything…” He sighed, he didn’t want to have to do this, but…”I need your help. You are better with…romance…than I am.” Francis regarded him for a moment before shaking his head with a click of his tongue.
“Mon cher, why is it that you do this to yourself? Surely after all this time, you’ve noticed he’s just not that into you, non?”
Arthur scowled at this. “That’s not true! He’s just oblivious!”
“Arthur, you know Alfred better than any of us. If he returned your feelings, everyone would have known about it long ago, and you’d come to the meetings unable to walk straight.” He certainly was prone to letting everyone know his thoughts and feelings about everything. But why wouldn’t he…oh that wine freak!
“Relationships and everything else are completely different! Especially after the Revolution! He’s so proud of being an independent nation that he doesn’t want to admit he misses being with me!”
Francis looked at him with something that he imagined was akin to pity. “And so, you think that if you tell him how you feel, he will feel free to return your feelings.” He turned to look at a display with a thoughtful expression on his face. “And, what if he did not return your feelings. What would you do then? You have been after him for so long. How would you feel?” What was he getting at?
“What kind of question is that? Of course I’d be upset - anyone would! I’ve put so much time and effort into our relationship, even after he betrayed me! It’d be like…like he did it again!”
Francis nodded. “Well, wouldn’t that be a reason not to say anything? …If you really must get him something, why not make it yourself? Those wooden soldiers you made him were always his favorite growing up, non?” With that he left, and Arthur stood watching him go, more confused than ever. *********************************
Quick Notes: 1. The Statue of Liberty was given to the US by France on October 26, 1886 (and it makes this anon cry to know so many of her fellow citizens do not know this, oh France! I still luv you!) and was originally called La Liberté Éclairant le Monde, or Liberty Enlightening the World. It was to commemorate their friendship between the two countries formed during the American Revolution. It's been a rough ride, but we're getting by.
Somehow This is Better (6/?) (whoops)
anonymous
October 13 2009, 16:45:19 UTC
Alfred watched his brother pace in front of his couch, blocking his view of the TV. “I already apologized for not telling you before, but I told you! I just thought of it the day before!” Matthew brought a hand to his forehead, massaging his temples.
“But now I’m going to be expected to be there, and everyone is coming, and I was supposed to be in Ottawa! How do you even come up with something like that?” Alfred threw up his hands.
“I panicked! Arthur was about to say that he wanted to do something with just the two of us and I needed something to be doing already!” Oh did he say all that outloud? Judging from the look Matthew was giving him, he must have.
“…Wouldn’t you want to just spend it alone with him?”
Alfred blinked a few times, giving him a blank stare. “What?”
Matthew fidgeted a bit. “Well, aren’t you, you know…a couple? I mean, you guys hang out all the time, and you bicker like a married couple and…” He trailed off as Alfred sighed and bent over his knees, holding his head in his hands.
“We’re not a couple! I don’t like him that way.” Matthew blinked and sat down beside him, with his hands in his lap. Was it that obvious that a pent up rant was coming? “I just don’t know what to do! He’s a great friend, but I can’t see him as anything other than a much older brother! I mean, he raised me, taught me everything, made toys for me, cooked for me, and what did I do to thank him? I declared my independence and turned a gun on him. ‘I’m not your younger brother.’ I told him. I just wanted to be free to make my own decisions, stand on my own two feet. But I am…I mean, I feel like his younger brother. We can have that kind of relationship without being under his control. You do it! And look at you and me!” Matthew seemed like he was biting back a comment (probably something snarky about how both of his analogies weren’t entirely accurate), so he took the silence as an indication to continue. Man, Matthew was a great listener! “He looked so small, you know? So…broken. It was necessary for me to become, well…me, but I felt terrible. I swore then that I would never hurt him like that again.” He held up his hand as Matthew opened his mouth. “The War of 1812 doesn’t count. It had nothing to do with wanting to hurt him. It was purely expansion!” When Matthew sat back, clearly not convinced, he continued. “And then I realized, he treated me differently from everyone else. I’m really not as dumb as everyone thinks I am. You know that. It was obvious he wanted a different kind of relationship than I did. But, I can’t bear to break his heart, so I just…avoid it instead. Pretend I’m oblivious to everything, and I can be oblivious to his feelings too. It’s just…better this way.”
