2006--and still sucking
Copy and paste the first sentence (or few sentences) of your first entry for each month of 2006. Leave out birthday shout-outs, quizzes, and the like.
January: How should I start this train-wreck of a story? Ok, here it goes:
On December 28th, I dropped $85 on a dress and capelet for what I was told was a "formal" New Years party. On December 28th, I lied to my boss about being at the bank on the other side of town in traffic so I could buy some time to find the perfect dress for the "formal" New Years party in Chicago. On December 28th, I nearly killed Samir Patel for misinforming me about the party and the plans after I had bought the perfect dress. We had a brutal fight over the phone and this fight was only the beginning of more shit to come over the next 5 days.
February:
Yay! Now I have internet in my OWN apartment. I managed to make the first month's rent which made me pretty happy...now if I could do better on my grocery budget. Work is...well, work. I can do my job and not deal with all the drama that I had at BAM...well, so far.
March:
Can a living person haunt you? How do you let go of someone whom you've known your whole life? All I have to do is write one email and she'll be out of my life forever...at least I hope so. I have a new life now and I thought I could handle dealing with her, but I can't.
April:
Whoa, did I actually put the word STUDYING in there? And yes, for the record I have officially made my first attempt at studying the GRE.
May:
I've been obsessing about the status of my relationship for the past few weeks, or however long it's been since I've updated. Whenever I ask Samir how he feels about it, he says, "I don't know", and tries to avoid the subject altogether. It bothres me that he doesn't tell me how he's feeling or what he's thinking. Maybe if I knew it might make things easier....
June:
After months of certain people annoying the hell out of me to get on myspace.com, I finally did it.
July:
Although I had been dreading it, I spent today with Samir. There’s not much I can say except that now there is some closure to the issue of what constitutes “us”. I realized that he is not so heartless as I had thought, and that he still loves me very much and wants me in his life, if not as a girlfriend, then as a close friend. He told me that what he wants most is for me to find happiness, even if it’s not with him-and that he will always love me in some way, shape, or form for as long as he lives. He kept saying over and over how sorry he was for putting me through all of this, and how he didn’t think it would turn out like this, and I reminded him that it was his decision that brought all of this unhappiness and weirdness between us. He said to give him some more time to figure it all out---which doesn’t mean I should put my life on hold or that he’ll string me along; as soon as he made a decision, he’d tell me. And somehow, I can’t hate him, even though I hate the situation. He was completely honest with me, and as I was crying in front of him, I could see that it hurt him just as much. Maybe we never realize what courses our actions take until we see the results, even if they are painful to witness.
August:
Again, I'm confused. On one hand, I want to teach, because I think that I could do well at it and inspire young minds to go on to greater things; and on the other hand, with this possible internship, I'm really interested in pursuing a master's in museum sciences. In the meantime, I have my GRE which I've been putting off for a year and desperately need to take a class for and this dead-end job I'm in, that takes up my day schedule.
September:
Lately, I've been seeing this new guy Yury that I met a couple of weeks ago at Hush. He seemed interesting and nice when we talked, and when I hung out with him a week ago we had great conversations. Since then I've been noticing a few things and something about this whole arrangement doesn't smell right. Am I getting paranoid? Probably. Suspicious? You bet. I've been making small observations all along and trying to remain as impartial about his character as I can--but when he moves faster than I want him to, then it's time to either put on the brakes or stop the car altogether.
October:
Since I've taken on that second job at Spencer's and the challenge of storytime, things have been tiring. Granted, I AM getting better at reading to the little tots (monsters is more like it) and have gotten compliments from their parents, but it does drain on your energy. At least at Spencer's I can be a bit of a smartass; some guy was asking for different weird costumes and was being a general idiot, so I mentioned that we had a "dick" costume---that shut him up quick.
November:
Today I had the unfortunate experience of dealing with my health insurance and finding out that my doctor put me on birth control that costs $80/month (!!!!) if I were to continue using it after my samples. Fabulous. Oh yeah, and I met my deductible--at least until January 1st rolls around. It's ridiculous crap like this that makes me wish I was part of a socialist healthcare system.
December:
Today, my heart got the ax. Brett and I are no longer dating. Talk about amazing timing. I asked him if we were still on, and he said he didn't think it was a good idea for him to be in a relationship-- too bad he couldn't have alerted me to that fact before he started acting like a boyfriend. Rejection is a deep wound, especially for me, and after dealing with heartbreak after heartbreak this year, I'm all out of heart.
Man, this year really sucked! Maybe I should have stayed in bed and never woke up! All of my man troubes and dissapointments this year make me think I should join a nunnery or the Peace Corps or something far away where I have no access to any form of communication at all!!
