(no subject)
So I did several really retarded things today. The first being I had a very large bowl of fruit for breakfast in hopes of boosting my sinking ship that some people call a metabolism. (This made me hungry for the rest of the day.) I then decided to do an hour dance class and an hour on the elliptical... which was GREAT and I burned up more than the calories I ate- but by the time I got out of the gym and back home (approx. 4pm) I was so fucking starving I went nuts and ate the rest of my calories for the day in about 15 minutes.
So at this point I decided it would be a good idea not to eat for the rest of the day... then Jack came over and decided it was necessary that we eat TOGETHER. And since we just got back together, i figured I shouldn't fuck it up with my eating issues again. So I ate with jack, and then he left, and then things were good for a bit until he called me up and we ONCE AGAIN got in a fight. So I binged out. After an already too high calorie day I just snapped. Like completely lost it.
I consumed over 1400 fucking calories today. Then I swallowed a handful of laxies and went back to the gym until it closed. I think I alleviated SOME of the damage... but I think I'm going to wait until Friday to get on the scale again. All I need it to wake up two pounds heavier tomorrow and stuff my damn face again as I cry hysterically.
Todays Calories (This is so embarrassingly gross- you may not want to read this.)
Strawberries 54
Pineapple 11
Grapes 17
Kiwi Fruit, (Chinese Gooseberries), Fresh 15
Mangos 13
Bananas 25
Broccoli, Flower Clusters - Raw 40
Strawberries 133
Broccoli, Flower Clusters - Raw 40
shrimp 80
cc spread 25
cheese 20
sour cream lite 20
taters 96
binge 76
binge 45
binge 135
binge 135
binge 180
binge 100
binge 55
binge 115
Total Calories Consumed 1,430
Minus Exercise Calories Burned - 925
NET CAL INTAKE= 505 (Which is better than it could have been, but god, it makes me sick just to look at it.)
So at this point I decided it would be a good idea not to eat for the rest of the day... then Jack came over and decided it was necessary that we eat TOGETHER. And since we just got back together, i figured I shouldn't fuck it up with my eating issues again. So I ate with jack, and then he left, and then things were good for a bit until he called me up and we ONCE AGAIN got in a fight. So I binged out. After an already too high calorie day I just snapped. Like completely lost it.
I consumed over 1400 fucking calories today. Then I swallowed a handful of laxies and went back to the gym until it closed. I think I alleviated SOME of the damage... but I think I'm going to wait until Friday to get on the scale again. All I need it to wake up two pounds heavier tomorrow and stuff my damn face again as I cry hysterically.
Todays Calories (This is so embarrassingly gross- you may not want to read this.)
Strawberries 54
Pineapple 11
Grapes 17
Kiwi Fruit, (Chinese Gooseberries), Fresh 15
Mangos 13
Bananas 25
Broccoli, Flower Clusters - Raw 40
Strawberries 133
Broccoli, Flower Clusters - Raw 40
shrimp 80
cc spread 25
cheese 20
sour cream lite 20
taters 96
binge 76
binge 45
binge 135
binge 135
binge 180
binge 100
binge 55
binge 115
Total Calories Consumed 1,430
Minus Exercise Calories Burned - 925
NET CAL INTAKE= 505 (Which is better than it could have been, but god, it makes me sick just to look at it.)