Matthew looked at him for a while after he finished, thinking carefully before he spoke. “How can it be better when it’s hurting you both?”
Re: Somehow This is Better (6/?) (whoops)
anonymous
October 15 2009, 19:06:35 UTC
I love this. Just the way you write Arthur and Alfred and their sides blows me away. I can't decide who I sympathize with more.
You make me very curious to what the others know; France seemingly knowing, Canada thinking they were a couple, and especially with Russia and the flowers. What does Ivan know/notice?
I love the flower use and what America decorates the meeting rooms with. Go O'keefe and Gershwin! (And the comment about Starbucks vs. non-chain cafes is so win; I have friends that do the go to Starbucks all the time and then complain about it.)
Wow, thanks. I apologize that I haven't posted in a while. I'm trying to finish up another story that I started a day or two after this one. But since I have a definite end in sight for that one, I can get the crack out of my system and give this the serious attention it deserves.
And thanks for noticing that everyone knows different things. One of the first things we learned in law school, and had hammered into our heads through the three year span, was that no one ever sees the same thing. You can have five eyewitnesses that all watched the same event from the same point in time to the same end, and get 5 different testimonies. It's because all people will pick one focal point and that will guide what they see and how they interpret it. That's why when you force someone to change their focal point, they remember things they may not have realized they noticed before.
As for what Ivan knows? Well, right now, only he knows. ;) But his POV will be coming up soon.
I was originally going to go for bittersweet, but that was when I was going to do this as a two part story (Arthur POV then Alfred POV). THAT changed really quickly, obviously.
And I love all the symbolism you can get in flowers, depending on what your topic is.
(My thoughts exactly. It's always like, then why do you drink it every. single. time?)
Somehow This is Better (7/?)
anonymous
October 18 2009, 06:48:14 UTC
Francis frowned slightly as he watched Alfred and Arthur talking. It was more forced and awkward than usual, though to the untrained eye they were the same as ever. He looked over at Matthew, who was standing beside him, watching the same scene. “You’re not the only one who thought they were a couple, Matthieu. Do not feel embarrassed.”
Matthew sighed as he watched. “It’s just so obvious now that I know what to look for. I can’t believe I didn’t see it before! You’d think I know my own brother enough to notice when everything he’s doing is so obviously practiced and kinda robotic. He just knows how to respond automatically, like he’s following some kind of unwritten script.”
Francis nodded. “Just because somebody doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.” He didn’t have to see him to know that Matthew was giving him a strange look.
“Alfred loves Arthur. We both know that much is true. It’s just not the way Arthur wants. Even if Alfred wanted to pretend to make someone he loves so much happy, it would be empty and hollow; a mockery of love, non? His body would be with Arthur, but not his heart. You cannot give to someone what you have already given to another.” He watched as Arthur held out a wrapped box to Alfred, who laughed as he took it, wasn’t he too old for presents?
Matthew, on the other hand, would have choked had he taken a sip of his drink at that moment. “He what? Everything he said to me the other night, and there wasn’t even the slightest hint that he was seeing someone else.” He began looking around at the partygoers, wondering if that person was there now.
Francis nodded as he watched the scene playing out before them. He really had to admire Arthur’s handiwork. After all these years, he hadn’t lost his touch. Alfred set the box aside and gave Arthur a stiff hug in thanks, which Arthur relaxed into. Over Arthur’s shoulder, Alfred’s eyes seemed to meet with someone’s and he smiled before turning his attention back to the older nation. “He’s not seeing anyone. And to tell would be to acknowledge it. It would make his dance with Arthur quite difficult, non?”
Matthew frowned. “I just don’t see why he can’t just turn him down. He knows he has to. He said he didn’t want to hurt him again.”
