Maybe you're a Sinner (6/6)
anonymous
August 30 2009, 11:09:51 UTC
“What does that say?” he asks in a low, clear voice, afterwards.
Germany is a pillar of grey in the pregnant, bloody silence that hangs in the air. “Nie wieder,” he reads. “Never again.”
“Can you keep that promise?” he turns his head and enquires baldly.
“I hope so.”
“Do you know so?”
Silence, liquid, fills Germany in these moments. “No,” he admits in a whisper.
“What did you do?”
“I killed people,” Ludwig begins, staring at the sad buildings that cluster in the concentration camp. “I put them on trains like animals. I took their names away from them and made them into numbers.” Germany is good with numbers- so good, in fact, that he can count to 21 million deaths. “I hurt Francis, and Ivan, and Italy, and Roderich. I drove my brother away from me. I starved people. I gassed them. I raped them. I tortured them. I started two World Wars and killed in every moment of them.”
He speaks of it almost as if he’s a doctor reading a list of symptoms. Curt. Clinical.
“Why did you do it, Germany?” the boy with the blue, blue eyes and the swept back blond hair asks quietly. Standing in front of the watch house, framed in the snow around him, the boy suddenly seems very alone and out of place. A ghost, lost in time.
Ludwig sighs, haunted. “Because,” he says, “somewhere inside, I am a bad man.”
The gate swings shut as they leave again. Arbeit macht frei.
Work doesn’t set Ludwig free from his own conscience. It won’t. Ever. No matter how long he lives, no matter how much he works, no matter that the rest of the world has already forgiven him. No matter how close Ludwig is to Israel, no matter that he never sings his national anthem, no matter that everything he does is dogged by the ghosts of his memories- Ludwig will never let himself be a free man.
They walk back down the path with the skeleton trees to the bus stop. They leave behind only one pair of footprints.
“I don’t think you‘re a bad man, Germany,” the boy in the antique clothes says, taking his hand as they wait.
Germany swallows down the tears that he never lets himself shed and clenches his teeth. “How can you say that? Who are you to judge me?” he hisses, emotion in his voice for the first time today. “Who are you to say that to me?”
He looks down. The boy is gone. He’ll be back next year, on the same day, on the same platform.
Germany catches the bus back alone.
-
“I wish I was a country,” Sealand says one night. England raises an unimpressed eyebrow, ignoring the Unicorn and the Lion in the corners of the room. In Africa, England’s other children play with machine guns.
“Finland says that I’m allowed to be a country.”
In 1947 Arthur forced Pakistan and Bangladesh to get married. After that, Bangladesh was found bloody and beaten in a mass grave along with her rebels. They’re divorced now, and she still doesn’t talk to him.
Arthur spins the thimble idly on his thumb. “That’s because Finland isn’t your real mother. He’s allowed to say stuff like that.”
Sealand harrumphs. “Well, I’m still gonna be a country.”
A country, like Italy or Germany. Like Turkey or Russia. Like Nigeria, like the children Europe left behind in Africa, not caring about religion or ethnicity or race. Maybe Arthur’s a bad father, because now they all try to kill each other.
Finally, he clears his throat. “It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”
“But you get to do anything you want!”
“…Yes, you do.” England clutches at his last chance to be a good parent. Rwanda and Sudan still haunt him from behind his colonial eyelids.
It’s your fault, the Unicorn whinnies.
That night Alfred calls about the dreams he’s been having- about machine-gunning Vietnam, about being sold as a slave, the Civil War and the Atomic Bombs and he and Ivan being swallowed up by Bear and Eagle. About being raped in Abu Ghraib and drowned in Guantanamo Bay. Sealand’s content snores filter from across the hall; America’s voice over the telephone is shaken and disturbed.
When you’re a country, you get to do anything you want. It’s coming to terms with what you’ve done after the fact that’s the problem.
England rolls over in his bed, can’t sleep, and knows exactly how he feels.
author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 11:33:21 UTC
Countries are allowed to do anything. Sometimes, it's not a good thing.
Did you know?
1. The Italian invasion of Assyria (Ethiopia) in WWII was successful. Until being displaced again by the Allies, the Italian assault and occupation resulted in 5 million Ethiopian deaths.
The Italian Wolf is Italy's national animal.
2. The Stasi were the secret police of East Germany during and after direct Soviet administration. The bugging of houses, kidnapping of residents and searching of government buildings was used to gather intelligence on possible traitors to the communist cause.
