Interesting. Maybe a bit close to home...
Avoidant person
Desires:
Wants to be connected, but not closely
Fears:
Greatest fear is intimacy/engulfment
Can have a hard time rejecting others or saying no
Attracted to:
Individuals who provide much of the enthusiasm and intimacy for both of them
Behaviors:
Ambivalence all the way through may be in relationship because can't say no
Process of person's relationship(s)
May show initial traditional romantic pursuing, but ultimately enters relationship because love addict provides most of the “intimate energy”; may fear would never make into a relationship otherwise
As love addict wants more and more attention avoidant attempts to please by giving it to them--at least initially
Eventually avoidant becomes overwhelmed by enmeshment and/or neediness of love addict, becomes critical, and eventually backs off from relationship or abandons it
Feels relationship has failed, sometimes gets involved with addictive behavior or affairs to distance, distract, or numb out
May return to relationship out of guilt or fear of being totally alone, or moves on to connect with another partner
Cycle of abandoning and returning can go on and on, especially if love addict starts to move on
Comments? Does this sound like me?
Desires:
Wants to be connected, but not closely
Fears:
Greatest fear is intimacy/engulfment
Can have a hard time rejecting others or saying no
Attracted to:
Individuals who provide much of the enthusiasm and intimacy for both of them
Behaviors:
Ambivalence all the way through may be in relationship because can't say no
Process of person's relationship(s)
May show initial traditional romantic pursuing, but ultimately enters relationship because love addict provides most of the “intimate energy”; may fear would never make into a relationship otherwise
As love addict wants more and more attention avoidant attempts to please by giving it to them--at least initially
Eventually avoidant becomes overwhelmed by enmeshment and/or neediness of love addict, becomes critical, and eventually backs off from relationship or abandons it
Feels relationship has failed, sometimes gets involved with addictive behavior or affairs to distance, distract, or numb out
May return to relationship out of guilt or fear of being totally alone, or moves on to connect with another partner
Cycle of abandoning and returning can go on and on, especially if love addict starts to move on
Comments? Does this sound like me?