Francis nodded. “Fear is the great motivator, and the great hindrance. Arthur is too afraid to confess what he feels and Alfred too afraid to turn him down. But they are different today. Both have realized what they must do, and both must work up the nerve to do it. And all we can do is wait.”
He turned to Matthew and smiled. “So why don’t we go find something fun to Matthieu. Perhaps a special birthday celebration just for you?”
No specific timelines, really.
_________________________________________________
Arthur sighed as he sank into the chair of his hotel room, rubbing his temples. Once again, he had tried to confess to Alfred how he felt about him, and once again, Alfred's ADHD (Arthur was convinced he had it) kicked in and ruined things. How long had he been trying to do this now? Since the Revolution? No...before that. If he had only told him then, maybe he wouldn't have left him. Now, he was always left chasing his shadow - starting ridiculous arguments just to keep his attention, to take hold of his reins and stop him, to spend time with him.
It wasn't quality time, though. How could it be, arguing and insulting each other as they did. The same tired arguments over the same tired subjects. His cooking, Alfred's stupid (and they WERE stupid, at least that wasn't a lie) ideas...he could recite an argument line for line in his head before it even started.
But something seemed different today, though he couldn't quite put his finger on it at the time. He supposed now would be a good time, as he got up and walked over to the water heater to make some tea, to try to figure out what it was.
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Note: Way to short, sorry! There will be more, definitely later today, but my boss came back from lunch with "must be done yesterday but I forgot to give it to you" work, so...I can't finish this part
recaptcha says feigns impatiently, and it's so appropriate...
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"Sure thing, Iggy. What's up?" The older nation's eye ticked as he let the irritating nickname slide. All relationships would fail if little pet peeves got in the way, after all.
"I wanted to congratulate you. For once, your ideas weren't completely asinine." A heavy hand clapped on his shoulder. Didn't the boy know his own monstrous strength? How many tables had he broken this year alone?
"Ha! Of course it was great! A hero can't save people with bad ideas! That's why I always work hard to come up with the best ones!"
Arthur imagined that meant he spent more than the usual 2 seconds thinking of it. "Right... Anyway, that's not the only reason I wanted to talk to you..." He looked down at his hands, hoping the blush on his cheeks wasn't as obvious as it felt. "...I know you also reminded everyone that your birthday is coming up and I was hoping that maybe this year, you and I could-" He was startled as the hand that was on his shoulder moved and forcefully slapped his back as Alfred started laughing.
"Aw, you wanna come to the party? Me and Mattie are having this huge weekend-long bash since our birthdays are so close and, we were thinking we should invite everyone, but Mattie wasn't sure anyone else would actually want to go! I'll go tell him that you brought it up, that will make him feel a lot better!" Arthur scowled, there he went, off on his tangents about the wrong thing, again!
"No, you ridiculous sod! Why must you always interrupt people and come up such foolishness! Did someone drop you on your head as a child?!"
There was something different in Alfred's eyes for a moment before he grinned cheekily, as he always did when Arthur insulted him. “Well, if that’s the case, who could have done it? Perhaps…you? You were the one that raised me after all, Iggy.”
Arthur frowned as he sat down, letting his tea brew as he looked out the window at the city lights below. That was when it seemed like something was different, but the rest of the argument was as per normal, the same script, same actions. What was in his eyes at that moment?
That's the rest of chapter one, finally!
I guess I set this before July 1. July 1 is Canada Day and July 4 is Independence Day. There are some towns on the borders between the two countries that just have a grand ole time getting drunk and celebrating together.
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"Sure thing, Iggy. What's up?" The older nation's eye ticked and Alfred tried not to sigh. If that didn't set him off, it could only mean one thing. He was going to try again.
"I wanted to congratulate you. For once, your ideas weren't completely asinine." Hey! He had awesome ideas! Everyone was just to closed minded to truly understand their finer complexities. It's not like giant robots build and operate themselves! They need educated minds to put them together and design the programs that would make it sew up the whole in the ozone layer. Oh right...it was time to start what he referred to as "the game." He clapped his hand down on the older nation's shoulder, perhaps with too much feigned enthusiasm this time, as he noticed the older nation buckle slightly as he did.