During the Russian attack on Germany and directly after tortures as those described above were used on Germans who resisted the Soviet invasion.
Later in the DDR there were several secret correctional facilities, one of which, Hohenscheonhausen, was located in outer Berlin. Here dissidents were kept in solitary confinement and psychologically tortured before being interrogated for information on family, friends and political groups.
The Black Eagle is Germany's national animal.
3. Turkey was responsible for the genocide of a million Armenians in 1915-16 in the First World War. The Armenians, who sided with Russia, were taken to Syria and put into labour camps, or shot. Turkey is yet to formally accept responsibility.
Turkey's national animal is the Grey Wolf.
4. Russia is, well, Russia. Under Stalin, especially, hundreds of thousands of people (including Russians)were randomly executed- millions were put into labour camps in Siberia. The Chechens, Tartars and Kalmyks were mass deported from their homeland.
Stalin is quoted- "One man's death is a tragedy; a million is a statistic."
Russia's national animal is the Bear.
5. Although Poland was the country that resisted German invasion the strongest, the all pervasive antisemitic atmosphere did eventually reach Poland. At the same time that most Poles helped Jews escape the German regime and protected their neighbours, Jew Hunters (Szmalcownik) would blackmail and kill Jews as well as hand them in to the Nazis.
In Jedwabne between 800 and 1600 Jews were killed by Polish civilians under German surveillance.
Poland's two national animals are the Stalk, and the White Eagle.
6. Israel is a victim, but also the perpetrator.
7. Nazi Germany is though to be responsible for 21 million deaths of civilians through the Holocaust and concentration camps.
In Dachau, the first such camp ever built, stands a memorial with the words "Never again" written in 7 languages.
8. England, France and Spain are thought to be indirectly responsible for the violence and genocides in Africa and South America, because of their colonial practice of making countries out of tribes that hated each other.
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 14:46:18 UTC
Powerful.
And what I most loved - despite everything, despite it all - is the fact that Ludwig, who perpretrated the most abominable crimes in the history of the human race is really the only one who faces up to them. The only one who isn't saying 'it's not my fault', or even falling back on that old excuse - 'I was only following orders'. The only one who faces up to what he does and is genuinely, truely sorry - my heart broke when he said that he was a bad man.
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 15:16:44 UTC
God. That was amazing; very powerful and moving.
The part with Germany was what got me the most -- the way he's so stoic (for want of a better word) about it all and accepts it, unlike the others even considering that...well, the crimes they committed are some of the worst against humanity.
RE number 8 of your notes; *sigh* It makes me ashamed of my country's history. (I'm British.) We did some truly horrible things because of imperialism.
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 19:23:52 UTC
Thanks for writing this, especially the part about Ethiopia. Few people know about it at all. But it shouldn't be a forgotten war, it must be remembered. I'm still stunned that the vatican (or at least most Italian bishops) actually supported it.
And thanks for including the Armenian genocide. I have Turkish friends and their reactions to it are pretty much the same as Sadiq's. They don't want to know. And the Armenians sided with Russia, they were enemies of the state. Deporting them was an act of self-defence. Turkey was the victim. But I'm sure there are also many Turks who know of the genocide and feel sorry for it.
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 19:30:00 UTC
Small correction author!anon: Stalin is quoted- "One man's death is a tragedy; a million is a statistic." Despite the general misconception, Joseph Stalin never said that. The quote, in fact, is the final line of chapter eight of The Black Obelisk (1956) by Erich Maria Remarque.
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 19:44:18 UTC
So heavy indeed. And so true that no nation is the complete victim, everyone commited crimes, sometimes, and not all of them are willing to admit this.
Your descriptions flowed and moved like water, smooth and elegant. I also appreciate you treating everyone the same, even those usually thought of as the victims; it really added power to the story. I suppose no one is innocent; not anymore.
Thank you for sharing your talent with us, Writer!Anon~ <3
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 30 2009, 23:44:26 UTC
...This is just... Wow. There is no way in the world my fill is going to be able to even compare to this. No nation is innocent in this world, no person is sinless. After all, countries are built on bloodshed and war. Andthe saddest part is that... Sometimes the nations have no control over these things. And other times its the people that have no control. Even places with no military of theor own like Hong Kong or Liechtenstein are covered in blood. I suppose we'll never look at those cute little personifications of countries the same way again.
Re: author's note
anonymous
August 31 2009, 03:59:24 UTC
This was AMAZING. I loved it so much, all the details and the denial, and the guilt burning at them.
