(no subject)
nyah.. though ive only shared this earlier to twinneh.. i think its best i tell you guys as well..
first of all, id like to apologize for not posting here for AGES.. >__< for sum weird reason, i completely forgot that i had an LJ account!!! XD Actually, i havent been online that much as well.. but thats because of work. now, i might NOT be online for a week or so.. and its quite possible that i might not be online on twinneh's bday.. though i will try my best..
you see .. my grandfather had a heartattack last monday.. he was rushed to the hospital and had to be revived twice. Later it was found that he had three clogged arteries in his heart. He's 75 years old so its doubtful he'd survive surgery.. but we hoped and prayed that he'd pull through.. last wednesday.. we received the good news.. his heartbeat was steady. and he might be transferring from the ICU to a private room.. i was very happy to hear that. you see, i havent been able to visit my grandfather since he was hospitalized coz of work. and so i planned to visit him on thursday afternoon.. coz by then id be free from the hectic tutor lessons that ive been doing since last week.
today is thursday night. i woke up this morning and found out that my grandfather passed away. im the only one among my siblings who knows this as of the moment. my siblings dont know yet .. my dad doesnt want them to know just yet coz they have their final exams in the university today.
>__< i never got to visit him and tell him that i loved him before he died. im not a person who usually says mushy stuff to people.. i rarely say i love you to my siblings and close friends.. face to face. i get uncomfortable when i do this.. >__< now.. i wish that i had been more vocal. this is my biggest regret. ive never told my grandfather how much i appreciated him.. he's the quiet and a man of few words.. BUT the last thing he said to me.. which was a month ago.. was how proud he was of me.. the way i help my family and being the dutiful and loving daughter/granddaughter.. and he sort of gave me his blessing and then he hugged me. and i just stood there.. like sum mute..and i just hugged him and mumbled an ok and thank you.. but i never told him how much i loved him too..and thanked him for his many words of encouragement. >__< i feel so stupid..
anyway, funerals here in the philippines is NOT a small affair.. i mean the mourning period and the whole process will take a lot of time. most probably id be assigned to the "night shift vigil" or at least look after my little cousins during the funeral wake. which means that i wont be online for sum time.. i dont know yet when the burial will be.. and i dont know if we will be waiting for the arrival of sum of our relatives from Canada before my grandfather is buried. anyhow.. i just feel drained.. thats all. >__< and its kinda depressing.. since my grandfather was supposed to celebrate his 76th bday this nov.9.. and with the "All Soul's Day" (Nov. 1 .. aka day of the dead?) just around the corner.. >> its really not helping.
anyhow.. so yeah.. i might not be online..
oh and.. yeah.. if you havent told I LOVE YOU to your loved one lately.. whether its your bf/gf, siblings, parents.. or grandparents or whoever it may be.. DO IT! dont make the same mistake i did..
first of all, id like to apologize for not posting here for AGES.. >__< for sum weird reason, i completely forgot that i had an LJ account!!! XD Actually, i havent been online that much as well.. but thats because of work. now, i might NOT be online for a week or so.. and its quite possible that i might not be online on twinneh's bday.. though i will try my best..
you see .. my grandfather had a heartattack last monday.. he was rushed to the hospital and had to be revived twice. Later it was found that he had three clogged arteries in his heart. He's 75 years old so its doubtful he'd survive surgery.. but we hoped and prayed that he'd pull through.. last wednesday.. we received the good news.. his heartbeat was steady. and he might be transferring from the ICU to a private room.. i was very happy to hear that. you see, i havent been able to visit my grandfather since he was hospitalized coz of work. and so i planned to visit him on thursday afternoon.. coz by then id be free from the hectic tutor lessons that ive been doing since last week.
today is thursday night. i woke up this morning and found out that my grandfather passed away. im the only one among my siblings who knows this as of the moment. my siblings dont know yet .. my dad doesnt want them to know just yet coz they have their final exams in the university today.
>__< i never got to visit him and tell him that i loved him before he died. im not a person who usually says mushy stuff to people.. i rarely say i love you to my siblings and close friends.. face to face. i get uncomfortable when i do this.. >__< now.. i wish that i had been more vocal. this is my biggest regret. ive never told my grandfather how much i appreciated him.. he's the quiet and a man of few words.. BUT the last thing he said to me.. which was a month ago.. was how proud he was of me.. the way i help my family and being the dutiful and loving daughter/granddaughter.. and he sort of gave me his blessing and then he hugged me. and i just stood there.. like sum mute..and i just hugged him and mumbled an ok and thank you.. but i never told him how much i loved him too..and thanked him for his many words of encouragement. >__< i feel so stupid..
anyway, funerals here in the philippines is NOT a small affair.. i mean the mourning period and the whole process will take a lot of time. most probably id be assigned to the "night shift vigil" or at least look after my little cousins during the funeral wake. which means that i wont be online for sum time.. i dont know yet when the burial will be.. and i dont know if we will be waiting for the arrival of sum of our relatives from Canada before my grandfather is buried. anyhow.. i just feel drained.. thats all. >__< and its kinda depressing.. since my grandfather was supposed to celebrate his 76th bday this nov.9.. and with the "All Soul's Day" (Nov. 1 .. aka day of the dead?) just around the corner.. >> its really not helping.
anyhow.. so yeah.. i might not be online..
oh and.. yeah.. if you havent told I LOVE YOU to your loved one lately.. whether its your bf/gf, siblings, parents.. or grandparents or whoever it may be.. DO IT! dont make the same mistake i did..