i admit that i'm just a fool for you.
wow. break is over, and im definitely not ready for school. but then again, who is. i hung out with him today. and i like him. i really do. and it just amazes me. that im capable of having a relationship. but i think i joke too much. annoyingly. and i dont mean to, but it just seems to happen. the way i act around boys. and i need to learn to quit. my friends notice it. kind of fake. not the real jenna. daniels jenna. and i always thought i was being me. so now im confused. about everything in general, but dwelling on this thought. i dont know, this is all just so new to me, and i think it will calm down. i will calm down. and hopefully it wont take too long. it just sounds like the things my psychiatrist tells me. that shes not going to put me on medication, just change my way of thinking. oh wow. this just gives me another thing to talk to her about. goody. and last night, as im sure everyone has already heard, no mans land was busted. and the cops were nice, and let us go. but with our parents. and for that, im lucky. i dont need another ticket to worry about. another reason for my parents to look down on me. so i think im going to mellow out for awhile. i adore drinking, and i look forward to it every night. and that is the problem. its beginning to consume my life, and im finally starting to have a problem with that. my night isnt fun if i dont drink. get fucked up. receive unknown bruises. run into trees. melt the soles of my shoes. wake up, only to wonder what it was i did the night before. but it was all fine, i was drinking. so im going to take things into moderation. i just need to think about it all. because i dont have too much of a problem with my drinking, but my mom does. and my dad. and whoever else. but ill figure it out..