I just want to see for myself
I'm hung up on writing about my trip home but I don't know what to say about it. Allow myself...to grant...myself...the freedom not to write about my wholly bittersweet trip. I miss my mom and jeremy and thus was glad to see them, but in the shell of what was once our house, all packed away and minimally furnished as my mom has now moved to the keys; it was a veritable slap in the mouth from adulthood that I didn't see coming. Hard to part with my house, my family, my friends, my out. My anxiety used to be kept in check by the knowledge that if I fail at life I can always move back home with my mom, but my mom is no longer a real parent. She is doing what she wants with her adult life now that her rotten kids left her alone in Buffalo. Fucking the least I can do is write in my god damned live journal.