*coughs* Um... Any chance you'd be interested in writing a sequel to this with the Asian nations? I'm thinking of Japan, and his actions in Okinawa and China in WWII in particular...
author!anon
anonymous
August 31 2009, 07:58:58 UTC
Consider it done, good anon. Consider it done. :) Give me a few days to research- what was it you mentioned up-thread?- the lesser known Asian nations etc, and I'll get back to you.
The Original draft of (above) contained both China and Japan, but the word count was getting unmanageable, so I cut them. I'll rework them into something over the next week or so. ^^
Germany is a pillar of grey in the pregnant, bloody silence that hangs in the air. “Nie wieder,” he reads. “Never again.”
“Can you keep that promise?” he turns his head and enquires baldly.
“I hope so.”
“Do you know so?”
Silence, liquid, fills Germany in these moments. “No,” he admits in a whisper.
“What did you do?”
“I killed people,” Ludwig begins, staring at the sad buildings that cluster in the concentration camp. “I put them on trains like animals. I took their names away from them and made them into numbers.” Germany is good with numbers- so good, in fact, that he can count to 21 million deaths. “I hurt Francis, and Ivan, and Italy, and Roderich. I drove my brother away from me. I starved people. I gassed them. I raped them. I tortured them. I started two World Wars and killed in every moment of them.”
He speaks of it almost as if he’s a doctor reading a list of symptoms. Curt. Clinical.
“Why did you do it, Germany?” the boy with the blue, blue eyes and the swept back blond hair asks quietly. Standing in front of the watch house, framed in the snow around him, the boy suddenly seems very alone and out of place. A ghost, lost in time.
Ludwig sighs, haunted. “Because,” he says, “somewhere inside, I am a bad man.”
The gate swings shut as they leave again. Arbeit macht frei.
Work doesn’t set Ludwig free from his own conscience. It won’t. Ever. No matter how long he lives, no matter how much he works, no matter that the rest of the world has already forgiven him. No matter how close Ludwig is to Israel, no matter that he never sings his national anthem, no matter that everything he does is dogged by the ghosts of his memories- Ludwig will never let himself be a free man.
They walk back down the path with the skeleton trees to the bus stop. They leave behind only one pair of footprints.
“I don’t think you‘re a bad man, Germany,” the boy in the antique clothes says, taking his hand as they wait.
Germany swallows down the tears that he never lets himself shed and clenches his teeth. “How can you say that? Who are you to judge me?” he hisses, emotion in his voice for the first time today. “Who are you to say that to me?”
He looks down. The boy is gone. He’ll be back next year, on the same day, on the same platform.
Germany catches the bus back alone.
-
“I wish I was a country,” Sealand says one night. England raises an unimpressed eyebrow, ignoring the Unicorn and the Lion in the corners of the room. In Africa, England’s other children play with machine guns.
“Finland says that I’m allowed to be a country.”
In 1947 Arthur forced Pakistan and Bangladesh to get married. After that, Bangladesh was found bloody and beaten in a mass grave along with her rebels. They’re divorced now, and she still doesn’t talk to him.
Arthur spins the thimble idly on his thumb. “That’s because Finland isn’t your real mother. He’s allowed to say stuff like that.”
Sealand harrumphs. “Well, I’m still gonna be a country.”
A country, like Italy or Germany. Like Turkey or Russia. Like Nigeria, like the children Europe left behind in Africa, not caring about religion or ethnicity or race. Maybe Arthur’s a bad father, because now they all try to kill each other.
Finally, he clears his throat. “It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”
“But you get to do anything you want!”
“…Yes, you do.” England clutches at his last chance to be a good parent. Rwanda and Sudan still haunt him from behind his colonial eyelids.
It’s your fault, the Unicorn whinnies.
That night Alfred calls about the dreams he’s been having- about machine-gunning Vietnam, about being sold as a slave, the Civil War and the Atomic Bombs and he and Ivan being swallowed up by Bear and Eagle. About being raped in Abu Ghraib and drowned in Guantanamo Bay. Sealand’s content snores filter from across the hall; America’s voice over the telephone is shaken and disturbed.
When you’re a country, you get to do anything you want. It’s coming to terms with what you’ve done after the fact that’s the problem.
England rolls over in his bed, can’t sleep, and knows exactly how he feels.
-
Reply
Did you know?
1. The Italian invasion of Assyria (Ethiopia) in WWII was successful. Until being displaced again by the Allies, the Italian assault and occupation resulted in 5 million Ethiopian deaths.