"Ha! Of course it was great! A hero can't save people with bad ideas! That's why I always work hard to come up with the best ones!" In fact, he spent the past month thinking of this and how it could work when his last idea had been shot down at the last meeting.
"Right... Anyway, that's not the only reason I wanted to talk to you..." He looked down at his hands, hardly hiding the blush that had spread to his whole person. Alfred knew it would come to this eventually. He glanced around while Arthur wasn't looking, there were still a few people in the room. As his eyes fell on a figure in the corner, Arthur continued.
"...I know you also reminded everyone that your birthday is coming up and I was hoping that maybe this year, you and I could-" There it was! He was getting right to business this time...he must be getting more desperate. Birthday, he must want dinner...oh...Alfred thought quickly and moved his hand off Arthur's shoulder, giving his back a good, over-forced whack on the back.
"Aw, you wanna come to the party? Me and Mattie are having this huge weekend-long bash since our birthdays are so close and, we were thinking we should invite everyone, but Mattie wasn't sure anyone else would actually want to go! I'll go tell him that you brought it up, that will make him feel a lot better!" Sorry Mattie, hope you didn't already make plans with someone, but I can't do this...not when I know what he wants.
"No, you ridiculous sod! Why must you always interrupt people and come up such foolishness! Did someone drop you on your head as a child?!"
At that moment, Ivan walked past the two, glancing over briefly before heading out. He looked at him! Feeling his knees start to loosen up more than they should he looked back at Arthur and grinned. At least they had gotten past the awkward part of the conversation. The arguing was second nature to him now. He didn't even have to pay attention to it, it was scripted.
“Well, if that’s the case, who could have done it? Perhaps…you? You were the one that raised me after all, Iggy.”
Alfred sighed, dropping the unfinished burger in the garbage as he moved over to his bed. How long had this charade been going on now? He stopped counting after two hundred. Most nations probably would have turned him down and moved on with their lives, but...he just couldn't do that to Arthur. Sure, he was a little too stiff and somewhat obnoxious about it, his food could easily pass as a WMD, and he had those invisible fairy friends, but Arthur was the one that found him, raised him, introduced him to everyone...to him. He couldn't just take everything Arthur had done for him and throw it in his face. Not again. The Revolution had been so hard on him. How could he do that to him again?
He pulled one of the pillows over his head, ignoring how it pushed Texas into his face. He didn't want to turn him down, but he didn't return his feelings at all. So instead, he pretended they weren't there, just like his own feelings. He would figure it out eventually, wouldn't he?
If only he hadn't been telling himself that for more than 2 centuries.
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“But now I’m going to be expected to be there, and everyone is coming, and I was supposed to be in Ottawa! How do you even come up with something like that?” Alfred threw up his hands.
“I panicked! Arthur was about to say that he wanted to do something with just the two of us and I needed something to be doing already!” Oh did he say all that outloud? Judging from the look Matthew was giving him, he must have.
“…Wouldn’t you want to just spend it alone with him?”
Alfred blinked a few times, giving him a blank stare. “What?”
Matthew fidgeted a bit. “Well, aren’t you, you know…a couple? I mean, you guys hang out all the time, and you bicker like a married couple and…” He trailed off as Alfred sighed and bent over his knees, holding his head in his hands.
