Europeans… (10/?)
anonymous
October 4 2009, 03:48:47 UTC
When Alfred pulled up in the van, a bag of McDonalds cheeseburgers resting in the passenger’s seat beside him, and saw Miguel leaning against the side of the house chewing on a cigar, he instantly realized that something had gone south in a profound way.
He parked and jumped out of the car. “Hey, Miguel!”
Miguel looked up at him and his eyes widened in confusion, tucking the cigar back into the pocket of his Hawaiian shirt. He “Alfred, what are you-?”
“What are you doing out here?” he demanded. “Shouldn’t you be in there watching van der Meer? Y’know, the guy we kidnapped?”
“I thought you were watching him!”
“I’ve been out getting food!”
“But, you just-“
Realization hit the two of them simultaneously like a ton of bricks.
“Hoo, boy,” Alfred said understatedly.
They both ran up the steps to the house and flung open the door. They made it into the kitchen, before something smashed against the wall above their head.
“Holy shit!” Alfred shouted, ducking down and covering his neck.
“Pinga!” Miguel agreed, taking similar evasive action.
“You bastards!” a voice much too soft for the loud, angry words shouted.
Alfred glanced up to see Matthew standing in the middle of the kitchen, a plate, like the one that had just met its end, clutched in his hand. There was a somewhat frighteningly large pile of dishes on the table beside him.
“Um, hi, Matthew,” he said conversationally. He had to duck again as another plate hit the wall. Miguel swore even louder than before.
“You bastards,” Matthew repeated.
“Him or me?” Alfred asked hesitantly.
“Both of you!” Matthew put his hands on his hips and glared at them. “You two kidnapped my boyfriend and tied him up in a basement. A basement in Canada. My basement. What is wrong with you?!”
“Listen, Matthew,” Miguel said, trying to be reasonable, while still slightly stooped in case of further fire. “We’re just trying to look out for you…”
“We care about you, Matthew,” Alfred added. “I mean, you’re my brother.”
Matthew’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah? What’s my birthday?”
There was a moment of silence. Alfred could hear some geese honking outside. “…Matthew, I…”
“When is Canada Day?” Matthew repeated.
“…Don’t make this personal,” he said lamely.
Matthew’s eyes widened. “Personal?!” he shouted, voice squeaky with incredulity. “You locked my boyfriend in a basement!”
“Hey,” Miguel piped up defensively. “That guy’s bad news. We both agree.”
Matthew sighed exasperatedly. “I’m glad you agree, but you’re wrong. He’s a nice guy. I really like him, and he really likes me. Okay?”
“Nuh-uh!” Alfred shot back, somewhat aware of how childish his voice sounded. “He’s a twisted old man and he’s just interested in your body.”
“Si,” Miguel added. “Es un cohino.”
Bad move. Matthew looked like he was about to throw every piece of glass in the house at him.
AN: Before the Kink Meme, I never thought that I would find myself googling 'Cuban swear words'. Still, I'm not sure if I'm not just talking gibberish. *shrug*
He parked and jumped out of the car. “Hey, Miguel!”
Miguel looked up at him and his eyes widened in confusion, tucking the cigar back into the pocket of his Hawaiian shirt. He “Alfred, what are you-?”
“What are you doing out here?” he demanded. “Shouldn’t you be in there watching van der Meer? Y’know, the guy we kidnapped?”
“I thought you were watching him!”
“I’ve been out getting food!”
“But, you just-“
Realization hit the two of them simultaneously like a ton of bricks.
“Hoo, boy,” Alfred said understatedly.
They both ran up the steps to the house and flung open the door. They made it into the kitchen, before something smashed against the wall above their head.
“Holy shit!” Alfred shouted, ducking down and covering his neck.
“Pinga!” Miguel agreed, taking similar evasive action.
“You bastards!” a voice much too soft for the loud, angry words shouted.
Alfred glanced up to see Matthew standing in the middle of the kitchen, a plate, like the one that had just met its end, clutched in his hand. There was a somewhat frighteningly large pile of dishes on the table beside him.
“Um, hi, Matthew,” he said conversationally. He had to duck again as another plate hit the wall. Miguel swore even louder than before.
“You bastards,” Matthew repeated.
“Him or me?” Alfred asked hesitantly.
“Both of you!” Matthew put his hands on his hips and glared at them. “You two kidnapped my boyfriend and tied him up in a basement. A basement in Canada. My basement. What is wrong with you?!”
“Listen, Matthew,” Miguel said, trying to be reasonable, while still slightly stooped in case of further fire. “We’re just trying to look out for you…”
“We care about you, Matthew,” Alfred added. “I mean, you’re my brother.”
Matthew’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah? What’s my birthday?”
There was a moment of silence. Alfred could hear some geese honking outside. “…Matthew, I…”
“When is Canada Day?” Matthew repeated.
“…Don’t make this personal,” he said lamely.
Matthew’s eyes widened. “Personal?!” he shouted, voice squeaky with incredulity. “You locked my boyfriend in a basement!”
“Hey,” Miguel piped up defensively. “That guy’s bad news. We both agree.”
Matthew sighed exasperatedly. “I’m glad you agree, but you’re wrong. He’s a nice guy. I really like him, and he really likes me. Okay?”
“Nuh-uh!” Alfred shot back, somewhat aware of how childish his voice sounded. “He’s a twisted old man and he’s just interested in your body.”
“Si,” Miguel added. “Es un cohino.”
Bad move. Matthew looked like he was about to throw every piece of glass in the house at him.
AN: Before the Kink Meme, I never thought that I would find myself googling 'Cuban swear words'. Still, I'm not sure if I'm not just talking gibberish. *shrug*
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