We Are Love, 3
Title:We Are Love
Author: heartsdesire456
Rating: Eventually NC-17
POV: 3rd
Pairing: Marcel Gothow(Shin)/ Gustav Schafer
Summary: In life there were always moments when a single choice or action made all the difference. There were tiny details that could come to change lives forever. There were split-second decisions that would set in motion changes throughout one’s life, twisting and turning every second of one’s future based on a single, solitary event.
When he took a seat in almost the very back of the lecture hall on the first morning of class, Marcel had no way of knowing that his choice of seat would be one of those decisions.
A fic in which Marcel and Gustav happen to go to the same University and meet unexpectedly (based on the rumors about Gustav attending University during the break).
Disclaimer: "-Fic.tion: [noun] something feigned, invented, or imagined; a made-up story"
Author's Note: MUAHAHAHA! Have another chapter!
Marcel had already ordered a latte and got a small table in the back corner before Gustav showed up. He started to wave, only to blink and shrink back some when he saw Gustav wasn’t only with a friend, but there was a very big man in black trying to blend into the crowd. The man in black was wearing a pair of dark jeans and a black leather jacket, as well as a newspaper- clearly attempting to blend, but he was about seven feet tall and looked like he could easily swallow Marcel whole and not even be uncomfortable.
Marcel also felt uncomfortable with the fact that Gustav had a friend with him, leaving Marcel feeling sort of out of place. The friend and man in black went to the counter to wait in line, but Gustav headed straight for him when he spotted him. “Hi,” Marcel offered, and Gustav sighed heavily, sitting down beside him with a dark look.
“I am so sorry,” he said in a low, earnest voice, eyes growing somewhat wider. Marcel’s chest clenched a bit at how much those big brown eyes reminded him of a puppy. “I swear, I was on my way out the door when my asshole best friend showed up and when I said I had to go somewhere, he just invited himself. I tried to make him not, but he did anyways,” he said. “I understand entirely if you like… hate me now,” he muttered, looking honestly sorry.
Marcel just smiled and shook his head, taking a brave chance as he spoke. “It’s okay. Um… if I’d known I would be the uneven number, I would’ve brought Carsten, but… it’s alright, you can’t help when your friends are annoying.”
Gustav just smiled brightly. “You are far too understanding,” he said, then sighed. “So... how are you today?” he asked, and Marcel laughed.
“Well, you spoke to me not even an hour ago, so I’m just as fine now as I was then, but if you must know, I’m glad you wanted to see me again,” he admitted and Gustav just smiled at him, neither of them speaking for a few moments.
Marcel felt like a complete dork to be caught smiling lamely at each other when Gustav’s friend sat down with a flop. “Well thanks for just walking off and making me pay for your crap,” the friend said, shoving a coffee at Gustav, before glancing at Marcel with a raised eyebrow. “Ah, so this is where we were in such a hurry to be,” he said and Marcel ducked his eyes bashfully.
Gustav just scoffed. “I told you, Georg, you weren’t invited, but nooo, you had to come along. So now, you do not get to tease,” he declared and Marcel shot him a thankful smile.
The boy tossed his ponytail and scoffed. “If I had known it was a date, I would’ve still followed you, just to ruin your chances.” He smirked and gestured with his coffee. “It’s only fair to cockblock when my girlfriend is gone for two more weeks. If I’m not getting any, neither are you, my friend,” he said, and Marcel flushed, giving him an annoyed look.
Gustav glared. “I met him yesterday, asshole,” he said flatly and Georg shrugged.
“Hey, you never know, maybe he’s easy-“
Shin nearly choked on his coffee. “Hey!” he said, glaring at him. “I let a lot slide, but I will not sit here and let you suggest you know a damn thing about me to call me a slut!” he said, giving him a dark look.
Gustav looked absolutely mortified. “I am so sorry for him. If it will make you feel better, please know nobody will find his body tomorrow, or ever again,” he declared, then glared at his friend.
