(no subject)
I..................... had a weekend. A weekend of awesomeness.
I am not sure I can find the words to explain all this.
I had not really realized that I was unhappy. I had not realized that I had misplaced my ability to wonder. I had not noticed that i had ceased to practice magic, much less to believe in it.
on saturday, I dragged primaleph to go see my family with me. it went better than I expected.
my aunt robin told the story of her taking my mother's ashes to scatter them off her favorite jetty in Cape May.
Suffice it to say... my mother had a sense of humor, and it was a PERFECT send-off.
Then we drove around Lancaster Co. a bit, visiting different places. Nostalgia happened.
The party started around 7, i spent a frantic hour getting my costume on, helping sara and meg with their costumes, and delegating the rest of the decorations to Jester, because he was taller than me.
wandered downstairs, got a drink, sat in the corner and watched people for awhile.
Smoking, talking, drinking.... fireworks with rednecks, more talking. went inside to watch a tarot reading. Saw a girl in need ofbeing petted, or maybe just saw an opportunity to pet someone and took it. *wink* Ended up spending HOURS talking to her...... and a few other things, although we were being EXTRAORDINARILY good, learned so much, was reminded of so very many things I had forgotten.
went to bed a few hours later, after watching the rest of the group play truth or dare. I'm still too chicken. Slept with primaleph , because two warm bodies in a bed is better than 1 cold body alone. He's snuggly, and warm.
sunday, we woke up, had homemade waffles, said goodbye as people left, cleaned up, and took off for the Pinnacle.
damn. there's nothing like it. It's just the river, stretching away far below, the rocks under you, and the sky all around, with hawks wheeling around below. After Saturday night's catylyzing conversation, I rediscovered magic. hell yes, hail lucifer, eris, and anyone else who may be listening.
spent the ride home and most of today being ridden by Puck, after i invoked him, and tried an all new to me way of working. am rather enjoying it. I might just decide to do that more often. It's.... well, its like being possessedby a bloodthirsty, maniacal fae, really. In other words... it's fun.
and that's all for now.
I'm sure i'll have more later... there are a few parts i need to think more about before i post them.
I am not sure I can find the words to explain all this.
I had not really realized that I was unhappy. I had not realized that I had misplaced my ability to wonder. I had not noticed that i had ceased to practice magic, much less to believe in it.
on saturday, I dragged primaleph to go see my family with me. it went better than I expected.
my aunt robin told the story of her taking my mother's ashes to scatter them off her favorite jetty in Cape May.
Suffice it to say... my mother had a sense of humor, and it was a PERFECT send-off.
Then we drove around Lancaster Co. a bit, visiting different places. Nostalgia happened.
The party started around 7, i spent a frantic hour getting my costume on, helping sara and meg with their costumes, and delegating the rest of the decorations to Jester, because he was taller than me.
wandered downstairs, got a drink, sat in the corner and watched people for awhile.
Smoking, talking, drinking.... fireworks with rednecks, more talking. went inside to watch a tarot reading. Saw a girl in need ofbeing petted, or maybe just saw an opportunity to pet someone and took it. *wink* Ended up spending HOURS talking to her...... and a few other things, although we were being EXTRAORDINARILY good, learned so much, was reminded of so very many things I had forgotten.
went to bed a few hours later, after watching the rest of the group play truth or dare. I'm still too chicken. Slept with primaleph , because two warm bodies in a bed is better than 1 cold body alone. He's snuggly, and warm.
sunday, we woke up, had homemade waffles, said goodbye as people left, cleaned up, and took off for the Pinnacle.
damn. there's nothing like it. It's just the river, stretching away far below, the rocks under you, and the sky all around, with hawks wheeling around below. After Saturday night's catylyzing conversation, I rediscovered magic. hell yes, hail lucifer, eris, and anyone else who may be listening.
spent the ride home and most of today being ridden by Puck, after i invoked him, and tried an all new to me way of working. am rather enjoying it. I might just decide to do that more often. It's.... well, its like being possessedby a bloodthirsty, maniacal fae, really. In other words... it's fun.
and that's all for now.
I'm sure i'll have more later... there are a few parts i need to think more about before i post them.