"Can't believe how strange it is to be anything at all"
I feel that it's been far too long since I've written a characteristic Ashleyrant, which is an LJ post with no point, purpose, or logic, filled with words I make up like "Ashleyrant." I'm sure you all feel the same way. So here we go.
I think it's sad that we don't use the word "love" that much. I don't know what causes what, but I believe that not saying the word as much usually goes hand in hand with not loving as much. I'm not suggesting that people start throwing the word around like "ho" or "bitch" or anything. Overusing a word devalues whatever the word represents. But careful usage of the word "love" could make so many people happier. Don't lie, when somebody says "I love you" when you're not expecting it, doesn't it make you smile? Or if they sign a card "Love" instead of "Sincerely"? But back to my nonpoint. I wish it were okay for people to say "I love you" to non-family in a platonic way, like in Spanish. In Spanish there's "amar," which means "to love," but it has a romantic connotation. Then there's "querer," which generally refers to platonic love, but can sometimes be sort of ambiguous. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's pretty much how it was taught to me. Anyway, it would be nice to have an English equivalent to "querer."
I'm so excited about this season of So You Think You Can Dance. This year's female dancers are better than those of any past year as a whole, in my opinion. Jessi's amazing. Oh, and I can't believe it- Jimmy, this guy who danced in Voice From Within with Melissa and me, is in the top 20!
In other news, I got the stomach flu (if you didn't gather that from my last entry) and had two panic attacks. I had never had a panic attack before, and these two scared me because there was no psychological trigger or anything. I didn't even know the first was a panic attack until afterwards. All that happened is my chest got tight and I had trouble breathing. So as my mom was waiting for a nurse to call her back, I looked up "shortness of breath" as a symptom on some diagnosis website, and it said that I either was having a heart attack or I had a collapsed lung. Seeing that did *not* help. But both panic attacks went away on their own, and now that I'm done with the stomach flu, they shouldn't be coming back.
Oh, and I went to the ER because I got dehydrated from the stomach flu. I hadn't been that scared in a long time. In my dehydrated delirium, I thought I was going to die. And it's actually interesting: I didn't think that I should have done more drugs or had more sex or carped more diems. I was just upset that I hadn't accomplished certain goals. So maybe sitting in the woods smoking a joint isn't the answer to all of life's problems. Sorry, Nicole.
Okay I will end this post with words of wisdom that would have saved me much pain: Wash your hands obsessive compulsively. Dead serious. You're actually supposed to wash them for 30 seconds to a minute. And do it every time before you eat ANYTHING. Washing my hands often and well probably would have prevented me from getting the stomach flu. So please, put your OCD to good use (everyone has a little in them), and wash your damn hands. Thank you.
I think it's sad that we don't use the word "love" that much. I don't know what causes what, but I believe that not saying the word as much usually goes hand in hand with not loving as much. I'm not suggesting that people start throwing the word around like "ho" or "bitch" or anything. Overusing a word devalues whatever the word represents. But careful usage of the word "love" could make so many people happier. Don't lie, when somebody says "I love you" when you're not expecting it, doesn't it make you smile? Or if they sign a card "Love" instead of "Sincerely"? But back to my nonpoint. I wish it were okay for people to say "I love you" to non-family in a platonic way, like in Spanish. In Spanish there's "amar," which means "to love," but it has a romantic connotation. Then there's "querer," which generally refers to platonic love, but can sometimes be sort of ambiguous. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that's pretty much how it was taught to me. Anyway, it would be nice to have an English equivalent to "querer."
I'm so excited about this season of So You Think You Can Dance. This year's female dancers are better than those of any past year as a whole, in my opinion. Jessi's amazing. Oh, and I can't believe it- Jimmy, this guy who danced in Voice From Within with Melissa and me, is in the top 20!
In other news, I got the stomach flu (if you didn't gather that from my last entry) and had two panic attacks. I had never had a panic attack before, and these two scared me because there was no psychological trigger or anything. I didn't even know the first was a panic attack until afterwards. All that happened is my chest got tight and I had trouble breathing. So as my mom was waiting for a nurse to call her back, I looked up "shortness of breath" as a symptom on some diagnosis website, and it said that I either was having a heart attack or I had a collapsed lung. Seeing that did *not* help. But both panic attacks went away on their own, and now that I'm done with the stomach flu, they shouldn't be coming back.
Oh, and I went to the ER because I got dehydrated from the stomach flu. I hadn't been that scared in a long time. In my dehydrated delirium, I thought I was going to die. And it's actually interesting: I didn't think that I should have done more drugs or had more sex or carped more diems. I was just upset that I hadn't accomplished certain goals. So maybe sitting in the woods smoking a joint isn't the answer to all of life's problems. Sorry, Nicole.
Okay I will end this post with words of wisdom that would have saved me much pain: Wash your hands obsessive compulsively. Dead serious. You're actually supposed to wash them for 30 seconds to a minute. And do it every time before you eat ANYTHING. Washing my hands often and well probably would have prevented me from getting the stomach flu. So please, put your OCD to good use (everyone has a little in them), and wash your damn hands. Thank you.