Georg just smiled. “Hey, I’m just messing with him,” he said, offering his hand to Marcel. “Georg Listing,” he said and Marcel shot him a dirty look, crossing his arms pointedly, refusing his handshake. “Oh don’t be like that, I didn’t mean to insult you-“
“You called him easy, Georg, what the hell else would he be other than insulted?!” Gustav hissed. “Really, Marcel,” he said, turning to him again. “Ridiculously sorry about him,” he urged and Marcel rolled his eyes.
“Well, I guess judging you by your friend wouldn’t be fair,” he relented, and Gustav gave him a hopeful look that Marcel found absolutely endearing.
“Would it be too much to ask you to come on a walk with me?” Gustav asked with a small smile. “We can leave him here and just go walking together,” he said, and Marcel smiled and nodded.
Georg smiled and saluted them. “Have a nice day, Marcel-who-isn’t-easy,” he said and Marcel couldn’t fight the laugh that bubbled up, even if he was still angry at the insinuation in the first place.
“Goodbye, Georg the Crude Asshole,” he said with a salute, making Gustav snicker as they took their coffees and left.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I always played with two snare drums, and only one bass-“
Marcel was cut off by Gustav taking his hand, tugging him to the left. “I know a spot, come this way,” he said, smiling at Marcel, who blushed when Gustav didn’t drop his hand.
Marcel cleared his throat softly as he adjusted his grip, simply twisting to lace their fingers together. Gustav gave him a small smile and Marcel smiled back, fighting a blush. He was tired of being so shy. “Anyways, like I said, one bass and two snares,” he said and Gustav shook his head.
“You have to try a double bass setup. It’s the only way to play really,” he said and Marcel shrugged.
“How many cymbals do you use? I had two different setups. One of them was just a few, but the other involved an overhead rig so that I could fit on a few more big ones,” he asked, and Gustav grinned.
“Some of both, same as you. I started using more for the last tour since I was sponsored by Meinl,” he explained.
Marcel smiled. “I had a mix and match set. I mean, I was sponsored by different people at different times and I didn’t really stop using my favorite cymbals when we swapped sponsors, I just peeled the paint off the old ones,” he admitted and Gustav smirked.
“Sneaky,” he said, chuckling. “Do you still play? I mean, you can’t have completely stopped,” he said, and Marcel sighed.
“My real drums are in storage,” he said sadly. “I have an electric set stuffed in a corner of my tiny living room, but my apartment is just too small for a full kit. I mean,” he waved a hand. “I probably could’ve fit them in my bedroom if I had taken out my desk and keyboard and mixing equipment, but as much as I love my drums, I really love my editing and piano was the first thing I ever learned, you know?” he said, and Gustav nodded.
“I understand. I guess I’m just lucky and take it for granted. I cannot imagine not having a full set at my home. I mean, I’ve got a whole mini-studio in a soundproofed basement, so I play all the time and I forget a lot of people can’t,” he said and Marcel giggled.
“Oh yes, my neighbors would hate me if I had a full set. I can just imagine it,” he said, shaking his head.
Gustav chuckled. “They would beat down the walls with broomsticks, huh?” he asked and Marcel nodded.
“Definitely,” he said, then shrugged. “I miss living together with my friends because we would play together all the time. I miss having music in my life, but at the same time, I don’t miss the way things would be now if it had continued.” He shrugged. “I like being normal, I guess.”
Gustav smiled wistfully. “If I could be in a normal band, I think I’d like it. But as it is, I couldn’t leave my friends for the world. The way we work, I really doubt we’ll ever ‘break up’, you know? If we stop making music for a while- like now- we’ll still always be friends and see each other a lot.”
Marcel smiled. “You guys all grew up together, so you’re lucky you are still friends,” he said earnestly. “My old band, it was started by two friends who met another boy and became friends with him and decided to start a band. I was just a boy from a different side of town who answered an advert online. Same with our first keyboardist.” He smiled sadly. “And yet, of all five original members, or even our second keyboardist, the only two of us that are still close are me and Carsten. He was one of the original three and we still see our singer occasionally, one of the original two, but the others?” He shook his head. “I don’t even want to see them- well, our first keyboardist, I think I’ll get an email from him every year or so, just a ‘hi, how are you’ thing because I liked him, he was a good friend, but the other two? No desire to even see them again. And it sucks,” he added. “I don’t want it to sound like I’m a person who drops their friends, but… when you meet and become friends as kids, you change and grow so much so fast and suddenly the friend you knew is nothing like the person sitting in front of you.” He smiled sadly. “It’s lucky you and your friends made it through that.”
