How to disappear completely.
I have this incredible urge, almost a need to write. I know my plot, and the setting is so vividly embedded into my mind that I could make little clay models out of it, right down to the park benches. I open up the word processor with a great gush of excitement, waiting for the natural words to flow out ...... An hour later, I'm still staring at a blank page document watching the cursor flash. I don't know if it's simply because I can't find the right words, or if there are simply no words that suits right here, if the vocabulary is too limited to write what I wish to articulate.
photo below credits to: Francisca Pageo
I started feeling some sort of narrow distance to stupor after the circulation of you, and still you alone emerged ; wandering around at the location consuming superfluous endeavors with your confidant. I am dying to demonstrate my validity of intransparent presence as you may think. I have to do something for myself in own way of entrusting every trivial corollary of unexpended excess when attempting to love you more. It's effortless for me to become emotionally correspond to nauseous after all the expansion out of my consolatory zone. I'd never give a proper respond before due time. I always miscarry the perfect time when opportunities are blown across my face. I have a tendency to withdraw your vicinity by attending pedagogics almost everyday in a week. And you don't know I have an engrossment with permanent hallucination about everything you do. Anticipating the next word from the throat of your response - like the "sorry" you gave me abruptly through a hard line of your lips. Retain the appearance on tuesday of your newly, improved hair, made me grinned along the whole afternoon continuously till late night ... Think of hoping to see you the next week with your usual magnetism.