(no subject)
The Epic Sporking Continues!
Title: the sound of a breaking heart
Author: rikusgirl222222
Rating:
For the Sues, one of those 'OMG I'M IN KINGDOM HEARTS YAY' plots, the horrid grammar, sentence structure, OOCness, and some whatthefuckery.
Full Name (including any titles): Sue-ish Mistish Balancer of Whatthefuck.
Full Species(es): Sue of Light and Darkness. LOSE. D:
Hair Color (include adjectives): Not mentioned yet.
Eye Color (include adjectives): See above. :)
Unusual Markings/Colorations/Physical Features: Unknown so far.
Special Possessions (if any): The powers of light and darkness. D:
Origin: Her room.
Connections To Canon Characters: Reading the summary, she's Riku's girlfriend. LOSE ONCE MORE.
Special Abilities: Her strange whatthefuck mist.
Other Annoying Traits: To be annoying and bossy.
I Say/Notes: Long time no see, eh? ^^;
Sample:
Alas, the curtain opens up to reveal…a new sporking team, a duo in fact!!
Olette: Hum? How did I get here?
Kairi: Your guess is as good as mine. *munching merrily away on “OMG JUMBO BUCKET” of popcorn*
Olette: So, where’s Anna?
Kairi: She retired.
Olette: What! Why?
Kairi: She said it was none of my business. *Puts bucket in-between her and Olette*
rg:wow people like this story. but, ansem still found out my rath.
Olette: That single sentence made my head hurt.
Kairi: Get ready for even more of it.
ansem:laying in a pool of his own blood.
Kairi: WHAT.
Olette: Is that even possible for the normal Sue-ish author?
yume:i think you over did it.
Olette: What part of ‘scripting isn’t allowed on FF.Net’ does she not get?
rg:sooooooo? anyway yume (touya) is my best friend in real life. she loves kh but i'm always playing it.
Kairi: *Shoveling popcorn into mouth*
Olette: I don’t think bingeing is going to get your mind off of this. No offence, please.
yume:yeah you can repeat almost every line,baka
rg:loser
Kairi: That’s not very nice.
Olette: How now, brown cow?
Kairi: *Turns to stare at Olette*
yume:...
ansem:...X.X
"Well given the area, were in wonderland right?" Tsuki asked.
Kairi: *Runs to highest point in theater* Oh where oh where oh where has the gramm~~ar gone? Oh where oh where can it beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?
Olette: *snort*
MCP: SIT DOWN, USER.
"Yeah how'd you know?" Sora asked. "Trust me you don't want to know."Tsuki said. "is alice gone?" Tsuki asked.
Kairi: Fragmenting the same speaker’s comments into two separate sentences right next to each other is made of LOSE. D:
"Yeah, we were heading to the bazar room." Sora said.
Olette: ‘Bazar’…? Like in…Agrabah?
Kairi: D:
"Ok then Donald please don't use fire on the trickmaster." Tsuki said. "why?" Donald asked. "because i said so!" Tsuki yelled.
Olette: He probably would do it anyways, ignoring the Sue.
HOORAY WE IS NOW IN DEEP JUNGLE
"what the hell, where i'm i?" Yume said looking around.
Kairi: Capitalize please, and add your grammar and proper punctuation and sentence structure to get a wholesome sentence! Part of a good fiction.
Olette: *HEADSMACK*
she was sitting on a tree somewhere in the deep jungle.
Olette: Wouldn’t she be mauled by killer monkeys by now?
Kairi: We could only hope. *Pats shoulder*
"i had a strange feeling something bad was going to happen."
Both: It already has.
NOW WE IS BACK WITH TEAM SUE
"that thing is huge!"Tsuki cried. "i thought you said you'd played the game!" sora said. "i did but i wasn't in it!"
Kairi: Logic!
Tsuki said shaking. "I don't even have a wepon."
Olette: Spell right, please! Its very annoying when you don’t.
"then just stay out of the way" donald said jumping at the heartless.
Both: *WORSHIP*
20 minutes later
Kairi: Wouldn’t they be dead or be standing around the empty room by now?
Olette: Most likely.
things are not looking good for the home team. Donald and Goofy are knocked out. Sora is close to dieing, and the trick master is chaseing after him.
Olette: Block paragraph of doooooom! *Reaches into bucket of popcorn*
Kairi: Going from past sentence structure to present sentence structure equals lose.
when the heartless was on the finishing blow Tsuki screamed "kuro kiri!" a black fog filled the room.
Olette: It’s The Mist!! Run!!!
Kairi: The Mist is white, Olette.
Olette: It’s The Sue Mist!
when it touched the heartless. it dissapeared, the heart it was useing floating in the sky.
Olette: Shouldn’t that first period be a comma, and ‘useing’ should be ‘using’ and…
"shiro kiri." tsuki said holding her hands out.
Kairi: Fanbrat Japanese!
Olette: *Flipping through Japanese Language Guide* I don’t know…
white fog filled the room healing every one. "Gawsh that was cool Tsuki!" goofy said. "Yeah but i don't know how i did it. the words just came to me." Tsuki said.
Kairi: Not another one of those ‘instant knowledge, yay!’ Sues…
Olette: The only one I’ve seen was…*Trails off*
"What! your the balancer and you didn't know?" Donald screamed. "Balancer?" Sora asked. "The balancer is a person who can control the light and dark at the same time. The person is to uphold the balance. You know make it so that theres good and evil." Tsuki said.
Kairi: Instant suck. I’m tired of these types of Sues. *sighs*
Olette: Grammar please!
"So if i'm the balancer then i shouldn't be on anyside."
"well no you can be on anyside, but choose carefully." a voice said.
Kairi: Now she’s hearing voices. Maybe she’s mad.
Olette: *Reaches for script, but is blocked off* Looks like we won’t get to know anytime soon.
"did you guys hear that?" Tsuki asked. "no why?"Sora asked. " nevermind." Tsuki said. "next we go to thje olympus coliseum,
Olette: ‘Thje Olympus Coliseum’ What is this, Egypt?
but first i think you guys should train up in traverse town."
NOW WE'RE IN A GUMMI SHIP YAY :D
"I think i'm going to throw up!." Tsuki yelled. "Donald i told you, you drive horrable! so let me drive." Sora said. "i think i'll pass." Tsuki said.
Kairi: I’d like to pass this fiction, please!
MCP: DENIED.
rg:well i'll contune later on this week. so ja ne
Olette: She used more than three languages in one chapter!
kuro kiri- black fog
shiro kiri- white fog
Olette: I’m out!
Kairi: Right behind you!
[EDIT] Lines and small text fixed! ^^