Gustav chuckled. “Honestly, I think we did our growing up by force, you know?” he suggested. “We didn’t get to be children anymore. We either didn’t grow up or grew up too soon, but the point is, we did it all together. I probably changed the most of any of us, honestly. At least personality wise,” he added, grinning. “I mean, have you seen Bill Kaulitz lately?! I never thought that pretty little girl would grow up to be a scruffy man,” he joked and Marcel laughed.
“You’re so mean,” he said, bumping their shoulders together, hands still laced together between them. “And come on, surely you all changed enough for it to matter.”
Gustav shrugged. “I got more reserved as I got older. I just… got over the lifestyle of a rock star. Georg, he’s always been pretty much the same since he’s the oldest. The only real difference is that now he doesn’t have the groupies since he really loves his girlfriend, but otherwise, nobody’s much different. Tom is still delusional and convinced he’s God’s gift to women and the ears of millions, Bill still thinks the sun shines out of his ass and the world should worship his glory, Georg is still annoying and funny and outgoing, and I was more into the partying and girls and stuff, but when it all started to be so oppressive, I just… lost interest.” He shrugged. “Now I don’t like to talk to people, I was never big on photo shoots, but now I sort of can’t ever decide what they want me to do… I just feel like it’s all stupid, sort of. It’s no longer a perk of being a rock star, it’s a necessary evil in order to get to play drums and not have a real job,” he said with a dismissive shrug.
Marcel started to speak, but Gustav changed course again. “Here,” he said, smiling up at Marcel as they ducked through a gated archway only to come out in a wild, unrestrained garden on a small lot between buildings. There was a fountain in the center and walkways, but the paths were partially obscured by flowers that had grown out of control, creeping over everything.
“Oh wow!” Marcel said, smiling brightly at Gustav. “This is pretty!” he gushed, gazing around excitedly. “Aww, it’s lovely, thank you for bringing me here,” he said and Gustav shrugged dismissively.
“I just figured we should have a destination for our walk,” he said and Marcel smiled, letting Gustav lead him over to a small stone bench near the fountain.
“I sort of understand what you said,” Marcel said, rolling his eyes somewhat. “You know, about the growing out of it,” he said. “I sort of never grew into it, but there was a point where knowing people liked me enough to want me to sign something was the best feeling in the world. In the end, I sort of hated everybody being so interested because nothing was just for me anymore. I had no way to stay private without looking like I was ungrateful.”
Gustav nodded. “I know what you mean,” he said and Marcel made a somewhat agreeing gesture before shrugging.
“Well, you know in a way, but I’ve always been this reticent,” he pointed out. “I’m… you barely know me, you can’t imagine how far from rock-star-material I was,” he urged. “I never did groupies,” he pointed out. “I never got any addictions either, not even just cigarettes. I don’t smoke, I didn’t ever sleep with a groupie, not even drunk off my ass, and I spent most of my time at the parties hiding at the DJ stand.”
Gustav chuckled. “Wow, really? You were so young and you’re so pretty, how on earth didn’t you take advantage?” he asked, and Marcel laughed softly.
“I don’t know. It never appealed to me. I mean, the only thing vaguely ‘rock star’ about me was that I really liked to drink and dance and have fun at parties.” He flushed. “Hell, the only boys I really even made out with- at least on tour- were my band mates,” he said, and Gustav cringed.
“Ew, I cannot imagine kissing my friends. That is horrible,” he said and Marcel grinned.
“It was our thing. I was behind a drum kit, but the guitarist and bassist and singer all kissed each other all the time on stage. Off stage, we all kissed for the attention and to show off,” he said. He groaned and covered his face. “If you tell anybody, I’ll hate you forever, but Carsten was the one who told me I was a horrible kisser and taught me how to be better,” he admitted and Gustav snickered.