“We’re not a couple! I don’t like him that way.” Matthew blinked and sat down beside him, with his hands in his lap. Was it that obvious that a pent up rant was coming? “I just don’t know what to do! He’s a great friend, but I can’t see him as anything other than a much older brother! I mean, he raised me, taught me everything, made toys for me, cooked for me, and what did I do to thank him? I declared my independence and turned a gun on him. ‘I’m not your younger brother.’ I told him. I just wanted to be free to make my own decisions, stand on my own two feet. But I am…I mean, I feel like his younger brother. We can have that kind of relationship without being under his control. You do it! And look at you and me!” Matthew seemed like he was biting back a comment (probably something snarky about how both of his analogies weren’t entirely accurate), so he took the silence as an indication to continue. Man, Matthew was a great listener! “He looked so small, you know? So…broken. It was necessary for me to become, well…me, but I felt terrible. I swore then that I would never hurt him like that again.” He held up his hand as Matthew opened his mouth. “The War of 1812 doesn’t count. It had nothing to do with wanting to hurt him. It was purely expansion!” When Matthew sat back, clearly not convinced, he continued. “And then I realized, he treated me differently from everyone else. I’m really not as dumb as everyone thinks I am. You know that. It was obvious he wanted a different kind of relationship than I did. But, I can’t bear to break his heart, so I just…avoid it instead. Pretend I’m oblivious to everything, and I can be oblivious to his feelings too. It’s just…better this way.”
Matthew looked at him for a while after he finished, thinking carefully before he spoke. “How can it be better when it’s hurting you both?”
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Arthur always assumed that naming roses as his national flower was a subtle hint to him that Alfred returned his feelings, even if he acted oblivious. After all, they were his own national flower. Alfred even memorialized the famous War of the Roses in one his states. While taking him on a tour of Pennsylvania years earlier, he had shown him the walls in York and Lancaster, with the white and roses painted on them. Arthur had thought that it would be a great chance to finally reveal his feelings, but before he could start, Alfred had already went on a tangent about how they should go over to Gettysburg; he knew some really scary ghost stories. But now, as he watched the staff member changing the flowers, just because the petals from yesterday’s batch may have wilted slightly, he couldn’t help but notice that this time, like every other time, they were sunflowers. Large, bright and warm, like the star they seemed to represent, they certainly lit up the room. But amongst the paintings of Georgia O’Keefe and John Trumbell, and the gentle hum of music from John Knowles Paine and George Gershwin in the background, it always seemed out of place. “But sunflowers are the state flower of Kansas, Iggy! That’s like…the heart of the heartland! Of course I’d have sunflowers!”
He didn’t realize how long he had stared at the flowers, lost in thought, until the other nations were drifting in wearily, complaining about the Starbuck’s coffees in their hands - overpriced and tasteless, just like America. He didn’t point out that they were the ones who always bought it, when there were plenty of other bistros and cafes in the area, Alfred would cheerfully remind them of it himself, ignoring the glares and eye rolls as he always did. Speak of the devil, he felt a hand cheerfully slap his back with a laugh, announcing his arrival. “Morning Iggy!” Before he could give any kind of reply, the young nation was on the other side of the room, greeting a cranky Yao and half listening to insults about his coffee from Francis.When Alfred looked over and smiled, he just smiled back, never noticing as Ivan took one of the sunflowers from the table behind him and slipped it in his coat.
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Just some quick notes:
1. The rose is the national flower of England, and on October 7, 1986, United States Code Title 36 Section 187 designated the rose as the US's national flower, accompanied by Proclamation 5574, detailing the nation's history with the flower.
2. The War of the Roses was a series of civil wars between the houses of York and Lancaster for the throne of England between 1453 and 1487. The Alba was the White Rose of the House of York, and the Gallica was the Red Rose of the House of Lancaster.
3. Blue roses do not occur in nature. The blue roses that have been genetically bred, such as the "Blue Moon" tend to be violet in nature. Blue roses are often created by dying the petals of white roses.
4. Georgia O'Keefe was a famous American painter who lived from 1886 to 1986. Her fame peaked in the 1920's. John Trumbell lived from 1756 to 1843, and is most famously known for his painting Declaration of Independence which is featured on the back of the 2-dollar bill.
5.
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I haven't decided yet whether England will realize on his own, or have someone just point it out. Probably a mix, but either way, it will kind of come back to this.
Mostly, I just love the kind of symbolism you can use with flowers.
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Arthur frowned slightly as he listened. Sure, Alfred was pig headed and brash, didn't think before he spoke, and more often than not stepped on the toes of other nations and unwittingly offended them, but he had a good heart and really just wanted everyone to be happy. He looked back at Alfred, who was smiling happily as he prattled on about how awesome it would be. It was painful for him, almost personally. He loved Alfred, and to hear all this, when he was so blissfully oblivious to the truth...it made Arthur hurt for him, since no one else would. He sighed as Alfred finished and seemed to be waiting for some kind of a reply, from anyone.