The Italian Wolf is Italy's national animal.
2. The Stasi were the secret police of East Germany during and after direct Soviet administration. The bugging of houses, kidnapping of residents and searching of government buildings was used to gather intelligence on possible traitors to the communist cause.
During the Russian attack on Germany and directly after tortures as those described above were used on Germans who resisted the Soviet invasion.
Later in the DDR there were several secret correctional facilities, one of which, Hohenscheonhausen, was located in outer Berlin. Here dissidents were kept in solitary confinement and psychologically tortured before being interrogated for information on family, friends and political groups.
The Black Eagle is Germany's national animal.
3. Turkey was responsible for the genocide of a million Armenians in 1915-16 in the First World War. The Armenians, who sided with Russia, were taken to Syria and put into labour camps, or shot. Turkey is yet to formally accept responsibility.
Turkey's national animal is the Grey Wolf.
4. Russia is, well, Russia. Under Stalin, especially, hundreds of thousands of people (including Russians)were randomly executed- millions were put into labour camps in Siberia. The Chechens, Tartars and Kalmyks were mass deported from their homeland.
Stalin is quoted- "One man's death is a tragedy; a million is a statistic."
Russia's national animal is the Bear.
5. Although Poland was the country that resisted German invasion the strongest, the all pervasive antisemitic atmosphere did eventually reach Poland. At the same time that most Poles helped Jews escape the German regime and protected their neighbours, Jew Hunters (Szmalcownik) would blackmail and kill Jews as well as hand them in to the Nazis.
In Jedwabne between 800 and 1600 Jews were killed by Polish civilians under German surveillance.
Poland's two national animals are the Stalk, and the White Eagle.
6. Israel is a victim, but also the perpetrator.
7. Nazi Germany is though to be responsible for 21 million deaths of civilians through the Holocaust and concentration camps.
In Dachau, the first such camp ever built, stands a memorial with the words "Never again" written in 7 languages.
8. England, France and Spain are thought to be indirectly responsible for the violence and genocides in Africa and South America, because of their colonial practice of making countries out of tribes that hated each other.
Bangaladesh and Pakistan are one such example.
That was heavy. >.
Reply
Too put it simply, You blew me away author!Anon
Reply
i think i'm going to go read it again. because it was beautiful.
Reply
And what I most loved - despite everything, despite it all - is the fact that Ludwig, who perpretrated the most abominable crimes in the history of the human race is really the only one who faces up to them. The only one who isn't saying 'it's not my fault', or even falling back on that old excuse - 'I was only following orders'. The only one who faces up to what he does and is genuinely, truely sorry - my heart broke when he said that he was a bad man.
Loved the HRE reference, btw.
Reply
The part with Germany was what got me the most -- the way he's so stoic (for want of a better word) about it all and accepts it, unlike the others even considering that...well, the crimes they committed are some of the worst against humanity.
RE number 8 of your notes; *sigh* It makes me ashamed of my country's history. (I'm British.) We did some truly horrible things because of imperialism.
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Oh yeah, welcome to the sad history club. That makes three of us and your'e the only one who actually did Europe!
Reply
And thanks for including the Armenian genocide. I have Turkish friends and their reactions to it are pretty much the same as Sadiq's. They don't want to know. And the Armenians sided with Russia, they were enemies of the state. Deporting them was an act of self-defence. Turkey was the victim.
But I'm sure there are also many Turks who know of the genocide and feel sorry for it.
Reply
Stalin is quoted- "One man's death is a tragedy; a million is a statistic."
Despite the general misconception, Joseph Stalin never said that. The quote, in fact, is the final line of chapter eight of The Black Obelisk (1956) by Erich Maria Remarque.
Even so, the fill is good.
Reply
Reply
Your descriptions flowed and moved like water, smooth and elegant. I also appreciate you treating everyone the same, even those usually thought of as the victims; it really added power to the story. I suppose no one is innocent; not anymore.
Thank you for sharing your talent with us, Writer!Anon~ <3
Reply
Captcha: 43 Emblems... =.O
Reply
*coughs* Um... Any chance you'd be interested in writing a sequel to this with the Asian nations? I'm thinking of Japan, and his actions in Okinawa and China in WWII in particular...
Reply
The Original draft of (above) contained both China and Japan, but the word count was getting unmanageable, so I cut them. I'll rework them into something over the next week or so. ^^
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Still, I will MORE than look forward to this!
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