“Well, I guess your relationships all just liked you too much to hurt your feelings?” he offered, and Marcel chuckled.
“Probably. My girlfriend never once complained about anything,” he said, shaking his head. “Although we were both so inexperienced when we started dating we’d barely kissed other people before. I was like… sixteen? Seventeen?” he said, shrugging. “Almost seventeen I think, when we started really dating.”
Gustav gave him an amused look. “I didn’t really expect you to be the girlfriend type. No offence, but you just come across as gay,” he said and Marcel shrugged, cheeks going pink.
“I don’t… know, really,” he admitted and Gustav tilted his head curiously. “I like people,” he said simply. “If they’re girls, that’s fine. If it’s a boy, that’s fine too. I don’t really… care. I guess I’m bisexual, but it’s more like I just see a person, not their gender, you know?” he asked, and Gustav smiled.
“I guess so. I mean, it really depends on if you mean as a girlfriend or boyfriend or just as a person of interest. I don’t think I’ve honestly really liked anybody in a long time,” he admitted. “I go on dates, I have short-term relationships, but I haven’t found anybody I really like in a very long time.”
Marcel grinned. “Me either,” he said, then bit his lip, wondering if he should go ahead and own up to it or not. He took a deep breath. “I’ve only ever really had the one girlfriend,” he said bravely. “I- I go on dates sometimes, but in reality, I’ve only had the one actual relationship.”
Gustav eyed him curiously and Marcel was sure he was about to say something horrible, only to be surprised when he shook his head, smiling in amusement. “I don’t know how. You’re beautiful,” he said and Marcel let out a surprised laugh.
“Well, being pretty doesn’t cancel out how horribly lame and quiet and boring I am,” he said and Gustav waved a hand.
“You aren’t boring. I like your personality quite a bit, if you must know.” He nudged him with their laced hands. “I find you terribly interesting.”
Marcel grinned. “I’m glad you do… you’re really cool, too,” he admitted, glancing down to hide his cheeks. He needed a tan or something, anything to make him not pink at the tiniest compliment.
Author: heartsdesire456
Rating: Eventually NC-17
POV: 3rd
Pairing: Marcel Gothow(Shin)/ Gustav Schafer
Summary: In life there were always moments when a single choice or action made all the difference. There were tiny details that could come to change lives forever. There were split-second decisions that would set in motion changes throughout one’s life, twisting and turning every second of one’s future based on a single, solitary event.
When he took a seat in almost the very back of the lecture hall on the first morning of class, Marcel had no way of knowing that his choice of seat would be one of those decisions.
A fic in which Marcel and Gustav happen to go to the same University and meet unexpectedly (based on the rumors about Gustav attending University during the break).
Disclaimer: "-Fic.tion: [noun] something feigned, invented, or imagined; a made-up story"
Author's Note: MUAHAHAHA! Have another chapter!
Marcel had already ordered a latte and got a small table in the back corner before Gustav showed up. He started to wave, only to blink and shrink back some when he saw Gustav wasn’t only with a friend, but there was a very big man in black trying to blend into the crowd. The man in black was wearing a pair of dark jeans and a black leather jacket, as well as a newspaper- clearly attempting to blend, but he was about seven feet tall and looked like he could easily swallow Marcel whole and not even be uncomfortable.
Marcel also felt uncomfortable with the fact that Gustav had a friend with him, leaving Marcel feeling sort of out of place. The friend and man in black went to the counter to wait in line, but Gustav headed straight for him when he spotted him. “Hi,” Marcel offered, and Gustav sighed heavily, sitting down beside him with a dark look.
“I am so sorry,” he said in a low, earnest voice, eyes growing somewhat wider. Marcel’s chest clenched a bit at how much those big brown eyes reminded him of a puppy. “I swear, I was on my way out the door when my asshole best friend showed up and when I said I had to go somewhere, he just invited himself. I tried to make him not, but he did anyways,” he said. “I understand entirely if you like… hate me now,” he muttered, looking honestly sorry.