"Well, I'll go, but I don't plan on eating any of your dreadful burgers. I like my arteries, thank you." Of course I'll go; I'd go anywhere you asked me too, even if it is to celebrate that day.
"Well that's just fine! Just don't bring any of those disgusting scones with you! I want people to enjoy themselves, not wait on line for the toilet all night!"
Among the ensuing uproar, no one heard a forgotten nation's protests (How come he never heard about this? He had plans!)
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“The Statue of Liberty doesn’t count! That was two hundred years ago, you twit! Besides, even if you don’t want to get anything…” He sighed, he didn’t want to have to do this, but…”I need your help. You are better with…romance…than I am.” Francis regarded him for a moment before shaking his head with a click of his tongue.
“Mon cher, why is it that you do this to yourself? Surely after all this time, you’ve noticed he’s just not that into you, non?”
Arthur scowled at this. “That’s not true! He’s just oblivious!”
“Arthur, you know Alfred better than any of us. If he returned your feelings, everyone would have known about it long ago, and you’d come to the meetings unable to walk straight.” He certainly was prone to letting everyone know his thoughts and feelings about everything. But why wouldn’t he…oh that wine freak!
“Relationships and everything else are completely different! Especially after the Revolution! He’s so proud of being an independent nation that he doesn’t want to admit he misses being with me!”
Francis looked at him with something that he imagined was akin to pity. “And so, you think that if you tell him how you feel, he will feel free to return your feelings.” He turned to look at a display with a thoughtful expression on his face. “And, what if he did not return your feelings. What would you do then? You have been after him for so long. How would you feel?” What was he getting at?
“What kind of question is that? Of course I’d be upset - anyone would! I’ve put so much time and effort into our relationship, even after he betrayed me! It’d be like…like he did it again!”
Francis nodded. “Well, wouldn’t that be a reason not to say anything? …If you really must get him something, why not make it yourself? Those wooden soldiers you made him were always his favorite growing up, non?” With that he left, and Arthur stood watching him go, more confused than ever.
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Quick Notes:
1. The Statue of Liberty was given to the US by France on October 26, 1886 (and it makes this anon cry to know so many of her fellow citizens do not know this, oh France! I still luv you!) and was originally called La Liberté Éclairant le Monde, or Liberty Enlightening the World. It was to commemorate their friendship between the two countries formed during the American Revolution. It's been a rough ride, but we're getting by.
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“But now I’m going to be expected to be there, and everyone is coming, and I was supposed to be in Ottawa! How do you even come up with something like that?” Alfred threw up his hands.
“I panicked! Arthur was about to say that he wanted to do something with just the two of us and I needed something to be doing already!” Oh did he say all that outloud? Judging from the look Matthew was giving him, he must have.
“…Wouldn’t you want to just spend it alone with him?”
Alfred blinked a few times, giving him a blank stare. “What?”
Matthew fidgeted a bit. “Well, aren’t you, you know…a couple? I mean, you guys hang out all the time, and you bicker like a married couple and…” He trailed off as Alfred sighed and bent over his knees, holding his head in his hands.
