(no subject)
There was a point in time when I was about 5/6, as I tried to fall asleep on my bed, my mind would start thinking about how much I dreaded going to school. My heart was heavy, I feared for so much things. It was like experiencing nightmares, even though I was awake. I was so afraid, I wanted to cry but no, the tears wouldn't fall. My mind would be filled with panic.
Nervous, jitters, over what one may ask? Well, all things possible that were about to happen the next day in school.
7am would come, I would have to be awake. Inside I was shaking, dying, hoping the day would go past faster. Living in fear that I would commit something so wrong that would land me in trouble. Alas, I would. I would make at least 1 mistake a day, as though it's a routine.
Fast forward about 12 odd years, I still feel that bout of fear inside of me. This time, I would be heading to work, to the office. Reality hits me, all seriousness is required. Chaos, laughter, anger, happiness, anxiety, stress all contained in one space.
What am I to look forward to? I've barely started out on what I may call a career in the future, am I supposed to be looking forward to my retirement? Or death perhaps?
Life is a complete nightmare. I just want to sleep, forever. Allow me to close my eyes, fall into deep slumber, have the happiest and most fulfilling dream and let me not wake up.
Nervous, jitters, over what one may ask? Well, all things possible that were about to happen the next day in school.
7am would come, I would have to be awake. Inside I was shaking, dying, hoping the day would go past faster. Living in fear that I would commit something so wrong that would land me in trouble. Alas, I would. I would make at least 1 mistake a day, as though it's a routine.
Fast forward about 12 odd years, I still feel that bout of fear inside of me. This time, I would be heading to work, to the office. Reality hits me, all seriousness is required. Chaos, laughter, anger, happiness, anxiety, stress all contained in one space.
What am I to look forward to? I've barely started out on what I may call a career in the future, am I supposed to be looking forward to my retirement? Or death perhaps?
Life is a complete nightmare. I just want to sleep, forever. Allow me to close my eyes, fall into deep slumber, have the happiest and most fulfilling dream and let me not wake up.