January: How should I start this train-wreck of a story? Ok, here it goes:
On December 28th, I dropped $85 on a dress and capelet for what I was told was a "formal" New Years party. On December 28th, I lied to my boss about being at the bank on the other side of town in traffic so I could buy some time to find the perfect dress for the "formal" New Years party in Chicago. On December 28th, I nearly killed Samir Patel for misinforming me about the party and the plans after I had bought the perfect dress. We had a brutal fight over the phone and this fight was only the beginning of more shit to come over the next 5 days.
February:
Yay! Now I have internet in my OWN apartment. I managed to make the first month's rent which made me pretty happy...now if I could do better on my grocery budget. Work is...well, work. I can do my job and not deal with all the drama that I had at BAM...well, so far.
March:
Can a living person haunt you? How do you let go of someone whom you've known your whole life? All I have to do is write one email and she'll be out of my life forever...at least I hope so. I have a new life now and I thought I could handle dealing with her, but I can't.
April:
Whoa, did I actually put the word STUDYING in there? And yes, for the record I have officially made my first attempt at studying the GRE.
May:
I've been obsessing about the status of my relationship for the past few weeks, or however long it's been since I've updated. Whenever I ask Samir how he feels about it, he says, "I don't know", and tries to avoid the subject altogether. It bothres me that he doesn't tell me how he's feeling or what he's thinking. Maybe if I knew it might make things easier....
June:
After months of certain people annoying the hell out of me to get on myspace.com, I finally did it.
July:
Although I had been dreading it, I spent today with Samir. There’s not much I can say except that now there is some closure to the issue of what constitutes “us”. I realized that he is not so heartless as I had thought, and that he still loves me very much and wants me in his life, if not as a girlfriend, then as a close friend. He told me that what he wants most is for me to find happiness, even if it’s not with him-and that he will always love me in some way, shape, or form for as long as he lives. He kept saying over and over how sorry he was for putting me through all of this, and how he didn’t think it would turn out like this, and I reminded him that it was his decision that brought all of this unhappiness and weirdness between us. He said to give him some more time to figure it all out---which doesn’t mean I should put my life on hold or that he’ll string me along; as soon as he made a decision, he’d tell me. And somehow, I can’t hate him, even though I hate the situation. He was completely honest with me, and as I was crying in front of him, I could see that it hurt him just as much. Maybe we never realize what courses our actions take until we see the results, even if they are painful to witness.
August:
Again, I'm confused. On one hand, I want to teach, because I think that I could do well at it and inspire young minds to go on to greater things; and on the other hand, with this possible internship, I'm really interested in pursuing a master's in museum sciences. In the meantime, I have my GRE which I've been putting off for a year and desperately need to take a class for and this dead-end job I'm in, that takes up my day schedule.
September:
Lately, I've been seeing this new guy Yury that I met a couple of weeks ago at Hush. He seemed interesting and nice when we talked, and when I hung out with him a week ago we had great conversations. Since then I've been noticing a few things and something about this whole arrangement doesn't smell right. Am I getting paranoid? Probably. Suspicious? You bet. I've been making small observations all along and trying to remain as impartial about his character as I can--but when he moves faster than I want him to, then it's time to either put on the brakes or stop the car altogether.
October:
Since I've taken on that second job at Spencer's and the challenge of storytime, things have been tiring. Granted, I AM getting better at reading to the little tots (monsters is more like it) and have gotten compliments from their parents, but it does drain on your energy. At least at Spencer's I can be a bit of a smartass; some guy was asking for different weird costumes and was being a general idiot, so I mentioned that we had a "dick" costume---that shut him up quick.
November:
Today I had the unfortunate experience of dealing with my health insurance and finding out that my doctor put me on birth control that costs $80/month (!!!!) if I were to continue using it after my samples. Fabulous. Oh yeah, and I met my deductible--at least until January 1st rolls around. It's ridiculous crap like this that makes me wish I was part of a socialist healthcare system.
December:
Today, my heart got the ax. Brett and I are no longer dating. Talk about amazing timing. I asked him if we were still on, and he said he didn't think it was a good idea for him to be in a relationship-- too bad he couldn't have alerted me to that fact before he started acting like a boyfriend. Rejection is a deep wound, especially for me, and after dealing with heartbreak after heartbreak this year, I'm all out of heart.
Man, this year really sucked! Maybe I should have stayed in bed and never woke up! All of my man troubes and dissapointments this year make me think I should join a nunnery or the Peace Corps or something far away where I have no access to any form of communication at all!!