“We’re not a couple! I don’t like him that way.” Matthew blinked and sat down beside him, with his hands in his lap. Was it that obvious that a pent up rant was coming? “I just don’t know what to do! He’s a great friend, but I can’t see him as anything other than a much older brother! I mean, he raised me, taught me everything, made toys for me, cooked for me, and what did I do to thank him? I declared my independence and turned a gun on him. ‘I’m not your younger brother.’ I told him. I just wanted to be free to make my own decisions, stand on my own two feet. But I am…I mean, I feel like his younger brother. We can have that kind of relationship without being under his control. You do it! And look at you and me!” Matthew seemed like he was biting back a comment (probably something snarky about how both of his analogies weren’t entirely accurate), so he took the silence as an indication to continue. Man, Matthew was a great listener! “He looked so small, you know? So…broken. It was necessary for me to become, well…me, but I felt terrible. I swore then that I would never hurt him like that again.” He held up his hand as Matthew opened his mouth. “The War of 1812 doesn’t count. It had nothing to do with wanting to hurt him. It was purely expansion!” When Matthew sat back, clearly not convinced, he continued. “And then I realized, he treated me differently from everyone else. I’m really not as dumb as everyone thinks I am. You know that. It was obvious he wanted a different kind of relationship than I did. But, I can’t bear to break his heart, so I just…avoid it instead. Pretend I’m oblivious to everything, and I can be oblivious to his feelings too. It’s just…better this way.”
Matthew looked at him for a while after he finished, thinking carefully before he spoke. “How can it be better when it’s hurting you both?”
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I fail at posting.
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You make me very curious to what the others know; France seemingly knowing, Canada thinking they were a couple, and especially with Russia and the flowers. What does Ivan know/notice?
I love the flower use and what America decorates the meeting rooms with. Go O'keefe and Gershwin!
(And the comment about Starbucks vs. non-chain cafes is so win; I have friends that do the go to Starbucks all the time and then complain about it.)
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And thanks for noticing that everyone knows different things. One of the first things we learned in law school, and had hammered into our heads through the three year span, was that no one ever sees the same thing. You can have five eyewitnesses that all watched the same event from the same point in time to the same end, and get 5 different testimonies. It's because all people will pick one focal point and that will guide what they see and how they interpret it. That's why when you force someone to change their focal point, they remember things they may not have realized they noticed before.
As for what Ivan knows? Well, right now, only he knows. ;) But his POV will be coming up soon.
I was originally going to go for bittersweet, but that was when I was going to do this as a two part story (Arthur POV then Alfred POV). THAT changed really quickly, obviously.
And I love all the symbolism you can get in flowers, depending on what your topic is.
(My thoughts exactly. It's always like, then why do you drink it every. single. time?)
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Matthew sighed as he watched. “It’s just so obvious now that I know what to look for. I can’t believe I didn’t see it before! You’d think I know my own brother enough to notice when everything he’s doing is so obviously practiced and kinda robotic. He just knows how to respond automatically, like he’s following some kind of unwritten script.”
Francis nodded. “Just because somebody doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.” He didn’t have to see him to know that Matthew was giving him a strange look.
“Alfred loves Arthur. We both know that much is true. It’s just not the way Arthur wants. Even if Alfred wanted to pretend to make someone he loves so much happy, it would be empty and hollow; a mockery of love, non? His body would be with Arthur, but not his heart. You cannot give to someone what you have already given to another.” He watched as Arthur held out a wrapped box to Alfred, who laughed as he took it, wasn’t he too old for presents?
Matthew, on the other hand, would have choked had he taken a sip of his drink at that moment. “He what? Everything he said to me the other night, and there wasn’t even the slightest hint that he was seeing someone else.” He began looking around at the partygoers, wondering if that person was there now.
Francis nodded as he watched the scene playing out before them. He really had to admire Arthur’s handiwork. After all these years, he hadn’t lost his touch. Alfred set the box aside and gave Arthur a stiff hug in thanks, which Arthur relaxed into. Over Arthur’s shoulder, Alfred’s eyes seemed to meet with someone’s and he smiled before turning his attention back to the older nation. “He’s not seeing anyone. And to tell would be to acknowledge it. It would make his dance with Arthur quite difficult, non?”
Matthew frowned. “I just don’t see why he can’t just turn him down. He knows he has to. He said he didn’t want to hurt him again.”
Francis nodded. “Fear is the great motivator, and the great hindrance. Arthur is too afraid to confess what he feels and Alfred too afraid to turn him down. But they are different today. Both have realized what they must do, and both must work up the nerve to do it. And all we can do is wait.”
He turned to Matthew and smiled. “So why don’t we go find something fun to Matthieu. Perhaps a special birthday celebration just for you?”
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