i can not live with these temptations to kill her
this week has been rough... on sunday night sara calls me crying saying that i had to take her rats cuz her and dan were getting kicked out...and then on monday i found out they were in north carolina, no call, no notice no good bye just gone.... i cried for like 8 hours all together sunday and monday.... i cant stand to loose anything else i dont think theres much left to take..what the fuck... but i spent the day yesterday with adam he made me feel better....among other things... we did alot we went allover west orlando and then to his house... i dont knwo what im supposed to do... am i supposed to let it all go and when im with him im with him or if i should leave it all alone all together or if i should still fight for him... i know that neither one of us can reallly handle a "relationship" but i wish there wasnt any one else involved in all of this cuz if it was just me and him i wouldnt have anything to worry about but since there are other persons involved i have to worry about what his intentions are and if hes just trying to have 2 diferent girls to fuck or what i almost felt that way yesterday... but then i relized how he was holding me and how he was looking at me and i cant belive after everything ive been through he would do something like that to me...at least i hope not.... i wish i had some way to seee what he was thinking so i could know what to do i guess all i can do is ask all those stupid ass questions that i never knew how to ask.... its not fair......i guess illl just have to stumble over my words and try to talk to him