i think i'm in trouble. i don't know what to do.

yeah. not at all.

"it's not so much that nothing means/ anything but more that it keeps meaning/ nothing,/
There's no release, just gurus and self /appointed gods and hucksters./The more people say, the less there is to say./ even the best books are dry sawdust"

i don't need anyone anymore.
and i can do whatever the fuck i want.

because there's no one left to disappoint.

 today, i do not like myself very much.

im pretty pointless.

i've pretty much become the people i always made fun of. the stupid drunk sluts that get high every weekend for no apparent reason.

this is.... weekend number three that i've smoked/drank friday saturday sunday.

and some weekdays....
it's the only time i actually feel like, happy or even a little good about myself.
pahh. but i don't like it.

i tend to ( Read more... )

 my fucking mother won't let me get a drivers lisence because she doesnt think im stable enough.
when does she decide this? the night before my birthday, just as im getting all of my passport shit together.

so, since im angry and probably completley irrational, im not speaking anymore.

 it feels like everyone is moving on except me. i'm stuck.

i was in her town for the first time tonight since before... well yeah.
and it was wierd. i kept remembering stuff we did in certain places, the diner we ate at, the movie theater, the lampost we would loiter under.

it just didnt feel right.
and now im all anxious. im hoping everyone else was ( Read more... )

 so basically all i do now is sleep.
no one talks to me anymore.
no one cares about anything i do.

i'm losing touch with everyone from summer,  and i hate it so much.
no one here gives a shit about me.
my mom even saw one of my cuts yesterday, literally said "oh. that again."

i'm just a useless hump of nothing.

 I hate to break this to you but being a coward is not a legitimate career
10 bucks says you don't have it in you To conquer fear and quit believing what they tell you to

fuck him.