hong kong again
I guess it's only really times when I don't have readily available friends around me that I feel the need to write in a blog. However, over the past year or two I have developed an interest in writing. Mainly in fiction. I have been thinking that to continue this interest and to give myself more practice, I will start a new blog in relations to my new brand label "Principles of King" more details when i actually start it not that anyone is reading besides carrie.
My grandma has recently passed and I still have a hard time of accepting it. I've cried about it for days and even (relatively secretly) cried about it on the plane to hong kong. I think I'm finaly over tears about it but the tear in my heart has yet to heal. My grandma and I are not too close. She is very closed mouthed and for the longest time I have been to shy to ask about her. I have asked about her apst last year while I was at the hospital with her but it just seems like small glimpses of her life and bigger things were still hidden somewhere that she either doesn't want to reveal or doesn't want to bother to reveal. I only wish I knew about her life more since I've started to develop a keen interst in learngin the development of a person and also because she has asked me to make her one of her funeral outfits. In chinese culture when a person dies, the family is to burn 7 outfits for them to bring to the after life. Before she has passed away, my grandmother has made herself 6 outfits. She saved the last one for me to design/make to show her support in my studies in fashion. I wish I knew about her more so that my design was not merely created out of my taste but with touches of past to remind her of her full life while in this world. However, it is too late for that now. I have already a design in mind and I have the fabrics chosen and will be purchased tomorrow. I was talking to the housekeeper about the fabrics today and she told me in her dreams my grandmother has kept asking her to give her clothes with red flowers on it and today I had brought a fabric with exactly that. I heart Derren Brown and I know he would say that this is just serendipitous coincidence, but I guess in times of sadness, things like this doesn't really seem so coincidential. Maybe my grandmother is speaking to us from beyond the grave. I just wish she was more comfortable in talking to me. If we weren't so estranged maybe she would come to me to talk and I can ask the questions I want to ask.
My grandma has recently passed and I still have a hard time of accepting it. I've cried about it for days and even (relatively secretly) cried about it on the plane to hong kong. I think I'm finaly over tears about it but the tear in my heart has yet to heal. My grandma and I are not too close. She is very closed mouthed and for the longest time I have been to shy to ask about her. I have asked about her apst last year while I was at the hospital with her but it just seems like small glimpses of her life and bigger things were still hidden somewhere that she either doesn't want to reveal or doesn't want to bother to reveal. I only wish I knew about her life more since I've started to develop a keen interst in learngin the development of a person and also because she has asked me to make her one of her funeral outfits. In chinese culture when a person dies, the family is to burn 7 outfits for them to bring to the after life. Before she has passed away, my grandmother has made herself 6 outfits. She saved the last one for me to design/make to show her support in my studies in fashion. I wish I knew about her more so that my design was not merely created out of my taste but with touches of past to remind her of her full life while in this world. However, it is too late for that now. I have already a design in mind and I have the fabrics chosen and will be purchased tomorrow. I was talking to the housekeeper about the fabrics today and she told me in her dreams my grandmother has kept asking her to give her clothes with red flowers on it and today I had brought a fabric with exactly that. I heart Derren Brown and I know he would say that this is just serendipitous coincidence, but I guess in times of sadness, things like this doesn't really seem so coincidential. Maybe my grandmother is speaking to us from beyond the grave. I just wish she was more comfortable in talking to me. If we weren't so estranged maybe she would come to me to talk and I can ask the questions I want to ask.