Marcel just smiled and shook his head, taking a brave chance as he spoke. “It’s okay. Um… if I’d known I would be the uneven number, I would’ve brought Carsten, but… it’s alright, you can’t help when your friends are annoying.”
Gustav just smiled brightly. “You are far too understanding,” he said, then sighed. “So... how are you today?” he asked, and Marcel laughed.
“Well, you spoke to me not even an hour ago, so I’m just as fine now as I was then, but if you must know, I’m glad you wanted to see me again,” he admitted and Gustav just smiled at him, neither of them speaking for a few moments.
Marcel felt like a complete dork to be caught smiling lamely at each other when Gustav’s friend sat down with a flop. “Well thanks for just walking off and making me pay for your crap,” the friend said, shoving a coffee at Gustav, before glancing at Marcel with a raised eyebrow. “Ah, so this is where we were in such a hurry to be,” he said and Marcel ducked his eyes bashfully.
Gustav just scoffed. “I told you, Georg, you weren’t invited, but nooo, you had to come along. So now, you do not get to tease,” he declared and Marcel shot him a thankful smile.
The boy tossed his ponytail and scoffed. “If I had known it was a date, I would’ve still followed you, just to ruin your chances.” He smirked and gestured with his coffee. “It’s only fair to cockblock when my girlfriend is gone for two more weeks. If I’m not getting any, neither are you, my friend,” he said, and Marcel flushed, giving him an annoyed look.
Gustav glared. “I met him yesterday, asshole,” he said flatly and Georg shrugged.
“Hey, you never know, maybe he’s easy-“
Shin nearly choked on his coffee. “Hey!” he said, glaring at him. “I let a lot slide, but I will not sit here and let you suggest you know a damn thing about me to call me a slut!” he said, giving him a dark look.
Gustav looked absolutely mortified. “I am so sorry for him. If it will make you feel better, please know nobody will find his body tomorrow, or ever again,” he declared, then glared at his friend.
Georg just smiled. “Hey, I’m just messing with him,” he said, offering his hand to Marcel. “Georg Listing,” he said and Marcel shot him a dirty look, crossing his arms pointedly, refusing his handshake. “Oh don’t be like that, I didn’t mean to insult you-“
“You called him easy, Georg, what the hell else would he be other than insulted?!” Gustav hissed. “Really, Marcel,” he said, turning to him again. “Ridiculously sorry about him,” he urged and Marcel rolled his eyes.
“Well, I guess judging you by your friend wouldn’t be fair,” he relented, and Gustav gave him a hopeful look that Marcel found absolutely endearing.
“Would it be too much to ask you to come on a walk with me?” Gustav asked with a small smile. “We can leave him here and just go walking together,” he said, and Marcel smiled and nodded.
Georg smiled and saluted them. “Have a nice day, Marcel-who-isn’t-easy,” he said and Marcel couldn’t fight the laugh that bubbled up, even if he was still angry at the insinuation in the first place.
“Goodbye, Georg the Crude Asshole,” he said with a salute, making Gustav snicker as they took their coffees and left.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I always played with two snare drums, and only one bass-“
Marcel was cut off by Gustav taking his hand, tugging him to the left. “I know a spot, come this way,” he said, smiling at Marcel, who blushed when Gustav didn’t drop his hand.
Marcel cleared his throat softly as he adjusted his grip, simply twisting to lace their fingers together. Gustav gave him a small smile and Marcel smiled back, fighting a blush. He was tired of being so shy. “Anyways, like I said, one bass and two snares,” he said and Gustav shook his head.
“You have to try a double bass setup. It’s the only way to play really,” he said and Marcel shrugged.
“How many cymbals do you use? I had two different setups. One of them was just a few, but the other involved an overhead rig so that I could fit on a few more big ones,” he asked, and Gustav grinned.
“Some of both, same as you. I started using more for the last tour since I was sponsored by Meinl,” he explained.
Marcel smiled. “I had a mix and match set. I mean, I was sponsored by different people at different times and I didn’t really stop using my favorite cymbals when we swapped sponsors, I just peeled the paint off the old ones,” he admitted and Gustav smirked.
