From a Jane Magazine interview with Zooey Deschanel ( Read more... )

“It’s a glorified welfare project,” said Sea Shepherd Captain Alex Cornelissen. “These sealers live on hand-outs from the government and they just simply don’t have the initiative to get an education and to find an alternative job. The government finds them markets for their obscene products, the government breaks the ice for them to kill the seals ( Read more... )

"Give me a pop-song, mate. Give me a fucking pop-song. Not only is it more fun, it's pretty fuckin' hard to write as well. You can bung in as many out-of-tune oboes as you want, but putting chords together so they sound pleasant isn't as simple as it might appear. It mightn't be the Sistine Chapel, but what is? Ollie fucking Olsen with his stupid ( Read more... )

"I know that the decisions that I made after college worked out. But at the time I didn’t know that they would. See college is not necessarily predictive of your future success. And it’s the kind of thing where the path that I chose obviously wouldn’t work for you. For one, you’re not very funny ( Read more... )

"...How would you go about your day and act like everything is all normal when you know for sure that there’s a giant magical bunny running around the world once a year sneaking into your house and hiding eggs and shit everywhere?"

- Joe Rogan, on the Easter Bunny

I live in the Twentieth Century
and you lie here beside me. You
were unhappy when you fell asleep.
There was nothing I could do about
it. I felt hopeless. Your face
is so beautiful that I cannot stop
to describe it, and there's nothing
I can do to make you happy while
you sleep.

- Richard Brautigan

"Dianna Ross Be Coming Out Your Ass"

- Geto Boys, "Size Ain't Shit", the single most confusing gangsta rap song ever written.

"I hate gay people."
- Tim Hardaway, NBA player

"One day, when you least expect it, I will have sex with you!"
- George Takei, in response to Tim Hardaway

http://youtube.com/watch?v=-me8KUtXIWo&mode=related&search=

“How perfectly goddamned delightful it all is, to be sure.”

- Charles Crumb, on life.

(You should see the movie "Crumb". It's about Robert Crumb, the artist, but his brother Charles steals the show.)

Marge: Dr Marvin Monroe! I haven't seen you in years ( Read more... )