“Sneaky,” he said, chuckling. “Do you still play? I mean, you can’t have completely stopped,” he said, and Marcel sighed.
“My real drums are in storage,” he said sadly. “I have an electric set stuffed in a corner of my tiny living room, but my apartment is just too small for a full kit. I mean,” he waved a hand. “I probably could’ve fit them in my bedroom if I had taken out my desk and keyboard and mixing equipment, but as much as I love my drums, I really love my editing and piano was the first thing I ever learned, you know?” he said, and Gustav nodded.
“I understand. I guess I’m just lucky and take it for granted. I cannot imagine not having a full set at my home. I mean, I’ve got a whole mini-studio in a soundproofed basement, so I play all the time and I forget a lot of people can’t,” he said and Marcel giggled.
“Oh yes, my neighbors would hate me if I had a full set. I can just imagine it,” he said, shaking his head.
Gustav chuckled. “They would beat down the walls with broomsticks, huh?” he asked and Marcel nodded.
“Definitely,” he said, then shrugged. “I miss living together with my friends because we would play together all the time. I miss having music in my life, but at the same time, I don’t miss the way things would be now if it had continued.” He shrugged. “I like being normal, I guess.”
Gustav smiled wistfully. “If I could be in a normal band, I think I’d like it. But as it is, I couldn’t leave my friends for the world. The way we work, I really doubt we’ll ever ‘break up’, you know? If we stop making music for a while- like now- we’ll still always be friends and see each other a lot.”
Marcel smiled. “You guys all grew up together, so you’re lucky you are still friends,” he said earnestly. “My old band, it was started by two friends who met another boy and became friends with him and decided to start a band. I was just a boy from a different side of town who answered an advert online. Same with our first keyboardist.” He smiled sadly. “And yet, of all five original members, or even our second keyboardist, the only two of us that are still close are me and Carsten. He was one of the original three and we still see our singer occasionally, one of the original two, but the others?” He shook his head. “I don’t even want to see them- well, our first keyboardist, I think I’ll get an email from him every year or so, just a ‘hi, how are you’ thing because I liked him, he was a good friend, but the other two? No desire to even see them again. And it sucks,” he added. “I don’t want it to sound like I’m a person who drops their friends, but… when you meet and become friends as kids, you change and grow so much so fast and suddenly the friend you knew is nothing like the person sitting in front of you.” He smiled sadly. “It’s lucky you and your friends made it through that.”
Gustav chuckled. “Honestly, I think we did our growing up by force, you know?” he suggested. “We didn’t get to be children anymore. We either didn’t grow up or grew up too soon, but the point is, we did it all together. I probably changed the most of any of us, honestly. At least personality wise,” he added, grinning. “I mean, have you seen Bill Kaulitz lately?! I never thought that pretty little girl would grow up to be a scruffy man,” he joked and Marcel laughed.
“You’re so mean,” he said, bumping their shoulders together, hands still laced together between them. “And come on, surely you all changed enough for it to matter.”
Gustav shrugged. “I got more reserved as I got older. I just… got over the lifestyle of a rock star. Georg, he’s always been pretty much the same since he’s the oldest. The only real difference is that now he doesn’t have the groupies since he really loves his girlfriend, but otherwise, nobody’s much different. Tom is still delusional and convinced he’s God’s gift to women and the ears of millions, Bill still thinks the sun shines out of his ass and the world should worship his glory, Georg is still annoying and funny and outgoing, and I was more into the partying and girls and stuff, but when it all started to be so oppressive, I just… lost interest.” He shrugged. “Now I don’t like to talk to people, I was never big on photo shoots, but now I sort of can’t ever decide what they want me to do… I just feel like it’s all stupid, sort of. It’s no longer a perk of being a rock star, it’s a necessary evil in order to get to play drums and not have a real job,” he said with a dismissive shrug.
Marcel started to speak, but Gustav changed course again. “Here,” he said, smiling up at Marcel as they ducked through a gated archway only to come out in a wild, unrestrained garden on a small lot between buildings. There was a fountain in the center and walkways, but the paths were partially obscured by flowers that had grown out of control, creeping over everything.
“Oh wow!” Marcel said, smiling brightly at Gustav. “This is pretty!” he gushed, gazing around excitedly. “Aww, it’s lovely, thank you for bringing me here,” he said and Gustav shrugged dismissively.
“I just figured we should have a destination for our walk,” he said and Marcel smiled, letting Gustav lead him over to a small stone bench near the fountain.
“I sort of understand what you said,” Marcel said, rolling his eyes somewhat. “You know, about the growing out of it,” he said. “I sort of never grew into it, but there was a point where knowing people liked me enough to want me to sign something was the best feeling in the world. In the end, I sort of hated everybody being so interested because nothing was just for me anymore. I had no way to stay private without looking like I was ungrateful.”
Gustav nodded. “I know what you mean,” he said and Marcel made a somewhat agreeing gesture before shrugging.
“Well, you know in a way, but I’ve always been this reticent,” he pointed out. “I’m… you barely know me, you can’t imagine how far from rock-star-material I was,” he urged. “I never did groupies,” he pointed out. “I never got any addictions either, not even just cigarettes. I don’t smoke, I didn’t ever sleep with a groupie, not even drunk off my ass, and I spent most of my time at the parties hiding at the DJ stand.”
Gustav chuckled. “Wow, really? You were so young and you’re so pretty, how on earth didn’t you take advantage?” he asked, and Marcel laughed softly.
“I don’t know. It never appealed to me. I mean, the only thing vaguely ‘rock star’ about me was that I really liked to drink and dance and have fun at parties.” He flushed. “Hell, the only boys I really even made out with- at least on tour- were my band mates,” he said, and Gustav cringed.
“Ew, I cannot imagine kissing my friends. That is horrible,” he said and Marcel grinned.
“It was our thing. I was behind a drum kit, but the guitarist and bassist and singer all kissed each other all the time on stage. Off stage, we all kissed for the attention and to show off,” he said. He groaned and covered his face. “If you tell anybody, I’ll hate you forever, but Carsten was the one who told me I was a horrible kisser and taught me how to be better,” he admitted and Gustav snickered.
“Well, I guess your relationships all just liked you too much to hurt your feelings?” he offered, and Marcel chuckled.
“Probably. My girlfriend never once complained about anything,” he said, shaking his head. “Although we were both so inexperienced when we started dating we’d barely kissed other people before. I was like… sixteen? Seventeen?” he said, shrugging. “Almost seventeen I think, when we started really dating.”
Gustav gave him an amused look. “I didn’t really expect you to be the girlfriend type. No offence, but you just come across as gay,” he said and Marcel shrugged, cheeks going pink.
“I don’t… know, really,” he admitted and Gustav tilted his head curiously. “I like people,” he said simply. “If they’re girls, that’s fine. If it’s a boy, that’s fine too. I don’t really… care. I guess I’m bisexual, but it’s more like I just see a person, not their gender, you know?” he asked, and Gustav smiled.
“I guess so. I mean, it really depends on if you mean as a girlfriend or boyfriend or just as a person of interest. I don’t think I’ve honestly really liked anybody in a long time,” he admitted. “I go on dates, I have short-term relationships, but I haven’t found anybody I really like in a very long time.”
Marcel grinned. “Me either,” he said, then bit his lip, wondering if he should go ahead and own up to it or not. He took a deep breath. “I’ve only ever really had the one girlfriend,” he said bravely. “I- I go on dates sometimes, but in reality, I’ve only had the one actual relationship.”
Gustav eyed him curiously and Marcel was sure he was about to say something horrible, only to be surprised when he shook his head, smiling in amusement. “I don’t know how. You’re beautiful,” he said and Marcel let out a surprised laugh.
“Well, being pretty doesn’t cancel out how horribly lame and quiet and boring I am,” he said and Gustav waved a hand.
“You aren’t boring. I like your personality quite a bit, if you must know.” He nudged him with their laced hands. “I find you terribly interesting.”
Marcel grinned. “I’m glad you do… you’re really cool, too,” he admitted, glancing down to hide his cheeks. He needed a tan or something, anything to make him not pink at the tiniest compliment.